Chapter 41: A Broken Relationship

My heart was hammering, I was frozen in my spot; my head diverted in slow motion to look at Hayden whose eyes were fixated on the woman standing before us...the woman who was our mother. My breathing I noticed started to get faster as my mind went completely blank with leaving me in what felt like darkness. Except there was one question: how was I supposed to handle what comes next? It was a moment of realisation, I'd never thought about this day and I mean how could I have done I only found out yesterday about all this and now she stood in front of me. There's been no time to let the news sink in, I've had no time to register it properly. How am I supposed to react? How am I supposed to speak to her I don't know? Yet she was stood in front of me so I knew I had to think fast otherwise these next moments to come are going to become very uncomfortable. When I decided to let my eyes fall back on the two women who stood before Hayden and me, my eyes automatically landed on her. I felt so far away from her even though she was standing near but for once in my life I actually had nothing to say; in a way it was unsettling. "Mother, what are you doing here?" Hayden's voice sounded sharp almost aggressive as well as he didn't let his gaze fall of our mother. That was another thing, I couldn't grasp hold of the fact that now I had to call another person my mother; I've spent my whole life calling who I thought was my mother, well mother but when in reality she's almost like a step-mother to me because she isn't of my blood. My real mother was standing right in front of me; but I was right as I looked upon her she looked almost nervous yet there was also a glow about her though that glow was only directed onto me because that was the only place her eyes would settle.

"I just asked you a question!" Hayden's voice rose and the growl of anger which I believe he tried to keep hidden was exposed; it seemed however Hayden kept being ignored as no one would answer him, it was as if he wasn't even stood right next to me because even Yvette's gaze was focused on me. "Willow, this is -," but I cut Yvette off as my voice finally broke through the block in my throat "Elyria..." at the same time my voice was low and lost, I was still lost in the moment, I still didn't know how to handle what was right in front of me. Elyria's gaze wouldn't fall off me, it was starting to make me uncomfortable but at the same time my eyes wouldn't fall off her. "Hi Willow," that's when she spoke for the second time, her voice was soft and gentle sounding welcoming and the nerve that I was feeling started to disappear but only very slowly. "Do you even see me?" now my head diverted back to Hayden but so did Elyria's, yet through the corner of my eye I noticed the glow that Elyria gave was now gone it was as if it vanished entirely. Finally though, she met eye contact with her son who still bore a dreadful glare of anger across his face "Hayden please, don't talk like that," Elyria tried calming her son down but it seemed as if Hayden was going to listen just as Elyria wasn't listening to him "Like what mom, don't talk like what? Anger, frustration please tell me," but she wouldn't instead her gaze fell straight back off him with nothing else to say. It hurt me to watch that so I couldn't imagine what that must feel like for him. Elyria made sure however, her gaze fell back on me and in doing so I noticed the glow fall back into place. It didn't feel right...it didn't feel right at all.

"Seriously, you're going to ignore me. What sort of mother ignores her own son?" the questioning to his voice connected to the rage was starting to become uneasy for the atmosphere around us and I didn't like it "Hayden come on stop," surprisingly it was me that spoke and I didn't know why, I knew inside that right now this must be killing him so why would I tell him to stop? Was it because I thought that maybe it's the right thing to do, would he lose control if he carried on acting this way? "Why? I'm not going to stand for that," when Hayden spoke to me the rage was gone, it was as if all the aggression was wiped away and he suddenly felt somewhat safe again. I stared at him with concern and sincerity because I didn't want him doing something he'd regret so slowly I held his arm so we could head the other direction back to my room. The atmosphere before the pair of us was awkward and uneasy; we shouldn't be confronted with such a thing at least not right now. If she came at a different time then maybe things would be different but here, right now in this moment of time it wasn't appropriate in a way it felt like torture. "Willow wait please. I just want to talk to you," Elyria called after me, I stopped where I was stopping Hayden in the process and looked round at her slightly where she appeared to have moved closer in front of Yvette and towards me looking more eager than she did before "Why should I talk to you?" I asked, maybe I didn't want to say it but at the same time it seemed like the right thing to say but possibly not the safest thing to say.

"You're my daughter, I want to get to know you," should that matter? It should I knew that deep down but something else was pulling me away from believing it to be true. I looked back at Hayden and he saw the communication in my eyes so shook his head "Don't go," I sighed heavily at him as I pulled away from him because I knew what my heart wanted, I knew what I wanted and I knew that I probably wouldn't get another chance like this. It was my turn to let head shake at him "I'm sorry, I have to," Hayden gave me his best frown ever but it didn't mean anything I wasn't going to stop from walking away from him. "Fine," he turned around and started following me "Then I'm coming with you," at first I raised my eyebrow at him wondering what he was doing but then my eyes widened and I held him back "No, no you're not. This is for me to do; you can deal with your vendetta afterwards okay. I get it your angry at her but please let me to talk her alone...she's my mother too," I don't think he could hold back the glare he gave towards me but it didn't take effect on me I just stared neutrally towards him until he understood I needed to do this alone. A final growl was heard from him before he paid one last glance towards our mother and walked in the opposite direction; I held the book firmly against me before looking on Elyria with an emotional gaze directing my head towards the room next to us. I pushed open the doors with my back and it appeared to be bright from the reflected sun shining through the windows.

The room seemed to have not been used in years as it appeared to be slightly dusty but it had old paintings hanging across all the walls and parts of the furniture were covered with sheets but it looked as if they hadn't been touched for centuries. It wasn't my part to question why, I had other matters on my hand. I walked towards a long cornered chair. I took a seat in the corner of the chair resting my back against its frame while Elyria took a distanced seat away from me still on the long chair. "You look so grown up," I smiled a little as she spoke not really knowing what to say it was hard to react just like I thought it would be "I thought you'd look like your father growing up...I guess I was wrong," I let off a little laugh with my smile brightening even more than it did "It's funny actually cause I find I'm nothing like him..." the I paused for a moment as a clench started to feel my chest and when I looked at her I could feel the glass of tears fill my eyes "Why did you let him take him?" her head raised seeing the tears inside my eyes as she took hold of my hands; her hands were proven to be soft and gentle sending a pulse of trust through me but that's when I felt a sudden flood of emotions translate through me and I knew the water element started to take effect. Holding Elyria's hand I realised she was feeling guilt, betrayal towards me and most of all melancholy because she understood she did wrong and now was trying to fix it.

"I didn't want to, I wanted to keep you but I didn't have a choice," I cut her off before she could go any further "Everyone has a choice!" My voice rose in a demand because I wanted her to see how much I was hurting like I knew how much she is hurting "We do now Willow but we didn't back then. It was different then Willow, we were disobedient growing up and we always did things our way not the right way because we didn't care about the world we were living in and what our roles meant. When Alesandro and Yvette got together nothing went wrong, well not at first so your father and I decided to do the same but no one found out about us. Then Yvette got pregnant with Liam and things started to fall apart, Alesandro wanted his own son dead because of the gift he had but Yvette saved him before that could happen without Alesandro being aware so as far as Alesandro know his is dead. Then everything calmed down, Yvette and Xira searched for more answers because they believed otherwise. Knowing what happened with Liam, your father and I separated for the best...that's when I had Hayden." It was making sense to me so far but everything that I'm hearing has been told before to me I didn't need to hear it again, I needed to know why she gave me away. "Being separated from each other didn't work, we couldn't stand to be apart so we took the risk and met back up in secret and then you happened. People were afraid because they knew what was going to happen or what might happen, I wasn't. From the moment I knew I was pregnant the relationship between James and I ended for good, he wasn't proud of what we did but he stayed with me through it all that was until you were born.

Sasha couldn't conceive, no one knew why and Ivna needed an heir for their kingdom so James didn't make a discussion about it he just took you. I didn't get a say in whether he took you or not and we argued for days on end. I fought to take you home with me, because you were mine and I couldn't live without my daughter. Willow you were the best thing that ever happened to me, from the moment you were born I loved you and having you ripped from my arms destroyed me, my first daughter was taken away from me. I never got to see you grow up, I never got to spend time with you, and I never got to see your first walk or your first word. It was something I always wanted to do with my daughter; I know what you're thinking I have a son I could have done all that with him but it wasn't the same, he bonded more with his father straight from the beginning but I never wanted a son I always wanted a daughter. I'm sorry Willow; I tried everything to keep you I didn't want to give you away. If I had a choice then I would have kept you but without even a blink James just took you." The tears were falling from my eyes; they were falling for a mix of reasons, half of the tears were falling for my sake but the other half were falling for Hayden's sake but holding Elyria's hand I knew everything she told me was the truth and with the final clarification for me to understand it was the truth was by the power of the water element.

Her hand made its way up to my cheek as she held on gently wiping away the tears that casually fell one by one. I sniffed a little holding back anymore tears wanting to fall. "I know you won't be able to forgive me and I know you probably won't ever see me as your mother but I hope one day you will," I couldn't help but find my way towards her as she wrapped her arms around me tightly. My head found its way to be buried into her chest as she rested her head down against me with love. Something I hadn't felt for a long time was a sense of belonging, being wrapped inside her arms I felt safer than I have in the past few weeks and it felt good. Her hand found itself running through my hair delicately as we remained in our position but it was suddenly disturbed due to the bang coming from the distance of the doors crashing open. My head lifted as right before my eyes was Hayden walking towards us "She's the best thing that ever happened to you, what about Amelia and I? Or have you forgotten her?" Suddenly a cut went through my stomach, Amelia...the girl I saw in my dream, the little girl murdered at the hands of Jayden the one I witnessed through an apparition. Hayden immediately locked onto the sorrow through my eyes as I did with him and I knew we both felt defeated at the thought of her. It made sense to me now, it made sense why I witnessed that the way I did it's because Amelia was my sister as well I could feel the family bond connected between the three of us and when they were in danger I reacted but it seems this time the reaction was many years too late. Snapping out from the distant memory I gained consciousness back on the scene before me. "I never forgot about her Hayden, I loved her very much," yet a laugh escaped Hayden something I don't think our mother was expecting but his laugh appeared very sarcastic which made the atmosphere in the room become incredibly tense.

"Did you? Did you love her or was she born out of guilt?" I watched Elyria's eyes slam themselves down on her son and strangely enough I watched her eyes change a florescent shade of purple just like when mine turn red or when Hayden's eyes turn yellow was that connected somehow? I think I missed part of the argument because I was fascinated in something I shouldn't be so when I come back into reality I noticed Elyria now stood in front of her son trying to comfort him but Hayden pushed her abruptly away from him "You lied to me! My whole life you lied to me! How can I accept that? Do you even know how bad all this comes across? You loved Willow from the moment she was born, not just because you always 'so said a daughter' but because you thought she was special so when she was taken away from you, you mourned and mourned but nothing would heal the hole in your heart so to make up for it you had Amelia but even that didn't work did it?" That's when I watched mother and son have a full blown argument with each other, it wasn't my fight but at the same time I felt as if it was. Most deeply the feeling creeping in was guilt and fault; this would never have happened if I wasn't the person always being stuck in the middle so I decided to walk away. It may have not been the best thing to do but I needed time to think for myself so with the book Xira gave me in hand I exited the room on my own accord without a reaction from the two arguing and made my way back to my room ready to read the book.

"Well wasn't that interesting to watch," the person I least expected to make an appearance decided to wake up in my head "What's up Liam?" as of right now I didn't mind that he decided to pop up in my head because for some reason I felt as if I needed a friend and all the emotions I felt for him after lying to me seemed to have disappeared so I didn't own a problem anymore. "How was it talking to your mother?" here's me hoping that wouldn't be the first question he'd ask but it appeared it was but I guess it's better to get straight to the point rather than sugar coating it "It wasn't bad but I still don't know how to feel about everything and as of right now I'm going to let her and Hayden figure out their issues with one another as I don't want to be a part of it," even though I still feel like I am. As I started to get closer to my room I suddenly felt a migraine take over my head; I groaned loud in annoyance and entered my room chucking the book I was holding onto the bed "So you really think the water element is trapped inside your ruby necklace?" Liam began to ask me but as he spoke it felt as if his voice was turned up in volume sending electric sparks all the way through my brain "Liam please tone it down," I clutched hold of my head hoping to settle the pain a little with my power but the effect did nothing. "Willow I'm talking normally, like I always have," the tone to Liam's voice as he was reaching the end of his sentence was beginning to sound concerning and I realised I didn't want a 'are you feeling okay?' lecture coming from him.

The pain however in my head started to die down randomly which I was thankful for so I settled on the idea that my power actually did do something it only took a while for it to kick in just like all medicines do. "To answer your question Liam, yes I do believe it is because it's the only possible thing that makes sense right now," I could feel the movement of him nodding his head inside my own head instead of a reply "Well let's hope your right and if you are then you'd better find it before Alesandro figures any of it out," all I did was nod back at him even though he couldn't exactly see it face to face I just didn't want to talk right now. It was getting late anyway and I wanted to start reading this book Xira gave me to learn more about Ziva and why Xira couldn't restore her memories. I wandered over towards my desk opening the drawers to find a feathered ink pen followed by the little pot of ink and piles of parchment so I could write notes on what the book would talk about because I knew Xira would want the book back in its hiding place quite soon. As I looked down and scrambled for the paper sudden little droplets of blood started to fall one by one down onto the parchment then onto my skin. Perplexity took over me as I looked at what was happening but the curiosity was in play as I wondered where the blood was coming from. "Willow?" Liam started questioning the same thing I was seeing; my gaze lifted itself and I stared at my reflection in the mirror only to see a small trail a blood coming out from my nose. I rubbed it away but it didn't matter because it only started to fall from my nose again so I wiped it away again walking away from the mirror but it didn't matter because within seconds everything went black and the last thing I felt was my body collapsing to the ground.

"Willow!!"