"I'm not insane. I'm just more different from you, is all." Why doesn't she understand? I'm not insane.

Matter of fact. I'm inside of sane.

Make sense? No? How disappointing. Maybe you'll understand one day, (Y/N), when you get here.

It's a peaceful, but yet, an annoying place to be.

When I finally got out of the hospital, my stepmother seemed to be more quiet than usual. I decided to break the silence.

"So. What now?" I asked, not even looking at her as I look out the window. "Well," she spoke softly.

"I'm going to watch after you more."

"Why? I'm almost 18, I can handle myself." I roll my eyes, annoyed but touched by her affection.

"You're unstable, (Y/N). They told me to not leave you alone." She tells me, her eyes still on the road.

Ugh. How her caring self makes me sick. Yet, it's warming. My heart is too broken to show her my love.

Do I even know how to love? Who defines love? What is it anyway?

Why do I have to show this emotion to others? The old me knew, the new me, nah. Doesn't know shit.

I can fake it to make it for you, but never will you receive my real love –unless you're special.

Like Mal. Mal is my favorite, even if he doesn't really pay me any mind.

"(Y/N), hello! Answer my question!" She shouts. Whoops. I zoned out again.

"Um. What was it?" I ask. She sighs, annoyance in her tone already. "I asked if you wanted to see a therapist. Do you?" She glances over at me.

I mentally laugh at her joke.

Haha –she must be joking!? Oh?

Her face says otherwise. Shit. "Sure. Wouldn't hurt to try." I mumble, staring out the window to catch a glimpse of myself.

My (E/C) eyes were so dull, the bags under them made me look so tired —which I was. Then my naturally tangled (H/C) made me look like a bum.

I was. Haha. A natural bum.

"Okay then, I'll schedule one tomorrow." She tells me. Ugh. Why tomorrow? Don't we have to go see my stepdad?

"Such a waste of time." I accidentally slip out in a mumble, resting my balled up fist against my cheek, my elbow resting on the edge of the armrest on the door.

"Excuse me?" She said in a questioning tone.

Oops. I better answer honestly before I get my ass whooped. "I was talking about our trip to see your husband. He doesn't like me, and vis versa." I tell her.

She sighs. " He loves you, you're just... Hard to understand." She admits.

I don't even understand myself. I'm still learning things about myself that not even I know about –and that's scary.

I'm just different is all. I like weird people, not you norms. I mentally roll my eyes as I'm dozing off in the seat.

A loud buzzing fills my head, making my skull throb. Maybe if I ignore the pain...

Ugh... Go away...

"I'll never go away until everyone you 'love' is gone." My demon tells me.

Great. Then I can die in peace, or heart break.

My demon growls. It wanted me to hurt, but all I feel is the numbness. It's quiet nice. Taking peace in the silence is best to do in the middle of chaos. Why? It diverts more chaos. Duh.

I closed my eyes for one split second, and the sound of tires squealing catch my attention. A blinding light reaches through my closed eyelids, making me try to close my already closed eyes.

Augh!

The sound of glass breaking and a rough jerk from my body made me finally realize what had happened.

Ah damn it.