✧ Chapter 64 ✧
[ I Knew I Already Lost ]
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[ Shuichi's PoV ]

I fell to the soft green grass, my arms and legs shaking from fatigue and weariness. The body I held in my arms was cold, fragile as an injured bird yet unmoving like an inanimate object.

I didn't want to let him go..

I couldn't remember escaping from the Hospital, but I do recall someone grabbing my arm and throwing me off the side of the building as I held Ouma close to me.

And that person who saved me looked suspiciously like Keebo, who regarded me with a pained expression as the both Ouma and I fell. His eyes met mine with the same expression as someone who knew they were about to die.

I couldn't save Keebo, just as I couldn't save Kokichi. We had then landed on the tarp which was designed to break our fall.. and that was all I could remember..

I couldn't focus on anything else besides Kokichi resting, sleeping forever in my shaking arms.

A shadow blotted out the sun beaming on his pale face, making me look up.

The shadowed figure held out a hand. Behind them, the broken building of the Hospital lay in ruins, as both Remnants and Traitors stood together uncertainly.

The sun was shining behind the person before me, obscuring their features from me. It reminded me of the day Ouma woke me up for class, the brilliant blinding sun behind him and his wide smile greeting me.

I turned my gaze down, to the outstretched hand. The person held a golden vial of liquid in their hand and a shock of familiarity stuck me.

The Revival Serum..

"But.." I finally found my voice, "How?"

The figure smiled slightly, "Kamukura gave it to me in his final moments.. it appears that you recognise it."

A voice at the back of my mind made me pause. I couldn't hear why they were saying.. but something told me to stop. It was as gentle as a summer breeze, but I could hear the urgency in its tone, telling me not to take the vial..

This was my chance to revive Kokichi.. why should I waste such a choice? He was.. everything to me, wasn't he?

Ignoring the voice at the back of my mind, I took the vial with shaking hands as the person held out a syringe with his other hand. I didn't care about the other voices around me, I just wanted to save Kokichi..

Drawing the golden serum from its vial, I nervously inserted the needle into the vein of Ouma's arm, pressing the plunger down without hesitance.

-

And so, I waited..

And my gaze wandered around the courtyard at my schoolmates.

The person who handed the vial to me was none other than Hajime, who walked back to his friends, Nagito and Chiaki.. the trio seemed to be whispering amongst themselves, glancing over at the other students from time to time.

Kirumi and a few others were tending to the injured, while Komaru and Makoto hugged one another.. in fact, everyone seemed to be free from Junko's brainwashing..

Which meant..

Still holding Kokichi in my arms, I looked around to see Kaito, his back facing the group with his arms folded. He didn't seem to be in the mood to talk to anyone.

... I was hoping he'd come over to talk, but he seemed to be too busy in his own thoughts. After all, he did.. kill her. And I doubted he would ever recover from killing his own lover.

Maki Harukawa.. she distracted Junko till the last possible moment to buy me some time to free Ouma and give us all enough time to escape the crumbling building.

Chihiro and Ishimaru were nowhere to be seen, though I knew they had made it out safely. They wouldn't go down so easily.

I closed my eyes, breathing in the air and for once in a long time.. I felt safe. Junko was gone, the Hospital was too. It was too quick of a battle, but one I was grateful for nevertheless. There was no need for more casualties.

A small movement in my arms caught my attention, making me look at.. him..

...

"Why.. hello beautiful." Kokichi murmured, smiling sleepily up at me. "To what do I owe this pleasure to seeing your face this early in the morning?"

"..." I went silent, before breaking into a smile. "You.. you scared me.." I couldn't help but feel relieved, angry and happy all at the same time. "I thought the serum didn't work.."

Kokichi shifted his head, closing his eyes for a moment. "And I thought you were a tsundere.. it's fun being dead. It's like sleeping forever.."

I could actually feel my hands shaking from the realisation that he was here. Awake and alive in my arms. Tears started to cloud my vision but I struggled to hold them back.

"Wait.." I paused, my voice as steady as I could manage, "Your memories.. how much do you remember-?"

"Basically everything.." he sounded ashamed, reaching up to take a strand of his hair and staring listlessly at it, "Before making the Serums, us meeting at the park, and.. it's all wrong.."

"I need you to do me a favour..would you?" he continued, "This world is ruined.. and we can't repair it, no matter how much we try. Understand?"

With a small wince, he sat up, kneeling in front of me. We knelt together, my hands wanting to take his but I still hesitated.

What was he trying to say? I don't understand.. or maybe I understood, but just didn't want to accept whatever plan he was suggesting.

Kokichi fixed me with an expression of seriousness, his eyes looking right into mine.

"Look around you, our friends are dead because of us. Countless, nameless people have lost their lives because of our selfishness. I may be an evil leader but this isn't right.."

"I have the knowledge of all three serums.. it's your choice-."

"But I don't want to lose you again!" I interrupted him, my heart beating wildly. No.. I cant believe he was suggesting something so.. so absurd!

"But this isn't right Saihara-chan.." he replied, shifting his gaze to stare at the group of people behind us, "I know you think this is crazy, but with the Reverse serum and a few modifications to it.. we can erase everyone's memories of this loveless world."

"You don't understand.." I refused to look away from him, my eyes watering. "I cant lose you again.. everything I've done was for you-."

Kokichi placed a finger against my lips, smiling, "Everything we've done is wrong; and I believe in soulmates, don't you?" he laughed softly, "Such a strange concept of two people always ending up together.. isn't it?"

I held back my tears, as he slowly removed his finger from my lips, "I just got you back.. can't we spend more time together?"

"There's always time afterwards.. now," he stood up, looking slightly worse for wear. But he carried himself with the confidence of someone who realised he could change the world.

Looking down at me and holding out a hand; I had never seen a more serious expression than ever. His purple hair waved in the wind, and his eyes shining.

"Come along Saihara-chan.. let's end this with one final serum.."

And my hand reached out to take his.

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[ Outside the ruins of the Hospital ]

"Here's the last box of things." Himiko placed down the box of colourless vials and bottles of pills. The mage had the side of her hair straightened and the other curly due to the humidity of the air.

She was upset as well.. since.. Tenko didn't make it out alive.. her emotionless expression told me so and so did Kirigiri, who had been naming a few people who had lost their lives to the battle.

"Is there anything else you two need?"

Kokichi gave her a small smile, obviously trying to lift the girl's spirits, "Thanks magic girl.. sorry about Tenko.."

"Nyeh.." the girl sniffled, rubbing the side of her face, "It's alright.. I understand.. you know, Kokichi.. you're much better now that you're not lying so much.."

"Ni-hehe~!" Kokichi sniggered, his eyes shining with enthusiasm, "Who says I was telling the truth? Now shoo." He was obviously teasing, since Himiko just rolled her eyes and walked away.

As soon as the girl walked away, Ouma's shoulders slumped. "See what I mean?" he continued, unpacking the different coloured glasses from the boxes; handing a vial of green liquid to me.

"So many people's lives were lost.. it's not Junko's fault. Nor Izuru's. It's probably mine.. since I've got such a great brain.."

"Don't beat yourself up.." I replied immediately, balancing the carton of medicine on a slab of concrete. "It's my fault too.. I wanted to destroy this world because I couldn't have you."

"Like I said," he smirked and reached over and tapped my forehead with a glass bottle, "Soulmates. We've gone through, what, at least three lives together and we're still a couple." His face was slightly pink, though I didn't know why.

"We- wait," I could feel my face heat up, "We're a couple? Since when?"

Kokichi shot me a devilish grin, the light in his eyes dancing with mischief, "Oh, whoopsies, did I forget to mention?" he hummed a song to himself and tossed a bottle to me; which bounced off my chest and I caught with some difficulty before it hit the floor.

"Ouma-kun, what do you mean we're a couple?" I demanded, my face still warm with embarrassment. "I didn't ask you-."

"I meannn," he interrupted me, empathising the word, 'mean'. He then skipped around the box which was in between us so he was standing in front of me. "Do you wanna be my boyfriend? At least, for this short time we have left?"

"..."

I swallowed, feeling a lump in my throat form as I chuckled, "You're kidding.."

"I never kid about asking someone out, my dear Saihara-chan," he winked cheekily, before turning back to face the box of medicine, "Just because I asked you out, doesn't mean you have to accept you know.."

"Of course I want to be your boyfriend, Ouma!" I exclaimed, my face burning with happiness and also more embarrassment. He still didn't face me; even as my hands felt cold and clammy from my confession.

"All.. all that time at that Hospital.." I continued, "I.. can't say what I want to say to you in person because you make me speechless.."

Kokichi had froze, his hand holding a small green bottle.

"I never know what you're thinking because you're such a mysterious person and I love you for that.. there's so many things I want to say-."

"Then don't say.." he laughed slightly, placing the bottle down but still didn't look at me; making me reach out and take hold of his arm. At the touch, he spun around, his eyes shining with unshed tears.

I then leaned down to press his lips against mine. It wasn't like our first kiss, the hasty, fearful one. This kiss was perfect, slow and we didn't have to rush. No one was around to interrupt us, or to make us break away suddenly.

"..."

I could feel his rapid pulse as my eyes shut tight. He tasted like grapes, though I didn't know why. Perhaps it was the grape Panta.

I only opened my eyes when we had to catch our breath, the tears he had held back was now tracing his skin.

"You.. you have no idea how long I've waited for you to kiss me, Mister Detective.." he chuckled shakily, as I brushed a strand of hair away from his flushed face.

I.. didn't want to lose him again.. but I had no choice.

I had to believe we would end up together in the end..

Kokichi reaches up and took my wrist, smiling an expression he didn't usually wear; gentleness. He was many things. Sarcastic, lying and playful. But to see his more passive side made me wonder how well could he keep his true feelings.

Turning away to mask the fact that I had been staring at him, I picked up a glass vial of purple liquid, "I think this is all we need, don't we?"

Kokichi nodded, rubbing his cheek again and in his hands he held a vial of amber liquid.

"All we have to do is to mix it and create a serum which can remove memories.. but maybe not a immediate effect though. Perhaps we can modify it so it reacts to specific time. That way, everyone can fall asleep and start a new day with their memories wiped."

"It's a bit weird isn't it.." I muttered, feeling the taste of grapes in my mouth lingering and the warmness of his lips, "We.. we would have to create enough serums to help the whole world-."

"Not exactly.. it's just Dangan Island.. this Loveless Project only started here, and no where else.. fabricated memories are my specialty after all."

"Wait, you're saying that.. the rest of the world are fine?" I asked, feeling relieved when he nodded.

"Pretty much.. now, let's continue, and make this serum. And for the record.." he gave me a sly smirk, "You're a horrible kisser, but then again, that's probably a lie."

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[ ??? 's PoV ]

He stood at the edge of the building with Kokichi in his arms. Shuichi looked like he was about to collapse any moment, his body swayed unsteadily and his arms shook.

I knew he was dead.. but I couldn't stand to see Shuichi give up so easily..

Struggling to stand, I used the wall to help me move along. Behind me, I could hear someone.. calling for me. But I ignored the voice for now, wanting to help the last of my friends.

With my remaining strength, I fell forward and pushed Shuichi and Kokichi off the building.

The both of them fell off, as I dropped to the floor, my hands now scraped raw from the rough, concrete ground.

The pain from the gunshot wound earlier was coming back again.. too painful for me to drag myself out of here, yet I couldn't die from it..

Does this mean I had to kill myself? Just to end the pain? I couldn't bring myself to do such a thing.. suicide.. was never on my mind. I had so much to live for. My list of things I needed to accomplish. I wanted to keep going..

A pale, translucent-ish shadow appeared from behind me, making me raise my head and turn just the slightest to see... her again.

How could I ever forget her small arrogant smile or the habit she has whenever she pulled at the goggles nestled on her hair..

"Hey.." I whispered as loudly as I could, shifting to lie on my back; trying to ease the pain. "It's.. nice to see you again.."

"You too, you beautiful nerd.." Miu knelt beside me as I pushed up my glasses, which were spiderwebbed with cracks so I could barely see her. "You saved them.."

I rested my head against the stone underneath me, half closing my eyes, "How.. are you here?"

Miu's smug expression looked down at me as I felt her hand hovering slightly against my cheek, but not touching me, "Let's just say.. that the Neo World Program you built brought me back.."

Of course..

I gave her a smile, trying to hold her hand but of course, she was just a program. A projection of what I desired most.

"Thank you.. for being here with me, Miu."

"..."

"I love you too.. you beautiful nerd.."

♥ End of Chapter Sixty-Four ♥