We see absolutely nothing until we hear a voice.

Cloud... Hey, Cloud.

Cloud: Am... am I dead?

Well, that all depends on your perspective.

Cloud: Oh God... I AM dead!

Well no... but we're all dying if you think about it.

Cloud: But am I dead right this second?!

Nah... Now get up, dumbass.

Cloud: OH THANK GOwawwha-?

Wake up, dumbass.

Cloud: What?!

I said-

We see F/N bitch slap cloud to wake up with a girl with brown hair next to him.

F/N: -wake up, dumbass!

Girl: Goodness! He didn't deserve to be slapped like that.

F/N: Oh trust me, that was just going easy on him. He deserves far worse than that.

Cloud: (Groans in pain) Oh. Oh, god.

F/N: Oh good, sleeping beauty's awake.

Cloud: Ohhh... My face hurts and I feel like I got hit by a car.

Girl: Cars are for the road, silly! You and your friend fell through the roof! But don't worry, my flowers cushioned your fall.

Cloud: (coughs blood) No, they didn't.

F/N:And for your face (grabs some rum) that was from me bitch slapping you to wake up. (Drinks some rum)

The girl looks at the two as they get up.

Girl: Hmm, you two look familiar.

F/N: Not sure I know you. (Looks at Cloud) What about you?

Rewinds back after Cloud got ditched. We see the girl selling some flowers as Cloud was pissed.

Girl: Flowers! (Sees Cloud and walks up to him) Oh, you, blond sir! (Cloud: God damnit, every fucking time I...)

Cloud: GO FUCK YOURSELF!

Back in the present with the three together.

F/N: Wow, Dude. You told this nice girl to go fuck herself?

Cloud: Well I was angry when you guys ditched me!

F/N: And we wouldn't have ditched you if you wouldn't have fucked up on an easy task.

Cloud: Anyways, I'm sorry about that.

Girl: Well, all is forgiven!

Cloud: Seriously?

Girl: Of course! You apologized, so I must forgive you.

F/N: Well waddaya know. Someone's willing to put up with you.

Cloud: Go fuck yourself, man.

Girl: So.....

Cloud/F/N: So....?

Girl: What's your names? Is it Starbreeze and Moonshine? I bet it is, since you two fell from the sky!

Cloud: Uh, actually, it's... Cloud.

F/N: And my name isn't Moonshine, it's F/N. Though some moonshine does sound good right now.

Girl: (gasps) those are some beautiful names! My name is...

We see a menu with the girl's face on it next to a name that says "Aeris" on it. You got rid of the "s" and replaced it with a "th" to make "Aerith" until you decided to change it back to "Aeris" then you changed your mind and went back with "Aerith" and kept doing it over and over again until you decided to go with "Aerith" then pressed enter as the game continued on as you got an achievement that says "Make Up Your Damn Mind!"

Aerith: Aerith. So, Mr.Cloud and Mr.F/N, what were you two doing up in the sky?

Cloud: Oh, we were, uh... (Shows a glimpse of Cloud and F/N falling as Cloud was screaming) skydiving... with our... (Shows a flashback of Barrett trying to kill Cloud, then a flashback of Tifa threatening to shove her fist up his ass, and finally a flashback of F/N punching Cloud in the dick) .... Friends.

F/N: Yeah, let's go with that.

Aerith: Ooh, you guys have friends! That's amazing! Aren't friends the best?

Cloud:Oh, they are, they are... fantastic. I... love... them?

F/N: Meh, they're alright.

Aerith: I wonder where they are. They must be so worried about you two!

Back at the bar

Barrett: Welp, I guess Cloud's dead! Guess we all owe Biggs ten bucks.

Biggs: Yes! [Ahaha!]

Marlene: But what about uncle F/N?

Barrett: I'm sure he's fine sweetie. Knowing him, he's probably walking it off with a bottle of rum as we speak.

Back with the three.

Cloud: What can I say? It, uh... pays to have friends.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y03Ygfqdi1M

We see the three talking as someone with red hair walks towards them.

Aerith: So, do you two want to come to my house and meet my mom?

Cloud: OK, so, uh, listen. While I appreciate you watching me sleep in your... Church flowerbed... We really gotta get going.

F/N: Yeah, (puts away his rum) we got some... business to take care of.

Aerith: Oh, really? But you guys won't meet my friend!

Cloud: Oh, l-like what F/N said, we've got some business to take care of, and I'm not sure we have the... fortitude? For one of your friends.

Aerith: Wow! I love building forts! Maybe Mr. Reno likes building forts too!

F/N: Wait, Reno?

Aerith: (looks at the red headed male along with Cloud and F/N) Hi, Mr. Reno! Do you like building forts?

Reno: [Urgh] Way too early for this... Hello, Aerith... [Heh] Remember what we discussed regarding your house?

Aerith: To never leave it!

Reno: And where are you right now?

Aerith: [nervously laughs] I'm in the church...

Reno: Aha, that's right! Looks like we're gonna have to take you back!

Aerith: Aww, you're such a responsible person!

F/N: (Is she serious right now?)

Reno: (getting angry) Well I have to be when you keep BREAKING THE FUCKIN' RULES!

Aerith: And so assertive!

F/N: Okay, (walks in front of Cloud and Aerith) this shit is usually none of my business, but this is where I draw the damn line.

Cloud: (walks next to F/N) Yeah, why don't ya... Why don't ya quit harassing the girl?

Reno: hey, hey fellas, why don't you two shut the fuck up and mind your own goddamn business?

Aerith: Oh, you guys are friends?

Reno: Oh ho ho ho! They wished that they were my friend.

F/N: Yeah right, I'd rather get my foot ran over by a truck multiple times than be his friend.

Cloud: Plus I'm good. I got enough ambiguous-looking friends.

Reno: Oh. Is your friend a mirror?

Cloud: I, eh-- n... no.

Reno: Ah! You paused! (Looks at F/N) And what about you, drunktard? Is your friend a bottle of beer?

F/N: No, actually my friend is your mom. We're really good friends, (zooms in on him) with benefits.

Reno: You son of a-! [Inhales really loudly] You know what, speaking of friends.. (A bunch of SOLDIER thugs walk in) Meet mine. So listen, fellas, if you don't-

Thug 1: Hey, are those flowers?

Reno: (looks at the thug) HEY! Did Rude send you to interrupt me!?

Thug 2: No, sir! His orders were to, uh...

Reno: Uh, WHAT?

Thug 2: ... Babysit, sir.

Reno: (enraged) BABYSIT??!

Thug 2: Yes, sir! After the... incident with the falafel stand, it has been deemed necessary that you are accompanied at all times.

Reno: (annoyed) Seriously, I jumped over...

As they went on we see Cloud, Aerith, and F/N.

F/N: You know what, Aerith, let's go see your mom.

Aerith: (Gasp) Really?

Cloud: (runs off with Aerith);Yeah, let's go right now! Come on F/N!

F/N: (Brings out a piece of paper and a pen) You guys go ahead, I'll catch up. (Starts writing) I'm gonna leave them something.

Aerith: Yay! Let's go the special way!

Cloud: Yeah, uh, uh... Special way?

F/N: (joins them) Alright, done. Lets go.

Then we see them in a high place in the in the church.

Cloud: Uuuugh...

Aerith: What's wrong, Mr. Cloud?

F/N: (walks forward as everyone follows) He's afraid of hights.

Aerith: Oh! And we're really high up.

Cloud: aaaaaAHHHH...

Then we see Reno and his thugs talking to each other as Cloud trips and struggles to get back up.

Reno: So what you're saying is... Because of the awful falafel... (Cloud: Come on, pull me up! Pull me uuuup! F/N: (pulls him up) Fucking pussy)... I became unlawfully awful.

Thug 2: Yes, sir. That's.. exactly i-

Thug 1: WORDPLAY!

Reno: Wow, guys. I really need to think about how I come across to people. (Walks off) Just... gotta be with myself for a minute... (Runs in mad) WHERE THE FUCK DID THEY GO?!?

Thug 3: (sees a paper with Reno's name on it on a seat) Sir, there's a folded up piece of paper with your name on it.

Reno: (Walks towards it and grabs it) Lemme see that! (Opens it up) "Dear Reno, So long fuckwad! P.S. Say hi to your mother for me." (Rips up the paper) WHY THAT MO-

Aerith: -ooom! We're baaack!

Elmyra: (Airily) Oh, my earthly angel! You've returned to our spiritual garden! I was sensing your life energy as you entered.

Cloud: Welp. It all makes sense now.

F/N: Yep.

Elmyra: And who are your friends? The blonde girl is quite beautiful. And the (H/N) one is handsome.

F/N: Ha!

Cloud: Uh... (ahem) A-Actually, I'm a guy.

Elmyra: (dreamily) And I'm an oak tree! Spreading my roots and nurturing the lifestream...

F/N: Are you high or something?

Elmyra: Why yes I am. Thanks to the flower tops from my garden.

F/N: "Flower Tops"? That's another name for marijuana. You got weed here?

Elmyra: Indeed I do.

F/N: ... Bitch you are my new best friend! (Runs off to look for some weed) Where do you keep the good shit at? I need some after the day I've had today.

Elmyra: Down the hall, 5th door on the left.

Cloud: O-K, so it was VERY nice meeting you, Aerith, and you as well... ma'am, buuuut F/N and I should be going.

Aerith: Already? Aww, but mom was going to make dinner!

Elmyra: Orange peels with a side of rutabaga leaves!

Cloud: (forced) Mm-mmm! Tempting...

Aerith: We always invite Me. Reno, but he says his Turk blank-hole bosses never give him a day off and should get off his blanking blank.

F/N: alright I'm back. What did I miss?

Cloud: Reno works for the Turks?

F/N: Wait, really?

Elmyra: Oh, yeees! My darling angel is so special! They always keep an eye on her. One time I was meditating in my crystal garden, they kicked down the door. They were so worried about her whereabouts that they started breaking everything we owned...

Aerith: Even your magic smoke case, right mom?

F/N: They did what?!

Elmyra: Yes, even my vaporal gateway to Shilva's garden.

Cloud: Aaaannnd the Turks work for Shinra.

F/N: Those bastards! I knew there was a reason why I hated that red head fucker.

Then we see cloud running while he and F/N kept saying fuck.

Cloud/F/N: Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! (Sees Aerith in front of them.)

Cloud: Wuh, whoa, hey! Hi?

Aerith: Hey, Mr. Cloud and Mr. F/N!

F/N: What the he- how did you-?

Aerith: (Sing-song) It's a secret...

Cloud: Really?! You didn't just use fairy dust to fly here?!

Aerith: You believe in fairies too??

F/N:... Oh yeah, she's special alright.

Cloud: So yeah, we're going!

Aerith: Are you two going to YOUR house?

Cloud: I... Don't have a house.

F/N: I do though.

Aerith: (Gasp) Then let's find you a house, Mr. Cloud!! (Runs off)

Cloud: Oh, wait, nononononononono! I feel like I'm losing control of my life.

F/N: Oh it can't be that bad. Who knows? Maybe she'll actually find you a-

Aerith: IT'S PERFECT!!!!

F/N: PpppfffHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Cloud: Yaaaay... it's got everything a livable house needs... A sandbox.... A ladder... (Climbs up to the top) aaaaand a slide. The basic amenities.

F/N: (Leans on the side of it)  I mean it fits you perfectly. (Takes out a bottle of beer and drinks it.)

Aerith: Sooo... Do you two do skydiving for a living?

Cloud: Oh, heh. No, we actually use to be members of SOLDIER.

Aerith: Oh really? What class?

F/N: (stop drinking) I use to be first class...

Cloud: Oh, you know about that? And I was a....

First class

Cloud: ... First class.

Aerith: Wow, that's really cool. I used to date someone in SOLDIER.

Cloud: Oh, seriously? Who was it? Maybe we might know him.

Aerith: His name was...

Cloud: (gets up) Whoa whoa whoa whoa! Hold that thought! Tifa?!

We see Tifa pass by in a carriage dressed in a sexy dress.

F/N: (Goes around) Holy shit that is Tifa!

Aerith: Tifa? Do you two know her?

Cloud: Yeah, that's our friend!

Aerith: Oh! Your friend... Is a girl. How quaint... Let's go meet her! (Goes after her.)

F/N: Am I sensing some hostility? (Goes with her.)

Cloud: WAIT! Oh nononono, I've, uh... Yep. Yep. I have lost control of my life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkRBi0y8P-Q

(A/N: Aaaaand done! Well what did you think? What was your favorite part? Let me know in the comments. And be sure to strike that vote button with thunder so others can see this book and I'll see you guys in the next episode!)