" I never lie", I said offhand. "At least not to those I don't love". (Anne Rice)

Nour's POV

I exhaled a sigh of relief as I opened the front door. England's weather is bad enough in winter, but try spending the whole night outside: I swear my balls are about to fall off. I start heading towards the kitchen with the sole intention of grabbing a cup of tea and then locking myself in my bedroom for a couple of hours but of course, Life is a sucker for drama. As soon as I open the kitchen door, three pairs of suspicious eyes are on me.

"Where have you been this time? What have you done, Nour?"

Meet Amine, my older brother and a figurative pain in my fine ass. He looks like me, dark eyes, brown skin, long legs, curly hair, except he is a bit taller than me and actually a good guy. Ask anyone: you have to be a bit of an angel to bear with me for so many years. Not that he likes me very much, but he is good at pretending, which is a common trait among nice people.

"I asked you a question. What. Have. You. Done. This. Time?"

A painful memory flashes in front of my eyes but I quickly put my casual mask back in place, before any of them can notice the change in my expression.

"You should be asking: who have you done this time?" I snicker.

"Erk - TMI, Nour, TMI" exclaims the virgin guy sitting next to my brother and currently enjoying a very big glass of orange juice.

I roll my eyes; I swear this guy is such a child. I can't believe he is almost 22.

"You should really start working on broadening your lexical knowledge, Matthias. Even my four years old niece can make proper sentences".

"I would like to remind you that English isn't my first language, espèce d'abruti*" he retorts, clearly offended. "At least I speak French AND English. How many languages do you speak, already? Oh, I'm sorry, is that zero?"

"Clearly someone is also struggling with mathematics" I comment, grabbing a cup and pouring boiling water in it.

"Laisse-tomber, Matthias. Il n'en vaut pas la peine**"

I can't help but quickly glance at the one who just spoke with such a bored tone: Rémy, my third housemate. He is Matthias's older brother and Amine's best friend. I have to admit, he overshadows the rest of us completely; compared to him Amine, Matthias and I are mere humans (well, I'm not entirely human but you see what I mean). He is half Vietnamese and half French, resulting in him having high cheekbones, pale skin, very dark hair and black amond-shaped eyes. He is about my size, with slightly broader shoulders. They are my favorite part on men.

I'm not into him but somehow I can't help starring at him. He never stares back, though. I wish he would hate me, anything but this cold indifference.  I've tried as hard as I could to make him hate me but to no avail; he always remains completely unaffected. He is a bit cold, but at least he smiles and seems to have genuine affection for his little brother and for my own brother.

Actually, he can be very sweet with his brother. He pretends to be annoyed with Matthias's dorkiness but then he smiles fondly or ruffles his hair. I wish Amine would do the same thing to me - ah, it's a joke, obviously. Only children enjoy that kind of treatment. They are actually quite close. Sometimes they just sit in the kitchen and talk for ages. Amine and I haven't done this kind of things in years - but it doesn't matter, it's just a waste of time. Life shoud not be spend indoors.

"Are you going to stay and have a cup of tea with us?" Amine cautiously asks, staring at me with a neutral expression, but I can see the glint of hope in the eyes of my older brother. He is not trying as hard as he used to in the beginning, just after mum's death, but from time to time he still tries to reach me. It's so hard, because even after all of those years I still find myself craving for his affection. I can't allow myself to be this weak, though. That wouldn't be fair to Amine, or to anyone else for that matter. They don't know half of the story.

"Nah, I'm actually gonna make a couple of phone calls - to people I actually care about."

It makes Matthias snort. "As if you could actually care about something or someone other than yourself, Nour."

"What's wrong with you today, Matthy? I find you even more unbearable than your usual self."

"That's because he had his hips operated on today, you heartless asshole," my brother hissed, all trace of friendliness gone, "did you actually forget?"

"Ooops, of course I did"- Of course I didn't! I actually called the clinic a few hours ago and they told me Matthias had already left. Contrary to what you guys think, I have a life. So I must confess, it slipped my mind. No biggie, though, how was it Matthias? Did you shat yourself?"

"GET OUT" Rémy suddenly yells; I never knew he could be so intimidating. I mean, I know I'm still one hundred times more dangerous than the strongest human on earth, but still.

"Okay, okay" I laugh, "I get it, no teasing the golden little brother. I will be in my bedroom, if you miss me too much."

I exit the kitchen and start climbing the stairs leading to my bedroom but I change my mind. Instead, I carefully walk back toward the now closed door of the kitchen.

"What's wrong with him? He is freaking me out. I mean, no offense Amine but I can't understand how you two can be related! He is the biggest asshole I have ever met! You said that we would only have to live with him for a couple of months, but now it's been almost a year!"

"I agree" Rémy adds. "He is not our friend, and he is no longer a brother to you. I hate to say that, because I want to believe everyone has a good side, but there is nothing I like in him. I just keep ignoring him, because the little brat can't stand not being the center of everyone's attention."

I turn around and quickly climb up the four stairs leading to my bedroom. Not wanting them to know I was eavesdropping, I do my best not to slam my door and let myself fall face first on my bed. I'm freaking him out! That's what Matthias-the-puppy said. I let out a humorless laugh and start softly singing my own little song, the one that I've been singing to myself for many years: " People say the freak is freaking them out/ But little do they know/ That upon seeing his own reflection/ the freak himself is freaking out/ The freak himself is freaking out."

Why is the pillow so wet? Ignorants say it's because Nour has wept. But Nour knows that it's just sweat.

*Translation: Espèce d'abruti = idiot

** Translation: Drop it, Matthias. He is not worth it.

A/N: I will do my best to update this story every SUNDAY. Don't hesitate to give me some feedback: sometimes I feel lazy or insecure about my writing, but then some people actually take the time to share their thoughts and ... BAM, I'M BACK!

~ English isn't my first language so go go go, point out those deadly grammatical mistakes please <3

Anyways, I wish you all a Glorious Sunday.

Until next time,

xoxoxo

#hasnoshame