Barton Home, USA

Fall 2015

If Nadine was being completely honest with herself, she was struggling a bit. Not in any real, serious way, which was actually a bit of a novelty, but it was still unsettling.

When she had been in training, free time had been a distant dream. A luxury they had never known in the Red Room. They'd had illusions of it, but in reality every waking moment had been bent toward a purpose. Their 'free time' should have more accurately been called 'free study' given the expectation that they use the time for activities that contributed to their training in some way; studying popular magazines and books to acclimatize them to places where they might be called on to blend in; activities involving memory games, logic puzzles and the like intended to exercise and strengthen their minds; reading books assigned by Madame B or one of their other instructors. Activities in that vein. Nothing that was leisure purely for leisure's sake. While incidentally enjoyable for the most part, none of it was intended for enjoyment.

But now? She wasn't a young recruit anymore. Why shouldn't she be allowed some down time? The past few weeks really had been productive, after all. Training had been going quite well, their new team members coming along quite nicely under Natasha's near unforgiving drive and Nadine's exacting eye. Nicely enough that Rhodey and Sam were both effectively 'done' training, so to speak, and only really needed to show up for the teambuilding exercises and the odd small mission Steve and Nat had needed the support on that the younger members weren't quite ready for.

Nadine had even been on another—successful, thank you—mission of her own, taking care of another significant chunk of her threat list. Only three from that list had needed more permanent precautions enacted to ensure their silence, and two of the other names had led her to another HYDRA head's intelligence stash, which she had promptly copied and destroyed. All in all, it meant that Nadine was feeling rather satisfied with her progress on that front.

And on the front of her other search? A little less productive, admittedly, but she was fairly sure she was making some headway. She was pretty certain she had Barnes' route mapped from the day he left DC up until about two weeks after she suspected he'd reached Europe, hitting a few roadblocks in Georgia. It was further than she knew she would've gotten in the same amount of time without the Avengers' unmatched resources, but it was still frustrating.

For the most part, though, she'd stuck pretty close to home. And the Compound had, bewilderingly enough, begun to feel like home. Not that she'd admitted as much to anyone, yet. She'd barely even admitted it to herself. But she'd breathe an inadvertent sigh of relief whenever she returned there, and it almost felt like she walked a little lighter, a little more comfortably through the halls of the Avengers' Facility than she had even in her and Nina's little apartment in Vienna, or their place in Hamburg before that. She had nearly managed to convince herself that it was simply an unconscious reaction to the top-notch security of the facility and the presence of the Avengers; that she could relax simply because she didn't have to be on her guard all the time there. Not to mention that it was where her family was; just knowing her daughter and her sister were close by was reassuring to say the least.

But comfortable as she had become at the facility, and welcomed as she'd felt, she had yet to be idle. Every minute had been bent to a purpose, much as it had all those years ago. Some masqueraded as moments of leisure—her time with Nina in the evenings, for instance, were often bent toward studying or working toward strengthening their fragile relationship—but Nadine had always been doing something that counted as productive.

Not like now. Not like the break they had taken from training at the Compound.

As nice as it was to visit the Barton homestead again? Between the nagging sense that the conversation was eventually going to turn to topics she'd be more comfortable leaving alone—while no longer entirely secret in her present company, they weren't ones Nadine was overly fond of talking about—and the antsy feeling that she should be doing something, the blonde assassin had begun absently wondering if it would've been wiser to stay behind at the Compound while Natasha, Nina and the Twins made their visit. She could have settled in and gotten some more work done on her different tracking projects in relative solitude.

Well, it was too late to do anything about it now, at any rate. Not to mention the fact that Natasha had given her no opportunity to even try and reason her way out of it. And she was admittedly enjoying the break even if her long ingrained habits against inactivity weren't leaving her alone.

Even if Barton did have a rather mischievous look growing in his eye as he glanced to her.

"So are you going to stick around?" Nadine was nearly tempted to roll her eyes. As if he didn't know the answer already...

"Everyone keeps asking that," she evaded, exasperation threading her tone. "Natasha, Rogers, the Twins, Hill, Fury...even Thor asked before he left." Barton grinned.

"Well, everyone's curious what the Ghost is going to do next. No one's quite sure. You're good at disappearing, but you don't exactly have a reason to disappear anymore." She glanced to him, her eyes narrowing in challenge.

"Don't I?"

"Not like you did. Your secrets are either safe, known by people you trust enough to keep them or simply not important enough to worry about anymore."

"And the fact that I'm a wanted criminal?" Barton actually barked out a laugh.

"C'mon, Ryker. You really expect me to believe you're worried about getting caught?" Her nose wrinkled even as she fought back a chuckle at his reaction. He did have a point, after all, and not just about her concern about being arrested. Honestly, she wasn't entirely sure if he was right, but she found she rather wanted him to be. Next to Clint, Laura retook her seat at the end of the table on Nadine's left, setting a glass of lemonade in front of her husband. Shooting Nadine a fondly exasperated look as she did, the brunette could only shake her head as she took a sip from her own glass. Nadine bit back another chuckle, working instead on maintaining her purposefully annoyed expression. It didn't entirely work, and Nadine truthfully didn't really care.

"Well, we were all happy to hear that you'd decided to stay," Laura added kindly, pointedly putting an end to her husband's teasing even as Clint began grinning mischievously again at Nadine from across the table. Nadine shot her a grateful smile.

"I think Nina's certainly happy about it," he added impishly, glancing over to where the kids and the three Avenger trainees sat in the next room. Nadine scowled.

"Oh, didn't I tell you?" Nadine scowled as Natasha dropped back into the seat on her other side, pushing a refilled glass of lemonade into her sister's hands as she smirked. "Nina's not the only one happy she's staying." Both Natasha and Barton looked entirely too entertained by the announcement, the two of them looking nearly conspiratorial as they each met the other's eye. Laura looked similarly amused by the statement, though she kept it to herself far better. The other two weren't even trying.

"Does that mean you and Cap are back on good terms?" The mischievous glint in his eyes belied the near innocent way Barton asked it. Next to him, Laura placed a gently restraining hand on his forearm, catching Nadine's eye with a sympathetic expression before pointedly rolling her eyes at her husband and friend's not quite subtle probing.

"They're getting there," Natasha answered before Nadine had even opened her mouth. She levelled an exasperated look at her little sister. Natasha just smiled sweetly back. Barton stifled a chuckle, but couldn't quite manage to hold back his smug grin.

"It's going slowly," Nadine added, still eying her sister, wary of further interruptions and ignoring their ridiculous insinuations. "I burned him pretty badly with my secrets."

"I hope he's coming around," Clint commented, earning a narrow-eyed look from the blonde assassin. He met it without hesitation. Sensing that he wasn't going to budge if she decided to argue the point, Nadine didn't bother. Instead she settled for letting him know what she thought of the comment with her expression alone. Clint's smirk deepened while even Laura was biting back a grin.

The four adults lapsed into silence, Clint heeding the gently chiding look from his wife to stop teasing Nadine. It was only after several minutes of listening to the laughter and cheerful chattering from the living room that someone finally decided to speak.

Clint nodded absently in the direction of the living room before looking back to Nadine. "How's Nina doing?" Nadine didn't answer right away, looking toward the other room herself as she turned the question over in her head. She knew he wasn't referring to how she was getting on with the training.

"Well enough, all things considered," she finally said, looking back to the Bartons. Clint nodded, but there was something in the way he was watching her that had her faltering. He'd picked up on the reservation she hadn't quite been able to hide from her voice. He'd picked up that she was worried about Nina. And judging by the similarly considering look on Laura's face? The archer's wife had noticed too. Nearly before she could stop herself, the confession just spilled out.

If it hadn't felt so good to let it out, to share it, she might have been confounded at the way her control faltered.

"Something's...something's bothering her, but she won't talk to me," Nadine said, her voice painfully small. "Not like she used to. On the surface, everything seems fine. But I just can't help this feeling..." Barton sighed, while Laura laid a comforting hand on her arm, squeezing gently in encouragement. Sympathetic concern had appeared in her sister's eyes even as Natasha's face went carefully blank. "And...and I'm worried. She hasn't once tried to talk about our old lives, about not being able to go back. She hasn't asked about school—she was so excited about university...and she hasn't mentioned it at all since Sokovia. And now she's so determined to go through with this Avenger training...I just—I don't know." Her fingers had tightened around her glass, and Nadine had to consciously will them to loosen lest she crack it. She exhaled sharply, internally berating herself for bringing down the mood. No one spoke for a long moment, neither of the Bartons nor Natasha quite knowing how to respond right away.

"She had a huge shock, Ryker. More than one, really. And not one of them easy to process, I think. Not only did she find out about the Ghost, but she was forced to realize that you...that you're human." Nadine started, turning wide-eyed to Clint as he finally broke the silence. He met her gaze. "She's realized that you've made mistakes—some pretty big ones, at that, even if she doesn't know what they are—that you had a past before her, and that you feel fear. That's a big deal for any kid, but especially for Nina, I bet. I rather doubt she's ever actually seen you afraid before, not until Sokovia. That's a huge blow. She's trying to reconcile all that with the unflappable mother she's known her whole life."

"How do you know I was unflappable," she countered weakly. "You didn't know me that well." Clint grinned. Next to her, Laura chuckled while on her other side Nat smiled fondly as she met Clint's eye, her carefully blank expression melting away. Barton grinned back before turning his wry gaze back to Nadine.

"Because I know Nat. And I know me." He sobered, taking a deep, bracing breath as he lined up his thoughts. "People like us? Parents never want their kids to see them afraid, or uncertain or wrong. Add to that what we are? What we do for a living? The fact that we already have to hide so much of who and what we are from them to keep them safe and protected. To keep them happy and innocent for as long as we can? That impulse only gets stronger." Nadine sighed. She couldn't deny that he was right; she'd been living with that reality longer than he had. Next to her, Laura shifted, absently squeezing her arm again in sympathy.

"Maybe," she said gently, pausing for a moment to measure her words as Clint had before taking up where her husband left off, "maybe you did try a little too hard. Maybe you kept Nina in the dark for too long. Maybe your efforts to spare her and protect her innocence at how bad the world can be were a little too effective. Or maybe that's exactly what got her through. I don't know." She glanced around to Clint and Nat, the archer steadily meeting his wife's eye before nodding slowly in agreement while Natasha watched her sister, her own expression unreadable. Laura glanced back to Nadine, a kind smile on her face before turning thoughtful again. "I don't think any of us can know. But either way, now she's having to get used to a whole lot real fast."

"I know," Nadine murmured after Laura had fallen silent, not caring how suddenly tired she sounded. She'd been wondering as much almost since the moment Nina was taken. She had prepared her in some ways, yes...but in her efforts to protect Nina's happiness, perhaps she didn't prepare her enough either.

Hindsight certainly stung when it landed a hit.

"But," Laura smiled as she glanced over to Nina where she sat with the Twins and the Barton children in the living room, "everything you did, you did with the best intentions. And from what little I've seen of your daughter? She has a gentle soul, Nadine. A gentle, compassionate soul. She'll understand. And she'll forgive. It's just going to take time." Nadine could only nod, her throat closing up with emotion. She hoped more than she could say that Laura was right. She'd been trying to convince herself as much since she had sat down with Nina about her secrets. In his chair, Barton shifted, obviously weighing a question before deciding to let it out.

"Have you...have you tried asking her about it? Whatever it is she's keeping from you?" Nadine almost violently shook her head at the question.

"No. One thing I've learned in my line of work—and something I've learned raising a teenager—is that it's sometimes best not to pry. That it's best to wait and let them come—let Nina come to me. Whatever it is? Worried as I might be about what it's about? I can't. Her trust has already been shaken enough by my secrets, Barton.

"So no. As much as I'd like to, I won't push her. Not yet. She already has enough to come to terms with. When she's ready to tell me what's bothering her, I will listen. But I won't force her to confide in me. Not now." Laura bit back a chuckle, earning a questioning glance from her husband and a quirked eyebrow from Natasha. Nadine could only frown, confused by the reaction.

"Well," she said, meeting Nadine's gaze with a twinkle of amusement in her dark eyes, "you're probably better equipped to judge than we are." When Nadine's confused frown deepened and matching ones began to grow on Natasha and Clint's faces, Laura's grin widened as she gestured absently between herself and her husband. "We haven't graduated to teenagers quite yet."

Nadine couldn't help herself. A short, huffing laugh bubbled up from her chest followed by another. Laura grinned as the three spies around her chuckled and snorted at her bid to lighten the mood, almost smugly satisfied that her gamble worked.

As the laughter eased, Clint looked to Nadine, visibly relieved even if his expression still held a trace of worry. That expression alone let her know what was coming next.

"You don't think that, maybe... Finding out about..." he hesitated, clearing his throat before continuing, "how did she take hearing about, err...everything." Nadine couldn't help it. She tensed at the question, but was immediately forcing herself to relax, forcing back her long-ingrained instincts to shut down. She probably shouldn't have been surprised that he'd consider the possibility of a correlation there. She'd been wondering about it too.

"What she heard, she took as well as I could've hoped," she finally answered softly, looking up to the Bartons. Clint sighed, but he looked like he understood. Laura, on the other hand, couldn't quite hide that she was confused, her brow furrowing slightly as she glanced between Clint and the two female spies.

"Everything...you mean about your—your secrets? Your identity as The Ghost?" Nadine nodded in response to the softly spoken questions.

"And about why...why she was targeted," Nadine added softly. The furrow over Laura's brow deepened as her expression grew thoughtful. A brittle smile tugged at Nadine's lips. Laura wanted to ask why—it was written all over her face and posture—but she was politely restraining the urge. Nadine's found her respect for the brunette rising yet again at the realization. She was a good friend.

And that realization alone nearly had her smiling despite the anxious fluttering beginning to grow in her gut. She genuinely considered Laura—and Clint, she automatically added—as a friend. She had real friends. It was certainly a novel feeling. It was a pleasant feeling.

But as pleasant a realization as it was, the feeling dimmed as she focused on the questioning expression Laura wore and the sympathetic one on her sister's face. So Clint had kept the most precious of her secrets from even his wife. A rush of gratitude toward the archer surged through her. Only to realize that she didn't mind the idea of Laura knowing. Nadine sighed.

"You know I'm Enhanced?" Laura nodded despite them both knowing full well she already knew the answer. Nadine nearly grinned at the memory of sharing that detail of her life with the other woman, the light-hearted moment quite possibly when part of Nadine had decided Laura was to be her friend. "Well, Nina inherited some of it from me. The man who ordered her abduction? He wanted her because of her parentage." Laura nodded absently before a thought suddenly struck her. Her frown deepened and her gaze sharpened as she looked to Nadine.

"Parentage? You mean—" She cut herself off as Nadine tensed again, this time unable to counter the inadvertent reaction before the other three noticed. "I'm sorry. Nadine, I—it's none of my business. You don't have to explain," the brunette hurried to amend. But Nadine slowly shook her head, looking up to Laura. On her other side, Natasha laid a comforting hand on her arm, squeezing gently. But strangely enough, she didn't mind. Not really. She was beginning to truly realize the burden eased when she could share it with others she knew wouldn't betray her trust.

"No. It's okay," Nadine said softly, nevertheless hesitating despite the assurance. It was an odd feeling, to actually feel alright with the idea of confiding aspects of her past with those she trusted...to actually feel like she had people she could trust. Naturally she trusted her sister, but she'd also come to trust Clint and surprisingly she found herself just as willing to trust Laura for all that she barely knew the woman. She wasn't honestly sure if she did yet, but she wanted to. And so she decided to trust the Barton matriarch just as she trusted her sister and Barton himself.

She spared a quick glance to ensure they weren't in danger of being overheard. "You've...you've heard of the Winter Soldier, I assume?" Cautiously, Laura nodded, her gaze worried but curious and infinitely patient, something Nadine appreciated to no end. "He was involved in my and Natasha's training and...well..." She bit back a heavy sigh, checking again to ensure that Nina was still out of hearing range before turning back to the Bartons.

But she really didn't need to say anything more. Laura was a sharp woman, and the apparent non sequitur followed by Nadine's barely concealed and anxious glance to Nina, plus whatever small details she'd gleaned from her husband and Natasha? Especially considering what Nadine had just segued the conversation away from? Straightening slightly, Laura met Nadine's eye before glancing significantly to Nina, her eyebrows rising in silent question. Nadine could only nod, a lump forming in her throat.

"She doesn't know," Nadine managed to choke out, her voice barely more than a whisper. The brunette let out a soft, gusting breath, meeting her husband's eye for a moment.

"And that's why this Strucker character took her? Because of who you are and..." she trailed off pointedly.

"Because of who her father is, yes," Nadine continued just as quietly, confirming Laura's line of thought. Laura met Clint's sombre gaze again for a moment.

"Oh, wow," she murmured sadly. Nadine could only nod in agreement, and before she knew it, what had happened all those years before was spilling past her lips.

"They, umm...I was enlisted to help...maintain him. What they'd done to him, to his head, his mind to make him the 'perfect agent'? Well, they believed him to be sub-human; no longer capable of feeling or free will. But he was still...still affected by more biological impulses," she said, her voice scathing as she paraphrased what Madame B had told her at the time. "I'd refused...but that didn't suit our training mistress' plans. So she...she took steps to make sure it happened anyway.

"And I played right into it." Both the Bartons' looked stricken as Nadine's bitter voice fell silent, Clint's just as much as Laura's despite knowing to some degree what had happened already. As Laura processed what Nadine had revealed, her head slowly began to shake, and it became obvious that she had no idea how to respond.

"I—Nadine, that's...I'm so sorry," she finally murmured. Nadine shrugged, unable to meet any one of their eyes. Instead she stared sightlessly at the glass in front of her, her fingers absently turning and nudging the nearly empty cup in the small pool of condensation that had gathered below it.

"It was a long time ago," she brushed off, glancing up at the brunette. Only to notice Clint frowning next to his wife, his features thoughtful as he watched Nadine playing with her glass. Automatically, her fingers stilled. He looked up to her.

"What I don't understand is why you even got pregnant in the first place," he asked softly, continuing before Natasha could voice the dry comment they could all practically hear her spooling up to say. "I mean, considering what little I know about that place? The way Nat's implied that they micromanaged everything? I'd have thought they'd...take precautions," he finished with an awkward grimace. Nadine couldn't help but grin at his discomfort. But it was Natasha who answered, her voice emotionless and resigned.

"Well, considering that any graduating Red Room Recruits are all ultimately sterilized?" Immediately Clint winced, looking almost desperately apologetic at the reminder as he glanced up to his best friend. Natasha shook her head, shooting him a wan grin that indicated it was already forgiven. He didn't look overly reassured, but he let it go. Nadine shrugged again. She hadn't wanted to say anything without knowing how much Natasha had shared with the Bartons, but clearly that was one thing her little sister had shared.

"I was close enough to Graduation that they didn't see the need to concern themselves with that, I suppose," she picked up, drawing Laura and Clint's attention away from Natasha. Her sister shot her a fleeting look of gratitude. "Besides, it was a development that worked out alright for our training mistress." Clint tensed in his seat, his hand inadvertently tightening where it rested across his wife's shoulders as his gaze grew intent. He'd obviously put it together. And Laura looked just as alarmed even if she was slightly more in the dark.

"She's the one..." the archer's voice faltered, anger and disbelief mingling in his tone. Nadine nodded in confirmation. Clint only barely kept his features from twisting in fury as he understood the implications. Laura glanced between her husband and the two sisters, her face screwed up in thought as she came to the same conclusion a moment later. Nadine saw the instant she understood.

"Yeah," the blonde assassin confirmed bitterly, "she was the one who sold me out to HYDRA. Who sold both of us out." She let out a long, slow breath, forcing back her lingering anger at the woman when it threatened to overtake her again. "First she wanted me gone, and then she wanted Nina for her program...and when she couldn't get what she wanted, she gave my daughter to Strucker."

"She's the one you both went after." Two sets of sharp eyes—one set vibrant green, the other cool grey—were suddenly fixed on the archer. "When I called you to watch the kids. The mission; you went after her? Your training mistress?" Natasha was the one to confirm it, nodding only once. Nadine simply stared at him, her face unreadable. Clint's features hardened at the answer while, next to him, Laura's face grew serious, mingled concern and interest shining in her eyes as she realized what he was talking about. The archer's eyes flicked between the two female spies, his voice quiet and dispassionate when he finally continued.

"And you took care of her?" The answer was clear on Nadine's face as she met his gaze, the corner of her lip lifting. It was a harsh expression.

"Permanently."

"Good." Nadine raised a questioning eyebrow at Laura, her harsh expression easing, but the brunette met the assassin's gaze evenly. The look in her eyes was one Nadine knew intimately; no one messed with their children.

Off in the living room the light mood and cheerful laughter from those children were utterly apart from the heavy topic that had been brought up in the kitchen. Nina had little Nate in her lap while Wanda flew toys around him carried by pale wisps of red. Pietro was chuckling as he settled next to them, Lila hanging off his back, chattering excitedly about how fast they'd been going even as Cooper asked if he could have a turn.

It was such a wonderful, innocent, ordinary scene for all its extraordinary details.

Suddenly craving the lightness that the living room held, Nadine spared the other three adults a wan grin before standing from the table. Mercifully, they let her go without a word. It was beginning to feel like her insides were quivering with the effort from keeping her emotions in check without shutting down altogether, her memories and worries trying to emerge to torment her.

But as she walked around the end table to where the three Barton children were being entertained by their new friends, the tense feeling in her gut melted away as Nina looked up to her with a smile. Next to her Lila laughed at the way Wanda's powers were tickling her nose in good-natured retribution for a cheeky comment. And in her daughter's lap, little Nate grinned a delighted gummy grin, his chubby fists flailing happily, too young to understand what was going on, but reacting to the cheerful atmosphere nonetheless.

With a smile of her own, Nadine swooped in, plucking the smiling baby from Nina's hold. A smile that only grew as he wiggled happily, his pudgy little fingers grasping enthusiastically at her pale hair. Feeling the last of the tension that lingered from the serious topic she'd left behind in the kitchen disappear with each cheerful coo from the squirming baby in her arms, Nadine held little Nate closer, tapping his nose with the tip of her finger.

"C'mon, Tolya. I'm rescuing you from these overgrown children."

A peal of giggles from the infant boy filled the room.

A/N: A/N: Here we go! Part II! And what a way to kick off, with visit to the Barton farm.

Don't you just love them? C: I know I do!

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