The jungle was quiet. As quiet as a jungle gets. Birds tweeted. Monkeys chatted. Spiders made webs and snakes hissed.

Suddenly, Vlad and I burst through the foliage. Leaves and branches scattered in our wake. I'm screaming at the top of my lungs. The killer vines aren't far behind us, and not far behind them is the man-eating plant they grew from. The plant with red petals opened is maw and slobbered. Its mouth would make a shark cry.

I froze mid-jump. Vlad was frozen in place next to me. I looked terrified while he looked...stoic, though his eyes were a little wide in fear. The homicidal houseplant was also frozen in time a few feet away.

So, you're probably wondering how I got into this mess: running through the jungle pursued by a botanist's nightmare fuel with a vampire at my side.

ROAR!!

Oh yeah. And the dinosaurs. Let's not forget about them.

Honestly, I'm not too sure what happened either. I guess it's best if I start at the beginning.

***

"In the beginning, the world was void and without form..."

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Not that far back. Fast forward a bit.

***

"Grog hooted and grunted in joy for he had discovered fire."

Try again.

***

"Right here, on this very stage, a very special band will perform. Allow me to introduce...The Beatles!"

It was yesterday! OK! It happened yesterday afternoon!

***

The members of Delta Squad were once again in the heat of battle.

"Broccoli does not go on pizza!" said CyberPunk.

"Oh," said Sportsgirl, "and pineapple does."

"It at least makes more sense."

I removed my black sunglasses and rubbed at my eyes. Why do we have to go through this every lunch?

"Hey!" said Turbo, putting an end to the yelling. When an amalgam of a dinosaur, scorpion, eagle, reptile, lion, and human speaks, people tend to listen. "Did someone order a bat?" He pointed with his lion paw-hands to a brown bat resting on the round table.

How'd that get in? I thought checking the walls and ceilings. This is a sealed room.

Brood made a sound similar to a groan but also like he was trying to hide the groan. "Oh no." The bat fluttered over to him. It dropped a piece of paper in his hand before perching on his shoulder--it looked exhausted. Without looking at the paper Brood said, "It's a message from my family."

"You have bats send messages?" I asked. "Why not use an owl like normal supernatural beings?"

Brood shot me a stern look. "Are you crazy? Owls eat bats. Owls are our natural enemy. Other than you, Kibble Brain."

"Good to know," I said. "(Now I know what to get you for Christmas.)"

"What does it say?" asked Daphne, trying to broker some semblance of peace.

"Some thing as every year. They are inviting me home for the holidays." Brood crumpled the message and tossed it over his shoulder.

Daphne held her hands close to her chest like an excited schoolgirl. "Christmas? How sweet."

"Hardly," said Brood with a small scoff. "Vampires hate Christmas."

"Seems logical with all the crosses," I said.

"No. They want me home for Winter Solstice. December 21st is the longest night of the year. That is our Christmas."

"You should go," said Daphne.

"No." It was amazing how Brood could make a single word sound like a punch. "I turned my back on their bloodthirsty ways."

Daphne deflated a bit into her seat. "But they're still your family."

CyberPunk retrieved the discarded paper and unfolded it. Brood stood. "They would once again try to bring me back into the fold," he said. "I cannot return...It is complicated."

"Doesn't sound like it," said CyberPunk. "They want to apologize and celebrate you as you. And to show their support of your lifestyle, they've even invited that 'no-good chicken-killing werewolf you work with.'"

I huffed. "I've never killed a chicken."

In a blink, Brood loomed over the green-skinned gremlin. "Did I say you could read that?"

CyberPunk gulped. "N-n-no?"

Brood snatched the paper and spun arund only to meet the pleading eyes of Daphne. He sighed. "Fine. I'll go. Rover, I'll meet you at the jet."

"Why do I have to go?"

"Because when they eventually convince me to once again drink blood, I want to make sure you're there." A small side-smirk grew along the right side of his face. "To stop me, of course."

"Yeah, sure," I laughed. "Of course."