Dedicated to SamEl145

Darshan had no clue where to start or with what he should start the conversation, when he asked the preference question he had no fear but confusions. But Yash did not utter any word, for a blink of eyes, Darshan caught the pain on Yash's cold facade and it vanished as soon as it appeared like it was never there. Darshan felt guilty for such a start, he shouldn't have said the thing, that he knew who was the person beside him, but rather should've kept the conversation a bit easy, after all they met after two weeks of gap.

Tilting his head to Yash's face, Darshan asked "How have you been in these days?"

Yash looked at Darshan and their eyes met, Darshan clearly could see the tiredness in those dim golden brown eyes, but what was tiring the Death Lord?

As Darshan averted his eyes, Yash gave a sad smile to himself and said "Like always, busy with work and life. I hope Bhargav kept you a well company?"

Darshan found a lie in those words, keeping his eyes ahead he said "Yash, I know you're lying. I just want to tell you that you don't have to feel yourself guilty for my outburst or anything. It was never your fault to hide yourself, okay. I understand that I overreacted on the truth but I should've realised that earlier. So this couldn't come to this point."

Darshan hold his breath while waiting for Yash's reaction, but there was none except the sad smile.

When Yash realised that Darshan was waiting for his answer, he exhaled a soundless sigh and calmly said "Darshan, you don't have to press yourself for accepting this life, the others or me. I will never put these things on you. I don't want myself as a burden on you. Just do what your heart your wants."

As soon as those words left Yash's mouth, his eyes fell on Darshan's and they were almost teary. Darshan looked pained, raged and frustrated too, while Yash kept the same sad smile with his cold gaze. But to Darshan the slightest quiver on Yash's lips gave him a hint that he still had something to tell and for that he was lacking courage.

With heavy breaths, Darshan tried to clarify himself "Yash, trust me, you're not pressing this to me. I'm accepting this in my life, I'm accepting you in my life. My own negligence screwed up everything. It's me who should take the blame instead of you."

A self-blaming Darshan was the last thing Yash needed to see, his posture stiffened more. Darshan realised whatever fear was holding back Yash, was gone. A dread feeling arose within Darshan as if he was going to hear which he would never dare to listen.

When Yash talked, his voice seemed as cold as he looked, but the blinking golden brown eyes gave away the pain inside of the person.

"Don't blame yourself, Darshan. I'll never forgive myself if you keep any remorse to yourself. Actually I should've known that from the beginning, I should've controlled myself. I should've kept away from you, so that you wouldn't have to face these."

Darshan's tears rolled out of his eyes, his voice was quivering to the point of breaking, still he kept his strength.

"So you regret it. I don't know how to make you believe. But I know a thing for sure and that is my heart and soul belongs only to you. I can not deny my feelings for you, not even when you are denying yours. If you think ofme as a selfish person, then I'm selfish when this is coming to you. And I want you to be selfish for once, for me."

How could Yash make Darshan believe that the life he would have had with the Death Lord was never an ideal life at all, at least not until he became Divine again? He was selfish enough to keep his pains, loneliness to himself.

Closing his eyes once, only to hold back his almost spilled tears, Yash took a deep breath and said "Darshan, you know who I am. My life isn't like how it's looked. The person infront of you is just a facade. The real person can not belong to you. My life isn't a life you'll want."

Darshan had enough of being pushed away, frustration was weighing him, controlling his strength for once more, he said "You're talking about your life? Don't forget that I grew up talking with ghosts, making them my friends, my whole life is more intertwined with them than living human. And the facade?"

His voice trembled with his shaky breathing "Yash, you remember the first time I saw you? You were in your original form. And I'm not afraid of you, as when it comes to my heart its fully yours or the Death Lord's. Whatever form you're in, you're still the person for whom I yarn. Please Yash, don't make me feel all vacant again."

Darshan's painful, teary eyes penetrated through Yash's controlled ones.

Keeping his slightly trembling hand on Yash's warm cheek, Darshan said "You don't have to keep up the facade infront of me, Yash. Your coldness isn't what makes you the person you're for me. You need rest too, you also need to let go the stoic person within you."

His voice became more like a whisper "And you can relay your vulnerability infront of me, you can show yourself infront of me. Trust me, for me you're still the same Yash who cares for me, who keeps me safe, who gives me warmth. I just want the chance to make you realise that I do the same for you. I may not be able to do much, but for you I can offer the whole me..."

Before Darshan could say more, Yash lost his control and hugged Darshan into a bone-crashing embrace. Yash was silent as ever, but with the slight trembling of his body, Darshan realised that Yash was crying and he hugged him back.

Caressing Yash's back, Darshan assured "Don't worry, you've got me till the end."

When Yash broke the hug, his cold face was gone, his eyes still had tears that finally refused to roll out, they were fixed on Darshan's adorning ones. Darshan felt his spirit lifted, a longing smile crept on his face, and Yash could not hold back his own chuckle.

Yash's voice was heavy for crying, arching one eyebrow, faking a seriousness, he asked "Are you sure that you won't run away from the Death Lord?"

Darshan caught the playfulness, with a smirk he answered "Try me."

As soon as those words left Darshan's lips, Yash was back in his original form; the gold-black robe shimmering with an unworldly glimmer, face hooded, radiating the fierce aura of Death, with the golden-black whip neatly hanging from his waistband.

Yash lifted his hood, revealing the glistening golden brown eyes, his neatly combed coal black hair came down in a flattened position. For the first time Darshan realised that Yash's hair was ear-length, just like he saw him in his memories, a feel of pride surged through him.

Darshan's eyes fell on the pendant like round thing, hanging from a black string around Yash's neck, the feeling of the strange familiarity with it caught his whole attention. Yash was scrutinising Darshan's reactions minutely for the whole time, he saw adoration, pride and comfort, then he caught the searing curiosity in Darshan's eyes. Yash realised that the lost soul was yearning for its another lost part, obviously they would react when they were so close.

Yash did not want to make the things more difficult for Darshan, exhaling a relieved sigh, he teased "You really want to admire me on the middle of the road, huh?!"

Darshan's attention returned to Yash's face which was holding back a grin, a pink tint rose on Darshan's cheeks which deepened with every passing seconds, though he shook his head in denying, he got lost again on the person in front of him, Yash found him adorable.

Yash finally let out a low chuckle which startled Darshan a bit, he looked around him and realised that they were near the university main gate and it seemed like the curfew was very near. Darshan suddenly did not want to go back to his room, he felt like if there was no curfew that would be better, eyes downcast, his expressions looked sad.

Yash who realised what was wrong, stated with an amusing smile "You haven't changed at all."

Darshan looked at Yash, he knew what Yash was talking about, with a beaming face, he remarked "I don't know how was the me all those thousands years ago, but I promise that you'll love this me too."

With a confident smile, Yash replied "Without any doubt."

Then he kissed on Darshan's forehead and Darshan froze at once, he looked all the places except towards Yash, he was checking if someone saw them. Actually there were not much people, just the students returning from their late night ventures, even if they watched them, Darshan could not care less. Yash's voice made him look back at Yash who was also looking at those people.

"Don't worry, they can not see me in my original form."
Then looking back at Darshan he added "Unless someone is near his or her death."

Darshan's expression went embarrassed to astonished, a question immediately popped up "Then how can..."

Before he could complete, with an amusing smile, Yash answered "You're not fully a human being, Darshan. Apart from being a part of the Vision Lord, you're a son of a Lady."

Giving an awkward laugh, Darshan exclaimed "Oh! Yeah. I almost forgot that."

Yash did not know what to say on this as it was still a matter to be solved and that should be between the mother and the son.

Keeping his hand on Darshan's shoulder, with a kind smile, he said "Darshan keep your mind clear when you talk to her. Listen to her side and you'll understand what she have been through."

Darshan only nodded in agreement, and Yash hugged him again to assure that he was there to hold him, to support him. As their body collided with each other and the round thing touched Darshan's body, Darshan felt like his mind was going to explode with so many voices, scenes. A frown rose between his eyebrows as he tried to centre his mind in one place, then he felt himself drifting into a darkness.

His vision automatically cleared after a moment or two, he saw himself in a battlefield, the smell of blood was everywhere, rotten bodies with newly dead bodies were piled, everywhere he looked he only could see dead bodies.

Just a few feet ahead, a tall slender boy of fifteen or sixteen in a white robe with golden embroidery work on it, was looking all around just like him. When the boy looked at his back, he came to face to face with Darshan and Darshan's eyes widened as recognition struck him; he was seeing his almost ten years younger self infront him, the differences were the waist-long silky jet black hair, the white robe and the surroundings.

The younger Darshan's eyes seemed frozen too, for a moment Darshan thought that they were looking at each other but as the younger one's expression turned from pained to determined, Darshan got confused, he looked at his back where the younger self was actually staring.

Just like the younger self, he froze too as what he was witnessing was beyond belief; a few more feet ahead, on a high pile of dying people stood another boy of the same age, Darshan's expression became horrified yet worried as he recognised the young boy.

That boy was in a golden black robe, his physique not so firm but his broad shoulder indicated he would be well built in later years, his ear-length coal black hair was messy because of the breeze, almost shadowing his whole forehead.

But the most horrifying thing on that boy's face was his eyes, they were crimson red as if blood would ooz out anytime, they were unfocused to his surroundings, only on the bodies beneath him. His slightly brown pink lips curved into an evil smirk as a black aura kept rising from those bodies and got sucked into the boy's body.

Darshan felt more worried, more pained to see the younger self of Yash in such condition, he just could not stand and see. Before he could take a step toward that place, he felt a block of fresh white light passed through him, he looked at his own body and realised he was not there physically, it was more likely his consciousness was present there.

When he looked forward to see what the white light was, he saw his younger self ran through him and without stopping on his track, the younger self tightly hugged the younger self of Yash. The black aura still kept creeping up, it was gradually surrounding them, Darshan tried to move from his place but to his dismay he was glued at that spot, he had to help them, but again without a body what could he do?

As the black aura reached almost to their chest, a more bright white light started surging from the younger Darshan, it was so blinding that even in his bodyless form, the older Darshan felt the sting of his eyes. Gradually there was no black aura to be seen, only the blinding white light and the older Darshan instinctively closed his eyes.

As he opened his eyes, he witnessed that he was in a big hall room, no, it was not big, it was huge, seemed to be part of a huge palace, the walls were all made of pure gold, every pillar was decorated with various gems with magnificent designs; there were probably thousand torched lights, attached with every pillar, they were strangely giving away silvery flames and a silvery light that kept illuminating the whole place.

It was a worthy scene to watch, but what caught Darshan's attention was the person, standing infront of him, that person was in a white robe with golden embroidery work on it, he looked tall with a slender physique, probably of the same height of Darshan and also of his age.

Darshan heard a deep, smooth voice calling his name, he looked behind only to come face to face with an older version of Yash, or the same Yash who was with him, more specifically with his body. Yash looked handsome as ever with his well built physique, yellowish fair skin, his ear-length coal black hair was casually combed, his golden brown eyes were glistening with joy, adoration and awe too.

Darshan could not understand what could've happened in the past years that changed Yash into the present form, but he realised that soon when the other person in white robe came infront.

Darshan's eyes widened, he was seeing himself, the person in white robe was actually him or the ancient him, just like Yash, the other Darshan also grew well. Darshan's eyes fell on the ancient self's eyes, they were lighter golden brown, more brownish than golden and his waist-long silky hair was gone, it was cut off to his shoulder.

Darshan suddenly remembered that his own hair was kept too, which already had reached to his nape. The ancient Darshan, filled with joy, almost ran to Yash, embracing him into a tight hug, he gave a peck on Yash's lips.

Before Yash could utter his question, Darshan stuffed a pile of a white cloth in Yash's hands and almost shouting, said "Happy Birthday Yashraj!"

Yash was still awestruck, he kept staring at the beaming Darshan who was nodding his head and indicating Yash to open the pile of the white cloth. Yash started opening the folds and kept sneaking at the restless Darshan whose expression was becoming more and more excited.

The Darshan who came from future, was watching the bliss between the two and felt a eternal warmth surging through himself, if he was physically present there, he would've been beamed like the ancient self. Suddenly he started to think of the oddity of their behaviour, it seemed like the present Yash became more like the ancient Darshan and the present Darshan, the more he watched his past self, the more he felt himself being a bit embarrassed.

A loud gasp from the ancient Yash brought him out of his wonder, he looked at Yash who kept staring at the thing in his hands and then at the ancient Darshan who was fidgeting with his fingers and nibbling his lower lip, he was worried.

The invisible Darshan carefully looked at the thing in Yash's hands and he gasped silently, the thing looked like a thick bundle of rope, it was black and a golden light was shimmering around it. How could Darshan forget the thing that saved his life once from a sure death? The first thing, he saw as the identification of the Death Lord, the infamous Death Whip of the Death Lord.

Seeing an almost petrified Yash, the ancient Darshan said with a shaky voice "Yashraj don't keep staring only. Please say something. If you didn't like the gift, I can think of a better one. Tell me what do you wish?"

Yash's voice was almost raspy, he asked "Why did you cut off your hair to just present me this thing?"

The ancient Darshan's mouth opened and then shut again, exhaling a small sigh, he said "Yash, the thing you're possessing now, is actually a spiritual weapon. You know that I have been sorting out solutions about your outrageous form. After all everytime I can't be there to calm down you."

Yash looked more sad in that mention, still he let Darshan continue.
Knowing Yash's mental condition, with a rather cheerful light tone, Darshan continued

"And this is the best and easy solution I got. Since every part of my body can be used as spiritual weapon, I can spare some. I haven't sacrificed any body part Yash, it's just my hair. You know how much bothersome it was for me to handle so long hair."

Yash was not expecting such a calm explanation from Darshan, his expression became grim, with the deep smooth voice, he said "Darshan, you don't need to bear the horrible situation with me, I can handle that."

A frustrated Darshan replied "Yeah, I know how much you can handle. Now listen to me seriously, this Whip will help you with controlling your unbound power and restrain it from damaging your temperament. Moreover..."

With a pouting face, he added  "Think of it as a part of me. Won't it be great to have me by your side always even when I'm not with you?"

Yash could not argue further.
Huffing once in defeat, he said "You're always with me, Darshan. And as for this, I'll be keeping it then."

The invisible Darshan realised the night when Lady Rajani visited him, what she wanted to tell about his dominating nature. Though the origin of the Death Whip dumbfounded him, Darshan could not help but feel a relieving sensation that in his past life his works were useful to Yash.

A huge grin appeared on the ancient Darshan's face, he enthusiastically said "I was waiting for this day for so long when I'll attend my soul's golden attire and the day is finally here! You know I've got my twin today and it's a brother! Oh! I can't express my happiness in words."

He was so full of happiness that he grabbed Yash's both shoulders and started to shake him, he continued "You know he just looks like the younger me and I'm pretty sure when he'll grow up he'll just look like me. But let me warn you, he isn't calm and gentle like me, he is mischievous, playful and easygoing. Aah! I'm already adoring him."

Yash was listening to Darshan with an amusing smile, when he noticed that Darshan stopped shaking him and was loosing his mind somewhere else, he said "Happy Birthday to you too."

However Darshan reacted differently, with an incredulous expression, he said "Yashraj, you've got a sister! Congratulations! Why didn't you bring her to me? I wanna meet the princess of this Palace of Eternal Rest."

Yash's expression changed into a nervous one, hesitantly, he said "Darshan, she is asleep at this moment. I'll bring her to your palace someday."

With a concerned voice, Darshan asked "Yashraj, what are you hiding from me? Is there anything troubling you? If you let me see....."

Before Darshan could finish, Yash cut off him with a hurried yet assuring voice "No, that's not necessary. You'll know eventually."

Before the invisible Darshan could process the weight of the conversation or what was wrong with Lady Rajani, he felt a pull surging through him, as if he was going to be sucked into something. The scenes were all blurry in his eyes, while he felt himself falling into an endless pit of darkness.

A while after he felt himself on firm ground and he tried to look around him; surprisingly he was not alone there as there were hundreds of people who looked like human, but he had complete doubt on that fact. They all looked like they were mourning, their expressions were painful, scared, blank too.

But why did they look like that? Darshan realised their gazes were fixed on one direction, when he looked there, he felt a piercing through him, the pain was so unbearable that he felt as if his breath was knocked out of him.

Infront of him Yash was on a petrified sitting position, unending tears rolled out of his eyes, his cheeks had bloodstained handprints, his lips were pale from suppressed pain, they were horribly trembling, it seemed like Yash was desperately whispering something but was unable to say it loud. There was a lifeless body lying on his lap, all over soaked with crimson blood, the once white dress the person wore was no more recognisable, nor the person himself.

The invisible Darshan felt an ominous feeling creeping inside him, he tried to keep steady his almost tear blurred vision, then he saw himself again; all pale like paper, his eyes shut tight, there was no movement from his body, no up and down of the chest or any clue of breathing, as if he was just a lifeless body lying on his deathbed.

Suddenly the body started to disintegrate into nothing, Yash's whispering became more and more desperate, his whole body violently trembled as if it would break down any moment, and he became more and more stiff, the trembles made him look like a boulder in an earthquake.

As the body wholly disappeared from eyesight, all the people around started crying in various ways, and a  wail arose within the crowd. The invisible Darshan first did not realise who was the person, when he blinked his tear filled eyes to clear the blurs, he saw a disheveled, bitterly crying Bhargav who was shaking Yash's shoulders violently, only to let him cry aloud.

The invisible Darshan himself felt like breaking down at that very spot, he went towards Yash, kneeling down infront of Yash, he tried to sooth him desperately, but everytime his hand would pass through. Just when he felt himself falling apart for not being able to do much, Yash stired, clutching the round pendant like thing in his hands, he gave away the most horrible wail, he broke down completely. Darshan felt his eyes blurring again for the stinging, he closed them for a short relief.

All of a sudden the gravity started working, he was forcefully yanked out of the past, when he finally felt something firm beneath him, Yash's soul breaking wail was still ringing in his ears, he opened his tear filled swollen eyes in his hostel room. Yash was sitting on the chair, just beside him, he was back to his modern attire, he looked like he felt a thousand types of pain in few minutes.

When Yash saw that Darshan finally had opened his eyes, grabbing Darshan's hand in his hands, with a raspy voice, he said "Darshan, you're finally awake. I almost called Lady Amrita. You passed away on the road while embracing me, I've taken you to your hostel room. How are you feeling now? Should I call Lady Amrita for..."

Before Yash could utter any more words, sitting up on the bed, Darshan tightly hugged Yash and started crying. Yash had guessed what might have happened, he said nothing, just kept caressing Darshan's back and Darshan's sobs turned a little louder.

Yash too felt pain for Darshan, he did not know how to console him, as he knew at times like these, Darshan would always prefer silence. A few seconds later Yash realised that Darshan was whispering something in between his hiccups and sobs.

After carefully listening to him, he understood the phrase, "I'm sorry, Yashraj" was being repeated over and over again.

Darshan's painful voice was becoming unbearable for Yash, breaking the hug, cupping Darshan's face in his palms, he gently asked "Why are you saying sorry to me, Darshan? What did you do to me?"

Darshan through his sobbing and hiccups, answered "Sorry for leaving you like that. Sorry for causing so much pain to you. Sorry for my stupidity that I didn't realise what I was doing by keeping you away. I'm so sorry."

Yash could neither ready his mind nor his words to console Darshan, he simply hugged him again and said "Shhh....it's okay. Everything is okay, Darshan. You don't need to take blame for that. Nothing was in your hands, Darshan. You had no choice. Calm down, please."

After few more minutes of crying, Darshan finally sobered, his eyes looked bloodshot from crying, his cheeks were sticky, and his breathing was heavy.

When Yash realised that Darshan was not going to cry more he said "You're not gonna break down again like that, right? Seeing you like that, I can't handle myself. It's hurtful to even think. Please don't cry like that ever."

Darshan assured with a small nod, his head still downcast in some thoughts.

When he was sure about his own voice he asked Yash "What is the thing around your neck Yash?"

Yash looked directly into Darshan's puffed eyes, almost with a whisper, he asked "It showed you your memories, right?"

Darshan's expression drastically changed into a pained one, nodding once, he answered "Some memories. But what is it actually? I feel like I have an unbreakable connection with it. It seems to attract me a lot."

Nodding in understanding, Yash answered "It's called the Third Eye. And as for the cause why it attracted you..."

Yash seemed to be hesitating, but in the end he honestly answered "It's actually the lost divine part of your soul. You might have heard from Bhargav that it's lost."

When Darshan nodded in agreement, Yash continued "It was never lost. It have been staying here with me since you left us. Even when you were dying, you didn't forget your responsibilities as the Vision Lord."

In the end, a proud smile appeared on Yash's face and Darshan gave a small shy smile, finally the tension filled atmosphere seemed to be vanishing. Suddenly as if Darshan wanted to assure that he was not in the memories anymore, cupping Yash's face, he gave a soft peck on Yash's lips.

Yash was awestruck with Darshan's sudden action, when he got hold of his sense, he amusingly looked at Darshan who was suddenly interested into the floor.

With a heavy tone Yash said "You know? That wasn't enough."

Darshan looked back at Yash who was giving his best charming smile and he could melt no more; grabbing Yash's neck, he pulled him nearer and crushed his lips on Yash's, drowning into a needy yet gentle kiss.

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Hey, guys
Hope you are all good! 😊
First I need to say sorry for me going astray from my scheduled day 🙏 But as I told you I'm literally on the verge of going to hiatus, bless me which I didn't do 😧

So Yash and Darshan did not end up being separated!  Yay! 😉
Till now this chapter was the hardest one for me and longest one too! Over 4700 words!. But honestly, I enjoyed writing it 😍😍

That happened because of this Reviewer SamEl145    
Thank you so much for your views! Your review literally lifted up my spirit. I promise that I will work hard to refine my mistakes.

So guys, if you liked the chapter please VOTE 👍
And of course tell me your thoughts on this chapter. ✒

Till then stay safe, stay healthy and enjoy reading 😊

                ...............Anasuya Raj

11th January, 2021