Connor smiled at Kevin for a final time before lights out, Kevin giving a smile back from down the hall, both boys standing in their separate doorways that led to their rooms. A few more moments of a held gaze before Kevin stepped inside his room and Connor flicked the hallway lights off, then heading into his room, shutting the door behind him and looking at the dimly lit room, only a lamp on, with a curled up Poptarts on their shared bed, he was laying on the left side, meaning Connor would have to somehow get over him.

Connor paused for a moment, thinking about the day's events before moving to sit down in front of the bed, turning around to lean against the frame and let out a sigh.

"Huh...?" Chris immediately stirred from where he had previously been laying on the bed.

Connor flinched before turning his head, "Geez, Chris, you sleep lighter than a feather!"

"And you'd think you'd know that after sharing a room with me for several months." Chris muttered with irritation, "You sigh so dramatically."

"I like to call it loud, but alright." Connor shrugged.

"What's wrong?" Chris sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed so they hung beside Connor's right shoulder.

Connor shrugged, "Nothing, I guess."

"Did the date with Kevin not go well?" Chris frowned.

"No..., well, not exactly..." Connor trailed off.

"Spill." Chris reached into his back pocket, pulling out a poptart and unwrapping it.

"It's just...our dates go well, he's sweet and I'm swoony- and gay, of course, for him,"

"I should hope so." Chris commented with a full mouth of poptart.

Connor continued, "It's just...after the dates are over I feel like...he could care less for me- like, he does care, but...not a lot?"

"Not enough, you mean?" Chris slid down to sit next to Connor.

"That sounds greedy.."

"It sounds reasonable." Chris corrected, "Give me some examples."

"Well, while he's out on missionary duties- we'll email- but, he always leaves me on read whenever I send him pictures." Connor winded.

"Yeesh, left on red, not good." Chris nodded as he took another bite of poptart.

"And, I get it, it's not like you have to respond to a picture- it's not a question waiting for an answer, but...it makes me feel like he doesn't want to talk with me...like I'm giving him an opportunity to talk with me and he doesn't want to take it...that sounds selfish, doesn't it?" Connor groaned.

"It's hard not to sound selfish with this stuff, Con, you're in a relationship, and these kinds of things have "needs"- anything else?" Chris sighed.

"Whenever we sit next to each other- he always puts his book between us, so I can never actually sit next to him." Connor crossed his arms over his chest with a pout, "I'm being cock-blocked by a book."

"Yeah...sounds rough." Chris smirked with amusement.

"This must sound like rubbish to you." Connor pinched the bridge of his nose.

"It depends- why does it matter wether he sits next to you or doesn't?" Chris seemed to be looking at the door before smirking at Connor, "Why does it's matter whether or not he responds to your images?"

"I just...okay it's like...I don't always get to sit beside him...and, when I do, I feel like I'm given a chance to show him that I care, because he's worth a million, Chris, he really is- and that's why I like him, that's why I want to be beside him even if it's just on some lousy couch during a fifteen minute briefing, he's amazing...I want to show him I care because I know how it feels to wonder if someone actually cares about you...And- and the texting! I want to talk to him! By any means, even if it means sending a stupid photo, I want to let him know, hey! I enjoy talking with you! You're...you're amazing..." Connor's eyes were getting misty, "And I've told him this but I don't think he gets it..."

"Well, communication is key for a relationship, Con." Chris sat up, "Talk to him."

"How?" Connor looked up at Chris as he pointed at the door.

"The...walls are thin..." Kevin cleared his throat as Chris gave a shit-eating grin and wink to Connor before exiting the room.

Connor's face went a crimson red as Kevin entered the room, shutting the door quietly behind him, "I'm assuming he's heading to Church's room..." He commented as he sat down a foot away beside Connor.

Connor covered his face with his hands, "How much?"

"I heard all of it." Kevin smiled sheepishly and awkwardly.

"That's...not exactly how I wanted to talk to you about this.." Connor grimaced.

"So..., talk to me now." Kevin shrugged, "You're obviously going through things and that's effecting how you're...feeling, I mean- I thought we had a nice night-"

"I thought so too!" Connor cut in.

"So, what's the problem...? You- know, I care about you, right?"

The question that had been on Connor's mind for ages was finally given a chance to see daylight, "Do you care about me? The way I care about you?"

Kevin looked appalled by this, "Oh my- Connor! That's- that's idiotic!"

Connor lowered his head.

Kevin caught his mistake and shook his head, "No- I mean- what are you thinking? Of course I care about you!"

Connor let out a quiet sob that had been held back for awhile now, "What was I supposed to think? How was I supposed to feel, Kevin?"

Kevin's eyes went round with confusion, not having to deal with this before.

Connor quickly wiped his eyes, looking as if he was about to get up, "I should go."

"N-no, stay." Kevin shook his head.

"Why?" Connor scoffed.

"Because, I-"

"I like you so much, Kevin, you have no idea- you don't even know the half of it! You're- you're an amazingly talented person and-" Connor scoffed again, "You're funny and you're previously adorable, your hair is- it's- it's perfect, and-"

"Why do you sound so angry?" Kevin winced, the words not matching the tone.

"Because you don't get it!" Connor threw his hands up, "How can someone so- so perfect actually like someone like me?" Connor seemed to freeze when he said this, not even he himself knowing this had been the thing troubling him.

"Oh my gosh, Connor..." Kevin whispered.

"This is so stupid." Connor buried his face in his hands.

There was an awkward tick of silence before Connor felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Why didn't you tell me you were feeling like this?" Kevin frowned.

"How was I supposed to feel comfortable with that?" Connor laughed sarcastically.

"It's me."

"Exactly."

Kevin scooted closer to Connor before putting an arm over his shoulder and pulling him closer, "I don't know why you don't think of yourself as more than perfect."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You said you didn't know why someone as perfect as me would be with you as if to imply that you aren't perfect." Kevin pointed out, "Connor, you're astounding."

Connor's face grew a dark shade of red.

"Please, don't ever doubt that."

"I...can try." Connor murmured.

Kevin smiled as Connor leaned his head gently against his shoulder.
They sat there like that for what felt like ages, until they could both come to terms with their personal issues, and of course when Connor fell asleep on Kevin's shoulder.