Declan

Declan tried to focus on the positives of holding Lux's hand. Like the way it made his heart trip giddily in his chest, or the sense of peace touching her gave him. But his mind insisted on focusing on how hand had changed since he'd last held it. Bones and grip once strong, now frail and weak. Her steps were steady but slower than he remembered. She was a ghost of the girl he'd danced with next to the fire.

Her earlier suggestion haunted him, and it tempted him to gather her in his arms and rush her back to his room. The very thought went against everything he'd been taught, but if there was even in the smallest chance that it would save her, he'd ask for forgiveness later. And if it didn't- well then, he'd be thankful for every moment he had to love her before cruel fate tore her away.

"They're still going at it," she wheezed when they reached the front door of the main house. Raised voices reverberated within. Lux looked more than a little reluctant to go inside, but she set her jaw in that determined way he loved, the one that wrinkled her nose and furrowed her brows, and twisted the doorknob.

"Bella, he stands against everything we fought for in the Uprising!" Phoebe's voice exploded through the house, the direction indicating they were in the kitchen.

"Oh my lord, Mama! First off, there is no we- we weren't even born- and second, I've told you a hundred times, Gideon wasn't part of the Fallen. He fought for the gods!"

"So he says. I just think it's a little too convenient that he shows up when the gateways are the weakest they've ever been, and he has a miracle cure for Lux!"

Declan froze. Lux tugged on his hand, gesturing towards the stairs with her chin, her eyes wide in her face. "Please, let's go before they see us."

"Did you not hear what they just said?" he hissed, refusing to move. "A cure."

"I want no part of that cure," she said darkly, releasing his hand and starting up the stairs.

"Wait- they told you what it is?" He followed her.

"No, I just Know that it's not right."

"Lux, if it can buy us time," Declan pleaded, spinning her around when they reached the next floor, "we have to consider it. I will not lose you over something like this."

Her gray eyes clouded. "But you would lose me all the same if we took what Gideon was offering."

Groaning, he let her go. How could he make her understand that he would take her in any form- as long as she was alive. That was what mattered most to him. The rattle of silverware drifted to the second floor as a hand slapped down on the dining room table.

"Are you going to come with me or go to them?" Lux asked. She'd stopped, her hand resting against the wall in a spot that made his mouth dry out. It was a coincidence. It had to be.

"Always you," he answered, hoping she missed the hitch in his words. She nodded, turned and pressed her other palm against the wall. The click that sounded ricocheted in his chest, thrusting him back a hundred years ago when he'd helped fashion the spell to hide her room. He didn't speak again until they were standing in Leora's room.

"How did you find this?"

"It's more like it found me. I could hear them laughing, and my magic showed me the way. Why was it hidden?"

Declan crossed the room and sat on the bed, his head going into his hands as memories overwhelmed him. He could smell Leora- she always smelled like the outside: sun warmed, fresh grass and flowers. He could hear her humming slightly off key in her sweet soprano.

His fingers gripped the thin coverlet on the bed. He could feel her- the way she'd fit in his arms while he comforted her. He could taste her- that moment had almost ruined the friendship they'd so painstakingly restored after he'd made it clear he wasn't interested in her. Not in that way, but they were both hurting. His guard was lowered, and she'd twisted his intentions and pressed her mouth against his.

Shame consumed him. He'd been a randy teenage boy with battle lust raging in his blood, his body betraying his heart and mind as he'd greedily taken what she'd offered. He could still see the moonlight on her blonde hair as he laid her down on the bed. Her breasts had peaked and strained against her thin nightgown. Her sighs and whimpers had spurred him on, but the fumbling fingers at his waistband brought him back to his senses.

He didn't blame her for how she lashed out at him. If anyone discovered how far they'd almost gone, the only thing that would save her was her last name and her powers. There were men who would marry "damaged goods" just to say they'd married a Godelieve woman. And he would've been cast aside and exiled. But how much of that did Lux know?

She would never believe she wasn't just a replacement for Leora if he told her the truth. But while he wouldn't deny that Leora had been an attractive girl, he'd never yearned for her the way he'd yearned for Lux. Besides that one moment of weakness, he'd never considered abandoning his morals and magic for Leora. He looked at the woman tearing his insides apart, and he knew if she tried the same thing as her ancestor had, he would give in.

"What have you been doing up here?" he asked, curious now that he was free from the onslaught of emotions this place conjured.

"This," she said, reaching under a pillow and pulling out a book. "Leora kept a journal."

"We looked for this everywhere," he breathed, taking the diary with shaking hands. He flipped open to the first page, and the sight of her gentle flowing script brought tears to his eyes. "Did you find anything else?"

"Just a jewe-"

"What is this room?"

Declan and Lux scrambled off the bed and stared at the adults pouring into the room. Phoebe looked about the place with bright eyes. Bella appeared too angry to be intrigued. Gideon- well, the poor man just looked resigned.

"I've been all over this property and never found this place," Phoebe murmured, running fingers across the floral print covering the walls.

"Mama, you're purposely trying to distract us from our purpose," Bella snapped.

"Because I don't agree with you," the older woman snarled.

"It doesn't matter. Lux is MY- our child, and we think this is best for her."

A sliver of hope grew in Declan's heart, though Lux's warning echoed in his mind. They were going to press her to take their solution, and she would refuse. But maybe he could convince her- he could use their love as leverage, and damn if he didn't hate himself for his willingness to do that to her. But he wouldn't lose her. He couldn't.

                                           *******************************************

Lux

"No." Lux grew tired of repeating the word, but no one could comprehend the single syllable. Even Declan, who she expected to support her after the conversation they'd had downstairs, was on their side.

"Lux, please consider this. It will buy us until we can find your channeling stone," Mama implored, tears pooling in eyes that matched her daughter's. "Look at you. You're a wraith, wasting away to nothing. I'll not stand by and watch you die."

"Listen to your mother," Gideon said. He reached out to grasp Mama's hand, earning a raised eyebrow from Lux. Part of her understood it wasn't his fault he hadn't been around, but the other part balked against his attempts to play daddy after years of being absent.

"I am listening, but I'm not agreeing," she stated, her voice flat. "I would rather die as myself than live as something I'm not. This isn't up for discussion. You've already said that the process requires willingness from the caster and the subject. I'm not willing."

"Lux," Declan reached for, but she pulled away. "He said they could undo it."

"But what if the person I become doesn't want to undo it? All the things that drive me, all the emotions that make me human, will be gone. That means I'm not going to see the point of restoring that part of me. Why don't you see that?"

She grabbed the journal and pushed her way to the stairs. Gideon grasped her by the shoulder. She could feel the magic coursing from his hands into her body. Like called to like, and her own power rose to greet his. But the moment the forces touch, she stiffened, her eyes flaring silver. Shoving her hand into his chest, she pushed out with her magic and threw him across the room.

"Lux," Memaw shouted, her face going pale as Mama ran to Gideon's side. "What on earth?"

"Do you deny that you just tried to coerce me using magic?" Lux thundered.

"No," he grunted, holding his left side as they helped him to his feet. "But you are being unreasonable. I just found you, and I would like the chance to get to know you."

"All I'm hearing is what each of you wants, and none of you are considering what I want. This is my life. Let me live it."

She made it down the stairs before staggering to the wall to catch her breath. Such a small use of magic depleted most of the good Declan's presence had done. Her soul couldn't handle much more. Glancing behind her, she wondered if she might be wrong in refusing, but the thought was fleeting. Taking Gideon's offer would only bring down ruin and destruction.

Footsteps sounded on the stairs, and she fled. If they saw her so out of breath, they'd never relent, and her fight was failing. She stepped outside and saw her friends lounging about the yard, their spell casting ended. Sara Elizabeth was picking blades of grass and flicking them into Kitty's hair while she snoozed in the sun. Audra was putting Brooke through what appeared to be self-defense basics.

"Hey Lux."

She spun to see Ruby sitting on the porch swing, her short legs dangling above the ground. Always quiet, she'd been even more withdrawn since the incident with the demons. Her makeup looked slept in, and the beginnings of dingy blonde roots were showing in her hair.

"Hey Ruby, you okay?" She tucked the journal on her lap as she joined the fire witch on the swing. A sigh escaped her lips as her weary body rejoiced.

"I should ask you that. You look awful."

"You really want to go there blondie?"

Ruby's hands flew to her scalp, and a grimace twisted her lips. "I knew I should've brought my color with me."

"You'd think there'd be a spell for that," Lux joked, closing her eyes and leaning her head back as they rocked.

"There are some potions you can make that will alter your hair color, but they're beyond my skill level. And honestly kind of pointless at the moment, but I found a cool charm I'd like to try one day."

"Oh," Lux perked up, surprised by the other girl's enthusiasm. Ruby never got excited about anything.

"Yes, I found it in one of the books in the shop. Apparently, with the help of a sorcerer, a witch can charm an object so you can change your appearance. Most witches use jewelry. How cool would that be?"

"Would you want to be someone else?" Lux asked, realizing for the first time how little she knew about the girls in the Circle-outside of Kitty. She'd not even realized Ruby had hazel eyes; she'd never spared her more than a fleeting glance.

Ruby scraped at the black polish on her nails and mumbled, "I mean, sometimes. Doesn't everyone want to be someone else at some point or another?"

Lux looked at the leather-bound book resting on her legs. As much as Leora loved her family and being a witch, Lux got the distinct impression that she would've given up all the power and magic to have a simpler life. The girl never wanted to lead, and that life ended up killing her. She rubbed the soreness beneath her breast. How much would their lives echo each other in the end?

"Yes, I guess we do. Ruby-" she began, a thought striking her. How stupid could she have been to have never asked the girl before? "How long have you worked at Amulets? Were you there the day Corinne came by?"

"Why? You think I had something to do with it? You going to accuse me like you accused Sara Elizabeth?"

"Whoa," Lux exclaimed, throwing her hands up. Once more, the girl surprised her with the ferocity of her emotion. "It never even occurred to me. I just remembered you helped us that day, and I wondered if you'd looked into it."

Ruby crossed her arms. "No. Corinne had been missing for about a week when I started working there. Didn't even know she'd been by there until Brooke said something. Ms. Dee is pretty private. Doesn't gossip much or tell me anything more than when I'm supposed to work."

"Ms. Dee? Was she there the day we were there?"

Ruby hopped off the swing, the chains jangling and jerking the seat and making Lux feel sick. "She was, but only cause I was fairly new. Most of the time, she's gone when I'm there. She used to run the place by herself, inherited it from her grandmother, but she said it's gotten too much for her to handle alone."

"Is Ms. Dee a witch?"

"I don't think so- at least not a natural one. I never bothered to ask. My mama made me promise to keep our magic to ourselves."

"Y'all didn't bind your powers with the others?"

"What's with the twenty questions all of a sudden?"

"I just think it's important we know each other if we're gonna be a part of this Circle." She pressed her hand on the diary. "We're family."

"Ruby, come on! Breaks over," Audra hollered. The petite redhead was waving her hand overhead, snapping her fingers.

"She's going to be the death of me," Ruby groaned and started down the steps.

"Hey," Lux called. "Thanks for talking with me. I didn't mean to make it sound like I was interrogating you."

The corner of her lip twitched but never made it to a full smile. The girl shrugged and rolled her eyes. "I'd say anytime, but I'm not sure I'd mean it."

"Ruby! You're wasting daylight."

"Good grief, I'm coming!" She broke into a smooth jog. The weeks of training were showing in her speed and smooth gait.

Lux risked a peek at the front door. No one had followed her out, for which she was grateful, but she'd have to go back inside, eventually. She could spend the night at the guesthouse. She didn't think it would take too much prodding to get Declan onboard with her plan for salvation. It's not like they didn't both want each other.

Opening the diary, she whispered, "Until then, let's see what trouble you were getting into Leora."

                                   ****************************************************

"You're sure?" The girl wouldn't meet her eyes, but she nodded.

Dusk fell on the Godelieve estate, the cooler evening air sweeping in with the stars and stirring up memories she thought she'd discarded. She'd wanted to avoid returning, but all paths led her here. Light filled the right window on the top floor. Leora's room. An ache fluttered in her chest, but she pushed it away. She hadn't mourned then; she wouldn't start now.

"I need you to get that journal from her. I need to see if she wrote where she hid the stone, and I need to know what she says about me. Do you understand me?"

"Does it matter? The Gateways will open regardless. Lux doesn't have a channeling stone. She's dying."

The teen girl's voice broke on the last word, making the woman frown. She'd thought the girl was over that hurdle, that she understood the danger Lux represented. "I haven't waited for a century for this moment for you to ruin everything, and I need not remind you of what's at stake if you speak of this to anyone. Do I?"

"N-no," the girl spluttered. "I'll do what I can, but she hasn't let it out of her sight."

"I'm not asking you to try. I'm asking you to succeed. I'm not nearly as concerned about the Gateways as I am about finding out where Leora hid her channeling stone. I need that stone."

"But you have so many already. And you don't even need to use them!"

She grabbed the girl by the throat, her fingernails digging into the soft flesh. So young. So innocent. "I see you've got a little spirit. I can appreciate a little, but show too much and I'll snuff it out."

"Yes, ma'am."

She released the girl. The young witch grabbed her throat and drew in deep, shuddering breaths. "Oh, you're so damn dramatic. You can either bring me the journal, or I can take it from your friend's cold, dead hands."