This chapter may contain self harm and gore. Viewers discretion is advised. 

The wind blew in from the window and the fresh air circulated the area. The room was quiet and peaceful, there were no sounds or movement . The only moving item in the room was a young boy, stressing out and fearing for his life. Jie Jie sat on the floor in his room, his eyes crowded with tears and his vision partly blurry. His sister was confirmed dead the night before and his mother had a stroke and was sent to the hospital.

There was nothing left for Jie Jie to hold on to, was it his mom, his dad or his sister. They were all gone and nothing was left. The only thing Jie Jie could do was blame himself.

– If i wasn't Gay none of this would have happened.

– If i wasn't weak none of this would have happened.

The fear which enveloped round his brain made him want to vomit. Now the only thing he could hold on to was Kousu. He needed to protect Kousu no matter what. Even if it meant his death as long as Kousu was still safe and alive.

He stood up from the floor and went over to check on Kousu. Jie Jie already knew about Kousu and Sai's fight. Although he wasn't sure of what caused it, he could tell Kousu wasn't going to be the same.

The door to the Kousu room was open but there was a continuous squealing coming from the room. It sounded like a sharp item cutting a soft item. The noise got louder and louder by the second and even though Jie Jie was afraid to go in. He shook his fears away and walked into the room.

In the room Kousu was seated with his legs crossed and his chair shifted to a corner in which no one could see his face. The squealing noise was coming from Kousu's corner. The continuous scrapping and squealing only got louder and Jie Jie decided to check what the noise was coming from. He moved closer to Kousu and tiptoed without making a sound and when he was close enough he was spooked by the sight. Blood filled Kousu's white robe, a knife was in his hand and all over his arms were cuts made by himself. Kousu had been self harming himself. The red ruby eyes Kousu once had was dull and brown, his bright smile was covered with a nasty depressed face and under his eyes were filled with black bags.

Kousu already noticed Jie Jie but ignored him and continued scraping his skin. It didn't hurt but only tickled Kousu, he had witnessed worse injuries than this. This was just a scratch to him. He had been burnt once, shot once and even stabbed and there were still more he had undertaken.

Jie Jie stared at it with fear in his eyes, this time he truly wanted to vomit. If there was one thing Jie Jie hated the sight of; it was blood. Anytime Jie Jie saw blood only bad things happened. Blood was one of Jie Jie's many weaknesses.

The Blood dripped down Kousu's long robes and flooded down his legs. They ran down like raindrops falling on a glass window. Making a tapping sound anytime it reached the ground.

In fear Jie Jie took the knife away from Kousu and shouted. " You! Why are you doing this.. Do you know you are killing yourself...Kousu!"

Kousu glared at Jie Jie but his soul piercing eyes were gone and all that was left was bleary eyes. " Jie Jie...Ha....It's really nice to see you haven't run away yet. Am I not creepy?..Look at me....Peeling my own skin....And it doesn't even hurt...Ha...Jie Jie it's almost time for my death..What makes it special is that it's happening on my birthday...But don't worry Jie Jie i will make sure to deal with Do Jin before i go..."

Jie Jie glared at Kousu with teary eyes. He was unsure of what to do, he never thought Kousu was going through so much pain and yet hiding it so well it could hardly even be noticed.

To the point that Kousu thought death was the only way out of his misery. Jie Jie had always been afraid of Kousu but now he wondered if the powerful Soul Catcher was truly as fearless as everyone said.

Kousu forced a smile and stood up, his clothes still dripping with blood and his hands still shaking with fear. He walked over to Jie Jie and placed his hand on Jie Jie's forehead before resting his head on Jie Jie's shoulder. " I know you kissed me that day. But I pretended not to notice because I wanted to see Sai's reaction...If you like me Jie Jie then that's the worst mistake anyone could ever make. The only thing I am good at is making people suffer. So Jie Jie love someone else."

Kousu let go of Jie Jie and went over to the bathroom to clean the blood of himself. But he left Jie Jie shocked, Kousu knew about the kiss but acted like nothing ever happened. And Kousu wasn't even mad that he had taken advantage of him. Jie Jie was puzzled and he wondered what kind of human Kousu was.

No matter how Kousu acted he always showed his weak side, the emotional part of him which he had tried so well to hide. The only thing which truly gave Kousu peace of mind was a cold shower and self harming himself. Even if he tried to sleep he couldn't, Kousu couldn't even remember the last time he truly fell asleep all he did on the bed was to turn around and let the souls of the people he had killed haunt him and give him nightmares. Those moments he fell asleep he would be woken by a disturbing dream or he would be choked in his dreams. It was something Kousu grew to understand. And that was until he was truly dead. He could never find peace.