At the park entrance, (Y/n), Mordecai and Rigby are hosing the grass. "And then I'll live in a mansion with fast internet." Rigby said. "How fast?" (Y/n) teased playfully. "Faster than you!" Rigby sprays at her legs. "Whoa! Haha! Watch it!" (Y/n) said, and Mordecai laughs, but then Rigby aims the hose at him. "Hey!" Anna comes driving in her car. "Beep beep! Yo! My horn is broken, let's go! BEEEEEP!" Anna said. "Oh, Anna's here early. Hey, can you both cover for me so we can go hang out?" Mordecai asked. "Sure, man." Rigby takes Mordecai's hose.

"Cool." Mordecai said. He waves and walks off. "Double fisted!" He makes shooting sounds while spraying with the hoses and (Y/n) laughs. Later (Y/n), Mordecai and Rigby are picking up garbage. "Stab! Stab! Stab! Stab!" The trio said. "Oh, hey dudes. Sorry about this. I'm taking Anna to see that Swedish movie with the crying, so...." Mordecai said. "Oh, okay." (Y/n) said. "Well, have fun." Rigby said. Mordecai gives (Y/n) his garbage picker and runs off. "I probably won't. It's pretty cerebral and really sad!" Rigby and (Y/n) share a glance and go back to picking rubbish. "Stab. Stab." The duo said. Later (Y/n), Mordecai and Rigby are wiping the windows. "Hey, uh, sorry, but...." Mordecai said. "Yeah, yeah, we got it." (Y/n) said. Mordecai gives her his napkin. "Great!" He leaves. "Wipe, wipe, wipe!" Rigby said.

~time skip~

Benson talks to Rigby, (Y/n), Muscle Man, Fives, Pops and Skips. "So, if anyone has any leads on this issue, there is a $12 reward." Benson said. Mordecai goes to him. "Oh, maybe Mordecai has some insight on who's been wrapping the public toilet seats with plastic wrap." Benson said, and (Y/n) snickers. "Sorry I'm late. I was moving Anna's couch." Mordecai said. "Oh ho ho! I guess Anna's the remote in that relationship, because she's the one with all the control!

Does anyone want me to explain? Do we get it?" Muscle Man asked. "We get it." Benson said. "I'm afraid I don't quite-" Pops said. "We get it! It's a good thing you're here. I'm gonna need you to help Rigby and (Y/n) change the lightbulbs." Benson said. "Oh we can do that ourselves." Rigby said. "Well (Y/n) for sure, but you? Not a chance." Benson said. "Yeah, I can! I help all the time!" Rigby said, and everyone laughs except for (Y/n). "Why are you laughing?!" Rigby asked. "Bro, without Mordecai or (Y/n), you'd be totally useless." Muscle Man said. "Wha-" Rigby said. (Y/n) stands up angrily. "That's not true! Rigby's just as capable as we are! In fact, he's been doing more work than Mordecai lately!" (Y/n) shouted. Everyone seemed surprised by her outburst.

"Thank you, (Y/n). Come on, Mordecai, tell him how useful I am." Rigby said. "Uhh...yeah, I mean, you're fun." Mordecai said. "Fun? Fun?! Are you serious?" (Y/n) asked. "Whoa (Y/n), chill bro." Muscle Man said. "No, tell him I'm useful!" Rigby said. "Yeah, you're my friend." Mordecai said. "Why aren't you saying the word useful?!" Rigby asked. "Well, I mean there was the time with the chairs, the limousine, the pretzel. You're basically the opposite of useful pretty much anytime we do anything." Mordecai said. "But we did those things together!" Rigby said.

"He has a point, Mordecai. You're really throwing him under the bus here!" (Y/n) said. "But I mean, he was there. And you were too, (Y/n)." Mordecai said. Her eyes widen with rage, "What?! So are you saying I'm not useful now too?!" She asked. "What about all those times we've covered for you and Anna?" Rigby asked. "Well, I mean, it's the least you could do." Mordecai said. "The least...we could.....I quit." Rigby said.

"What?" Mordecai and (Y/n) asked in surprise. "I quit! I can get a paycheck anywhere!" Rigby said. Everyone laughs at Rigby again except (Y/n). "Quit laughing at him! You guys are just being a bunch of-" "don't say it!" Benson gives her a warning glare. "No, I'd like to know what she was about to say."  Mordecai said. "Me too, bro." Muscle Man said. "Assholes." (Y/n) growled. "Language!" Benson snapped. Mordecai scoffs, and ignores that insult and turns to Rigby. "Dude, you can't get a job without me. It's my references that got you this job in the first place." He said.

"Reference this! I'm gonna go out and get a job, and I'm gonna make money at that job. And that money's gonna come in the form of a check. And that check's gonna be in an envelope, and the envelope's gonna be sealed, and I'm gonna rub that sealed envelope all up in your face, Mordecai! PEACE!" Rigby makes a raspberry noise from the park all the way to the Local Temp Agency. "Do you have any openings for someone who wants to rub something in his friend's face?" Rigby asked.

"Oh sure, we have a variety of positions for anyone with a college diploma." The lady said. "I never went to college." Rigby said. The lady puts away some documents. "Well there's still some for high school graduates." She said. "I never graduated high school." Rigby said. The lady puts away a large stack of documents again. "Well, as long as you have a driver's license." Rigby remains silent. The woman puts away the last stack of documents. "Well...there is this one....." She said. "As long as I'm getting a paycheck I'm doing it!" Rigby said.

"Alright." She gives Rigby a card. "Hmmmm....." Rigby looks at the "Lift with your back" card. He goes to the Lift With Your Back Co. "The name's Manny, this here's my moving company, I built it with my back up! We got everything you need here. Cardboard boxes, packing peanuts, packing tape..... Turn around." Manny said. "What?" Rigby asked. Manny twirls his finger, and Rigby turns around, showing his single butt cheek.  "Hmmm.... you only got one butt cheek, you don't have much of a back on you. But we need as many backs as we can get for this next job." Manny said.

"Okay? What should I do?" Rigby asked. "Just load up on the back of that truck with the other flunkies." Rigby enters the back of the truck, one of the guys closes the back. "Alright you crum-bums! We got a seven bedroom doghouse we gotta move in an hour! I don't want to hear any of your backtalk out of you backblisters, or you're back on the street! Now keep up the good work! I respect the heck out of ya!" Manny said. Rigby lifts one of the boxes. "Whoa there in your back! What do you think you're doing? You gotta lift with your back!" Manny said. "What? Really?" Rigby asked. "We are called "Lift with your back" for a reason. Are you trying to ruin my brand? Let me show you how it's done kid." Manny removes his shirt and lifts the box, revealing a six pack on his back. "Eughhh! uhh...." Rigby sees other workers, they too have abs on their back.

"You want that paycheck? Lift with your back!" Manny said. "Uhhh...." Rigby lifts a box and walks at the front door. "C'mon what are you doing kid? Don't use the front door! Use the back door!" Manny said. " But it's twice as far!" Rigby said. "What are you trying to ruin my brand? Get back there!" Rigby grumbles, and then lifts the box and walks to the back door. "Hm. That kid's got heart."

At night, Rigby tiredly walks towards his bed, and lies his head on it. "Oh, there you are! I knew you were faking earlier. (Y/n)'s been looking everywhere for you, dude," Mordecai said. "She has? Oh... I'll talk to her later. Does this look like the back of a faker?" Rigby shows his back, and Mordecai ignores him. "Look, I need you and (Y/n) to cover for me again. Anna''s half birthday party is tomorrow and it's pretty important." Mordecai said. "What? Are you serious?!" Rigby asked. "Yeah, C'mon man! You slacked off your whole life! Can I just have this?" Mordecai said.

"No! You have things all the time! Player 1, the bed, punchies, a diploma, a girlfriend?!" Rigby asked. "Oh Jeez, is this what this is about? It's not my fault you're still too much of a coward to ask (Y/n) out!" Mordecai said. There was a long silence after that. 'Fuck...' Mordecai thought to himself. He knew he messed up with that one. "Look Rigby I-" "you're hardly one to talk! It took you as long as it took me just to tell her you love her! And you still do, don't you? In fact, I know that's why you're dating her sister! Because you know that (Y/n) will NEVER love you the way you love her so her sister is and will be the closest thing to (Y/n) you'll ever get!"

Rigby shouted furiously. There was more long silence after that. Probably Mordecai fully taking in what Rigby said. Mordecai sighs. "You're right, I do still love her. But I'm over her, Rigby. She made it clear that she doesn't like us. At least, she doesn't like me. Thomas on the other hand..." Mordecai said. "Ha! YOU'RE over (Y/n)? Allow me to put on my "skepticals." Rigby makes circles around his eyes with his fingers. "Whooop!" Rigby said. "I've moved on, Rigby. Okay?" Mordecai asked. "Fine, but this isn't just about her, she and I have helped you with a lot! And you never even thanked us!" Rigby shouted. "Of course I did! I think I did?" Mordecai said. "4 days Mordecai, 4 days till I rub that paycheck all up in your sorry face!" Rigby shouted.

Benson walks in. "Oh, uh, Rigby. You're still here." Benson clears his throat. "As you know, room and board is for employees only, and we kinda need the space for this old dot matrix printer." Skips pushes in a dot matrix printer. Rigby shakes and sheds a tear. "FINE! MAYBE I'LL STAY IN A FOUR-STAR HOTEL! WITH A POOL!" Rigby said. "Oh, with the paycheck you earned, in the sealed envelope?" Benson sneered. "Yes, in the sealed envelope!" Rigby shouted. The lift with your back truck is beside the four-star hotel. "Huh, four more days." Rigby said. "Your back, you gotta use your back!" Manny said. Rigby walks into the coffee shop to meet up with (Y/n). "Ah, my back!" He shouted. "How was Day Two?" (Y/n) asked.

"All this backbreaking labor is killing my back. I don't know if I can live with my back all week. Maybe I should just take my old job back." Rigby said. (Y/n) massages his back. "Why do you keep saying "back"?" She asked. "It's all I hear all day!" Rigby shouted. "I don't mean to sound harsh, but this seems like a toxic work environment. Your back's all mangled and ropey." (Y/n) cracks Rigby's back. "Thanks- OW!" Rigby shouted. "Quit squirming. Doesn't your boss know to lift with your legs? That's-- That's, like, Hauling and Packing 101!" (Y/n) said. "Yeah, I don't know what his deal is, but he keeps saying I've got heart or something." Rigby said. "Then that's the one thing upon which we agree. You've got heart, Rigby, and in three days, you'll have a paycheck too." (Y/n) said. Rigby smiles. "Can you get me a cup of coffee?" Rigby asked. "You got $1.50?" (Y/n) asked.

~time skip~

"Now, today's gonna be a big day, and some of you schnooks are looking a little back-bottomed, so I'm gonna play the company song to get your backs on track!" Manny said. Music plays, and Rigby is lifting more boxes, and the other three workers are shown to be impressed. Rigby is later shown in a truck, marking the third day off. The next day, (Y/n) is shown massaging Rigby's back, when Mordecai calls him on his phone.

Rigby throws his phone into an opened box labeled "trash cans". Rigby continues to lift even more boxes. (Y/n) looks at Rigby, worried. Rigby is in the truck again, circling the dollar sign, indicating it's payday. "Alright, you pickle pouches, time for your back pay! Joe! Murray! Rorschach! Rigby!" Manny lifts the letter higher. "Ah!" He shouted. "Hey, what the heck man?! I've been doing your lame back stuff all week! Now pay up!" Rigby shouted. "Oh, you'll get your paycheck." Manny folds the letter into a plane, puts it on his back, and launches it all the way back in a loaded truck. "Hey, what gives?!" Rigby asked.

"Tell him Murray." Manny said. "Hello, Rigby." Murray said. "Murray." Rigby said. "It's kind of company tradition that on your first paycheck, you get to move a full truck by yourself." Murray said. "What?! Are you serious?!" Rigby asked. "Hey, my back is tied. You want the paycheck, you move the boxes!" Rigby grumbles, and walks to the loaded truck, and surprised by the number of boxes he has to move.

A cart approaches Rigby, with (Y/n) and Mordecai sitting in it, they walk towards Rigby. "Ugh! (Y/n), why'd you bring that guy here?" Rigby asked. "Cause we're all friends, and we always support each other." She said. "Dude, come on, you don't have to go through all this to prove a point. You got to stop, man. Let us help." Mordecai said. "No, I'm doing it myself!" Rigby said. "You're just gonna hurt your back, dude!" Mordecai said. "Can't be worse than when you stabbed it!" Rigby snapped. "What? Come on." Mordecai said. "You think the only things (Y/n) and I are useful for is being your chumps!"

Rigby imitates Mordecai. "Rigby, help me get a girlfriend!", "Let me borrow your time machine, Rigby!", "(Y/n), cover for me and Anna!". All you do is use us, man." Rigby said. "But I never asked you to do those things. Okay, maybe the last part..." "Of course you didn't!" Rigby sighs. "We helped 'cause you're our friend." Rigby said. " Then let us- me help you." Mordecai said.

"No! This is my job, and I gotta unload this truck." Rigby walks back into the moving truck and picks up his first box. The abs on his back start growing, freaking out Mordecai and (Y/n). Rigby keeps gasping for breath as Manny laughs, but a determined Rigby continues to unload the truck. Rigby then sees his next box is filled with sand, and when he goes to lift it, something cracks inside him. Manny nods his head at Rigby, when Murray walks up to him. "You gotta stop this, boss. You're killing him!" Manny slaps Murray in the face, and grabs his shirt. "He's making me proud out there. I love that kid like he was my own flesh and back." Rigby throws the sand box onto the ground.

He takes a sigh of relief before turning to see his final box, filled with cast-iron sand. His paycheck is in the back of the box. Determined, Rigby runs over and goes to lift the box, struggling. He can't seem to get it off the ground. "Rigby!" (Y/n) shouted worriedly. "Rigby! Stop! You're never gonna walk again!" Mordecai shouted.

Rigby continues to try and lift the box, straining his muscles. "Rigby, enough of this! I know you're useful, now lift with your back so you can get that paycheck!" (Y/n) shouted. Rigby starts to lift the box from the bottom, with his back. A six pack is suddenly formed on his back, almost possessing Rigby, as he finally carries the box out of the truck. "Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!" Everybody gasps as Rigby reaches the end of the truck, and he chucks the box onto the ground.

Everyone cheers for him as his paycheck floats into his hand. Rigby loses his possession and starts to deflate as he holds the check. Murray walks over to him. "Rigby, you're the worst worker I've ever had, and you're like a son to me." Murray said. "I...quit...I'm going back to my real job." Rigby said. Murray seems sad. "You'll...you'll be back!" Murray walks off, as Mordecai and (Y/n) walk in. " That was so awesome, dude! You were all like-"
Mordecai does an impression of Rigby lifting the box. "Hehe, yeah. But did you see when I was like-" Rigby does an impression of himself throwing the box onto the ground. They both continue to make impressions, as (Y/n) watches them. Mordecai and Rigby both laugh. "But seriously, dude. I was taking you both for granted, thanks for helping me all the time." Mordecai said. "So the conflict's been mediated?" (Y/n) asked. "I just gotta do one more thing..." Rigby said. "What's that?" Mordecai asked. Rigby very weakly stands up and tries to rub the paycheck in Mordecai's face. "In your faaaaa-faaaa-" he said. "Do you need some help, dude?" (Y/n) asked.