[45] You idiot

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"I-I don't - I don't understand." Hunk said quietly. It was the first thing anybody had said on their return to the Castle, and Keith didn't even look up at the sound of his voice. "I mean- I mean, if Shiro was... was gone, there'd be a body, right? He wouldn't just disappear like that, there... there's gotta be some explanation."

"At first I thought the blood might be someone else's, and Shiro had to fight them off," Pidge's voice lacked all its usual enthusiasm as she sat curled up in her seat, glasses pushed up into her hair. "So I analysed it, but..."

"He- he still could have survived though, right?"

Pidge shook her head, pulling her arms around her. "Not without grievous, or fatal injuries."

Keith squeezed his eyes shut against the tears threatening to make a reappearance. "Can we not talk about this?" He said, voice cracking more than he had intended.

He felt sick, pools of blood imprinted on the back of his eyelids. A mangled mass of metal. The Black Lion standing vigil over the scene, silent.

Keith stood abruptly, avoiding his teammates gaze by staring at his feet.

"Hey, where are you--"

"Room." He muttered, walking quickly. He stared at his feet all the while, knowing that Hunk and Pidge were sharing concerned glances.

As soon as the door to the bridge shut behind him, Keith slid to the floor, back against a wall. He rested his forehead against his knees, letting out a shaky breath.

This wasn't how it was meant to be.

A tear slid down Keith's nose, and he didn't make a move to brush it away. It would be too much energy that he didn't have. Instead, it dropped onto his jeans, immediately getting soaked up. Another followed soon after, and he moved to press his eyes into his knees.

"Keith?"

Keith stiffened at the sound of his name. "Yeah?" He winced at how rough his voice sounded, unseen by the princess.

There was the sound of rustling fabric as she sat down next to him. "How are you..." she audibly blanched. "Sorry, insensitive question. I... we are all worried for you."

Not like he didn't know that already.

"We have no way to find Lance or the Blue Lion, and now we have Black, but no Paladin."

Keith wondered how she could keep talking like they were only minor setbacks, but he still didn't bring his head up from his knees.

"I carry the burden of my entire home planet being destroyed." Allura said quietly, and Keith belatedly realised he had said that out loud. "But for the sake of the universe, I have to be strong. A princess of a place no longer on the star charts is not going to save them from the terrors of the Galra."

"Your strength isn't going to bring Shiro and Lance back either..." Keith mumbled bitterly.

"That is true," Allura said with a sigh. "But I don't think all hope is lost."

"We're missing our leader-" Keith's throat closed up, and he lifted his head, resting back against the wall.

The pools of blood still flashed behind his eyelids.

"We're missing-" he paused to clear his throat. "two teammates. Why don't you think this is hopeless?"

Instead of answering his question, Allura rested a hand on his shoulder. Keith couldn't be bothered brushing it off, staring at the ceiling and fighting back tears again.

"I wanted to tell everyone at once..." she said slowly.

"If it's about finding a new Paladin, I don't want to hear it."

Allura let out a surprised laugh at how sharp Keith's tone was. "Oh- oh no Keith, it's quite the opposite. It's kind of why I'm- well, why I'm not giving up just yet."

He finally turned to look at her, not missing the bright spark in her rainbow-flecked eyes. "What is it?"

"Maybe we should head back onto the bridge, so I can tell everyone at once."

Keith frowned. "I don't..." he trailed off, uncertain. "No."

He didn't miss the concern on Allura's face. "Alright. So, I was in the Black Lion, searching for any more clues about Shiro's..." she hesitated. "Disappearance."

Keith slouched again, chin resting on his knees as he wrapped his arms around them. "Unless you found—" he broke off, not wanting to say it. Unless you found a body.

"I found something wonderful, Keith," Allura squeezed his shoulder, the smile audible in her voice. "Something you will not believe."

Keith stared at her from the corner of his eyes, frown only deepening. "What do you mean?"

"I found evidence that Shiro—"

Keith finally pulled from Allura's grip with a harsh laugh. "If it was the Lions speaking to you, forgive me for doubting it."

"Pardon?" Allura leant into Keith's line of sight, brow creased. "What does that mean?"

Keith bit his tongue. "Nothing." He muttered after a moment, turning his face away.

Allura didn't need to know about Keith's failing connection with his Lion. It had only gotten worse after their encounter on the planet they were now orbiting.

Eventually she would figure it out.

Keith grimaced. "So what is this... evidence?" He asked flatly.

"Lance—"

"Lance isn't here," Keith snapped, slamming a fist into the wall next to him. "Shiro is gone, and you're avoiding the facts because of Lance? We don't even know if he's alive! We don't know, and Shiro's gone, and you're happy about something which just makes me feel worse!" He breathed in sharply through his nose, blinking back tears.

He just couldn't stop crying, could he?

"My brother is gone. Possibly dead." He had finally said the word, the sound of it ringing out like the crash of a gong. Avoiding it had left him with a sliver of hope, but he had to stop and be realistic. "And you're just acting like we can move on from that. You're acting like Lance can solve all our problems, but in case you didn't realise, Allura - he's missing too! We don't know if Lance is alive at this point, or if the Blue Lion hasn't been destroyed, because you don't have a connection to it either, and- and-"

"Keith." Allura said gently, voice cutting through Keith's building panic. He took a shuddering breath, burying his head in his knees again.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, and Allura's hand found his shoulder again.

"I understand why you're struggling with all of this," Allura said, thumb rubbing in slow circles. "But you have not let me speak. I have every right to believe that Lance and Shiro are safe - and together."

Keith didn't react, aside from a stiffening of his shoulders.

"I know you don't believe me, and I fully understand why," Allura continued after a pause where Keith didn't say anything. "But if you hear me out, it makes perfect sense."

Keith made a small noise for her to continue.

"So," she started, drawing her hand back and smoothing down her skirts. "This is only me theorising, before you say anything. But this all starts with the Witch Haggar. You know that she corrupted the wormhole, and it dropped us all out at different places."

Keith nodded against his legs.

"Well, something... odd... happened to Coran and I whilst the Castle was stuck in the wormhole stream. I never spoke about it before because it didn't affect us - that is, until now."

She cleared her throat, sounding a little embarrassed. "We were stuck in some form of time loop. I was, for the most part, unaffected, but Coran..." she cleared her throat again. "Regardless, we managed to escape the loop somehow, and exited the wormhole the exact instant we entered it - on the other side of the galaxy."

"How'd'you know it was the same time?" Keith muttered.

"The Castle picked up signals from the Galra Flagship," Allura said, like it was obvious. "So we were transported through time, though only a small amount. But that doesn't mean he others weren't displaced further. I do recall Pidge saying she had only just been shot out of the wormhole when she found Hunk, but he had already been there for nearly two quintants."

"And you think this has something to do with the Blue Lion's lost connection? Or Shiro not being with Black, his- his blood staining the ground?"

Allura sighed. "It may sound strange, but yes. A large enough time displacement could interfere with my connection to the Lions - though we have no way to know if that is true, because this is unlike anything we've had to deal with before."

Keith shifted a little. His hand ached from when he had hit the wall, and he was sure it would bruise. But that was the least of his concerns. "So what does that mean?"

"I checked Black for any more information, hoping perhaps it would reveal another piece of the puzzle, and I came across the data logs. The Black Lion had apparently only been seperate from the Castle for too short a time to be accurate. I double checked for errors, but no - time displacement was the only explanation. Which means that the reason I had struggled to find Black earlier was because Black was simply not there."

"And you think that's what's happened with Blue?"

"Almost certain." Allura said, determination clear in her tone. "But that's not why I think Shiro and Lance are together, because that's an even more obvious solution."

She drew back, placing something on the ground next to Keith. He didn't make any move to look, and Allura sighed, getting to her feet. "Well, I suppose I should talk this over with Pidge and Hunk." She said, and turned to head down the short way to the Bridge. She paused however, a falter in her steps. "And Keith?"

He didn't look up.

"Don't blame yourself."

And with that, she was gone, the door sliding shut behind her, leaving Keith alone in the hallway.

It took him several minutes to even out his breathing, forcing down the guilt and fear, and even longer to bring himself to lift his head. Allura had sounded too lighthearted for it all, with the news and theories she had thrown at him. Keith was still stuck in limbo, mind replaying her words over him finding Black empty, it's pilot gone. Shiro has left nothing behind but blood and dread in the air, but Allura made it sound quite to opposite.

His heart said one thing, his mind another. Keith felt sick again, stomach twisting sharply.

Time displacement. How long had Black been sitting there? Hours? Weeks? The longer Keith thought about it, the more he felt nauseous.

He hauled himself to his feet, leaning back against the cool metal of the wall. His foot knocked against something.

Allura had placed something by his feet, he recalled through he fog setting on his mind. Probably food.

He glanced down, only to freeze, staring.

Because his eyes must have been playing tricks on him.

Lion slippers.

But they weren't red. They weren't Keith's, nor were they Hunk's, or even Pidge's.

They weren't even Black.

They were blue.

Keith knew that Lance kept his jacket and slippers in Blue, simply in case he couldn't get to the Castle. (In hindsight, Keith realised that he was probably the smartest of them all for that, because not even Pidge kept some of her tech in her Lion.)

So for Lance to be missing, but his slippers to be here without him, Keith's mind was reeling.

Shiro and Lance are together. Obvious solution.

Lance had left his Blue Lion slippers in Black as a sign that he was safe, and that Shiro was safe too.

For some reason, Keith found himself crying again, although it wasn't because of anger or sorrow this time.

Relief.

"You idiot," Keith muttered, wiping at his eyes with the cuff of his jacket. "Why didn't you just leave a message?"

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