Dark Poem 2 : Pondering

TickTock ; ClockClock

TitTock ; ClockClock

Tick - Tock -Tick

When the World is Sleeping
I'm awake.
Awake with my Demons
Feeding on me.

Each Demon a Different One :
Feeds at my Esteem
At my Confidence
At Me.

I can no longer keep my
Tears in ,
They want to Flow and
Create a Sea of their own.

A Million Thoughts rush by
Making me Claustrophobic.
They Fade me with their Smokes
I can no longer see.

My World goes Black
My Soul Mourns for Happiness.
All I think is :
Maybe Another Day
One Good Day.

What is Happiness like?
They ask.
I don't know , I retort.

It's long since I experienced any.
I guess they're like Flowers
I say : Pretty but Short-lived.
They Nod
And Disappear
And I'm again left alone with
My Demons.

Each Demon creates a New Root
Each - A Mile along with
Black Shadow and Claws.

They use their Claws
To Pain me
To Burn me.

To Burn me
Until I Wet the Sheets of my Bed
With the Sea of My Windows.

I continue to Weep
Time ticks by
Each Tear feels like An Ironed
Thorn.

My Eyes are Roses
And My Thorns are my
Tears.

Each Thorn Stings.
Each Thorn reminds me
Of my Mistakes
Of my Regrets
Of my Past
Of my Pain.

I can't let go
The Roots are too
Embedded in Deep
To let go.

Each day passing
I feel like a Disgrace
Each day the Poison
Gets Stronger , the Thorns
Break and I Weep
Get consumed by Void
And Float.

What if it's True?
What if I'm the Root to
Everyone's Problems?
I have started to -

I want to end -
But I can't.

There's a Purpose
I have Shed Seas
Thorns
Roses
They have Stung.
One day they'll bloom happily
And I'll be Afar
In the White Blue Smeared
Strokes of Sky
Floating in Ocean of Euphoria.

One day Euphoria and
Melancholy will make Peace
And
Leave for their Ways.
Melancholy will disappear
In Thin Flames of Vermilion Fire
And Happiness will bloom like
Cherry blossoms.

-Ridhima Joshi