I ran away. I couldn't face Theo without telling him the real reason why his father was dead. I was a coward and knew he deserved to hear the message but my feet picked up the moment Death left with Theo's father.

As soon as I got home, my feet instinctively made their way towards the small backyard. It all happened so fast. My knees hit the ground before I could process what I was doing, but it wasn't new. My trembling hands started digging a hole, my fingers sunk deep into the dry and brittle dirt as I created a plot.

Call it a habit or routine but this is what I always did when someone died. I couldn't let the deaths consume my mind, I had to do something and digging holes in my small yard was what kept me alive. I was surrounded by dozens of holes, I would plant flowers seeds into these plots except nothing ever bloomed.

My thoughts were scattered, they kept going back to last words from Theo's father to seeing him walking alongside with Death. I felt as if my ears and eyes were playing tricks on me but I heard and saw Theo's father. How was it possible?

Other thoughts began to invade, you killed him. Dig faster, Nora before the guilt consumes or maybe you should let it swallow after all it is your fault he is dead. My hands moved faster as the dirt embedded itself into my fingernails, my bones were aching from exhaustion but it didn't matter because those thoughts continued to speak endlessly until the hole became massive.

Ashes and smoke filled the air, chills ran down my arms. I didn't have to turn around to know who it was, I knew it was him and he had a lot of nerve showing up in front of me again. I fulfilled my punishment, I saw it and heard it. I was done with him.

Choosing to ignore the deadly God's being I moved my hands and carried on scooping dirt out.

He noticed my intention as the air began to fill with tension. I remember the last words I told him in the hospital and I don't regret saying them. 

His body moved away from the shadows as the moonlight illuminated against him from his visible Adam's apple, his sharp clenched jaw, his hollow cheeks, but his eyes were still dark. The moon couldn't bring any light to them.

My hair cascaded down to my side but through the small gaps, I peeked through and saw him. Death stood closer to me, his body loomed over me like a cloud that you couldn't tell whether it was a rainy one but it was, it just waits for the right time to pour down on you when you think your life couldn't get any worse.

Death's voice cut through the silence, "I know you hate me right now but at least you can live your life in silence. As you always wanted."

My hands froze from digging, a burning sensation spread through my body like a wildfire. He said it so casually as if he had given me choices and I made the choice.

I clutched the dirt as it crumbled between my fingers, I squeezed my eyes shut trying to ignore him but the fire he created inside of me was burning and it wanted to burn him. Hurt him.

My face turned to face him completely, once again I found myself looking to empty black eyes trying to find something but there was nothing. I felt hopeless just by looking at them, I don't even know what I was looking for.

"The silence I wanted is to not know when someone was going to die and to not watch them die again. This isn't silence...Theo's father, his death will haunt me forever, and the only noise I will hear from now on is Theo's cries." I argued.

I didn't get what I wanted because even if I had silence inside my head, the countless predictions I have heard and seen... will always be remembered. I remember every death, every person, every name.

Death responded, "I hate to repeat myself raven, but you left me with no choice."

The fire erupted.

A bitter laugh escaped from my lips, "I left you with no choice?" I repeated his words, "You didn't give me a choice! You forced me to watch someone die! I hate to repeat myself but you are a monster."

His gaze hardened as his nostrils flared, I made the God angry again and I don't care what he threatens this time. He can kill me if wants to.

Death lowered himself to my level but still managed to look down on me.

"That's the second time you have called me a monster. I don't think you properly know what that means-" He drew his body closer, "Would you like me to show you the monster you desperately seek?"

He wanted me to be afraid, to quiver in fear, and though I knew he wasn't bluffing about showing his true self I couldn't let him win again.

I swallowed down the fear and pushed out the fire.

"It wouldn't be any different from the face I am seeing right now," I assured him.

Death pressed his lips together as he nodded his head, my eyes glanced down to his lips seeing how much effort he was putting into stopping his mouth from twitching. He found this amusing, how pathetic.

"But aren't we the same? You also wear the face of a monster. Beautiful, alluring, and dangerous creatures that we are, my little raven." He asserted.

I hissed, "We are not the same. You didn't show any remorse or guilt as you took Theo's father and you are still not showing it even right now. You are a monster, you don't feel anything."

That stopped his mouth from twitching and his eyes glanced over to the hole next to me, "I always wonder why you did this, after every death you encounter. Are you digging graves for them?" He said coldly.

Without a second thought, my hand slapped Death across the face leaving his head turned away from me. His cheek glistened with redness and dirt-smeared, my chest rose up and down heavily trying to control my anger and fear for what I had just done.

The air suddenly became colder as I let out unsteady breaths into the air forming small clouds.

My hand drops to my side, feeling the dirt beneath my palm and I clutch it again. Death's jaw clenched sharply and I was still close to him.

I hated the silence at this moment.

I pushed the words out, "Don't." I gripped the dirt until my nails were sinking into my palm, "Do not mock me when you don't know anything. You may be the God of Death but you know nothing about losing someone." I gritted out.

His face slowly turned to me, my heart raced pounded against my chest as if it could burst at any moment.

"Leave. I never want to see you again." I said breathlessly.

Quickly, Death's body towered over mine as his breath fanned over my face and fear instantly shot through my body. My body almost hit the ground before Death placed his hand on my back, a shiver was sent down my spine.

His lips brushed my ear, "You make it so tempting to kill you, raven. I will leave but remember we will meet again one day." He whispered.

Death pulled my body up as his vicious eyes never left me, he rose to his feet while I stayed down with my knees sunken into the dirt. He wiped the dirt from his cheek and began to walk away.

I felt my heart slowly easing as he began to walk but he stopped his tracks and looked back at me.

"Take care, raven. I hope you resist the urge to be the hero from now on." With that, he turned his back around as darkness engulfed him leaving nothing but the empty shadows.

I grasped the pile of dirt and threw it towards where Death once stood, pieces of dirt flew everywhere. It was pitiful. Here I was sitting on the ground surrounded by plots that didn't grow anything, maybe they were graves.

Once again, my body fell into exhaustion and it was excruciating. Everything hurts. My hands, my bones, my head, and my heart. Everything is coming back and it is worse.

There is a reason why you shouldn't make a deal with the devil because the price you have to pay is far greater than anything you could imagine.

*****

After finishing taking a shower, I walked towards the kitchen grabbing a glass cup to drink some water, when I noticed there is a book on the counter. I placed the glass cup down and walked over to pick up the book, I didn't leave any books out. Most of them were inside my room.

My eyes met the title and my heart dropped, I can't feel it pounding. It was gone for a brief moment, with shaky hands I picked up the heavy book. It was real. My fingers feel the edges of corners and their crisp pages as they dance their way towards the title tracing over each letter.

The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane.

My heart came back up. I can see my mother's bright green eyes, I can feel her brushing my hair, and I can- I can hear her softly telling me the story about a china rabbit learning to love. I bring the book towards my chest and hug it as if it's her.

I don't think about whether Death left here on purpose because at this moment right now, I feel my mom. I remember and feel her for the first time since she died. I rush towards my bed and I begin to read the story, the tears drop to the pages leaving prints and I finish the book that night.

I sleep with the book.

I read the book every night and I go to sleep with it every night.