C H A P T E R   F O U R 

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"What team is your dad going for?" Jake asks a few hours later over FaceTime.

"Um, I don't know, Jake," I truthfully reply, shrugging my shoulders. "Why?"

"Because I need to know which team to tell him I'm rooting for," he explains.

"But you don't have to root for the same team my dad is rooting for," I giggle.

"I do," Jake argues. "The last time I met a girl's dad, the Cowboys and the Bears were playing and I told him that I was going for the Cowboys and he just kicked me out of his house."

"That's pretty dramatic," I laugh, grabbing my computer and going to Google to find out who's playing today. Once the schedule comes up and I see that it's the Panthers vs. the Broncos, I sigh. The only team I know my dad likes for sure is Browns. "We've never been to Carolina," I tell Jake then. "And it says that that's where the Panthers are from, but we have been to Denver, so that's probably who he's rooting for."

"Really?" Jake asks, looking at me with an annoyed look on his face. "That's what you're basing it on?"

"Well, I don't know what team he likes," I defend, putting my hands up in surrender. "It doesn't matter."

"Okay, but if your dad kicks me out, I'm going to take my anger out on you."

"Take a Xanax before you come over," I suggest. "It'll help you calm down."

"Very funny," Jake sarcastically replies then. "I'm leaving now, so I'll see you in a little while," he adds.

"Don't forget that Xanax," I remind him before saying bye to him, hanging up, and rolling over in my bed.

Richard and Stephanie are still here, somewhere downstairs, and because I didn't want to have to deal with any questions about my failed relationship with their son, I've been hiding out in my room since I got back. I don't think Carter's here and with any luck, he'll decide not to show up, in which case I won't complain.

It seems that isn't the case though, because a few minutes later, my mom calls me downstairs, saying that Carter's here and that I need to talk with him so that he doesn't get lonely. As if he's a four-year-old child. So I go to the front door and I pull it open and there he is. I avoid looking him in the eye and instead of greeting him, I just beckon for him to come in the house and when he does, I close the door and walk away.

But I don't get very far before my mom comes into the living room and tells us both to come to the table. So we do. It's only 4 o'clock, but I guess it's already time for dinner. Again, not complaining though, because the quicker we eat, the quicker Mr. and Mrs. Matthews and their offspring can get out of my house.

I try to sit down as far from Carter as possible, but it doesn't really work that well. The table is set for seven, which already makes the plate placement awkward. This is exactly why it should have just been the three of us, me, mom, and dad, just like always. So my dad sits at the head of the table and my mom sits directly across from him at the opposite end. Then on one side there's Stephanie and right across from her is Richard. And beside Richard there's me and across from me there's Carter. So that's unfortunate. But again, I'm sure my mother wanted it to happen that way. I don't know why she's so set on Carter and I being together.

My parents and Carter's parents spend the first few minutes talking and Carter and I just sit there in silence. I can feel him looking across the table at me, but I keep my eyes trained on my phone rather than on him.

"Savannah," my dad says. "Your mom says you've invited a friend over?"

"Yeah, he's on his way now," I confirm, not looking up from my phone.

"He?" He echoes, as if the thought of me having a male friend is insane.

"Yes, that's a thing now, platonic friendships between members of the opposite sex," I say matter-of-factly.

"Well, tell me, what's his name, this friend of yours?" My dad asks me then, suddenly all interested in him.

"His name's Jake," I say.

"His name is just Jake?"

"Yep, just Jake," I nod, not wanting to tell him his last name, because I know if I do, he'll know that he's on the school's football team. And if he knows he's on the school's football team, he'll bring up their...not-so-great season and that's the last thing I want him to do, especially when Jake gets here. That'd be terrible.

"And he's your boyfriend?"

"I'm going to the bathroom," Carter announces all of a sudden, standing and walking away from the table.

"Did I say something?" My dad asks us, looking from me to my mom to Stephanie to Richard back to me.

And before anyone can say anything, the doorbell rings.

"That's Jake, I'll get it," I say, jumping up from the table, happy to be able to get a few minutes of freedom.

I practically run out of the kitchen, a feat I'm pretty proud of, considering the fact that I'm wearing heels, into the living room, and out of the front door. And there Jake is, leaning against the doorpost, on his phone.

"Let's go," I urge, grabbing his arm and pulling him away from the door.

"I thought you said the dinner was happening at your house?" Jake asks.

"It is, but it's so awkward in there and I really don't want to go back in there, so let's just go somewhere."

"Somewhere like where?" Jake wonders. "It's Thanksgiving Day, you know, most places are closed now."

"Of course!" I exclaim. "That's literally just my luck."

"Now you're the one who needs a Xanax," Jake states.

"This is no time for jokes, Jake," I sigh.

"I'm sure you're just being dramatic."

"I'm really not, though," I assure him, shaking my head.

"You probably are," he insists. "What could be so bad?"

"Did I forget to tell you that my ex-boyfriend and his parents are going to be joining us for Thanksgiving?"

"Yeah, Savannah, you failed to mention that little anecdote," Jake tells me, letting out an exasperated sigh.

"Oh," I nervously laugh. "Well...surprise!"

"You sure are a handful, you know that, don't you?"

"Well, it's a good thing you've got two hands, huh?"

"Savannah, the food is getting cold," my mom says as the front door swings. "Oh, hello, you must be Jake."

"We missed it," I sigh, nudging Jake in the shoulder. "We had a chance to run and we lost it just that fast."

Jake laughs at that and my mom just rolls her eyes, obviously unamused. I wasn't even trying to be funny.

"Yes ma'am, I'm Jake," Jake tells her and I'm almost shocked by the fact that he knows the word 'ma'am.'

"Well, Jake, it's nice to meet you," she says, but I can see the distaste on her face. "Come in, both of you."

I let Jake go in front of me, just so I can have an extra second to think about whether or not I can make the run from here to my car in these heels without my mom catching me. And for a split second, I think I can do it. But then I remember that my keys are in the house and my car is in the garage, so the chance of me making a speedy getaway are slim to none. And with that in mind, I decide to suck it up and go after Jake.

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"So you guys aren't dating?" Stephanie asks Jake about thirty minutes into the world's worst Thanksgiving.

"Yeah, no, we're not dating," Jake confirms, glancing across the table at me with a weird look on his face.

It's as if my mom was trying to make this night as awkward as possible because she decided to seat Jake right next to Carter. Why, I don't know. But what I do know is that they're both directly across from me and it's just not a good time. I've been staring down at my plate for the past half hour, but I can only do that for so long before I develop a crook. Then again, though, I think I would rather have a crook than look.

"So what are you doing?" She asks and I let out another sigh. Like I said, I love her, I do, but she's so nosy.

"Jake and I are friends, Mrs. Matthews," I answer for him, not wanting him to be put in an awkward place.

"Well why didn't you invite a friend over tonight too, Carter?" She asks her son then, glancing over at him.

"I didn't know we were inviting friends over," Carter explains. "I thought it'd just be the six of us," he says.

"Well, God knows how awkward that'd have been," I shoot back, since he's clearly trying to say something.

"Yeah, well, only because you seem to like to make everything awkward," Carter mutters under his breath.

"I make everything awkward?" I repeat, finally looking up and over at him. "That's rich coming from you."

"What does that mean?" He asks, putting down his fork and looking back over at me with a curious look.

"Dave," Richard says, calling my dad's name, trying to change the subject. "You think Denver's winning?"

"It means that you broke up with me for no good reason and then you gave me some washed up excuse and thought that would make it better," I snap. "Not only that, but then you came and ruined my Thanksgiving."

"Only if pigs are flying," Dad says to Richard, not giving Carter enough time to come up with a comeback.

"He's not even going for the Broncos?" Jake whisper-shouts across the table. "You said he liked Denver!"

"You're being a drama queen, as usual," Carter says.

"Well, this drama queen is leaving," I announce, putting my utensils down and standing up from the table. "Happy Thanksgiving, everybody," I mumble, walking away from the table, ignoring my mom calling me.

I remember, yet again, that my car is still in the garage and my keys are still upstairs. I really don't want to have to deal with all of that right now, so I just walk out of the front door, slamming it shut behind me and I take off walking down the sidewalk. I don't know where I'm going, but I know I can't be at my house. At least, now while everyone else is there. I just need to be alone for a little while so I can just breathe a little.

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"I can't believe you left me alone with all of them," Jake complains the following morning after I call him.

"I'm sorry," I apologize, feeling guilty. I guess it was bad of me to leave Jake with people he doesn't know.

"I had to text my mom and call her to yell at me just so I could escape," he informs me. "That wasn't fun."

"I told you if it got to be too bad, which it did pretty much right off the back, then you could just walk out."

"Yeah, but you had done that already, so I couldn't do it too or else it would have looked bad," Jake explains.

"Okay, well, for future reference, you're still allowed to walk out even if I've already walked out," I state.

"Good to know," he chuckles. "So where did you go?"

"Just this old park my mom used to take me to," I say.

"Of all the places in town, you decided to go to the park?" Jake asks.

"Well, this isn't Tuscaloosa," I remind him. "There's not much here."

"Yeah, I noticed that last night," he tells me. "I saw more gas stations than anything else, it was very weird."

"Yeah, it's a weird town," I agree. "But we can go back to just hanging out in Tuscaloosa if you want to."

"Doesn't matter to me," he replies. "As long as I still get to see you pretty regularly, doesn't matter where."

My phone makes the beeping noise then, the one that tells me that someone else is calling. So I pull my phone back from my face and when I see "Carter" flash across the screen, part of me wants to just reject the call. That's the bitter part of me. The mildly more sensible part of me, though, wants to answer the call.

So I go with my sensible side and tell Jake that I've got to go, but that I'll call him back in just a little while.

"Are you there?" Carter asks once I've answered, but not said anything.

"I'm here," I confirm, clearing my throat. "Hey, what's up?" I ask him.

So he tells me that he's here, as in, here at the park that I'm at. It's the same park that I ran off to last night after the dinner at my parents' house. At some point last night, I went back home, but earlier this morning, I decided I'd come back. Weird, I know, for a person my age to be at a park, but here I am. Here being a rotted stump by the stupid water fountain where the whole "Carter and Savannah: the couple" thing started.

And I look up and I see him a few feet away, walking towards me. So I hang up and I let out a small sigh and half of me wants to get up and run back to my car and leave, but I guess it's about time I stop running.

So I sit there and I stare at the ground, waiting for him to get to me. It's like he's walking extra-slow though, because it feels like it's taking years for him to get here. But finally, he does and when he does, he speaks.

"Well, I know you don't want to talk to me, but I just wanted to apologize for last night," he tells me then.

"Oh..." I say, not expecting that at all. "Well, that's okay, no need to apologize for anything that happened."

Since he's being all cordial and apologetic and stuff, I guess I can be too. The truth is, even if Carter and I never go down the dating road again, we're still always going to be friends. Maybe not best friends, but friends. He knows too much about me and I know too much about him for us to ever not be friends. So I decide right then and right there to just let it go. There's no need in still being bitter about anything that happened between us. We gave it a shot and it didn't work out and that's okay. Sometimes it goes like that.

"I felt bad," he explains, sitting beside me on another stump. "I don't actually think you're a drama queen."

"It's fine if you do," I say, fighting the instinct to scoot away. "My parents always call me a drama queen."

Carter laughs at that and from that point on, we just talk. Mostly he just apologizes a ton of times, not for just last night, but for what happened a few months ago. And after he starts apologizing, I start apologizing, mostly for last night. And I think that while we're talking, it starts to feel like the old Carter and Savannah. Not the old Carter and Savannah: boyfriend and girlfriend, though, just the old Carter and Savannah: best friends. And I realize that I like us as best friends way more than I do as boyfriend and girlfriend. Because even though he was a great boyfriend and even though I did fall pretty hard for him, we're better as friends.

So Carter and I talk for a while. He catches me up on what I've missed out in his life these past few months and I do the same, omitting a few things, mostly those having to do with Jake. And at the end of our conversation, I think we finally find a bit of closure, for which I'm grateful. Of course I've known for a few months that the thing with Carter was over, having closure is what's going to help the wound start to heal.

But at least we tried. We gave the dating thing a shot and it was great while it lasted, but that's the thing: it didn't last forever. Relationships hardly ever do. I don't know if Carter ever actually loved me in the same way that I loved him, but I'd like to think that he did. Or if he didn't, then I hope he did at least a little. But if the last few months have taught me anything at all, it's that sometimes love isn't enough and things aren't always going to go the way you want. And that kind of sucks, but maybe that's what makes life so fun and so exciting and so beautiful, not always knowing what's going to happen or where you're going to end up.