It's that old saying of, "Don't judge a man unless you've walked two moons in his mociciens." We all know that and there are plenty of books that teach us that lesson. A coming of age book, which might not be everyone's favorite - not exactly my cup of tea. All of us have judged someone because they look different, talk differently, aren't smart, don't live up to expectations, boring, lame, slow, dumb, etc. Each of us have judged but not everyone has spoken. Why do we judge people in the first place?

Is it just a part of growing up and learning? We judge someone and then learn we were wrong or right? Or is it something in our mind that just makes us feel like the world revolves around us and only us. Everyone else doesn't matter and the only thing that's important is you. Perhaps it's because we're jealous and want to push someone down to cope with that feeling. There's always the case where we believe judging people is the only way to live or survive. Regardless, can you understand and learn why you judge? There has to be more than one answer, obviously.

But when you do stop looking down on people and see their side and life, do you continue or hold a grudge against them or fall down the rabbit hole even more?

X X X

He thought he could see something in the far distance. Like there was something calling for him in the far distance, the voice unrecognizable yet comforting all the same. There was definitely something out there, something that wiggled and churned with each movement or flick of their tail. He thought he knew what exactly was happening, but like every other attempt and guess, he was wrong and was forced back in his own mind.

There had to be something going on that he couldn't see, but he could sense everything that happened. Every blow that scared a pelt, every yowl that rang out of a hoarse throat, every drop of blood that rained from the world, and every emotion that took over. He could sense it and feel it with his own paws, but he couldn't place a thought together what it was. The only thing he could remember was being surrounded by a warm pelt before harsh winds whipped him, freezing him to the very bone.

His entire pelt shivered for what felt like the longest time before everything went black, shards of glass ringing in his ears endlessly. When the sounds finally died, only then did the cold winds stop and he was warm again.

He was sure that there were things that brought him the warmth he remembered being surrounded by. Such as a when a silver pelt crossed his path, her tail waving in the air ever so slowly as she trailed after others, staying in the back of the group. Something about her voice when he heard her speak made his heart pound. He assumed if she stood in the back, she could watch everything and know what was going on while taking the lead meant not knowing what was behind. Anytime he felt her nearby, there would always be feelings of pride and love. If only he had a face to that cat.

Then there was a brighter sensation that vibrated and emitted warm and soft lights of the sun. When he felt her nearby, his paws twitched and yearned for some kind of adventure, as she called it. She marched forward with a dance in her paws, loud and proud even if she fell on her face. He liked having her around, but then for what felt like moons, he assumed her to be gone. Vanished into thin air, leaving no trace behind except painful thoughts and twists that resided in others, like the silver cat. Miraculously, he felt her presence return, but the thing that came forward wasn't the same. He missed the shouts and the awful headaches that would follow after each word that flew out of her mouth, but it desperately hurt that the cat that returned had little to no traces of that joyful youth she once had.

The last thing he could feel and touch was another pelt that was brown, his pelt standing out like a silhouette. Mixed feelings constantly fought for dominance, love punches hate, hate slaughters sorrow, sorrow flies over joy, joy stomps over fear, fear destroys hope, and hope triumphants over love. All of these fought for a crown in this tom, this tom that he felt a strong connection to. Always looking up at him when times got tough or when he got lonely, that was the feeling he always got when that tom entered the picture. There were others that looked up to him too, including the silver cat and the golden cat, when she did decide to look up.

For some reason, those cats were always on his mind. While there wasn't any kind of bond that held them, something about the three made his paws tingle and yearn to learn more about them. The brown and golden cat were different than the silver one, as there were feelings of pride when the silver one came closer; never did he recall feeling this way when the brown and golden one appeared. When they came, he could only sit back and watch as they took control, learning everything he could from those two in particular.

But the latest pain told him something different was going on. Something that threatened to tear this bond apart.

First, there were blows on the side that spun his head. Then, claws scored across his pelt like thorns. Blood trickled down his body, soaking his pelt in a deep red. His mouth twisted to form words but his ears were number as he felt his body getting weaker. Heart pounding, he held his breath, waiting for the disaster to end while the three shapes around him moved.

There it was.

The golden cat was on their side, blood pouring out like an endless river. The silver cat was nearby, stroking the pelt as if trying to clean the wounds and stop the bleeding. The brown cat stood there, frozen and silent. A dark cloud hung over them, casting away all joy and hope as the golden cat lay dying - if that was the correct word.

Then senses rushed forward, choking him. His ears went numb as his mouth shouted and hollered. Rage coursed through his system at nobody, screaming at nothing. The words went unheard and this time, a yowl split the sky overhead. He gasped and jerked his head upward to see vibrant colors bleed through the dark, white clouds sinking through like heavy rags. Cold winds whipped against his sides, sending him back to the last moment he could remember, huddled in a ball of his own freezing fur, body no longer emitting warmth.

When he blinked, he stood in front of three cats, two larger-looking she-cats and a tiny, hapless kit in the center. He watched them and to his horror, the kit in the middle shared his exact pelt. The two cats exchanged some words, the silver one turning around with an annoyed wave of her tail. The calico, the one left, hesitated, green eyes conflicted. She looked at the kit and then the silver she-cat, lips curling into a snarl. He felt his heart freeze, the tiny body of the kit going still. Then the calico cat gave up and marched toward the tiny cat and, to his surprise, dropped herself around the kit, shielding him from the wind.

"You didn't deserve this."

Her words echoed in his ears, giving him a sense of comfort before the world shifted under his paws. He held his breath and squeezed his eyes shut, waiting for the spinning to stop. Loud and angry shouts snapped him to his senses and now, instead of the calico she-cat surrounding a dead kit, there was the three cats he always sensed.

They looked different then what he imagined them to be. The brown tom was more broader in the shoulders and had faint, dark brown stripes across his pelt and face. The silver cat was half the tom's size, and her pelt matched the same color as the silver she-cat's pelt from before. All it took was a little glance to the left to see that same cat, much larger and skinnier than she was before. He looked back and forth at the golden one, something attempting to rise out and fly to the sky.

He stepped closer just as the brown tom placed a paw on the cat's side. Whatever was trying to escape fell back and hissed, wiggling like a snake. He tried to avoid that thing and watched as the silver cat let out a scream, burying her nose into the golden pelt. Then there was a hiss, and a gray tom barreled through, smashing into the larger silver cat. He sucked in his breath and lowered his ears when his eye caught sight of a familiar pelt.

Without thinking, he left the golden cat's side and rushed over to the calico, checking her wounds. There wasn't anything trying to leave her body, so he was thankful he didn't have to see a strange snake-thing escape. The other tom a few feet away from her, however, there was a black snake that slithered out and instead of rising to the sky, it sank to the ground, leaving no traces it was ever there in the first place. He jumped in front of the calico and looked into her green eyes, touching his nose to her forehead.

"You can't die. Not yet."

He looked over just to see the smaller silver cat throw herself into the fight, siding with the gray tom. She slipped under the attacks and rammed her head into her enemy's stomach, unbalancing her. The gray tom took to the sky and came crashing down, pinning the silver cat down. There was a yowl, and soon enough, the brown cat joined the fray, raking his claws down the silver cat's hind. The golden cat was left alone, the snake thing starting to escape.

He stepped over and examined the wispy object, curious to what it was. As he approached the glowing figure, he began to hear sounds cry out, voices all belonging to the she-cat that lay at his paws. There were joyful shouts and cries, angry snaps and comments, harsh words and tones directed at other cats, sorrowful moans that were shared with others, and monotonous orders all rang out like a symphony. He wasn't sure what to do with it as the object began to rise, slowly glittering and shifting into another cat.

Patches of golden fur sprang out, covering her as the wounds that once dressed her disappeared and were replaced with patches of bright stars. He shielded his eyes from the glow and stared at the body of the fallen cat. Then he turned back and saw another cat just like him standing their, eyes sealed shut with a layer of frost. He frowned and lifted a paw, surprised that he felt a solid surface for once. The cat shuddered and let out a long gasp, her breath floating into the air. He shook his head and removed his paw, waiting for her to open her eyes.

When she did, he locked eyes with a cat with the deepest green eyes he'd ever seen. It reminded him of the forest's blanket that sheltered all living creatures and plants, protecting the life from disastrous storms. Then there was a flash in her eyes and her jaw fell open, all her attention focused on him, ignoring the battle they stood at. Her jaws quivered, unable to form words or talk. He looked at her and then he stumbled backwards as painful memories swarmed in like flies.

Another silver she-cat surrounding four tiny bodies, all of them nursing against her stomach for the milk. The same cat watching with pride swarming through her eyes as all of them finally stood on shaking paws, staring at the ground as if it were lava. The joy that fired her body when they jumped and walked for the first time or when they crawled over just for her comfort and safety, happy memories crowded his brain and made his own heart yearn to go back to those days. Then a certain night when her blue eyes fluttered shut, tail wrapped around four kits as her chest rose softly, singing a lullaby to her sleeping kits.

At least, she thought there were four kits.

The headache died away and he was left standing there just as the brown tom jumped away from a swipe. He stared at the she-cat in front of him, words coming to mind. Then she crumpled to the ground, throwing her head on her starry paws while letting out chokes and sobs. For some reason, his body knew what to do. All he had to do was walk over and gently graze her shoulder with his tail. She looked up, tears pricking her eyes as she uttered a sentence, fighting her voice.

"You're here... I'm sorry..."

And he shook his head, extending a paw for her to take. "We don't belong in this world."

"I didn't... I didn't do anything to help... I-I I just wanted to keep them safe." The golden cat looked at the battle between the larger silver cat against two younger cats and the dark gray tom.

"That's true," he commented, "but that doesn't mean you can't stop protecting them."

"... Why did you stop caring for us?" she growled, flattening her ears. "We really needed a StarClan and all you guys did was sit back and relax. Tell me what made you guys leave us?"

"I don't know the answer myself," he answered, shaking his head sadly. "I only heard lines of learning how to stand. That's all I know."

"Learning to stand...?"

"Nevermind that," he butted in and stepped away, the battle starting to shift and turn into a black void. "We don't belong here; we have to move forward."

And then she jumped into him, embracing him with everything she had, wrapping her tail around his and placing her paws down to keep her balance. She broke out and cried, screamed until her throat became hoarse. For some reason, he felt his own eyes shake and tear up, his paws moving on his own to embrace the cat. Then they connected, holding each other while their cries were carried by the wind, sharing one moment they never had. He buried his nose in her pelt and she placed a paw protectively around his shoulders, keeping him close as if she'd lose him again.

"It's all my fault... Everything," she choked, squeezing him. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!"

Flames began to lick the two starry cats up but their flames neither harmed or burned them. It swirled around, creating a cage of fire that blocked their escape. They didn't bother breaking away, staying with one another as the bright flames flickered closer. He shut his eyes and breathed in the scent of cinder and snow, ash and snow mixing in her messy pelt. She chirped like a bird, holding back chokes as she cried like a little kit. The fire came closer and enveloped the two cats, silencing the world.

Very slowly, he leaned over and whispered, "It's all right."