The phone started ringing as she was working on the homework she had not done the night before. Absently looking down at it, she frowned when she saw Steve was calling. He had gone to the tower for the day, with the intent on catching up on his own paperwork, most of which had built up over the holidays, when he had been noticeably absent. He had voiced his surprise at how, even when the Avengers weren't active, paperwork seemed to pile up.

Answering it, she tucked it between her ear and shoulder, as she returned to trying to figure out the proper order of operations on the math problem. "Hey, Baby."

"Brooklyn, Bruce was hoping he would be able to come over today, after Juliana gets off school. He would really like to get the samples, if possible." Steve began, sighing. "I know I said I wouldn't push... but we really need to be realistic about this. We need to know what's going on in your body, and Juliana's. If only to make sure the files are correct. I promise, it won't be invasive."

She froze, staring at the number she was in the middle of writing out. "Steve... I just..." she took a deep breath, and tried again. "I'm concerned about the samples being available to everyone."
"It won't be. I promise. Bruce has set up a personal server, that is not connected to any of Stark's systems. It's not connected to the internet. It's password protected. It's not perfect, but its the best he can do, and Bruce is pretty damn smart." Steve assured. "He's going to do everything he can, to keep this as under wraps as possible."
Setting down the pencil, she took the phone in her hand, resting her forehead on her other hand, and her elbow on the table. "Steve, it's not just all that. Its... it's willing submitting myself to testing, again. I thought I had left all of that behind, back in April. This... I know why you and Banner need me to do this. But at the same time... can't I just be scared of it all?"

He soothed her, his voice calm. "I know. But that's one of the reasons Bruce wants to do it there. Because maybe by taking the action out of the lab, and into a safe space, you won't be as... anxious about it? I guess that's the word I want to use."

"That's a pretty good word to describe it." She sighed, rubbing her forehead. She realized this wasn't going away. They had broached the subject to her, back in November, and it had been over a month since then. Realistically, that was more time than she had ever been given, in her life, in regards to a choice. If she was ever offered one. And Steve was right. The fact that it was happening in her own home might be slightly more comforting than going to the Tower and being in the labs there. Or even in Dr. Gibson's office. Maybe it would make it easier. "Fine. Fine. Just... Fine."

He was silent, but she could hear his long drawn out breath. "I'm sorry."
"No." She snapped. "Don't. It is what it is. Now, if you don't mind, I need to finish my fucking math homework, so that MAYBE I can pass my fucking test to get my GED, and maybe somehow get a degree that will help me contribute to fucking society."
She hung up on him, setting the phone down with a little more force than was probably needed. Groaning, she rubbed her face roughly, before picking up the pencil again.

It was a few hours later when she heard the key in the door. Looking up from her language worksheet, having finished the math homework, she frowned at Steve as he came in. She realized how she must look. She hadn't really put much effort into her appearance. She was currently wearing a pair of boxers, with knee high socks, and a tank top under a sweater. She wasn't even wearing a bra. God knew even her hair was a mess. Between constantly tugging at it while doing her homework, and not combing it this morning, the ratty ponytail was half falling down. Steve had wanted to go as early as possible to the Tower, but he had still waited until he could take Juliana to school, simply because she had been eager to jump on her homework, before class the next day.

As it was, she wasn't sure she had eaten anything more substantial than the bowl of cereal while Steve and Juliana got ready to go. She had been drinking coffee and water all day, so focused on getting the homework correct, that tearing herself away for anything more seemed like too much of a distraction.

"Sorry." She began, sitting up straight in the chair. "I shouldn't have hung up on you, like that."

"Nah." He shook his head, coming into the apartment, Banner following. The doctor was laden down with bags in his hands and on his shoulders. Banner gave her one of the awkward smiles she had come to associate with the man, since he had first come into the apartment, on Thanksgiving.

Steve kicked off his shoes, lining them along the wall, setting down the leather case he carried his shield in, before taking off his heavy winter coat and putting it on the coat rack. "If I had thought about it, I would have given you a better heads up, then just that call."

Brooklyn sighed. "Nothing was going to make it easier, really. At this point, pushing is the only way I was ever going to allow it to happen. Let's get this done, so we can go get Jules, and then discuss dinner."

"I was just telling Bruce you make a really good chicken and dumplings." Steve offered, smiling, while he turned to help relieve the doctor of some of the bags. "If you want, I can run to the store with Jules, and get what we need."

Looking over at the clock above the stove, she sighed. "I think that would work. Let me see what we need."

"I can do that." Steve offered, going over to place Banner's bags on the coffee table in the living room.

Banner followed, before rubbing his hands, looking at Brooklyn. "I really am sorry, but at this point, the only way we are going... well, we need to confirm the findings in some of the files, and try to clear up what they weren't really saying. And since the other... well, your siblings..."
"Since everyone but Juliana and I are dead, we are the only two who can help. Until you can get it from my father." Brooklyn concluded, letting her mouth twist. "Yeah, I can see how that would be an issue."

The doctor nodded, still apologetically. "I really appreciate this. I know this can't be easy."
"It's not." She sighed, looking down at her language worksheet. "But I guess, it can't be helped."

They lapsed into silence, while watching as Steve puttered around the kitchen, checking the things needed for the meal, while writing on the notepad kept for that reason.

"Steve said you were studying for your GED." Banner began coming over to the table slowly. "Then you planned on starting college in the spring."

"That's the plan." Brooklyn sighed. "The math gets me, sometimes. And that one," She jerked her head towards the kitchen and Steve, "Is of no help."

Banner pulled out the seat across from her, sitting down. "I am pretty good at it. If you ever need someone to help you figure out how to do it. You can always feel free to give me a call."

She paused, before going back to her work. "I'll keep that in mind. I was a bit stuck earlier, but I think I got it. But, thank you for the offer."

Nodding, Banner watched her, before pushing his glasses up his nose. "I hear you are going to be at the Gala next week."

"I'm going with my employer. His wife will be recovering from surgery, and he needs a female escort." Brooklyn set down her pencil, giving the doctor a small smile. "They've done so much for me, since I came to New York, that I told them I would take her place."

"That was nice of you. I can't imagine that was an easy choice for you." Banner smiled. "I don't think I'll be spending a lot of time there, that night."

She looked at him quizzically. "Not a fan of parties?"

"Not a fan of crowds." he corrected. "The stress can be... bad."
Brooklyn blinked, as realization set in. "Oh. Yeah. I can see how that would be. Not exactly a great time to go full green, huh? How does that work, anyway? Steve hasn't been exactly clear on it."

"Well, when my anger gets to certain level, or even my stress, I have a chemical reaction, and I basically...transform. And the other guy takes over." Banner awkwardly explained.

"Kinda like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde." Brooklyn surmised. "Only difference is Mr. Hyde just killed people. And was more charming."

Laughing, Banner nodded. "Yeah. It wasn't exactly the result I was looking for, with the experiment."

"No, I can't imagine it was." Brooklyn shook her head. "But you understand my concerns. I know I went over them at Thanksgiving, but I feel they bare repeating. For decades, since the success with Steve, and even since the first fall of HYDRA, people have been trying to recreate the formula. If, at all possible, it would be easier with my DNA, you have to understand why I am so... hesitant, in allowing my blood to be exposed to a laboratory setting. That formula has caused my family nothing but pain and torture all our lives. It's the reason why my siblings were so disposable. And that was just... breeding it. There ended up being only about a fifty fifty chance that it would be passed on, anyway. My father's genes didn't exactly take over, every time."

"But yours will." Banner blinked. "It's one of the things that was very clear in the files. Your genes will always be dominant. Which is one of the things I don't understand. Do you mind if I be completely honest?"

"I would prefer if you were." Brooklyn frowned.

"In the files, they made it very clear, that through their testing, the scientists at HYDRA discovered that your genes will always be dominant. So I don't understand why they continued to use your father's... efforts, to rely on recreating their possible super soldiers. They had you."

"Nine months." Brooklyn blinked. "I would have had to be out of commission for nine months. With the exception of a few times, I was rarely out of cryo that long. They would have had to be committing to keeping me out and awake, that long. As well as more than likely not being able to transport me all over the world, like they did."

Steve came over, having had been listening, the sneaky little shit. Kissing the side of her head, he told them. "I'm going to run to get Juliana. We'll go to the store afterwards. Then come straight home. Play nice with Bruce."

"I'll try." She shook her head.

Giving her one of his looks that told her he wasn't amused, he sighed. "I won't be long."

She watched as he put his shoes back on, then his coat, before he walked out the door, locking it behind him. Turning her attention back to Banner, she frowned. "Returning to what I was saying, there was also always a concern that they wouldn't find an appropriate male counterpart, if you will, that they felt was fitting to be my mate. There was a lot of concern about inferiority entering the bloodline. They had seen it with some of my siblings. There was a break down, in their genetics. It didn't' always breed true, the formula. And the fault had to have been with the mother, since there was no trace of it in my father."

She had decided to leave out the information that if they had decided to have her carry a child, it would have also interfered with their use of her father as a weapon. At certain times, the other handlers had not been fully briefed on how to either control or deal with her father. That was when her efforts were the most needed. And if she had been heavily pregnant at the time, the shock to seeing her in that condition might have proven too much for Solider, which might have caused him to act out in a negative manner. Especially after having just woken him up, when he was at his most disoriented.

Continuing their bloodline had been a key interest of HYDRA's, yes. But utilizing the Winter Soldier had been paramount. Especially under the last regime. She wasn't sure that there had been half as much activity before Pierce.

She caught the surprised look that Banner was giving her, and chuckled. "They liked to talk around us, as if we couldn't hear. We learned, very early, to not respond. Zola was the only one who really talked to me, about what was going on. But that's only because he considered me a pet. A very highly prized one, but a pet, none the less. He liked to tell me all that I would one day accomplish, as HYDRA's Queen. About the world I would one day oversee. HYDRA's pipe dream. Those were the fairy tails I grew up with. That and the stories about Steve my father would tell me."

"Yeah I have to say... considering how you were raised... you really seem to have adjusted well." Banner said, almost as awkwardly as possible. "I would have expected more... world domination."
"It comes and goes. Steve says it's a work in progress." She leaned back in her chair, bringing a leg up, and wrapping her arms around it. "Sometimes it feels like the dark is too close to the surface. Those are bad days."

He nodded, grimacing. "I know how you feel. There are days when it feels like... the other guy is too close to the surface. Those are the days I dread."

Brooklyn felt for him. At least with her issues, she felt like she had some control. But she had seen what it was like, living with two personalities in your head. Her father had been like that, for what seemed like her whole life. "I know how that can be. I have a question. One I'm hoping, as a doctor, you might be able to answer."

"Go ahead." Banner smiled encouragingly.

"What does love feel like? Like for normal people?" She held her leg a little tighter.

"Love?" He blinked. "Can you give me an example?"

She pursed her lips. "Do I have doctor patient privilege?"

Banner looked at her for a moment. "I think that works. Even though I'm not really that type of doctor."

Brooklyn kept her lips pursed, thinking it over. There was a fair chance Banner would not keep her confidence, but given that he was a doctor, he might consider it his privilege to hold her secret, at least until she was ready to share it, herself. "There are time, when it feels like my chest is going to burst open, with how big the feeling is, inside me. Like, it's pressing everything else down or aside. It's almost like, if I don't let it out, it's going to crack out of my chest. It's uncomfortable, sometimes. And I don't know how to make it stop. So I was wondering, if that was really love. Because love isn't described like that, in the books. Or in the movies."

"You feel this way... towards...Steve?" He lowered his head, looking at her over his glasses.

"It's bigger, during and after sex. Sometimes when he's being... just so... God, when he's being so goddamned perfect... Or he's just looking a me with that little smile of his, like I'm the most amazing thing he's ever seen." She let her eyes loose focus, thinking about it. "Sometimes, I'll look up, and he'll be playing with Juliana... and I just... I feel like it's going to rip out of me. And I can't even think about how I would have to try to live through it, if something happened to him. Then, when I have a chance to think about it, I think... that cant be normal. That can't be healthy. There is no way that level of feeling is sustainable."

"Has he... does he feel the same way?" Bruce started to look uncomfortable.

"No." She shook her head. "I don't know if I should even bother him with this... or just hope it goes away. Because maybe it's better if it did. It just feels like one of those things that is too big to be locked up and ignored. I'm worried I'll say or do something and it'll all come out."

"You think it's a bad thing, to tell him how you feel?" Banner looked more confused. "I would think that love would be a good thing."

"I don't know. I mean, I love my father. And he's always had the power to hurt me. I love Juliana, but she's a child, so she's virtually harmless. But loving Steve? That... that feels like it could be the end of me." She rested her chin on her knee. "You understand what I'm trying to say? Or am I messing it up?"

He shook his head, frowning. "No. I think I understand you. You are worried that being in love with Steve would be dangerous, because you could get hurt."

"Yes." She frowned, as well. "I think. Yeah, that's about right. He could have the power to hurt me, more than even my father did or could. I honestly think that Steve could kill me, and I would thank him for it. Because... if I do love him, I would want him to be the one. Because if he doesn't... than it wouldn't hurt him, beyond losing a playmate. If my father ended up being the one.... it would destroy him. And I know, I know... Steve goes on and on, about not wanting to be in a world where I don't exist. But he has before. He's been in love before. He's survived that. He would survive me, better than I would survive him."

"Let me see if I got this right. You think Steve, Captain America, Mr. 'how can we keep as many of the casualties down as possible', would be able to kill you, and just be able to walk away.... as if it doesn't matter to him? You think your death, won't matter to him?" Banner asked, shocked.

"Well, I mean, I know it would." Brooklyn sighed. "He's made that clear. But, at the same time... I think he would be able to get over it, eventually. He'd find someone who wasn't obsessed with owning him. Someone who would give him everything he wants. A family. A marriage. The future he wants. It's times like this... when I think about things like this... when I wish I was still on the suppressants."

Banner looked like she had smacked him. "Why would you...?"

"Because if this is what it feels like... to feel... to want... it's... it's almost too much, sometimes. Like... I keep thinking... this isn't love. It's obsession. That's what it has to be, right?" She blinked at him, hopeful. Maybe the doctor would be able to tell her she was right. It was just an obsession. She had lost so much, that finding something, someone that she wanted to make hers, meant that she was just confusing the two. He would be able to tell her, that she would be able to push the feeling aside, to lock it away, as long as she paid attention to it. Maybe even tell her it would go away, in time. Or at least fade.

"I don't know. I mean, love feels differently for different people. Maybe the fact that you've never, from what I understand, ever experienced a crush makes you a little bit more hit by it." Banner blushed. "Although, maybe you really should be talking this over with Steve. I mean, it kind of involves him."
"And if he says he doesn't? I don't want to ruin what we have, now, by coming off as some love sick school girl." Brooklyn shook her head, sighing. "Then, he might decide... well, I don't know if I can let him go, even if he decided I wasn't worth it, anymore."

They stared at each other, before Banner cleared his throat. "You really need to talk to Steve about this. I mean... he needs to be the one to hear it."

"I'm sorry." Brooklyn realized she was probably making the poor man uncomfortable. Not everyone was used to her way of just.. blurting things out. She wanted to talk to Wilson, but was concerned that whatever advice he gave her would be along the lines of, 'you can't own people, and if they want to go, you have to let them go'. Which was not what she really wanted to hear, in this moment. "I guess we should get the blood draw done, before Steve and Juliana get back."

Banner nodded slowly, before standing up. "Are you sure?"

"No use putting it off any longer." She sighed, letting go of her leg, and setting it down. "At the very least, if I freak out, then you know what you are looking at."

Looking at her with more than a little concern, he went over and picked up the bags, lugging them over. "Okay, so, I'm going to start with the simple check. Heart rate, blood pressure, lungs, temp, things like that. Then we will move on to the more invasive things. Okay?"

"Heart rate might be a little elevated." She warned, reaching for her sweater, pulling it over her head, laying it aside. Reaching down to tug the tank top over her stomach, she glanced at the doctor who was blushing, staring at her chest. Looking down, she sighed, tugging the top up to be a little more covering. "Sorry. I should have changed when I heard you were coming over, but I wanted to get my homework done."

"Ah... no, it's okay. I would rather you be comfortable, than... it's okay." He looked at his bags, as he started going through them, pulling out items. He set them down, on the table and she looked at them, as she began to bring her hand up to her jaw, popping her knuckles. Banner paused, looking at her, with eyebrows raised. "You do that often?"

She paused, before blinking. "Yeah. I guess. It's a habit that I've never been able to break myself of. Steve... he tries. He will take my hand, instead. But... yeah."

He continued to pull items out of the bag, a lot of which she was familiar with. A stethoscope, a pressure cuff... but there was a lot that she was not. She pushed the fear down, taking a deep breath. Just because she was unfamiliar with the objects she was seeing, did not mean that he was going to hurt her. Steve would never have allowed the man near her if he had thought for a moment that Banner would hurt her. He cared about her, that was for sure. And he was protective of her. So she was certain that whatever Banner was going to do, it would be alright. She just had to be strong.

Distract yourself, Brooklyn.

"I have to write a practice essay. To prove I understand how to do it. Three to four pages." She began to ramble as Banner continued to pull things out of his bags. "The prompt I was assigned was 'what was a significant moment in your life that you feel changed you'. A bunch of the other students were discussing it, during break. I overheard them, when I was on my way back from the campus coffee shop. They were all talking about things like the first time they got a car, or the birth of their baby. One even said that they were going to write about the first time she realized she liked women, instead of men. And I have been thinking, over and over, about what to write. Almost all of my moments are... horrible. And not something I think I should be putting down on paper for a stranger to read."

"That could be a bit difficult." Banner agreed, sitting back down and picking up a small white box with a hinge, as well as one of the fancy electronic pads he had pulled out. "Okay, I'm going to put this on your finger, and it's gonna give information on your oxygen and your heart rate. It'll be quick."

"Go ahead." She held out her hand, and Banner clipped the white box on to her middle finger. It beeped, and started to flash. "I was listening, when one of them said that they thought about writing about finding their mother dead of an overdose on the bathroom floor, but was scared to put their feelings down on paper. Another student suggested that if they did that, to take time and go to their happy place. I don't think I've heard that phrase before. Happy place." She took a deep breath. "So I looked it up. A happy place is where you go, either physically or mentally, to comfort yourself. I think that's an awesome concept. Don't you? That you can just... imagine yourself somewhere else, or doing something else, and it helps make you happy or calm."

"I think the trick with that, is having a safe place to go to, in the first place. Somewhere you don't feel threatened, or worried. It can be a memory or an imaginary place. People will spend their whole lives, looking for a place to feel safe. Some actually find it." Banner said, tapping at the pad in his hand. "Have you figured out your happy place?"

"I'm not sure." She admitted. "Have you?"

He paused, before looking at her, frowning over his glasses. "I like to think that Stark Tower is my happy place, right now. I'm safe there. And I help keep people safe, while I'm there."

"It's a heavy burden." She commiserated, giving him a half smile. "When I first came to New York, I wasn't sure I was ever going to be safe. I figured I would always be looking over my shoulder. It was months before I even really felt safe leaving the apartment. More before I started really exploring New York. If it wasn't within four blocks of this apartment, I didn't' want to deal with it. Work helped. Going to the Bronx on an almost daily basis really helped. I met new people, I saw new things. I learned that I could trust myself, around other people. I made friends."

"Friends are nice." Banner smiled wistfully. "Its kinda nice to meet new people, and just... be yourself, and not worry about what they think about you."

"Yes." She agreed, smiling. "That's exactly it. It was interesting, meeting people, and have them know nothing about me. I could be who I was telling them I was. The identity I had been given... that person didn't know anything about HYDRA or what it felt like to rip a man's heart out of his chest, feeling his blood under her fingers, and hear his last breaths. That person didn't know what the inside of her own skin looked like, or what the sound of her bones breaking was like. That person... she was new, but still had a past." She saw Banner flinch when she mentioned the blood and bones, but pushed on. "I've been trying to write, based on that person, but I can't do it. Because as much as I want to be that person, I'm not. I'm not the Queen anymore, but I'm not Brooklyn Bianchi. It's like... I don't know who I'm becoming, sometimes. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I don't know what to write."

"Maybe write about the first thing you saw, in New York, that wasn't in your neighborhood." Banner suggested, as his pad beeped, and he removed the white box off her finger. He set it aside and picked up the thermometer. "Open your mouth, please." She did, and he slipped the thermometer under her tongue. "Hold it there, until it beeps? I'll do a forehead scan as well, to compare. But for now, I would like an internal temperature. Maybe write about how it made you feel. The way you built yourself up, to leave the neighborhood. What you needed, that made you explore outside of it."

She frowned, holding the thermometer in her mouth, while she pondered that. She supposed it would work. It wasn't like she could really pull anything from her former life to write about. Almost everything she had experienced might raise an eyebrow or two, if she wrote about them. But there were new things that she had seen and done since coming to New York that might be tweaked a bit, to fit the parameters of the assignment. The thermometer beeped, and she pulled it out, holding it out to Banner. "I guess that might work."

"Do you have a happy place?" Bruce asked, taking the thermometer from her, eyebrows raised. "I mean, I know you just said... but you must have some place you feel safe."

"In bed, with Steve." She answered without thinking, then she blushed. That had been a little bit more information than she had been ready to give. But it was true. The safest place she felt, was when she was wrapped up in Steve's arms, under the covers, with the dark of the night surrounding them. It was when she could finally breathe, finally really feel like nothing was ever going to touch them. It was what she looked forward to, everyday, when she was feeling down. The fact that Steve would be there, with open arms to keep her warm and safe. "I feel safe there."

Banner nodded, picking up the pressure cuff, and the stethoscope. She offered her arm, without being prompted, watching as he wrapped it tightly around it before beginning to pump it up. "If we did this at the tower, it would be automatic. But... Yeah." He smiled at her apologetically. "Does he know that you feel safe there? Like that?"

"I've told him, I think. Or I've at least alluded to it." She frowned. She had told Steve that being in his arms made her feel safe, right? Or had she even failed to do that? Had she expressed to him, that being wrapped around him, with his arms holding her, made her feel as though the world outside couldn't touch her?

She watched as Banner pumped the cuff up until it was just this side of uncomfortable, before pressing the end of the stethoscope to the crook of her elbow, listening, before slowly releasing the air from the cuff. After deflating it, he unwrapped her arm setting the cuff aside, as he tapped at the pad.

"You are almost matching with Steve, in some aspects." He commented. "Granted, you also match your father, so there is that as well."
"That's to be assumed. Even though it was a different formula, they were similar. Or as similar as HYRDA was able to produce. And since I got mine through genetics, it would make sense that I match my donor." She shrugged, not surprised. "The fun stuff is what's inside."

He blinked at her. "Inside?"
"Yeah." She nodded. "I mean, I'm female. My father and Steve are males. So it would be safe to assume there would be some basic differences in our physiology. You know, because I have a vagina and uterus, and they have a penis and testicles."

"Oh." Banner looked at her, blankly, before taking a deep breath. "Yeah. That would make sense."

"I also have female hormones, and they have male ones. Or at least, I have more producing female hormones, while they have more male producing hormones. Basic biology. I picked that up from the scientists and doctors." She grinned. "I'm not always completely confused by what's going on around me. I had a lot of time to listen to people, while they were poking and prodding at me. For all that Steve sometimes forgets that I'm not so sheltered. Which, when you think about it, is kind of funny. It's like he's equating sexual innocence with actual innocence. And just because I didn't do it, doesn't mean I didn't know what it was. Men can be very disgusting, you know?"

"I've heard that." Banner blushed. "How can they be disgusting?"
"They like to talk, they like to try to touch. God knows, I've heard enough to know what goes through a man's mind, in my years. I guess that's why I'm sometimes surprised when Steve acts like he wants something he thinks he shouldn't." She cocked her head. "But from what I gather, that is typical. There is a puritanical attitude when it comes to sex, in this country at least, so people don't do or tell their partners what they want. I mean, he likes some things, and I don't mind doing them, because in the end, they feel reeeeeeally good."

She watched as Banner paused in his tapping at the pad in his hands, slowly looking up at her with wide eyes. Getting a distinct impression that the doctor was uncomfortable, she asked, "Am I oversharing?"
"A bit." Banner admitted, but shook his head. "But it's okay. People talk to doctors. Usually about things they don't talk to anyone else about. Even if I'm not usually that type of doctor, it's okay."

"I can change the subject?" She offered. "Wilson is usually the one who gets my weird rambles, besides Steve. But Wilson just lets me ramble. Usually because he says he gets a really good idea of what's going on in my brain when I do. Occasionally he'll direct it to somewhere else, if I'm getting a little too in-depth in a subject he doesn't want to hear about."

"Like your sex life with Steve." Banner nodded, reaching for the stethoscope, hooking it in his ears again. "I'm going to listen to your heart, then your lungs. Is this okay?"

"It's fine." she sat up straight, lowering her hands to her thighs. Concentrating on her breathing, she looked over his head as she felt the first press of cold metal. His fingers were oddly neutral in temperature. Neither hot nor cold. If she really thought about it, she would have called him room temperature. She wondered if the 'other guy', as he refereed to his alter ego, had a different temperature. Would he run hotter, or colder. Considering the fact that he apparently was able to go around into battle without a shirt, she would lean towards hotter. As Banner moved the metal end of the stethoscope around her chest, instructing her to take deep breaths, she wondered if it would be considered rude to ask him. It wasn't everyday you had the opportunity to have a private conversation with someone else who had a monster constantly clawing at your insides, trying to get out and take over.

He finished quickly, looping the stethoscope around his neck, before tapping away at the pad.

"Dr. Banner? May I ask an invasive question?" She waited until he looked at her, frowning, before continuing. "What's it like?"

He looked confused for a moment, before realization flashed across his face, followed by shame. "Oh."

"You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to." She wanted to reach out and place her hand on his, but resisted. She'd already been invasive enough, asking him about... well, his inner monster. "Like I said, it was an invasive question."

"No." He sighed, rubbing at his curly hair. "I'm being pretty invasive, right now with you, so I guess it's only fair. Its like... I reach a point, and I just... black out. I'll wake up, and I have a slight idea of what was going on, but I had no control over it. It's almost like I'm in the backseat of a car that's had it's breaks cut, but I'm buckled in so tightly I can't get over and pull the emergency brake. Like I'm just along for the ride. I mean, it's gotten better, when I'm out with the team, but the other guy still likes to cause a little more mayhem than I feel comfortable with." He reached for a tongue depressor and a small flashlight. "Open your mouth please?"

She did and he pressed the tongue depressor on the back of her tongue. She automatically dropped her jaw and let her tongue go limp, similar to when she was taking Steve into her throat. Relaxing the muscles, she caught the startled look on Banner's face, before he blinked and flashed the light down her throat and in her mouth.

He cleared his throat, pulling away with a small frown. "You don't have any tonsils."

"Nope. Or an appendix." She rolled her tongue in her mouth, getting away from the sterile feel of the depressor.

"But there's no scars." He frowned deeper. "I don't understand."

"My body didn't need them." Brooklyn shrugged. "Zola thought because I was born the 'superior human' that my body naturally developed to get rid of the things it didn't need. Tonsils collect things to prevent sickness. I can't get sick. And an appendix is a vestigial organ. It doesn't serve a purpose, other than to get sick and cause sickness. My body just... didn't make them. Oh, adenoids, too."

"You weren't kidding when you said the fun stuff was inside." He chuckled. "It's really amazing. Steve still has his."

"Yeah, but he was artificially created, to put it bluntly. I was born with all of it. Or rather, without it. I mean, it makes sense. If the formula was intended to create the better human, would it not make even more sense for the formula to continue that work, down the generations?" She leaned back in the chair, bringing her leg up to wrap an arm around it.

"That would match what some of your files were saying." He looked at her, as if debating something before sighing. "They theorized, based on the tests they had already done, that you would be certain to overtake whatever other DNA was introduced. That your children would have the formula embedded in their DNA like you did, from birth."

"I also got a top up, when I as was a child." She reminded. "From what I gather, they were concerned I was showing weaknesses that I should not have, if I had been born with it fully embedded. I barely remember it. Just a lot of pain, to be honest. But Zola confirmed it, when I was older. That they had to give me a series of injections, over a course of a few months, to make sure it had fully soaked in. Because they were worried, I know now, about how Grant didn't turn out. In fact, he rejected the formula completely."

"Grant being subject... two?" Banner asked, looking for confirmation. "The comparisons between you two were... well, as human test subjects go, they really got lucky. A pair of fraternal twins?"

She gave him a grim smile. "Yeah. Lucky them."

Banner must have realized how he sounded, because he flushed again, ashamed. "I'm sorry. It's just as a researcher..."

"it must be like the holy grail." she nodded. "And if we had been willing adults, I would agree with you. But we were, in fact, babies, when this all started for us. We had no say. And while Grant ended up.... well, becoming what they wanted him to be, I will always be proud if they always considered me a bit of a disappointment. Even if he didn't have the added enhancements I do."

"I don't know if they considered you a disappointment." Banner sat back, looking at her. "I think they considered you the success. Why else would they protect you the way they did? It couldn't have just been in case they needed you to continue to propagate the bloodline they had started. They still had your father. And several other successes, along the line."

She wanted to flinch at the mention of her dead siblings. "I'm sure the fact that I was also one of the few things that calmed my father down, when he was not being cooperative. The carrot at the end of the stick, if you will." She neglected to add that she was also the one that sometimes held the whip. "I had been trained early on how to soothe him out of a fit of distemper."

"Did that happen, often?" Banner reached over, sliding the items needed to draw blood closer. "Do you mind if we go right into the draw? I would prefer to get it over with quickly, I think."

She took a deep breath, letting it out before slowly nodding. "Better quicker, than to wait, right?"

"Yeah." Banner nodded as well, giving her an apologetic look. "If there was any other way..."

"But there isn't." Brooklyn turned her head, lowering her leg, sitting closer to the table. She laid one arm on the top of the table, relaxing as much as possible, while turning her head to look over at the clock on the stove. "Just get it done, Banner."

She felt him wrap the tourniquet around her arm, before taking a deep breath, and trying to disconnect from what was happening. "He often had moments when he was uncooperative. When I was younger, I didn't understand why. He had tried so hard, to shield me from what was going on outside of my own training. And I didn't have a whole lot to compare it to, you understand. Books were few and far between. I would get them as rewards, sometimes. But for the most part, books about the outside were limited. I wasn't exposed to popular culture, really, until my first mission. And even that was as limited as possible. After that, I would see things, outside the facilities, but radio, television, movies... not really part of my sphere of influence." She felt Banner's fingers probing her arm. "So, when I got older, and I realized that maybe we weren't the good guys, the way I had been raised to believe... it was a bit of a shock, really. And Papa just... he did try to protect me, from the worst of it. But there were some things that were out of his hands. Either he was away on a mission, or we were split up to make it more efficient... The worst times were when something would go wrong. Either the target had avoided us, or we had been detected. But I guess it would also happen when something he saw or heard triggered something that had been pushed down by our handlers." She ignored the cool sensation of the alcohol wipe. She vaguely heard Banner issue the warning about the needle going in, before the pressure and sting. "Then he would become very confused. And in his confusion he could be violent. Not to me. Never to me. Not really. I mean, he would forget his own strength. That was unavoidable. But if he struck out at our handlers, the things that they would do later would be so much worse. So I was trained to soothe him, to bring him around, so that they would be able to either put him to sleep, or wipe him again. That was when I hated myself, sometimes. Watching that. It happened in DC, after his first attempt to kill Steve. He was... blank. I had never seen him that blank. He wasn't responding to me, not really. I was there, I knew he heard me, I know he felt my hands, but he was either refusing or unable to respond."

She heard the clink as he placed the collection vials down on the table, but pushed past the knowledge of what was in them. That she was willingly submitting herself back to science. "I had never considered what would happen, if he had ever run into Steve again. To be fair to myself, I was still running under the impression that for the longest time, Steve was dead, the way the rest of the world believed. So it wasn't even on my radar of things to be concerned about. After they woke us up, a few months after New York, one of the handlers was nattering on about how wonderful it might be, to get a sample of Captain America, to compare to us. That was the first I had ever heard about him being alive. Then we went under for a few a while more. And then when we woke up... everything was SHEILD, HYDRA, Insight... and then we escaped. But my point was, I had never considered what Steve would do to my father. That he could break him like that. But I should have. That was one of the reasons why Zola and the others had me trained in how to handle my father, when he was like that. The emotional connection sometimes proved too much for the conditioning he was under."

She looked down at her arm, as she felt him removing the needle, pressing a cotton ball to the mark. She reached out, pressing the cotton ball down, for him, so he could handle the vials and draw. "Does any of that make sense?"

"Yeah." Banner looked at her sadly. "I'm sorry you had to do that, for him and for yourself. That you had all your free will taken away, like that."

"It was the only existence I had ever known." She smiled back at him. "in the end, we managed to escape. So, it all worked out. Somewhat. Was that the only sample you needed?"

"I would also like to get some skin scrapings and a hair sample?" Banner looked at her, as if having caught on to her. She didn't mind. She knew she was bouncing from topic to topic, if only as a distraction for herself.

"That's fine. It's not invasive." She watched as he began to put away the collection vials into one of the bag, being very careful with them, before he began to pull out new items. One looked like a petri dish, and a small stick that looked like a scalpel, but not as sharp. He brought it up to her shoulder, and looking at her, as if waiting for her to object, began to scrape gently along her skin, sliding the edge of the tool on the dish. He did this several times, before setting it aside, slipping a lid on the dish. Picking up a pair of tweezers and another dish, he reached for her head. When she didn't move, or flinch, he began pulling strands out of her head, putting them in the dish.

"That should be all I need." Banner sat back, beginning to pack everything up. "I just need to get the blood sample from your sister. Then you shouldn't have to worry about having to give me another one, ever again."

"We'll see." She snorted, as she pulled the cotton ball away from her arm. It hadn't mattered how long it had been there. Not really, she had held it as long as she had, simply to keep herself occupied. She stood up, stretching. Reaching for her sweater, she pulled it on, before jerking her head towards the hall. "I'm going to use the bathroom. Help yourself to anything in the kitchen. Steve and Jules should be home soon. I imagine he sped through the shopping. Probably wants to make sure I haven't ticked you off and caused you to break the windows or something."

Banner nodded, going back to his bag. "I'm good. I might want a glass of water, but I can wait for dinner."

"Okay." She walked around him, going down the hall to the bathroom, shutting it softly behind herself. Flipping on the light, she went over to the sink, turning on the water, before calmly reaching for the washing cloth on the rack. Folding it gently, she took a deep breath, letting it out on a shudder, before pressing the cloth to her mouth. She closed her eyes, and turned, sliding down the wall, letting it all out. Using the water and the cloth to muffle her sounds, she sobbed, pulling her knees up to her chest, the cold of the tile under her seeping into her shorts.

It had been a while since she had let it out like this. Steve somehow usually knew when she needed the release of emotions. Even if it was working them out through sex, or even a quick spanking, he had been quite effective in helping her get over the emotional blockage that usually only came out when she was sleeping. That was the one place where her emotions slipped her control. But now, after having just given samples that could possibly fall into the wrong hands, no matter how secure Steve and Banner thought they were, the enormity of what she had just done was overwhelming. It wasn't as bad as when she had first gone to Dr. Gibson, with the internal exam, but it was close. And unlike then, she didn't have Kitty holding her hand and helping her through it.

But she had powered through it, even if she had rambled the entire time. The knowledge that she was safe in her own home definitely helped. But it still was difficult. She had pushed down the fear and shame.

Taking a few deep calming breaths, she sniffed hard, clearing her nose, before using the damp washcloth to wipe her face. Clearing her throat, she stood up, before thrusting the washcloth under the running water. Soaking it in cold water, she looked at herself, ashamed of her red face and puffy eyes. Say what you wanted about her, she was not a pretty crier. Pressing the washcloth against her eyes, she willed the puffiness to go away. She needed to erase the evidence of her weakness. Everyone kept telling her how strong she was, but there were times when she felt like it was just lip service. Times like now, when the emotions and the weakness became too much.

It took several applications of the washcloth before the puffiness and redness went down enough where she felt it wasn't as noticeable as before. She took a quick minute to wash her hands, before taking down her hair and brushing it out, putting it up in a proper ponytail, before turning off the water. She dried her hands, before opening the door and leaving the bathroom.

Banner was still seated at the table, tapping at his tablet, giving her a quick look, before frowning and looking at her for a bit longer. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Banner." She assured, taking a slow breath. Coming down the hall, she went into the kitchen, and began pulling items out of the cupboards. Setting a large pot on the stove, she turned and pulled out the cutting boards, and two knives, setting them on the boards. One for vegetables, and one for meat. She pulled out the flour, the salt, and the baking powder. She set that down on the counter, before hunting down the mixing bowl. As soon as she found it, she put the items needed for the dumplings in it before pushing it towards the center of the counter. She went to the fridge, beginning to dig through it, looking to see if they had anything that would help her get a start on the soup. Beyond an onion, they didn't. She tried to figure out how long it had been since they had gone to the grocery store.

"I had a few questions, if you don't mind?" Banner asked, looking up from his pad, at her.

"Go ahead." She began tapping her nails on the counter, slightly irritated that she couldn't remember when she had last gone to the grocery store. Had Steve taken over the chore, completely? She knew she had gone to the bakery under the apartments yesterday, on her way home from class. But for the life of her, she couldn't recall when she had last set foot in the grocery store they frequented.

"Your metabolism? How often do you need to eat, to maintain your current weight?" Banner paused in his tapping.

Steve had to have been doing the shopping. Which meant he had been the one spending the money, lately, since he always refused to take any cash from her. "Four or five times a day, really. Small meals. I eat breakfast, usually, with Steve and Juliana. Lunch is typically a sandwich or fruit. A few snacks throughout the day. Big dinner." She answered absently. "But if I get caught up in something, or distracted, I forget to eat as often as that."

The questions continued on that vein for the next ten minutes, until the sound of a key in the door alerted them to the arrival of Juliana and Steve. Juliana burst in the door first, running for her sister, a huge smile on her face. "LYN! I FELL AT SCHOOL AND CUT MY KNEE!" she screamed as she slid to a stop in front of Brooklyn.

"What?" She raised her eyebrows, running her eyes over her sister, setting down the bowl she was holding. "Let me see."

Juliana dropped to her bottom on the floor, lifting her school skirt, showing off the torn knee of her tights. There was a bandage with cartoon characters on it over her knee, which showed through the torn nylon. "It hurt real bad, but then I got a bandage. It still stings, but Steve said that will go away."

Brooklyn frowned, but nodded. "Okay. Will you go change out of your school clothes? And bring me your tights after you take them off. I have to throw them away."

"Coat and shoes off first, Sweetheart." Steve called, coming through the door, his hands full of shopping bags, shutting the door with his foot. He kicked off his own shoes, coming over in socked feet, before frowning at Brooklyn. He put the bags on the floor, when he reached her, reaching up to cup her cheeks. "You've been crying."

"I'm fine." She assured him, placing her hands on his shoulders. "Did you get everything for dinner?"

Steve's frown deepened, before he bent his head down, pressing a soft kiss to her lips. "Yeah. Everything on the list, plus things for tomorrow. I also checked in with Carmine. He's gonna be doing up some of that herbed bread you like tomorrow. I told him to save a loaf, and one of us will pick it up."

"I'll get it on my way home from school." she promised, standing up on her toes to return the kiss to him. "Go entertain you friend, while I get dinner done."

He nodded, stroking her cheeks as he let her go, before going to make sure that Juliana had put up her coat correctly.

She shook her head, before taking a deep breath and picking up the bags. It didn't take long to put everything but what was needed for dinner away. Soon she was chopping and shredding, while chopped onions and garlic with chicken tenderloins fried at the bottom of the large soup pan. As soon as she was sure the chicken was cooked all the way, and the onions were translucent, she tossed in the finely chopped celery and the shredded carrots, giving them a quick stir, she began to add the chicken stock. It had been a quick hack she had found online, while researching different variations of the dish. Most people apparently used pre made chicken stock. Steve had been slightly scandalized, when he found out. But the days of spending hours simmering chicken with bones was gone, unless you had the time. Now, people used pre-cut chicken breasts, and pre made stock. The flavor came from the vegetables and the spices used. She ground up some rosemary and thyme in a bowl with the butt of one of the knives, before sprinkling it into the soup with a little basil and a few squirts of lemon. Satisfied it was on its way to bubbling into a decent soup base, she washed up her work area, before she washed her hands, drying them on the towel kept on the handle of the stove.

Juliana had indeed changed, and under Brooklyn's instruction, had put the torn tights into the garbage. Now she was sitting at the table, while Banner and Steve both helped her with her homework, which apparently caused a bit of healthy competition between the two men, to see who could help her find the answer faster.

It really wasn't fair to Steve, Brooklyn reflected. Banner was a genius, and Steve was an idiot who still used long division by hand. But he was her idiot. That warm pressure built behind her breastbone again, pressing down on her lungs and heart, making her feel like the room was losing air. Taking a deep breath, she steadied herself, trying to push the feeling away, before she went over to stand next to Steve, leaning on his shoulder, reaching out to run her hand through his hair. He had gotten it cut, recently, so it was shorter, and the soft fuzz along the back of his neck felt nice on her fingers and palm.

He turned his head to look at her, with a smile, before adjusting his position so he could wrap his arm around her, pulling her closer. She ended up taking a ginger seat on his thigh, ignoring Banner's watchful and curious gaze. Steve kept his hand wrapped around her waist, resting his hand on her knee, and she reached down to thread their fingers together.

The more she thought about it, the more she knew she was correct. This was her happy place. Feeling him around and under and over and in her. She owned him. He was hers. She would do whatever she had to, to keep him. If he thought he had seen her at her worst, he hadn't seen anything yet, if he tried to leave her. She would burnt the world to the ground, and sift through the ashes, just to find him.

No. She closed her eyes, pushing the darkness back, gripping his hand tighter.

He didn't want her to be like that. She didn't want to be like that, anymore. After Stelluto and Morozov were dealt with, she would step back. She would work harder on pushing all of that back to where it wouldn't bubble to the surface anymore. Banner might feel like he had no control, but she had been raised to have it. She had been trained to keep it. She had been beaten until she had perfected it.

Once she knew that there was nothing that could separate them, maybe then, she would tell him about the feeling she had begun to know as love, that was clawing at her chest, every breath that she was near him.

A/N : Sorry! i know it's been too long! BUT! i dont go back to work until weds! so that's what, almost a week for putting out chapters? Comment and vote!