"The snickered word "man" was repeated by Honey and the Twins."
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"I...I am so sorry!" Haruhi yelped, he was visibly shaking as he stood over the broken vase, tears collecting in his eyes.

"Eh? We were going to auction that off for more funds." The twins frowned and stared at the short boy who had paled tremendously.

"You look like you belong in Corpse Party*." Kaito said nonchalantly, watching his skin turn white, his frame shake, and seeing a shallow cut on his arm.

"What?" He stuttered in confusion. "I'm so sorry! I'll pay it back!"

Kaito laughed lazily, "The auction was staring at 8 million ¥."

Haruhi blanched as Tamaki began to smirk.

"I-I'll pay it back." He repeated, more shaken this time.

"Can you? It looks like you can't even afford clothes." Hikaru and Kaoru said blankly.

"What would you do, Tamaki?" Kyoya asked smoothly as if he already knew the answer.

"Do you know this phrase Haruhi?" Tamaki smiled happily, "When in Rome do as the Romans do. If you don't have money, pay with your body!" He announced proudly.

"Tama-chan sounds like pervert." Kaito wrinkled his nose while Mori covered Honey's ears with a fond sigh.

"Eh?!? No way! I sounded cool didn't I? Right, Kyoya?!" Tamaki whined, stunning Haruhi.

"You do sound like your intentions are indecent." Kyoya raised an eyebrow.

"Whatever!" Tamaki pouted, "From now on you, Haruhi, are the host clubs dog!"

"Eh?!?" Haruhi screeched loudly,

"Ooh, we are moving onto derogatory terms that destroy self esteem and sense of equality. My favorite." Kaito sighed dreamily.

"They're our favorite too!" The twins grinned and they cheerfully exchanged high fives over Haruhi's crying form.

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Kaito was yanked behind the couch.

I hope you heard the offense in that sentence that Kaito was feeling.

There he was, cheerfully talking about Mad Father with his guests and how he was going to make a new dating simulator soon, when he was brutally yanked behind the couch. Onto the floor.

Then he was expected to watch some random dude, (when did he even get there?) flirt with some girls.

Who was he again? Inu*? Ah, who cares. Maybe he could sneak away, wait-no. Tamaki just grabbed his arm excitedly. He's trapped until he rides out his happy high.

"He's a natural!" Tamaki squealed.

"Yeah, he." The twins snickered together.

Honey tilted his head curiously and looked at Mori questioningly.

"He." Mori repeated with a little smile.

Honey stared for a minute before a lightbulb flicked onto his head.

"Oh! He!" He giggled.

Kyoya smirked into his black notebook while Tamaki gave everyone weird looks.

"What are you talking about?"

"Nothing!" They chorused together.

"Hmm." Tamaki eyed them suspiciously before turning to Kaito.

"Isn't he great?!"

"Who?" Kaito yawned drowsily.

"Haruhi!"

"Who's Haruhi?" He rubbed his eyes as Tamaki pouted.

"Haruhi Fujioka, the one who broke our vase."

"What vase?" Kaito frowned.

"The one we were going to auction off." Honey chirped.

"Ooooh. Oh yeah, that happened. I thought it was just another weird dream."

"What the- never mind." Hikaru sighed as Kaoru patted his back comfortingly.

"Why're we behind the couch again?" Kaito wrinkled his nose and got up, walking away.

"SENPAI NO, YOU'LL BLOW OUR COVER!" Tamaki screeched.

The entire room turned and stared at Tamaki as Kaito got on a couch next to his guests and began to talk...upside down...again.

"Wow Boss, you're great at being discreet." Kaoru said sarcastically.

Tamaki had the decency to blush before going into Host mode.

"We were just quietly admiring all of your astounding beauty, it is never ending and gentle. Like a rose." He smiled dashingly.

"But Boss, roses die really fast." Hikaru whispered.

"Poetic as usual." Kyoya smirked and stood up, giving Haruhi a calculating look.

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"Oh, you're back." Kaito frowned in disappointment, arm froze in midair from hitting Hikaru with a spear.

"It was just getting fun." Hikaru groaned, leg frozen from where he was about to kick Kaito.

"You always show up at the worst times Boss." Kaoru pouted from his place in Hikaru's back, a light saber in his hands.

"Aww, now we have to host." Honey frowned sadly from his place atop a clock.

"Why are you wet?" Mori asked quietly as he balanced a tea tray on one arm and a tray of cakes on the other while a pillow was on his head.

"My bag fell in the lake." Haruhi shrugged and heaved his wet bag into the corner.

"You're really clumsy Inu-kun." Kaito said lazily, letting his arm drop and barely turning it so he didn't stab himself.

"Would you mind just calling me Haruhi, senpai?" He asked flustered.

"Oh, I knew that."

"Of course you did Kaito-senpai!" Hikaru and Kaoru snickered together.

"Don't question my wisdom mortals." Kaito sniffed and glared at Kyoya. "Especially you dark lord of the underworld."

"I would never senpai." He smirked easily. "Master of insanity and speaking in tongues."

"That's right, böser gläser kerl." Kaito grinned in amusement as Kyoya's eyes darkened dramatically.

"Do they normally do this?" Haruhi shifted nervously at the evil aura surrounding the two.

"Only always." Hikaru and Kaoru said together with a shrug.

"Yep." Honey giggled.

"Yes." Mori nodded in affirmation.

"Of course~!" Tamaki chirped.

"Oh...good to know I guess."

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It seemed Haruhi had interrupted Host hours, again. Well, a case of bullying and degradation at the hands of a pesky, jealous girl is a slightly serious matter, but still.

Ayanokouji was on the ground, the picture of a damsel in distress. Like a red headed Princess Peach waiting for her Mario.

Haruhi was looking horribly confused, poor boy, he had no idea what just happened.

The Hitachiin twins walked up and promptly dumped water over the two, which was probably overdramatic but Kaito lived for overdramatic scenes so he wasn't complaining.

"Did you think we didn't know you did it?" Kyoya chuckled.

"Did what...?" Kaito asked in confusion.

"Dump his bag in the lake." Honey whispered with a cheery smile.

"What, when did that happen?"

"Don't underestimate us madam." Kyoya finished.

"I'm confused." Kaito mumbled.

As a last ditch effort, she pleaded to Tamaki. "Tamaki help! Haruhi-kun suddenly attacked me!"

"How disgraceful." Tamaki sighed. "You're the one who threw Haruhi's bag in the pond, aren't you?"

"Oh shit really?" Kaito hid a snicker, he never liked her anyway.

Ayanokouji threw a glare at him at which he stuck his tongue at, his customers giggled and tried to pull him away.

"How can you say that? Do you have any proof?" She asked, desperation lacing her voice.

"You really are quite pretty." Her face lit up in hope, "but you are not fit to be our guest. I know this much. Haruhi is not that kind of man."

The snickered word "man" was repeated by Honey and the Twins.

"Tamaki-sama, you idiot!" She wailed.

"Kaito-senpai, can you tell me how you came up with Miyabi? He's such a sweet character!" One of his guests broke the silence with her gushing.

"Sure." Kaito agreed easily and started back to their spot as the hosts led Haruhi to the changing rooms.

"You see, I saw a cat and I thought it was cute so I made it human in a drawing and gave it the cats personality. Voila! Miyabi."

"Senpai..."

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"Hey...Kaito...did you know Haruhi's a girl?" Tamaki mumbled.

Kaito gave him a weird look.

"What are you talking about?" He scrunched up his nose. "Haru-kun is a obviously a boy." He rolled his eyes.

"No! Because-"

"That's not nice Tama-chan, trying to trick your senpai." He frowned petulantly. "I should cut your head off for this."

"Not my beautiful head!" He screeched and ran away.

"That's right, you'll only be safe if you keep running." Kaito grumbled, "Because I'm not. I hate running."
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Almost forgot about this XD

Corpse Party: A manga/anime/game that deals in horror and gore. Haruhi was pale as a ghost *hahahaha* and had a little blood.

Inu: Japanese for dog. Haruhi was called the host club's dog and that's all Kaito remembered.

Böser gläser kerl: German for "Evil glasses guy."

And I think that's it!