He'd spent hours lying straight, eyes shut as he basked in the warmth of a companion he'd searched for but never believed in until she got off that boat and wouldn't look him in the eye. For many years his hands had sought out warmth only to shiver away from the cold space beside him, but now when he reached out, she always reached back and for that alone, he knew he'd die a hundred times over if only her hand would rest in his for eternity. "I told myself that love was never on the agenda" twisting onto his side, he rested his cheek into his palm and looked down at the woman who knew far too well how to take his breath away.

At his words, Zoya flinched. God, she knew not to fear him, but somewhere deep within she feared a life without him, that their night together meant more to her than it would to him, that Saul was right and she really was that unlovable, that she wasn't worth the kind man who'd taught her how to make a house a home. Crawling her fingers up his bare chest, her lips pursed sidewards "And is that still the case?" Her voice was minuscule, so small in such a large room and barely anything if no one decided to listen to the scream behind the whisper.

Moving a strand of hair from her lips, Aditya pressed his lips to her forehead. "All I wanted was a friend" running his thumb along her jaw, he watched her eyes shut the second she snuggled into his palm. "But you taught me they can be one and the same, you are my best friend, but you're also the love of my life".

Her eyes shot open only to fill with unshed tears. Each and every time he'd said that she'd only ever offered him pin-drop silence in return, but not anymore, not now she knew how she really felt. "I thought I knew love with Saul" gulping away the ache his name brought, she continued, "But I didn't until I met you". She thought back to the very first time they were in bed together, miles apart but his story of pain yanked them together and now close didn't seem anywhere near close enough when they were by each other's side.

Pulling her up so they were sat straight, his eyes widened "Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

Nodding shyly, a giggle escaped her at his excitement. "Yes," she affirmed.

"Say it" he leant closer, "I need to hear you say it". He'd never had to rely on anything before, neither had he had to rely on anyone, yet here she was changing everything he once knew and goddammit he'd fall to his knees before her feet if it meant she'd say those three words that could glue him back together again. "Please" his voice cracked.

Looking up slowly, she smiled "I love you, Aditya" the revelation sent her crashing into his arms as he'd once crashed into her heart. The symbolism alone made her shudder toward his warmth. Allowing him to pull her into his arms, she cupped his face, head tipped up so her eyes met his "Is that okay?"

"More than okay" his eyes shut as he rocked her. He'd waited so long for those words to reach his ears, warned himself not to get his hopes up too high, but he had, of course, he had. Could anyone blame him when Zoya was the one he loved? "I want to show you how it always should've been, Zoya, I want to show you how it will always be with me".

"Then show me" she muttered into his chest, because she knew only he could.

And show her did. His lips tattooed on her skin in a mark that would never taint her innocence with ownership but remind her instead of what good love was, of what good love could be. His fingers wound around her wrist in protection from the shadows he'd never allow to take her back to the darkness she knew, for he was never her prison, she had made him home.

+++

"Hello" Zoya smiled innocently, fingers waggling at him. Wet waves of hair hung atop his shirt she wore, her cheeks were flushed red and there was a little jump in her step as she padded softly toward him. Wrapping her tiny hands around his muscular arm, her cheek found solace on his shoulder and a calm sigh escaped her lips.

"Hello" he husked, a grin etched onto his lips that wouldn't sway for anyone or anything. It had only been a few minutes away from her, but he'd missed her more now that he ever had before, perhaps it was because they were joined now, connected by a thread that held her soul to his? Peering down, he smiled widely, he adored her most like this, so ethereal and pure and all his in every way he wished her to be. It all started at hello and he'd forever be happy that it would never end at goodbye. Tipping his head sidewards so his cheek led atop her head, he sipped his coffee. "Do you think it's always like this?"

Her brows furrowed as she looked up at him "I don't understand" her lips formed into a pout he wanted nothing more than to kiss away.

"With us" his cheeks reddened slightly. "Will it always feel this good?"

"I think so" and for the first time she didn't whisper or look away, she meant it and she knew he would too. Whatever would come, they were in it together and she knew now that it could be this good, that it should always be this good.

Holding his phone up, he nodded his head "Yes, Noor?"

"AWWWWW" she screamed, rushing over to her husband. "Don't they look sweet?" Using a doughnut to circle the phone, she winked "Nazar na lage".

Rolling his eyes, Aditya shook his head at her antics. "How's the baby?"

"You mean Arjun?" She spoke between mouthfuls. "He's good, baby no.2 is fab, always hungry though" she shrugged.

"It's Noor who's always hungry" Arjun muttered, scowling at her, "Don't blame this on the baby".

"Look, Zoya, see how he treats me? You're lucky you've got the nice one, I got stuck with him" shoving him away, she waddled to the door. "Oatieeeee".

Standing on her tiptoes, Zoya gleamed the second he jumped up onto the couch "Oatie!"

Jumping up onto his hind legs, he swiped at the phone in excitement causing it to clatter to the ground.

"Oh, shit" Arjun swore loudly, lifting it to his face only to see the screen had cracked and gone dark.

"Looks like I owe them a new phone" Aditya laughed. "I'm going to go and book our dinner reservation" kissing her cheek, he released her, grabbed the hotel card and wandered out the door only to shout when he'd got outside, "Be ready for when I'm back".

Hoisting herself onto the side, Zoya swung her legs "What to wear? What to wear?" She hummed to herself.

+++

A sharp knock on the door brought Zoya's attention up from the buckle on her sandals she'd been trying to tighten for about half an hour. "Aditya?" She rose slowly to the door. "Didn't you take your ca-" her jaw fell the second the door slammed into the wall opposite her, falling back, she stumbled into the cupboard. "S-S-Saul?" She stuttered, face a pale white.

Kicking the door shut, he smirked coyly "Laus" he corrected, stalking her forward till her back pressed into the bar of the balcony. Holding his phone up in front of her face, his hand coiled around her jaw to keep her still. "Press play" he ordered roughly.

Her head shook in his palm "I, I don't want to". Shutting her eyes to hide the tears that had already burnt her scratchy cheeks, she released a cracked breath that pained her chest. This wasn't real, it couldn't be real.

"I said" he sung into her ear calmly, "Play the FUCKING video" smashing her more into the glass pane, he pushed his knee into her stomach till she almost wretched forward.

Tapping the icon, Zoya's eyes widened. "No" she sobbed, her hand over her lips at the way Aditya was hauled to the ground. "Please, no" her body shook against his, "I'll, I'll do anything, please just stop". Falling to her knees, her hands smacked his shoes as she looked up at him "Please just let him go, I'll do anything you want, any-anything, I, I swear".

Holding a hand out to her, Laus clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Were you always this damn overdramatic or is this part of your new act?"

The minute her hand rested in his, she gasped loudly, threw herself back and skidded to the wall. "That, that's" her hand clenched till blood imprinted her palm.

"That's, that's what?" He leant down, tone playful and lips curled in excitement at the way she wouldn't look away from the ring on his finger.

Sniffling, she grabbed his ring finger, tugging it toward her till the ring dropped onto her lap. The familiar inscription was scratched, tainted with drops of blood so she could only make out the word 'sorry'. "What have you done?" Zoya buried her face in her hands till they suffocated the sobs that sounded just like her husband's name.

"This isn't what I have done, this is what you've done, Zoya" he pulled out a small jar from his back pocket. "You killed your husband, AGAIN" he pouted sadly, "What are people going to think?"

"I didn't, I would never" her voice hurt to even say his name. "He knows that and when I find him then-".

"Why find him when he's already here?"

She frowned "What, what do you mean?"

Tipping the jar over her, Laus let out a raucous cackle that echoed around them. "Ashes, to ashes, dust to dust, always be careful Zoya when you give someone your trust" he warned.

Coughing, Zoya waved her hand before her face then glanced down at the ash-like powder on her hand that smelt of smoke. "You didn't" she shook her head. "HE WOULDN'T LEAVE ME LIKE THAT" screaming, she shoved him back as she stood. Swiping away her tears, she yanked the vase from the desk "Where. Is. ADITYA?"

Blowing some of the ash from his hand, he chuckled. "Right here".

Hoisting it above her head, she hurled it forward. Almost falling forward, her breaths rose, verging on panicky as he fell to the ground. Grabbing his shirt, she yanked him up "Where is my husband?" She pled, "Just tell me where he is". Sitting over him, she pushed a broken shard an inch from his face.

Licking his lips, Laus led back properly "Is this how you treated my brother before you threw him down the stairs? Huh?" Laughing again, he looked at her shaking hand "Stab me, I know you want to".

"I never hurt him" squeezing the glass tighter, she lifted it up, "And I don't want to hurt you, please just tell me where Aditya is, I'll go to the police and hand myself in after, or you can kill me, but please, please, just let me see he's okay, just tell me where he is".

"Where you're about to send me" blood spluttered from his lips, "Rotting in hell".

With one last smack onto his head, Zoya rolled off of him, grabbed the phone and blew away the dust only to see it fizzle out as Aditya's eyes rolled back to a shade she'd only saw on her wedding day.

Virgin white.

+++

It had taken Zoya exactly thirteen days and ten hours to return to the only home she'd ever known. She'd fought through blood, sweat and tears to get here so she could have one last goodbye before the police finally took her to the place she'd always belonged.

Falling to her knees beside the sofa, a small smile made its way onto her face as she ran her hand over the seat.

Throwing his body onto her lap, Aditya huffed "I give up" he pouted, "Just read to me, Zoya, I'll go mad otherwise".

Standing slowly, she gripped onto the wooden chair for some sense of support she knew he'd give her if he was still here.

Tugging her into his arms, he grinned "Say aah, don't make me do the aeroplane because I will" he threatened jokingly.

Wiping away a lone tear, she pulled open a cupboard only to jump back when a packet of marshmallows clattered to her feet. Covering her mouth, she lifted them up and held them to her chest. "Oh, Aditya, I'm so sorry" and she was, forever coming here, for ever putting his life in danger, for ever loving a man who was too good for her.

Twirling on his heel, Aditya pointed to his cheeks "Chubby bunny".

Letting out a sad laugh, she slid down the wall, banging her head back against the wall in the process. "I'm so sorry, Aditya, I'm so sorry" crunching the packet, she pulled her knees to her chest.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, silly" he winked, arms crossed over his chest in that familiar way that always ensured her he'd never allow any harm to come her way. "See" he bounced up and down, "It's our thing!".

Finding the strength to regain her footing, Zoya stretched out a hand "Aditya?" Dropping it the second the vision disappeared, her head dropped too. He had given her the world and more and because of her he'd lost it all, she did not deserve forgiveness, even death would be a mercy, she would live with this pain, she'd suffer for him because only God knew how he'd suffered for her.

A low whine from the doorway followed by four soft feet padding towards her dragged her attention from her thoughts."Oatie" Zoya gasped, crawling toward him, her hands found solace in his warm coat. Stroking his face, she kissed his head "Oh, Oatie, I've missed you so much".

Lifting his paws, he placed them on her shoulders then looked around almost confused.

"I know" she hugged him tighter, trying not to show him the sadness in her eyes. "I miss him too". Ruffling under his neck, she stood one last time and backed away. Goodbye would never leave her mouth because nothing about saying it felt good when it came to leaving a man, his dog and their memories behind, instead she'd be silent because she knew too well the price payed when she opened her mouth.

It didn't matter that she wanted to stay, this house was only a home if Aditya was here, without him she'd only ever be a momentary guest. "I'm sorry I loved you, I'm sorry I love you still" picking up the photo frame, she pressed her lips to his face. "It's just that I still don't understand how loving you could ever be a sin, not when it felt so right".

Sighing, she placed it down then allowed her eyes to wander around the wooden shack one last time before stepping bare feet into the icy snow. As she continued to walk towards the lake she had one thing in mind.

Saul was right.

Zoya was only ever meant to be the Winter's Widow never the Winter's Bride.

+++

"And this" the man opened the door, "Is my nephew". Crossing his arms, he huffed "As you can see, he doesn't exactly act his age".

Peering through his hands, the tall man let out a giddy laugh then covered his face again "Peek-A-Boo, Zoya".

The woman smiled "How old is he brain wise?"

"Seven" Nadeem smirked. Just how he liked him.

"Oh, I'm so sorry" she held his shoulder.

But he was not.

Well, well, well, what an explosive chapter. I'm sorry I broke your heart, I broke mine too. Yes, this is the end of part one and yes it had to end this way for what I have in mind, things change I guess!
But dontcha worry! Part 2 is in the makes! Ill keep you updated!
If you have any questions I'm considering doing a Q+A on Twitter or Insta, so if you're interested then please let me know!