Chapter Eight: Dreams Of Horror And Despair

(Holly, Jolly)

***

Rowan sucked in a gasp as she sat bolt upright on... concrete?

She frowned. When she had gotten on concrete? The last thing she remembered, she was sleeping in Robin's bed with Robin and Chrissy...

Then her hand landed on something slimy, something that writhed and screeched.

A scream in her throat, Rowan scrambled back as she saw a vine, fleshy and ropy, laying across the concrete. Heart thumping against her chest, Rowan whirled around, saw that she was... in a pool?

A coughing came, and Rowan saw... Barb?

"Barb?" she whispered, half in shock, half in confusion. Why was her Chemistry partner here? And where the hell were they?

Barb was still coughing, but she heard her. She squinted; she'd lost her glasses, Rowan noticed. "Rowan? How..."

"I don't know either. I just woke up right now," Rowan said, or at least she thinks she woke up. It... it reminds her of her previous nightmares, but this is new. She's never woken up in an empty pool covered in weird, writhing vines that screeched—or, now that she's realising it, hums with a strange energy that feels wrong to her, like the world's electric current has been distorted and has ashy flakes drifting through the air like some twisted version of snow. She's still convinced she's still dreaming.

And in all her previous nightmares, no one else had seen her, had recognised her presence. She had always been a spectator, a silent ghost. This was a new development.

And terrifying in its implications.

Shaking her head, she said to the normally glasses-wearing redhead, "Let's just... figure a way out of here."

Barb nodded shakily and stood up, Rowan following her lead. Once they were both on their feet, Barb looked around and shouted, "Nancy! Where are you?! NANCY!"

Of course she was shouting for Nancy; Rowan didn't blame her. If she was in Barb's place, she'd be shouting for her aunt and brother, for Eddie and Chrissy and Robin. Maybe she was shouting to see if Nancy heard, to help, but Rowan knew the shoutings more out of fear than an actual cry for help, especially when Rowan had the creeping, nauseating feeling Nancy couldn't hear them no matter how loud Barb screamed her name. And while Barb shouted Nancy's name, Rowan looked around, searching for a way to climb out of the pool. Maybe if they used the vines...

And that was she heard it.

A whimpering, chirping noise that Rowan recognised from her last nightmare.

Barb seemed to hear it too, as the two girls looked in the direction of the noise, and saw it.

A scream lodged in Rowan's throat when her eyes saw the same creature she had seen in that dark void—pale, slick skin stretched taunt over a knobbly, skeletal figure, elongated limbs, and an eyeless face comprised entirely of a mouth that split open in four, toothy petals. Its face-mouth was closed, and Rowan felt her heart rate spiking, her pulse thrumming in her ears, felt frozen to the spot, refusing to scream because that will draw its attention to her, that will have it realise she was there, even as her mind screamed, It's only a dream, it can't hurt you, you'll wake uo if it does, it's only a dream, it's only a dream, it's only a DREAM!

Barb, meanwhile, was not so paralysed, and screamed at the sight of the monster.

It whirled, sensing them even if it had no eyes, and Rowan's mind screamed RUN!

"Come on!" she shouted, grabbing Barb's hand. "We gotta get out of here!"

Barb didn't need to be told twice as they ran for the edge of the pool, and Rowan almost wilted in relief at seeing the pool ladder. But adrenaline and the terror of the monster catching them, of what would happen if it did, drowned the relief, forcing her limbs to move as she climbed up the ladder, hauling herself onto the edge.

Sucking in sharp breaths, Rowan turned to the edge and stuck a hand out for Barb, screaming, "CLIMB, BARB! I got you!"

Barb climbed the ladder without hesitation, her face filled with naked terror as the whimpering increased into high-pitched snarls and that strange, trill-chirping noise, the monster advancing closer now that it had scented prey. But Barb was climbing up faster, fear propelling her, her hand reaching for Rowan's outstretched one, she was so fucking close...

Then the monster grabbed Barb's leg and she screamed, feeling herself be pulled down. One hand gripped the ladder poles sticking out of the pool while Rowan grabbed for the other, lying on her stomach as she held onto it in a vice-like grip.

"I got you Barb!" she shouted. "I'm not letting go! Kick it! I'll pull you up!"

Barb panted, her eyes wide and scared, the whites showing. She kicked it and the monster snarled, but did not let go. Barb cried out in pain as the clawed hands gripping her leg dug in, claws ripping through fabric and flesh.

Rowan gritted her teeth and began pulling, trying to help Barb up, but she was only one person and even though she possessed many abilities, super strength was not one of them.

And she felt Barb's hand slipping from hers, the blood from a fresh cut she'd somehow gotten making it even more slippery.

Instantly, Rowan latched on tighter, screaming, "FIGHT BARB! I'm not letting go! Fight it! FIGHT!"

Barb tried, God she tried. She aimed for another kick, and this time she felt the grip loosen, felt those claws pull out. Blood was pouring down her leg, the coppery smell of it mixing with the rotten, almost decaying stench permeating this place. She didn't waste that opportunity, pulling her leg free with a scream, gripping Rowan's hand as both girls worked together to pull Barb out of the pool, but as it seemed freedom was guaranteed, something else latched on.

Barb felt an invisible force grab her like a vice, solid and unyielding. Barb felt herself being pulled down, and she looked at Rowan, saw the fear mirrored in her wide blue eyes, the girl who was her Chemistry partner, who wore a scowl and listened to rock and heavy metal and dressed like it, who didn't care what anyone said, fought back against the vitriol of the popular crowd and talked back to the teachers, who was standoffish to everyone but her family and her friends. Who had tried to save her.

Rowan was gritting her teeth, refusing to let go. "I've got you Barb! I'm not letting go! I'm not!"

But Barb's hand was slipping from hers, no matter how much Rowan held on, how tightly she gripped it.

And then it slipped out.

Barb immediately grabbed the other pole, her blood staining the metal crimson, and Rowan tried to grab for it again, but her hands passed through Barb's like smoke. In fact, despite being right in front of her, the other girl stared through Rowan like glass, confusion, panic and fear flying over her features.

Rowan's heart pounded as she realised she had once more become the spectator, even as she desperately tried to grab Barb and pull her to safety, even when it failed over and over again, watching helplessly as Barb gripped the poles with dear life and screamed in desperation a single name.

"NANCY!"

And then she was gone, a fog concealing her from sight as Rowan found herself in the woods, albeit dark and decaying woods with ash—or maybe it was spores—falling from a dark sky like hellish snow, like she had never been at the pool.

Like Barb had never been there.

"Barb?" Rowan screamed, getting to her feet, whirling around as she searched for her. "Barb, can you hear me? Barb? BARB!"

No answer.

Rowan's chest felt tight, her breath rushed and sparse, her heart seizing as she gripped her arms and mumbled, "It's a dream, it's just a dream, it's a dream, she's okay, Barb's fine, it's just a dream and you'll wake up soon and everything's fine, it's just a dream, it's just a dream!"

But even as she said it, it didn't feel like it. Didn't feel like it was dream, that she could wake up and everything was fine.

Didn't feel like that Barb—

No! She couldn't think that. She had to go back to the pool! She had to help Barb, save her from the monster or whatever else was here, even if it was all a dream. A horrible, terrifying dream, but still a dream.

Even if it meant using her powers.

Brow set in determination, Rowan reached out tentatively to her power, to jump, when she heard a voice singing.

Whipping around, thinking it was Barb, Rowan's breath caught in her throat as she recognised the song, her ears picking up a familiar chorus.

"Should I stay or should I go now? If I go there will be trouble, if I stay it will be double..."

She knew only one person who loved that song, who would sing it to himself when scared and alone in a place he didn't recognise, in a place alien and strange and full of decay and monsters. But her heart still stuttered when he came into view and he saw her and stopped singing, staring up at her with wide eyes, as if shocked to see her as she was to see him.

"Will?" she breathed.

When he nodded, Rowan felt like collapsing from utter relief.

"Will!" she shouted, rushing forward and pulling the kid into a hug. So what if this was a figment of her screwed up imagination, so what if this was a dream, she was just relieved to see him, to see he was moderately okay.

It seemed he was relieved to see her, too, as his small arms wrapped around her too, quiet sobs racking through his body, and Rowan felt her heart broke.

The kid must be terrified the fuck out of his mind.

When they pulled back, Will was staring at her, confusion warring with happiness at seeing a familiar face.

"Rowan, how... how d-did you get here?" he whispered. Fear made his eyes go even wider, and he whispered softer, "Did... did it get you too?"

Rowan frowned. "No, I just... I woke up here... wherever here is. Will, where are you? Where... where are we?"

If possible, the kid looked even more scared, face ashen and his lip trembling as he said, "I... I don't know. It's like home, but it's cold and dark, and... and there's a monster here."

If anything, Will's answer made her more confused and freaked out, especially when he mentioned the monster.

"Will, it's gonna be okay, we're gonna find you and bring you home. I promise," she said firmly, but when she put her hands on his shoulders, they went through them. Rowan's eyes widened, and so did Will's.

"Rowan, what's going on? Where are you going? Rowan!" the kid shouted, voice cracking form confusion, panic and terror.

"Kid, it's gonna be okay! I promise, we're gonna find you! We're gonna find you Will!" Rowan promised, even if she was promising a dream, even as she once again became the spectator that haunted wherever the fuck her mind dreamed up of. And as she became invisible, a roar came and Will's eyes grew large with terror and he bolted into the woods, running away from the monster as it ran into view, it's horrifying mouth open, coming closer and closer, and Rowan felt her body freeze again, wanting to run or teleport or fry the monster, to follow Will and keep him safe, to go to the pool and help Barb, to just wake up from this nightmare, she wanted to scream—

***

Rowan jolted awake with a shout, hands gripping the sheets, eyes wild, her heart barraging her chest as her lungs seized for air that came in spurts of breath. She felt lightning zing underneath her skin, felt the urge of her cells wanting to scatter and disintegrate and come back in another place, a safer place, but that seemed to be numbed by the terror and panic still flooding her bloodstream, the desperation she felt with Barb, the relief and panic of seeing Will, the terror of the monster running towards her, its' mouth open and hungry for blood. And even though she was awake, she still felt like she was still there in the dream, could feel the spores that had drifted in the air clinging to her hair and her clothes and her skin, could see the dark, rotting woods, could hear the monster screeching and chirping.

Could feel Barb's blood on her hands, could feel the fabric of Will's puffer jacket and his body shivering underneath her touch.

Robin and Chrissy had woken up themselves when they heard the shout, and their eyes widened at seeing Rowan holding the sheets in an iron grip, hyperventilating as her body trembled, her eyes large and frantic. Outside, thunder rumbled and the lights flickered as objects quivered, but her friends didn't notice.

No, they were more focused upon their friend, who was having a panic attack after waking up from, what they assumed, a nightmare.

"Rowan!" Chrissy shouted. "Rowan, it's okay! It was just a nightmare!"

"Rowan, you're okay! It's a nightmare! It isn't real!" Robin yelled, looking just as panicked as Rowan. "Rowan!"

But while they were yelling, they both felt helpless, especially Robin; Rowan had never woken up from a nightmare, much less have a panic attack afterwards. Frankly, it was terrifying, and they both felt not only helpless, but useless.

After what seemed like hours, but in actuality was only five minutes, Rowan felt herself calming down, her heart rate falling into a regular rhythm as her breathing slowed, releasing her grip on the sheets, as the lights turned off and the thunder faded away, the objects settling back into place.

But while the panic had faded, the adrenaline of the nightmare disappearing, the terror still gripped Rowan, even when seeing she was in Robin's room, saw her friends looking at her with concern, panic and relief, told her it had all been a dream, borne from her subconscious worry over Will and possibly enhanced by the weed.

She was too scared of thinking it otherwise.

"Rowan," Chrissy said, a gentle hand on her shoulder, her oldest friend sans Eddie staring at her with worry in her brown eyes. "Ro, are... are you okay?"

Rowan nodded jerkily. "Fine."

Robin scoffed. "Rowan, you woke up and had a freaking panic attack, and scared and worried the fuck out of me and Chrissy. Are you actually okay?"

"Robin's right; I know you have nightmares, but none had you wake up hyperventilating," Chrissy agreed, frowning. Her gaze softened and she murmured, "We just want to make sure you're okay, because we're worried. And you can talk to us. We're your friends."

"I'm fine, guys," Rowan bit out, but her stubborn attitude faded as she shrank into herself, feeling guilty at snapping when they were, rightfully, worried about her and want to help her. "Sorry, guys. I just... I need to head home."

Clambering past Robin and Chrissy and off the bed, Rowan yanked out her baggy grunge jacket and shrugged it on, zipping up the duffle and slinging it over her shoulder as she headed into the hallway and down to the stairs, where the phone was up on the wall.

As she did, she passed Robin's parents' room; the dark-haired girl was honestly surprised they hadn't woken up at her shout. Though she was glad; she didn't want to make Robin's parents drive her home just because she had a nightmare.

Taking the phone off, Rowan tried to ignore how her fingers shook as she dialled up the familiar number, waiting as it rung in the still night, hearing the creak of the stairs as her friends walked down them, after following her.

After what seemed like an age, it picked up and Eddie's voice came through. "Uh, hello?"

Rowan almost sobbed at hearing the familiar timbre of her best friend's voice, albeit a bit spacey, and she wondered if he was high or crashing from one. "Hey, Eddie."

Instantly, despite whatever high he must be on, her friend sobered up at hearing the quaver in her voice. "Rowan? What's wrong? Are you okay? Did you have a bad trip?"

Rowan shook her head. "No. I... I-I had a nightmare, and I need a ride back home."

A pause, then, "I'll be there in ten."

"Thanks, Eds," she murmured, and hung up.

Turning to her other friends, she tried for a smile as she said, "Sorry, for waking you both up. And leaving right after. Say I just... had to go back home early to your parents, Robs."

"Rowan, if you needed a ride, I could have woken up my parents," Robin murmured, her brown eyes still full of worry.

"No, no, I don't want you to disturb your parents. Eddie can drive me home," Rowan said, trying to make her smile wider, but she could feel it wavering. "Thanks, though, for a great sleepover. I... I really needed it."

Robin and Chrissy were quiet, the both of them still worried about Rowan. Though Robin knew Rowan had nightmares due to how she would whimper and toss and turn during the night in previous sleepovers, she'd never seen her have such a bad one, not until tonight. Chrissy, however, did, could still remember that night when Rowan had woken up screaming like she was being murdered, her entire body trembling, tears streaming down her face as she clung to Chrissy, sobbing into her. They had been ten years old.

Rowan had told her the nightmare had been of seeing her parents dying again, but now Chrissy was having a feeling that hadn't been the entire truth.

"Rowan," she whispered. "Your nightmare... was it your parents again?"

Rowan froze, but then nodded stiffly. "Yeah. Yeah, it was."

Chrissy wasn't convinced, having a feeling that Rowan had just lied, but she didn't press. She knew better than to press, that Rowan would either clam up and refuse to talk, or just change the subject.

But it didn't mean Chrissy wanted to scream and demand Rowan tell her what was wrong, even if it was hypocritical of her since there were things she did not want to talk about, things that settled heavy in her stomach like the junk food she'd eaten (she hoped it wouldn't do anything to her figure, would make her hear even more of her mother's passive-aggressive comments about her body). A look at Robin told her the short-haired band geek was thinking the same, lips pursed and arms crossed.

They sat in silence for the remaining minutes, time dragging past, until headlights flashed in the windows and the crunch of wheels on gravel sounded.

"My ride's here," Rowan said, walking to the door as Robin and Chrissy followed, both wanting to make sure she got in okay. It wasn't like they didn't trust Eddie—Chrissy had actually been on friendly terms with Eddie after the middle school talent show, especially with their mutual friend in Rowan, until high school severed whatever inklings of friendship were there, and Robin was casual acquaintances with Eddie, bonding over music even if their tastes were different and being in drama and being annoyed with Mrs. Clack's heels on the floor and being as straight as bendy straws in a small Indiana town—but it was more rather how they were still worried about Rowan and her reaction, especially now that she was pretending to be fine in front of them, even if she was definitely not.

Both hoped Eddie could crack through Rowan's shell and get her to talk, but they had a feeling even with Eddie, Rowan wouldn't talk.

That she would bury her nightmare deep, deep down and pretend everything was absolutely fine.

So they both watched from the doorway as Rowan opened the door and climbed in, waving goodbye as Eddie's van peeled away.

And hoped Rowan would be fine like she said she was.

***

Rowan was quiet the minute she entered the van, looking out the window. Eddie was quiet too, focused on driving. The only sound was Joan Jett's raspy voice shouting from the speakers and the thump of the music. Eddie always put in Joan Jett when she was upset. Tonight was one of those times.

Eventually, Eddie asked, "How bad was it?"

Rowan was incredibly glad he didn't ask her to talk about it, but  she didn't pull her gaze from the window, her mind flashing images of Barb, of the monster, of Barb's hand slipping out from hers, of Will and his words before he ran from the monster.

"It's like home, but it's dark and cold..."

Rowan suppressed a shiver. Dream or not, those words had lodged in her, the shaking terror of them making an impact. What had the dream version of Will her mind conjured had meant by that?

But she did answer. "It... it was bad. Really bad."

Eddie didn't say anything, before he said, "You know, if you ever wanna talk about them... I'm here. And I'm sure Buckley and Chrissy are also there as well. Plus your aunt and Alistair. You have lots of people in your corner, Graveswood. Just... I want you to know that, that we're all here, if you ever want to talk about it."

"I don't, but... thanks," Rowan said, looking at Eddie, a small smile on her face. "I'm glad, to have you as my friend."

"Feeling's mutual," Eddie replied. 

"Seriously, I... I don't know what I do if you weren't my friend," she muttered, fiddling with the hem of her shirt.

"I'd probably be in my trailer still, not driving at two in the morning from the Buckleys after coming down from a high."

"And I'd probably be boring and listen to whatever cheap pop music comes out on the radio."

"Nah, I don't think you would listen to that even if we weren't friends."

"You think?"

"With a name like yours, Graveswood, you were practically destined to listen to anything not mainstream. You probably listened to Fleetwood Mac and Queen as an infant and then graduated to Joan Jett and Rolling Stones."

"Don't forget AC/DC and Siouxsie," Rowan said, grinning. "And, of course, metal. Can't forget the metal."

"Damn right," Eddie said, smirking. They both laughed, and Rowan smiled, feeling a lot better now. Eddie could always make her feel better, always have her laugh, even when Robin and Chrissy didn't. He was her best friend of all best friends, her platonic soulmate. Practically her brother, with how they teased, insulted and ribbed each other, but they were there for each other, for Rowan to be with Wayne Munson to bail Eddie out of jail and be there for his band's practice and for Corroded Coffin's gigs when they could get them and when she could attend, cheering just as loud for him as she did  for Chrissy in that middle school talent show years ago, and try to attend Hellfire Club's campaigns as a spectator even if she had no clue what was going on and when not wearing a band shirt or a plain shirt wearing her own Hellfire Club shirt with pride, to be there for him when he came out to her and said he liked both girls and guys and support him, as he was there for her by offering to listen if she wanted to tell him about her nightmares, to pretend to be her brother at the concerts they were able to go to, just in case if any of the guys wanted to do anything to her, to do things like this without any questions asked.

Rowan truly wondered how she had scored a friend like Eddie, like Robin and Chrissy who had emanated waves of worry and a desire to have her talk, but did not push, and who made music like ABBA and Cyndi Lauper and Blondie  the fun songs they were and not tainted by mainstream view—how Rowan could also talk shit about school and society with Robin and plans for their eventual graduation and Robin could talk to her about girls without worry and they would debate whether horror films or the foreign and old and independent films Robin liked were better, and Rowan would go shopping with Chrissy and Chrissy would go with her to the Hawk when a horror movie was on and vice versa and how Rowan knew if she could feel crushes on boys she would tell Chrissy and they would probably tease each other about bad taste in boys but be excited if they got with said crush or comfort if rejected and she comforted Chrissy when the stresses of being popular and her family's, especially her mother's, expectations were too heavy to bear and how, surprisingly, Chrissy had been the one to introduce her to Siouxsie And The Banshees because as much as she liked Pat Benatar and Blondie, she also liked bands like Siouxsie and The Cure, a hidden layer under the good girl image everyone in Hawkins saw her as and wanted her to be and had judged Rowan for being Chrissy's friend under the shitty and shallow-minded excuse that her style and swearing and smoking and loving metal and rock music and living in a trailer park with a con artist meant she was a bad influence and would "corrupt" Chrissy when Rowan never wanted to change Chrissy or Robin or anyone out of who they fundamentally were, was actually the opposite and always strived to let Chrissy know she shouldn't change herself for anyone and be who she was, but try telling that to the conservatives who saw kids like her and Eddie and assumed they were Satan's vessels put on this earth to lure God-fearing teens into darkness (as if)—how they'd all drink milkshakes or Cokes at the diner or convenience store and she and Robin would have stupid contests and Chrissy would roll her eyes but she would be smiling and when they inevitably chugged their Coke or milkshakes Chrissy would win and wear a smug smile while Rowan and Robin would dramatically bemoan their loss and they'd study together, and their shared sleepovers, but she was glad for it.

So, so glad for it.

When they arrived at her trailer, Rowan hopped out, looking at Eddie. "Thanks, Eddie. For this. For just... being you and being an awesome friend. I... I really appreciate it. All of it."

"It's fine," Eddie said, with a smile despite how he ducked his head down, letting his hair shield it. "And like I said, I'm here for you. Just a knock away if you ever want to talk, or have a smoke and listen to some music."

"And talk shit about this town and about what we'll do once we graduate and get the hell out," Rowan added, Eddie chuckling.

"Exactly."

Rowan smiled. "Night, Munson."

"Night Graveswood."

Rowan slammed the door and grabbed her duffle, walking to her trailer and opening the door.

When she was inside, Rowan gave a loud sigh and slumped down, waiting for the moment the lights would turn on and her aunt would walk out of her room and see Rowan there. To lead her to the table and make the pancakes and hot cocoa. Rowan hoped she would. She needed that comfort.

Rowan exhaled a shaky breath, her mind once more turning to her nightmare. Because that was what it was, what it always was. A nightmare, a really vivid, really terrifying nightmare.

Even though...

Even though a part of her had a sinking feeling that it wasn't a nightmare.

***

Yeah, not a lot of good things happened in this chapter.

Yes, Rowan ended up being somehow in the Upside Down and tried to help Barb and saw Will! Unfortunately, she couldn't save Barb and she ended up vanishing due to it still being a dream. And she's still trying to convince herself it is.

But it did rattle her enough to ask Eddie to pick her up and take her back home, which he did immediately. He's that friend who would do that (did I say before how much I love their friendship? 🥺) And Robin and Chrissy also being concerned and trying to ask Rowan about her nightmare and if she is okay (again, did I say before how much I love their friendship?? 🥺)

And once again, Rowan's denying her dream wasn't just a dream! Sorry to say she'll be doing a lot of that for the meantime...

Next chapter will be out soon! 

Please read, comment and vote!

GhostWriterGirl out!