Chapter 40

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Star crumpled and bent over her knees, clutching her sides with her hands. She shook with violent sobs. She felt like she hadn't cried this much in years.

It was just so unfair!

After everything they had been through... Marco had almost died countless times, now this... no one deserved this fate, Marco least of all. Star knew how difficult it would be for him to adjust. He was so self conscious. Star knew that she and his parents would love him unconditionally, despite what had happened, but Marco... he wouldn't have such an easy time accepting himself. And he had killed two people. Star sobbed harder than ever thinking of how much guilt he would have to deal with.

She cried until her throat was raw and dry, and there were no tears left to shed. Then she stayed bent over her knees, hinged at the hip. She closed her eyes and took several deep, calming breaths, and the cold, clear air rushing in somehow soothed her.

Finally she sat up.

She leant back against a large wide tree. The bark was damp and deeply ridged. Star took a long, deep breath in through her nose and smelt dew, pine and soil. The sun was going down now. She heard a mournful toad croak quietly in the bushes, a lone owl call as it swooped through the cloud. Skuttering bats flew overhead, a dark swarm of chattering black wings and claws.

Star felt the air cool around her; it froze the tears on her cheeks. She wiped her eyes with her sleeve and took another gulping breath.

Shadows settled on the long black grass. Star watched the sky as it shifted shades, and her head felt oddly empty, and most of her feelings they were dead and they were gone.

"I've lost it all. I'm just a silhouette." She whispered into the night, her voice breaking. "A lifeless face that you'll soon forget. My eyes are damp with the words you left, ringing in my head when you broke my chest."

She closed her eyes again and held herself for warmth.

"And if you're in love," she murmured to her knees, knitting her brows and shivering, "you are the lucky ones. Because most us are bitter over someone." 

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