Of stories untold...

"Losing your life is not the worst thing that can happen. The worst thing is to lose your reason for living."

—Jo Nesbo.

Leticia.

Legs folded to her chest as she lay on the bed, she gazed into nothingness, ignoring the pain she felt as she rocked herself back and forth.

Her eyes were sunken, fingernails dry and short from the continuous chewing. Scattered and thinned out hair from yanking at it like the madwoman she had become; bruised lips from biting, and a trembling form.

She could not sleep, could not die, there was nothing she could do to escape the pain she so wanted to run away from. Blood seeped out of her vein where the cannula was supposed to be but she had ripped it out earlier.

When the door was pushed open, she heard but refused to turn back. The two ladies she had seen the day she woke up were frequent visitors of her room, then they started visiting with others. From their speech and body language whenever they were around, it seemed like the tall man and the red-haired woman was a couple.

They would always ask questions upon questions, but Leticia could not find her voice to answer. In fact, she had no answers to their questions. She couldn't tell how she ended up in the hospital because the last thing she recalled was being injected by the man with a ponytail.

The Doctors attending to her had informed her that she had numerous stitches on her back and that her floating ribs had been infected so they took them out. According to them, she was in a coma for almost a week. Then came the worst news; that she was pregnant.

Before she knew it, she burst into chuckles, whimpering as she chuckled because of her hurting ribs. Pregnant. Carrying babies, not one but two, and for who? Angel? Ginger-head? The other minions whom she could not even name?

"Oh my God! She's bleeding."

Even as Leticia heard that she did not blink. She heard the shuffles when the nurses entered.

"Miss, please you can't stay like that. You're hurting your ribs."

The words reached her ears but she didn't take any action. With all the people in the room, how was she expected to turn? How would she face them? A word that could express repulse in a maximum order was what she would use to describe herself, how much more others?

As though the nurse was in her head, she asked for others to excuse her as she wanted to redress her injuries. They stepped out and the nurse ran to her side. She placed the tray in her hands on the surface of the table and adjusted the bed. It didn't take long to dress the wound as soon enough, they filed in once again.

Leticia felt her bones rattle when a police officer dragged his seat close to her bed. Goosebumps spread on her skin like infectious rash and she shrunk into a ball, feeling cold sweat drip down her forehead.

It felt like a de ja Vu, and she could hear gingerhead's laughter, could feel his breath and hands on her skin. His nauseating smile; his ear-bleeding laughter; the screeching sound of his chair grating the ground, it all came rushing, stampeding into her brain like a bunch of bulls whose tails had caught fire.

"It is not real."

"It is not real."

"It is not real."

She muttered the words, slapping her ears with her palms as his voice refused to go away.

"Damn! I'd totally tap that another day."

"Shut up!"

"Black girls are fire, I mean look at those boobs."

"Shut up!" It came out as a mutter as she still blocked her ears by sticking in her fingers.

"Stop crying. It makes me want you even more."

"Shut up!" Leticia screamed, slapping her ears with more force. "Shut up! I don't want to hear you! Stop talking!"

She had gotten hysterical, oblivious to the audience that was trying to control her trashing and screams. Leticia had almost slipped out of her bed, and the sheets were ridden up and had also slipped off. The cabinet by her bed was laying on the floor. In a short while, doctors and nurses had flooded her room, trying to hold her down.

The reaction seemed worthwhile as the voices were soon silenced. Leticia took in a heavy breath and dropped back on the bed, her eyelids heavy as though a handful of mixed concrete was poured on them. No, not sleep! Not sleep! But then she wouldn't be in this situation if we always got what we wanted, right?

When she peeled her eyes open, the first person she saw was a police officer sitting a distance away and conversing with the couple from earlier. At that point, the red-haired lady looked her way and their eyes met.

"She's awake!" The woman jumped out of the seat at first but sat back as sudden as she stood, as though a realisation dawned on her.

Leticia noticed that it was a different police officer from the one that wanted to seat close to her bed. This one sat a distance away from the bed, out of her personal circumference. He took out a notepad and placed it on his legs with a pen.

"Miss please what is your name?" He held an expectant stare as he waited for an answer to his question.

She threw him a glance and looked away. On the outside, it would look like she was snubbing him, but inside she was in a battle; a battle of speaking her name. To form the statement was an issue, and no matter how much she tried her brain could not coordinate the word to be pronounced.

An itch in her throat made her cough, even coughing hurt. Oh, she would kill to have her normal life back, where she could breathe without pain and talk without forcing it out like a speech-impaired person.

"Le-" it hung. She tried it again. "Leti... Leticia."
As she blurted it out, a great sigh of relief followed.

"Leticia?"

She nodded.

"Leticia, what is your surname?"

"It's..." She trailed off. Wagner? Adama? Wagner? Really? "Adama."

"Okay..." He jotted it down and rose his head to stare at her. "How did you end up at their garage?" He pointed at the couple.

What garage? Leticia looked from the officer to the couple and back. How did she end up there? But then, she had no idea where she had been before ending up here, neither did she have an idea of how long she was there. Leticia was about to ask what date it was until the officer spoke up again.

"Okay, what happened to you?"

That question caused her to withdraw back into her shell. What happened? The part producing speech in her brain went blank, as blank as a fresh canvas. If only she could lock those events and bury them somewhere so deep that they could never be found. What words would explain all that she had gone through ever since the day Maverick drove her out of his house? Who would understand how she felt inside? Who would listen to her story without looking at her in disgust?

Leticia dropped her stare to her fingers as though they were the most interesting things in the room. After a while of awkward silence, the police officer cleared his throat and got up from the seat.

A change in scent had her realising that the red-haired woman had taken the chair where the officer had been sitting. Leticia met her soft smile as she shifted her attention to the woman. Now that she could see her up close,  she discovered that the woman was tiny in stature, and her eyes were large and beautiful.

"Leticia. You have such a beautiful name," she started, her smile still worn as she spoke.

Leticia glanced at her and swivelled her gaze around, looking behind the woman to the officer and the other man who were discussing in hushed tones.

"I'm Giordana, Dana for short."

This brought Leticia's focus back on her.

"So, how do you feel today? Do- oh I think..." Dana stood up and Leticia followed her with her eyes. "The windows are completely shut, should I draw them up for you? You're sweating."

As Leticia said nothing, Dana went ahead to pull up the windows, and Leticia's wandering eyes caught something. Outside.

The window! How did she never think about it? If she could not cut herself to death then the next option was to fall to her death.

Plans began to hatch in her mind and she spaced out of the rest of the conversation. She looked out the open windows and saw that the sun had already set. Meaning that they would all leave her be in a few minutes. The window was large enough to accommodate her sitting size.

Her view was blocked by Dana who was coming back to sit.

"I don't know what happened, but I can tell that you've been through a lot. I may not understand, but I can see the pain in your eyes and whatever happened, you survived. You're a very strong woman, Leticia. Whenever you need someone to talk to, I'm always here, okay?"

Strong? Leticia wished so bad that she did not need to be strong. The strength was a curse; survival was not part of her plans, neither was this place nor the people all around her, nor the smell of the place, the white gowns that hurt the eyes, continuous drips and updates that she was recovering well. All she wanted was one thing, and being here was a big hindrance.

The rest of the statement Dana made fell on deaf ears, as the only thing Leticia was concerned about was calculating when she would get a chance to jump out that window. It was calling onto her, like a hypnotic sweet and soft voice. She could hear the hymn of death, the only song she desired.

Her heart swelled in her chest together with her growing hope. Death would not reject her this time, she hoped.

They finally left, and a burst of adrenaline rushed through her. Suddenly, all the pain she had been feeling vanished. Leticia turned to the other side of the bed and let her right foot touch the cold ground, revelling in the feeling that rippled in her veins.

Her other foot touched the ground and she placed both hands by her sides, lifting herself up. The position had an impact below her chest but she swallowed the pain. If to inflict more pain was the way to end it all, then she would gladly do so.

Her posture was bent as she struggled to drag her legs along. The window still reached out, and she could feel the breeze caressing her face as she got closer.

A relieved sigh pushed past her lips as she succeeded in getting to her destination and placing herself on the window sill. Leticia pushed up the window sash and crossed her legs to the other side.

The passing breeze that enveloped her bare legs this time was also cold but friendly. She took in a deep breath, shutting her eyes to take in her final breath.

"Please death... just accept me this time," she said in a soft whisper.

Leticia let her legs dangle out completely and her body followed. The happiness that filled her heart at that point could not be measured. A teardrop slipped out of her shut eyes; of relief, of joy, of stories untold that would never be told. 

Happy New Year y'all, I forgot to add that in the former chapter as this is my first chapter for the year ❤
I'm sorry. I have no excuse for this level of laziness but I'm sorry. I sincerely apologise.
keilaese and chee_neye please don't kill me😪 It's the devil😂.

Please drop your comments, I love to read them and it motivates me🥺. I promise to reply them all.🤸

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