Alright I Wanted To Put This Out Here First
This Is A Very Sensitive Topic So If You Have Issues With Down Below Please Don't Continue.

(WARNINGS)
•Anorexia
•Depression
•Anxiety
•Swearing
•Suicidal Thoughts

Also Sorry For Disappearing!

~

"Your Not Fucking Pretty Enough!"

"Why Are You So Fat!"

"Just Lose Weight Already You Disgusting Slob!"

"No Wonder Why Everyone Judges You!"

"Just End It!"

"No One Cares!"

"They Only Treat You Right Cause Your The Queen!"

"No One Will Ever Love You The Way You Are..."

She looked up at her reflection in the mirror, her self esteem dropping like a roller coaster as she stared.

"Why Are You Like This"

The pink troll blinked away her tears and put her crown on, although she was upset, she was the queen and had to do her duties to keep everyone happy

Expect herself.

~~~

The village was quiet busy today, trolls walking, talking and skipping in every direction, smiling and laughing, not caring about what was going on around them, on the other hand, Poppy looked around.

None of them seemed to care about what they were wearing or how big or small they were. She wished every night that she could expect herself just to be perfect like everyone else but she couldn't find it.

From the corner of her eyes, she saw a grey troll making his way over to her with the biggest grin on his face. Every since Barbs world tour the two trolls have officially been dating and they both loved every single piece of it.

"Hey Poppyfur!" Branch smiled as he kissed her lips softly, she kissed back and smiled too, hiding the fact the she was in self pity "Hey Branchifur!" She giggled, a blush creeping up on her cheeks "So I Was Thinking Once Your Done With All Your Queenly Duties Tonight That We Should Head Out Near The Lagoon And Have A Nice Quiet Picnic, How Does That Sound?" He asked her while grabbing her baby pink hands. Her smile turned into a slight frown, though it would be amazing to be cuddled up against him while watching the sunset and make out, she didn't want to ruin her diet she started, all those cupcakes and sandwiches would only make her gain even more weight when she was going so well-

"Poppy?" Branch waved his hand in front of her face, she looked like she was deep in thought but didn't speak up in case she went off. "Huh Oh Yeah! I Would Love Too.." She told him "Ok Great! I'll Pick You Up At-" He was cut off "But" She Continued, the blue troll listened carefully, confused "I Was Thinking About Having An Early Night Tonight, All This Queen Stuff Is Really Draining Me" She lied, not wanting him to find out about her problem.

"Oh Okay That's Fine, Maybe Another Time Then" He looked in her magenta eyes, gosh she loved it! It was so breath taking, his eyes, his smile, everything about him was perfect!

"Alright Well I Gotta Go Help Some Trolls So I Guess I'll See You Later.." She kissed his cheek and walked away, leaving Branch alone.

She Usually Would Of Loved That Idea?

He thought but shrugged it off, There was always another day. He started strolling back to his bunker to feed his son Gary.

~~~

"no...stop..No!..NO!..."

Poppy's eyes flew open as she sat up, gripping onto her blankets tightly and breathing quiet heavily

Another Nightmare

She thought and sighed, looking over at her bedside table and reading the clock beside her

1:24am

The pink troll thought it was getting better but no.
She slowly got out of bed and walked into the kitchen, grabbing a glass out of a cupboard and filling it up with water from the sink tap. Gulping it down, she glanced out her window.

It was pitch black but the moonlight lit up the entire village under its presence. She hadn't even been asleep for long, about an hour and a half she guessed, the other nights were easier as she woke up between 3-5am, never going back to sleep.

She was tired, tired of pretending to be happy and giggly. She craved to crawl into Branch's arms and cry her problems away but she couldn't, she wanted to show him how strong she was even though she wasn't at that moment.

Poppy put the cup down and placed her elbows against the sink ledge, resting her head in her hands shakily.

"Just Do It"

"It Won't Matter To Anyone"

"Useless Piece Of Shit"

"It's Right There.."

The troll looked over her shoulder and saw it, right there, staring at her, aching to be in her hand.

The Knife

She made her way over to it and looked at it, finally grabbing it

"Poppy You Know Better Then This!"

"You Know You Wanna Do It"

"What About Your Dad, Branch And All The Other Trolls!"

"Why Would They Care, They Are Ashamed Of You But Don't Wanna Make You Cry Cause Your Weak"

She wanted to do it, she wanted to feel relived but she couldn't, she just couldn't. The pink troll threw the knife away in the trash and walked over to her couch, laying on it and staring at the ceiling.

"Why Me?"

"Cause Your A Gross Cupcake Eating Monster!"

"I Need To Stop Eating"

"Exactly You Fatso!"

"Ok It's Official!, I'm Not Eating Anything Until I'm Skinny And Fit!"

"Even If Thats Possible"

And just like that, the pink troll curled up in fatal position with thoughts roaming around her head and just laid there...

~~~

"Another Day"

"Another Day Of Faking A Smile"

She looked at her in the mirror deeply

"And No Eating."

"Absolutely Nothing You Chubby Bitch"

She brushed her hair with a brush before placing the crown on, applying some mascara to her lashes and putting her hug time bracelet on her right wrist.

"Okay Let's Do This..."

~~~

"Poppy You Have To Eat Something!" The blue troll told her "No" She argued back, she wasn't going to let herself, she gained weight to easily for her liking. "I Haven't Seen You Eat Anything Today Poppy" Smidge butted in "I Ate A Chocolate Donut This Morning Okay!" She lied, everyone went quiet "I Just Don't Want You Collapsing On Us Pops" Branch looked down at the grass, The pink troll sighed "I'm Sorry Guys I.....I-I'm Just Really Tired Today..." She buried her face in her hands.

The snackpack looked at each other and went up to the Queen, squeezing her into a tight hug.

"Oh Gosh They Can Feel My Fat!"

"I'm Probably Suffocating Them!"

"I Need To Get Out!"

"Let Me Go Please!!" Poppy begged, her chest becoming tighter by the moment. They all let go, concerned looks getting thrown at the pink troll. She loved hugs so why did she want to get out of that one?

Her throat was closing up, she couldn't breathe, her whole body was shaking with fear, the sweat on the palm of her hands making her nauseous.

She ran

She ran as far as she could until she couldn't anymore. Falling to the cold ground with Branch kneeling beside her, placing a warm hand on her back. She buried her face in her arms and cried, it was really getting to her

She was hungry, no starving!
She was tired
She was upset
She just wanted to fall asleep and never wake up again.

~~~

Suicide Hotline: 13 11 14