Hyeji's POV

Hearing the door swing open, I immediately knew who I was about to see. I couldn't slow the tears which streamed down my cheeks as I witnessed my boyfriend rushing towards me.

I notice his worried expression fading into one of relief as he notices that I am awake. He leans over the side of the bed and kisses my forehead softly before taking a step backward.

"What happened? Are you okay?" He bombards me with questions, most simply fly over my head as I just maintain eye contact with him. "I'm so sorry I let you leave, I don't know what happened with me but I accept it and we will work through this together. I love you and we will be great parents."

His hand brushes against my own, an attempt to take it yet I pull away, resting the hand across my abdomen. My gaze flickers to where it sits for a brief moment as I muster yet another burst of courage before facing him again.

"You don't have to worry about that anymore" I can't mask the bitter tones with which I speak.

"The baby's dead Yuta."

"W-What?" The break in his voice tears my heart even more as I watch him start to crumble. Tears immediately rise to the surface of his eyes, lip quivering a he takes a seat in the chair beside my bed, not able to stand any longer.

"I was way too nauseous considering that I was barely a week pregnant. The doctors told me that it seems as though the child was created dead. It never lived, not even for the smallest moment. I had a miscarriage on the street, Yuta. My body has been struggling to keep going after losing so much. That's why I collapsed."

I explain to him, knowing all too well that I'll have to repeat this all again as if he were anything like I were, all the news at first went through one ear and out the other.

The doctors had to explain around four times before I was present enough in able to process the information being presented.

"What did I do wrong?" His next question should stop me from what I say next. But the overwhelming amount of anger which resides within me can't be contained at this point.

"What did you do wrong?" I scoff, causing for his broken gaze to move up to meet my own.

Had today occurred differently, there was nothing that I wanted more other than to hold onto him and cry over and over again.

"The time that I needed you the most, you weren't there. You hesitated with every phrase you spoke let alone the fact that you had to keep asking about the supposed methods of birth control which I was taking. I needed you to hold me and tell me that we would figure it out together, yet instead you let me leave alone. It wasn't until I was in a hospital bed that you panicked enough to come and tell me what I wanted to hear. May I add that I had to resort to the person who stabbed my brother for comfort? Regarding the miscarriage, none of it was your fault. Regarding what I'm about to say, is entirely your fault."

I'd struck a nerve. Mentioning his friend seemed to awaken anger of his own. Shaking his head in disbelief, he doesn't say anything, waiting for me to continue.

"I need you to contact Seulgi and get her here. After today, I really need to consider how much you truly love me. I really need to consider, Yuta, if it was a good idea for us to get back together."

"Hyeji ah" Yuta snaps, moving to be on the edge of his seat. "I am sorry beyond belief for my actions today. I fucked up, I really did. But today of all days, we need each other. Whether you want to accept it or not, it was also my child who was lost. So forgive me if I don't want to leave you right now."

"If you want to have even the slightest chance of us working out, you best call Seulgi and leave. Mourn with Jungwoo for all I care" I want to retract all the words which I just allowed to leave my mouth.

"Waiting and waiting, that's all I ever do for you Hyeji. I gave you 16 months when you allowed the words of your mother to convince you that I wasn't good enough. The amount of parents who leave each other due to the loss of a child is overwhelming and you really want to push us towards breaking point too?"

Everything he says is right.

"Waiting for me?! You call sleeping with my best friend waiting for me? I wish you told me that because I would've started sleeping with Taeyong much sooner."

Lies.

The look of hurt and even disgust on his face proves that I have hit home and then some.

"You know more than anyone else, that I haven't given myself to anyone other than you in that way. To hear that filth from your mouth—if anything, it's going to be me who will be considering the value of this relationship. There's only so long you can make a man wait before he moves on."

Yuta stands onto his feet, hands curling into fists at his sides as he swiftly walks over to the door. Just as he opens the door, he falters, asking something over his shoulder.

"Did you sleep with him?"

I don't need any clarification on who he refers to.

"Never" I respond honestly, a swift shake of my head. Even after all I just spoke, I couldn't bring myself to lie and strike another chord of pain. I'd done enough to him.

I could've sworn a sigh of relief washed over him and he heard my response. He doesn't say anything else before leaving, slamming the door behind him.

—

Seulgi entered my room after 20 minutes. She was out with Doyoung when she received Yuta's call. She almost didn't answer it, yet he rarely called her these days meaning it had to of been something important.

She was lucky that the cafe her and Doyoung had gone to was only a short drive away.

It surprised me that after all of that, Yuta still contacted her. I half expected to be left alone for a while whilst he went to vent to my brother. At least he could do that.

Seulgi crawled into the tight space in the bed beside me, wrapping her arms around me as I just cried. We stayed like that for at least an hour before I had felt ready to talk about it.

"I feel horrible, he's your ex who you genuinely loved and cared for. I can't expect you to simply listen to me talk about our dead child" I tell her with all honesty. It's an unfair expectation.

"He is my ex who should have never been" Her response surprises me. "He was always yours and I stupid to try something with him. He makes you happy and that is all I care about. It took me a while but I understand that fully."

There is a pause between us as I simply tighten my grip on her, causing for her to chuckle softly.

"I said some horrible things, Seulgi" Is my first admission. "He did too, we both did."

"It's okay, if you two truly love each other then you'll figure it out" She says softly.

"Everyone always says that. Why does everyone always say that?" I can't help but question, slightly annoyed. 

"Because it holds a great amount of truth to it. Something like harsh words can be easily resolved, it just takes two people for it to work. Just because one side is ready doesn't mean the other is. One could easily apologise just for the other to refuse to accept it. If you really love Yuta and he truly loves you which I know for certain, you will work this out."

"How could you possibly know?" I frown.

"I know as whenever we went on dates or met up, his first question always regarded how you were. Anything regarding you had him practically flying to get to your side. Whereas anything that happened to me, he would tell me he'd be there tomorrow. With me it was always later but with you, even having broken up, it was always now."

Seulgi gently strokes the top of my head as she speaks.

We are both interrupted as the door slowly creaks open, as though the person opening it wasn't so sure they were welcome. Understanding washes over me as I see Taeyong stepping into the room.

As soon as he sees Seulgi, he just smiles tightly and goes to leave.

"Thank you, Taeyong" I exclaim, causing for him to halt in his steps. "For today, I mean it."

"It's okay. Really, it's the least I could do" His faze flickers between me and my friend before the next smile hits his lips.

"Take care Hyeji."

I can't help but feel as though that is the last time I will be seeing him for a while.

After his departure, Seulgi moved to turn on the television. There was no point in us simply lying in silence, the only sound being my crying breath.

There isn't too much choice of what you can see when you're in the emergency ward, but we managed to find some kind of reality show which was being repeated.

I'd always found some kind of enjoyment from these dating shows. I knew the entire thing was scripted and was far from natural, but something about all the drama between the girls was just really entertaining.

Jungwoo and I used to watch these shows after school and simply laugh at it. It was a great stress reliever, especially during the period of exams.

TV always provided a great distraction, no matter who the viewer was.

It wasn't until I reached exams that I realised why there was so much nonsense on television. It wasn't because they had run out of ideas, the stupid reality shows were something which you didn't have to concentrate on. You could start watching the program from the very last episode and it wouldn't make too much of a difference.

Sometimes when you needed to escape your mind for a bit, to escape the world, watching reality TV could help you do just that.

The pair of us were so immersed into wondering whether this girl was going to receive a rose or not that we didn't realise as someone entered the room.

I couldn't stop my eyes from filling with tears as I saw my brother approaching. He wore casual clothing, his hospital attire no where in sight.

He didn't say anything as he slowly walked over to the bed, allowing for Seulgi to stand before he leaned over the side and embraced me as best as he could without affecting the bandage wrapped around his still healing wound.

After some sweet talking to the nurses, he and Yuta had managed to convince them that Jungwoo was well enough to go home. The doctor advised him to be cautious and he would need to check in through a phone call each day before visiting in person at the end of the week.

Jungwoo was more than happy to agree to these terms. More than anything, he wanted to go home and after hearing I had also been admitted, he knew I would be feeling the same.

We caught a taxi back to our apartment. Seulgi hugged us both a final time before explaining she should return to Doyoung.

"Where did Yuta go?" I couldn't help but ask my brother as we stepped into the familiar warmth of home.

"To his place" Jungwoo replies too easily. "He told me what happened between you two and said he needed space. He'll be okay."

I knew Jungwoo wasn't lying. My brother knew how to read people. He would tell me if there was more to it then that.

Yet I couldn't hide my concern for my...boyfriend. We just lost a child, yes we only knew about it for several hours but the impact is certainly no weaker.

He was right when he said we needed each other.

"God, I'm so stupid!" I exclaim.

Jungwoo looks at me, confused, before walking up to my side. He gently places his hand on my shoulder before opening his mouth.

"I-I need a few minutes" Is all I can say in response before I walk out of his grip and straight into my room.

Sinking onto the floor, I sit with my knees pulled up to my chest, back leaning against the side of the bed as I just my thoughts overwhelm me.

The soft knock which sounds at my door alerts me that I indeed took longer than a minute.

"I'll come out soon" I call out from my position on the floor.

However, Jungwoo ignores me as he pushes open the door. Closing it behind him, he walks over to me.

His steps—It wasn't Jungwoo who was taking a seat on the floor, leaving a safe distance between us.

The person to my right mimicked my position as he also pulls his knees up to his chest. He doesn't stare at me at all as he simply keeps his focus straight ahead.

"This isn't what I meant" I mutter softly, voice wavering slightly.

"I know" He sounds so broken.

"I need time" I try to sound convincing but his presence beside me confirms that I am failing to do so.

"I know" He says again.

"Yuta" I don't try to hide it anymore as I feel myself breaking again. "I'm so sorry."

"I know, I'm sorry too."

With that, he doesn't object as I move over to close the distance between us. He immediately pulls me into his side as he wraps his arms around me.

Crying into his chest, it isn't long before I feel his tears falling on top of my head.