// TWO WRONGS (DON'T MAKE A RIGHT) //

Part I – Perfect Nightmare.

I knew the sort of power I held when I walked down the corridors of East high. Everyone wanted to know what new outfit I was going to wear during the days I wasn't cheerleading, and even when I was cheerleading, they still stared for reasons I didn't completely understand; but it was okay, I was used to it and it was amazing.

Some people might call me a bitch but I begged to differ. I was just one girl who didn't take shit from anybody. When I was a kid, I was bullied a lot in pre-school and one day, I just stomped my foot down – literally – and refused to be pushed around. And because I refused to let people walk all over me like I was a freaking door mat, I was dubbed to be a bitch, but somehow, at the same time, I became the most popular girl in school? I had no idea how that worked.

It was this 'don't fuck with me' attitude that made me the head of class in pre-school, head prefect in all my years in primary school and now I was the captain of both cheerleading teams in East High.

It was weird for East High to have two cheerleading teams and then go out for competitions as one team, but said competitions were so far out that our coach liked us to go against each other, 'Keep the competitive spirit alive,' she'd say with a feral grin, and then for the competitions, we blended our moves together to completely smash the judges.

That didn't mean that there wasn't a rivalry between the two teams – East High's Spartans and East High's Sirens. And even though I was the captain to both teams, I wore the cheer uniform for East High's Sirens and naturally, not meaning to brag or anything, that made the Sirens more popular.

So yeah, I knew what sort of power I held over the school being the Queen Bee, and I relished in the cliché.

Today, my vibrant strawberry blonde hair was in a messy French braid that literally took me two minutes to do – with some hairspray to keep it in place – but I knew how awed the girls were gonna be when they saw me, no doubt. It was exhilarating how such trivial things I did became such a big deal.

I didn't take it for granted.

Today though, no one's attention was on me when I stepped into the school and I frowned curiously. People were whispering as I walked by and for the first time in history, the buzz wasn't about me. I caught the words 'new girl' and 'cuff' and I was instantly intrigued. I got to my locker where my closest friends, who were both on East High's Sirens, were waiting for me.

"What's going on?" I asked Rebecca Harris and Kei Omasa.

The three of us made a weird pair – Rebecca was black, Kei was Asian and I was white. Some people had conveniently dubbed our trio Dee Dee, Lee Lee and Mee Mee, the trio from Dexter's lab and I had to say, it was pretty accurate.

Rebecca turned to me with a secretive smile. "There's a new girl in school."

"And she's got a cuff," Kei added excitedly, "everyone's talking about it!"

"She's got a cuff?" I asked incredulously, getting my locker open to remove my text books for the day, "Just how old is she?"

Rebecca or rather we preferred to call her Becky, rolled her eyes. "You know on rare occasions, some people get their names before they reach eighteen."

"Yeah but the statistics are like one in a million," I growled, slamming my locker shut.

Rebecca flipped her hair over her shoulder, no longer in it's beautiful afro but straightened to perfection. "Well then, obviously she's the 'one' in that million," she shrugged with a smirk.

"Literally everyone wants to hear her story and how she got her name," Kei was saying, still in that high-pitched excited tone. I was sure in a few seconds she was going to start squealing, "I mean, I'm curious! Aren't you?"

"Jeez, so she got it early, big deal," I grumbled with a roll of my eyes, slamming my locker shut, "it's not like we don't know how it happens or whatever."

"Quit being such a spoil sport," Becky laughed, nudging me in the shoulder as we made our way down the corridors, "I bet you're just as excited but you're just hiding behind that cool Queen Bee exterior."

"Shut up," I blushed, "I just really don't see the big deal."

"Uh huh," Becky teased, "See you during lunch, Queen Bee," she said with a wave because I'd reached my class for first period.

"Bye, Aoife!" Kei grinned at me, also waving before disappearing down the corridor.

I entered my class for English period. It was a double period with arrogant, pretentious Mr Jim Carreg. He was already sneering at everyone through his glasses and I was just getting into my seat just as the bell rung for first period.

"Now," he snapped and everyone in the classroom stopped talking. "I'm going to call attendance. Woe betide those who are late. Again."

Some people snickered. I doodled into my notebook as I waited for my name to be called, which didn't take long.

"Aoife Cullen."

"Present," I said in a dry tone.

"Well, well, who do we have here?" Jim said in his nasally voice and I looked up curiously.

I immediately subconsciously sat up at the sight of the girl standing beside Carreg's desk. She was really tall, probably about six foot three, and she had beautiful wavy dark hair that flowed down past her shoulders to stop somewhere mid-way down her back. She had on a fancy peach coloured cropped jumper, exposing her soft, flat belly and a short dark skirt that left her alarmingly long legs bare, feet disappearing into a pair of sleek black high tops.

Her lips were painted a bright shimmering pink and she had a sculpted kind of face, her jawline was sharp and angular and when she smiled, prominent dimples appeared in her cheeks.

"Hi, Mr Carreg. I'm Jade Hall? New student," she said, bringing out her timetable to show him, smile still on her face.

Her voice was like music.

I could feel my face flushing and warmth blooming in my tummy. I wasn't the only one transfixed by her – the entire class seemed to be frozen in time, just staring at her like she was some sort of fascinating alien.

And of course, when she waved her left arm holding the timetable sheet, all eyes were instantly drawn to the lustrous, velvet black cuff covering her wrist, signifying that she'd gotten the name of her soulmate.

I couldn't stop staring at it. I couldn't swallow and I suddenly felt my heart pounding in my ears. The name was painfully intimate, no one else was allowed to see it except the soulmate in question, and apart from my parents and seeing a few people in the store or when I went out, I've never been this close to anyone who'd gotten their name. It made me reach unconsciously for my own bare right wrist, fingers tracing over it distractedly.

Jim smiled but it came off more like a grimace at her, eyeing her outfit with disdain. "I'm aware of that, Hall. Take a seat and answer to the attendance sheet. Next time you're late, detention."

"Right," Jade said with a dramatic roll of her eyes that made the class snicker in amusement.

She turned to beam at the class like she'd just shared a secret with everyone and I felt my heart stop. Her gaze zeroed in on me for like, a microsecond, and I felt like all the air had been sucked out of the room before she turned her gaze away and made her way to the only empty seat in the classroom, right at the very back in left middle row, two seats on the left behind my own.

"Adam Devine!" Carreg scowled and the boy practically jumped out of his seat at the shout because he'd been staring dreamily at Jade.

"Present!" he squeaked, and the guys snorted into their hands, the girls giggling while Adam flushed a brilliant red. I turned just in time to see Jade crossing her long legs, flashing lacy pink panties at the entire fucking world as she turned around to wink at Adam and his face really couldn't get any redder.

I felt a spike of irritation.

By lunch time, that irritation was full bloom. I only had first and second period with the now famous Jade Hall, but even in double period Math and single period Chemistry, she was the whisper on everyone's lips.

By lunch time, the name 'Jade Hall' made me feel like punching someone in the face. Fucking hell, she'd only just gotten here but she already had the entire crowd of Spartans following her like lost puppies. They were currently at what has been dubbed the 'Spartan table' in the cafeteria, and all of them were staring at her with rapt attention, while she weaved some elaborate tale.

I stabbed my chips furiously, glaring at their side of the cafeteria. Kei kept shifting in her seat and glancing at their table as well and her obvious curiosity was about to blow my head off.

"If you're so interested, why don't you go join their freaking table?" I snapped, picking up my tray and heading to one of the empty tables at the back before she could respond, growling under my breath.

I ate my lunch alone that afternoon. The girls knew it was best to stay away from me when I was in a sour mood. I'd thought that by the end of the school day, the novelty of Jade and her cuff would wear down, but I was wrong.

It was still the buzz, but now it was even worse because apparently, the tale she'd spun in the cafeteria that afternoon had been about her name.

"She said she was depressed," Kei was saying dreamily while I shoved my books into my locker almost furiously, taking what I needed for assignments into my hand bag, "she'd been crying about some shit or the other and then wham, she'd felt it."

"It felt like someone was writing on my wrist," Becky said in a bad imitation of her voice, fluttering her eyelashes comically and pressing both hands against her chest like she was a love-struck cartoon character, "and then there was this warmth that just spread over my body. Her name – in her, shall I say, absolutely sexy handwriting – is probably the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"Her?" I asked despite myself, feeling my cheeks flush and my stomach heat.

"Yup. The soulmate is a girl," Becky waggled her eyebrows lewdly at me.

"But she said she's bi though," Kei said with a frown, "that really increases the competition for her attention. She's quite pretty in a weird kinda way."

I slammed my locker closed. "You're straight as a pole, Kei, and I really could care less about her sexual orientation."

"Uh huh, keep telling yourself that Queen Bee!" Becky laughed, throwing an arm over my shoulder and not for the first time, I hated my short height. I used my good grades, popular status and pretty face to compensate for the lack of inches. "Bet you're just dying to get in those drawers!"

"Ugh, get off," I said playfully, slapping her hand off my shoulder. I was the only out lesbian in our school – another reason why I had to be a 'bitch'. The cheerleaders had tried to bully me when they found out and a few insults and a slap to some girl's face told them I wasn't one to mess with.

"Don't forget my house party on Saturday, Aoife!" Kei said with a wave, "bring your own booze."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I grinned with a roll of my eyes, "See you guys later!"

I got home and almost immediately started doing my assignments at the same time trying really, really hard to get that name and that face out of my head.

*

"Don't stay out too late," my mum was saying, bouncing my baby brother Cathal on her hip. My twelve year old sister, Niamh, was on the dining table eating from a bowl of cheerio's and watching some cartoon on my dad's iPad.

"Be back by ten!" my dad called from the sitting room.

"Dad it's Saturday and I'm seventeen. I'm staying out for as long as I bloody want," I snorted at him, my heels clacking on the tiled floor as I made my way to him.

He turned to look at my mother for help as she followed me into the sitting room and she just shrugged. "She is seventeen, darling."

He huffed and rolled his eyes, focusing back on the TV. "Fine, whatever. Call if you have any trouble and use a condom."

"Dad!" I gasped indignation, making my way to the door.

"Two girls wouldn't really need a condom now, dear."

"Oh my god, can you at least wait till I leave?" I gasped, checking my purse for all my necessities. When I was sure I had everything, I was out of the house with a wave.

"Have fun!" my mum called before the door shut.

Becky was already waiting in the front of my house in her brother's jeep. I was taking driving lessons but I hadn't gotten my permit yet and to be honest, I didn't want a permit. I wanted a real license. But at the same time, I wanted to know how to drive by the time I got my license, so there.

Becky couldn't be arsed to drive. She said when she became rich and famous – good luck to her, I thought with a snort – she was going to have a chauffeur that was going to take her everywhere she wanted. In the meantime, she didn't a mind using her older brother or a cab.

I got into the back seat where Becky was waiting.

"Hey Aoife, you alright?" Jeff asked me with handsome grin, white teeth sharply contrasting with his dark skin.

"I'm alright, thanks Jeff," I replied with a smile, "how's life and the girlfriend?"

"So, so," he said with a shrug. My eyes darted down to his left wrist on the steering wheel, staring at his white leather cuff. When people first got their soulmate's names on their wrists, they wore a black cuff signifying that it was there but they hadn't met said soulmate yet. When they did meet their soulmate, they then got a white cuff together, some formal tradition or some shit and the white just basically said 'taken.' It was like after Jade Hall, I was suddenly noticing cuffs and longing for my soulmate.

Ugh, stupid bloody Jade Hall.

"Well you certainly look nice," Becky said with a smirk, nudging me in the shoulder.

"Not as nice as you though," I grinned at her with a wink, making her squeal in excited exaggeration and I laughed.

Her hair was back to its natural afro status and she had on a nice plaid shirt and jean shorts, her legs covered in ripped black tights, feet in black sneakers. I was wearing a short dress – the top half was black with white polka dots, clinging to my torso sensually while from my waist down it flared out in my signature blood red, the front stopping at my knees while the back went all the way down to the floor, my feet in short heeled black boots.

We finally got to the house party and I was brimming with excitement. There were cars in the lot already and I could see lights flashing through the windows, the loud bass of the music seeming to filter out of the house.

"I'll be back to pick you girls up at two, okay?" Jeff said as we exited the car.

"Or why don't you come back when I call you?" Becky suggested.

"Fine, whatever, you owe me," Jeff grunted and we waved as he pulled off the curb and sped off.

We entered the house because the front door was open and I was a bit taken aback. It looked like everyone from East High was here. But then again, house parties were rare so when it did happen, everyone was bound to attend.

"Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!"

Becky turned to look at me with a raised eyebrow and a smirk and I grinned deviously back at her.

"Why the heck not?" I yelled over the music.

"Fuck yeah!" she yelled back, and we quickly made our way towards the people yelling 'shots!' just in time to grab two shot glasses.

"To a great night!" one of the guys was yelling.

"A great night!" everyone else hollered and then we all tossed back.

I tried not to cringe as the horrible vodka went through my system. Well, that was the last drop of alcohol I was going to have tonight, I thought to myself.

"I'm going to find Kei!" Rebecca said to me, and she already had a beer bottle in her hand. I had no doubts she was going to be drunk as a skunk by the end of the night. And on freaking beer no less, that shit was disgusting.

"You do that! I'm going to mingle and dance! Let her know I'm here, yeah?"

Becky gave me a thumbs up before disappearing into the crowd. I made my way to where the music was the loudest and I began to dance. In a few minutes, I'd garnered a crowd, boys literally shoving themselves out of the way to dance with me while girls stared on with envy. The fact that I wasn't interested in them didn't sway them one bit, in fact, it seemed to make them more determined to catch my interest.

That only made me amused.

When I got tired, I got some punch after watching to make sure it wasn't spiked, before falling into an empty couch in the quieter sitting room and watching the party carry on. There were games like beer pong going on in the next room and something was going on in the backyard by the pool but I just wanted to chill at the moment.

"I am extremely curious about the colour of your lips."

I startled, my heartbeat soaring because I recognised the sultry voice even before I turned to look at her.

"What?" I squeaked inelegantly, hoping the dimmed lights in the room hid my blush.

Jade Hall smiled at me, dimples flashing before her gaze slowly and deliberately dropped to my lips, the action making my stomach clench with something hot and tight. "Your lips," she repeated, slowly stirring her punch with a straw and I tried really fucking hard not to stare at the black velvet cuff wrapped intimately around her left wrist, "are they always painted that blood red?"

I felt tempted to lick my lips all of a sudden but I resisted as I forced a smile back at her. "Yes, they're always that red. It's me."

"Interesting," she said with that secretive smile still on her own lips, and speaking of lips, she didn't have any lipstick on today. Her mouth was bare and pale and pink and, I loathed to admit it, so fucking inviting.

"Would it be rude," she asked in a low sensual tone that sent shivers rushing up my spine, and the way she kept stirring her drink was becoming hypnotising, "for me to ask if I can kiss all that red off your lips?"

I stared at her, mouth agape at her bluntness, stomach roiling with emotions I didn't recognise.

"W-What?" I sputtered, "Of course that's rude!" I snapped, getting up from the couch, suddenly irritated, "Fuck off, man."

And then I was making my way to the pool, ignoring the throb of my heartbeat in my ears. There was an actual barbeque going on outside, and there were people in and out of the pool, the noise here just people talking and laughing, the music a low pulse in the house behind me. I spotted Kei wearing an apron and taking care of the barbeque, so I made my way over to her.

"Hey!" I said with a wave. I glanced around and spotted Becky in the pool already making out with some guy, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck. I shook my head fondly and turned back to Kei. "Nice party."

"Why, thank you. You're just in time as well, these are the last batch," she said with a smile, nodding down at the burgers frying. She looked really weird, dressed up for the party in a nice, short black dress and then the frilly apron on top just made her look ridiculous.

I giggled into my palm at the sight of her when I suddenly felt a presence.

I turned around, and it seemed everyone was staring as well, and felt my eyes grow wide at the sight of Jade Hall taking off her clothes to get in the pool. She'd been wearing a nice free flowing cream dress that stopped at her knees, but now she easily chucked it over her head and dumped it where the rest of the pile of clothes were. She kicked off her wedges and jumped straight into the pool in her fucking underwear. Something purple and lacy and –

I whipped my face away, ignoring the burn in my cheeks and the way the guys in the pool were hooting at her entrance.

"Whoo-hoo!" I heard her yell before giggling excitedly, the water splashing loudly behind me.

"I'm going inside," I growled at Kei and she looked up at me questioningly because of my sharp tone.

"No burger?" she asked, ignoring my obvious bad mood, nodding at the barbeque.

"No thanks, maybe save me one?" I asked hopefully.

She smiled and shrugged. "I'll try. These babies are going fast."

I laughed and waved, "Catch you later," before disappearing inside the house.

I ignored my irritation, downright refusing to ask myself just what exactly I was irritated about as I made my way through the rooms in the house. I was bored now. There was only so much to do in a house party. Maybe I should check out the games. Or look around in the rooms for possible gossip on Monday. But I really needed to pee first. I made my way upstairs in the direction of the bathroom and groaned inwardly at the sight of the line of people waiting.

Great. I wasn't pressed but I was sure by the time half of these people had used the toilet, I would be hopping from one foot to another. This was definitely my number one pet peeve in house parties – the freaking bathroom line.

I stood there, resting against the wall, the girls in front of me chatting. Someone was moaning on the floor.

"Is she okay?" I nodded at her frame.

"Yeah, just drunk," the girl in front of me replied before turning to continue her conversation with her friend.

I sighed and sank against the wall, staring at my nails. I had to remember to get my mum to take me to the saloon to get a manicure tomorrow. There was a suddenly silence in the space apart from the music and I looked up, blinking in surprise at the sight of Jade making her way down the line, wrapped in a big fluffy white towel, her wavy hair now straight and silky, framing her bare shoulders.

Wait, bare? I thought with mortification. Was she naked? Oh my God!

I tore my gaze away from her, my heart now pounding as she approached. Oh God, please let her be going somewhere else. Please let her be going somewhere else. Please let her be –

I squeaked when she grabbed my wrist and dragged me right to the front of the line and banged on the bathroom door, "Yo! Are you dead in there?" she yelled while I desperately tried to get my hand out of her grasp.

The girls in the line were glaring daggers at us but none of them dared to speak, suddenly remembering this was Queen Bee Aoife they were dealing with, along with new girl Jade, and I had a sneaky feeling Jade was also one person you didn't want to mess with.

The door opened and the girl had barely left before Jade was pulling me inside and locking the door behind us.

I could feel my heart pounding frantically in my throat. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" I yelled, staring at her because she'd bodily blocked the door.

I felt my breath hitch when she dropped the towel. She was wearing underwear, thank God, her bra just happened to be strapless and made of the sheerest purple lace just like the panties, wet and moulding to her milky white skin and –

"What the fucking hell!" I gasped with a blush, turning my face away and taking an automatic step back.

She walked up to me and I was almost hyperventilating as she cupped my jaw in her hand. I felt my heartbeat throb when her cuff brushed against my chin. She tilted my face up so I was looking at her and I fucking hated how stupidly tall she was and those stupid fucking dimples and that stupid ugly smile that just never left her stupidly attractive face.

"Aoife," she whispered, "Has anyone ever told you just how beautiful your name is?"

"Her name – in her, shall I say, absolutely sexy handwriting – is probably the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

I couldn't breathe and couldn't control the way my gaze instantly dropped to her cuff. Was it –? Could it be –? No, that was too much of a fucking coincidence – it couldn't be – it certainly couldn't be me, now could it?

"Aoife," she breathed again and that sexy smirk wasn't even on her face anymore, she was staring at me with such intensity it made my insides turn to mush and fuck, never has my name sounded so fucking sexy until now. Her face tilted towards mine and I could barely breathe.

What the fuck are you doing? My mind was screaming at me. This is ridiculous! Get the hell out of this bathroom! This bitch has the fucking nerve! Who the hell does she think she is assuming that you're just going to jump on her wagon?

She moved slowly, obviously giving me the chance to pull away, and that was what sealed the deal for me and I was instantly getting on my tiptoes and clumsily smashing my mouth against hers. She made a sound in the back of her throat that made my entire body go hot before her tongue was swiping out to lick against my lips and then holy hell she was sucking my lower lip into her mouth.

I moaned.

Her hands dropped right down to grab my ass as she pulled me tightly against her body, our breasts moulding together. The kiss was hot and passionate at first and then it just got wet and hungry and oh my God this was my first kiss and it was fucking awesome.

An abrupt knock on the door made us nearly jump into the ceiling.

"Hey!" a male voice called through the door, "What the fuck is going on in there? There are people dying for a piss here, man! Find another make-out spot!"

I felt my entire body go red. Oh my God. Oh my God, what the hell had I just done? I practically ran to the door and shoved it open, not even looking at where I was going. I recognised Kei's room at the end of the corridor and I made my way there hoping to God no one was in there but of course Jade followed me and of fucking course the room was empty, and the click of the lock sounded so loud as Jade turned it.

I stared at her, expression probably as wild as hers, and then she was stalking up to me and we were kissing again almost furiously and I was so fucking fucked.

*

"But just exactly how far did you go?"

"Tell me you at least went second base. Everyone said she was naked."

"Why was I drunk," Becky moaned in dismay.

"And making out with Kevin," Kei added.

Becky blushed. "Not helping, Kei."

Kei shrugged with a giggle, and I groaned. "She wasn't naked. She had a towel on," I said with a blush as Kei whistled lewdly, "We kissed," I stressed because this was the millionth time this week that Becky and Kei were asking me about this, "We kissed a lot. And it was amazing, but it was just kissing and nothing more. And it's not going to happen again," I added that last part with extra conviction.

It wasn't going to happen again.

It wasn't.

"Why not?" Kei moaned in disappointment, and for a second there one would think she was the one missing out on making out with Jade and not me. Not that I was missing out on anything incredible or whatever.

"I hate her," I replied simply.

"Why?" Kei groaned even more dramatically, making Becky laugh and me roll my eyes again. God, my eyes were going to fall out of their damn sockets if Kei continued with the stupid questions.

"Are you kidding?" I replied, "Ever since she stepped foot in East High, she's been acting like the whole damn world revolves around her. She's so fucking conceited it hurts. I just want to knock her stupid ego down a billion pegs."

"Whoa," Kei said in surprise at the vehemence in my tone, and I blushed a little guiltily because I did get carried away there.

"Hate sex is the best though," Becky shrugged with a nod, and I huffed out a breath at her, unable to help but smile fondly as I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and changed my shoes to get ready for cheerleading practice.

Becky and Kei changed as well, and then we, along with the other girls on the team, were making our way to the field. The Spartans were dressed in attires of navy blue and yellow, while the sirens where dressed in black, white, and red.

"Alright ladies!" Coach Mann called out to us and we all huddled in our various teams. "Remember the routines we did last week! Captain, watch the Sirens and I'll take care of the Spartans. Do your stretches and we'll start from the top! Go!"

I turned to the Sirens and they all looked at me eagerly.

"You heard the coach," I yelled out, "One lap around the field and meet back here to finish the stretches. Got it?"

"Aye aye, captain!"

I grinned. I could never get enough of that response, even though the girls initially did it sarcastically just to piss me off, now it was part of the routine.

I started the lap around the field, and the girls followed closely behind me in a leisurely jog. This was to get our blood flowing and loosen our limbs, and then we did stretches for thirty minutes to loosen them even more before we started with Coach Mann's vigorous training.

The Coach was just like her name – heavily built with muscles everywhere you'd think she'd be a coach for a football team or something. But don't be deceived by those muscles, Coach could jump higher than any one on the team, do a triple spin, split and ten consecutive backflips all at the same time without breaking a sweat. I guess that was why she was coach in the first place.

"Hey, don't do anything rash but new girl, six o'clock," Becky said when she jogged up to me.

"What?" I sputtered, before nearly snapping my neck off as I spun around, and sure enough, there was none other than Jade Hall talking to Coach Mann, dressed in the signature yellow and blue uniform for the Spartans. "Oh, for fuck's sake!" I gasped angrily, turning back around and speeding up my jog to a run because now I needed to burn the stupid energy building up inside me at the sight of her face.

Christ, I had one class with her every bloody day of the week and on Thursday and Friday, I was so happy I didn't get to see her stupid face and now she joined the team? When did she even try out? Why didn't Coach Mann let me know? This was complete bullshit!

"Captain!" Coach called and I gritted my teeth so hard it felt like I'd popped my jaw.

I ran up to her. "Yes, coach?"

Mann slapped a hand on Jade's shoulder and I smirked when she visibly winced at the weight and harsh grip. "Jade Hall is going to be joining the Spartans as from today. I'll take care of the teams while you show her the ropes."

"What?" I asked, refusing to look at Jade and the smug grin that was probably on her face, "Why can't I take care of the girls instead?"

"No. Get her through the warm-ups, break down the rules, give her the history, blah blah blah. I'm out. GIRLS GET IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FIELD! NOW!"

And I was dismissed.

I seethed for a second before looking at Jade with a sickly sweet smile.

"We begin with one lap around the field," I said and didn't even wait before I was jogging around the field again.

I could feel the gaze of everyone on the field on us. Sure, the entire school knew about what had happened on Saturday, they didn't know the details of course because for some reason Jade hadn't blabbed about it and I wasn't willing to talk so no one really knew what happened exactly.

What I'd told Becky and Kei had been the truth though. We'd only kissed. Like, a lot. Like, we'd kissed so much that by the time the night ended and I was ready to go home, I couldn't feel my lips, my lipstick was gone, and I was trembling slightly from head to toe. I hated to say it, but it was fucking amazing. I was shocked she didn't want to go further than that and I would have shot her down instantly if that had happened, but it didn't. She'd seemed quite content with just kissing me.

And then the way she'd looked at me after, tracing my swollen lips with her thumb as she whispered huskily, "Should've known they'd be this pink."

Oh God, what the hell was I thinking about? I thought furiously, trying not to blush at the memory.

Jade caught up with me easily and kept her pace up with mine as we jogged.

"You've been avoiding me, Aoife."

Quit saying my name like that, I thought angrily. "Have I?" I replied, "I had no idea."

She had the gall to laugh. "Yes, you have. And I have a feeling it was because of what occurred on Saturday?"

"I really don't give a shit about your feelings."

"God, you're so feisty. It's fucking hot."

I felt myself blush all the way down to the roots of my hair.

"And then you blush like that right after, it's endearing. Aoife."

"Quit saying my name like that!" I finally blurted, "God!"

She laughed, "But your name is so pretty, princess."

"Princess?" I gasped in indignation, so shocked and angry I had to stop jogging, turning to glare at her, "What the fuck is your problem?"

She'd stopped jogging as well. "I don't have a problem," she shrugged, "You're beautiful. I like you."

I blushed even harder, my eyes darting down to her cuff before quickly darting back to her face, the blush on my face deepening. Something hardened in her gaze at the action, and I suddenly had a bad feeling.

I took a step back. "Well, whatever happened on Saturday, just know that it's not happening again."

Jade took a step forward, raising one of her perfectly drawn eyebrows at me. "Are you sure about that?" her gaze dropped to my lips, "Didn't you enjoy the way I wiped all that red off your lips on Saturday?"

"No," I squeaked, warmth blooming in my tummy at the memory, my face burning at her bluntness. Jesus, did she not have a brain to mouth filter? The shit that spewed from her mouth should be in pórn or something!

"I don't believe that," she whispered and how the hell had she gotten so close, I could feel her breath on my lips and oh God, I couldn't move my feet, this was bad, this was bad –

I breathed in shakily when she took a few steps back but the heat in her dark brown eyes didn't disappear. "Show me the ropes, captain," she said, burning a hole through my skull at how intensely she was looking at me.

Oh my God! Even the way she said that sounded like a cheesy pórn line!

I swallowed and managed to tell her the rules and do the stretches with her, trying not to stare at the expanse of her long slim legs or the way her body curved easily, sensually and effortlessly. She was so freaking agile it made me hate her a bit more.

When practice was over, I tried to run. I was practically speed-walking to the locker rooms, wanting to get my stuff and get the hell off of school grounds but I wasn't fast enough because a familiar hand was wrapping around my wrist and pulling me so hard I had to jog to keep up with her. She took me right out of the locker rooms, and I could feel my heart threatening to jump right out of my ribcage.

"Jade!" I whispered harshly, because I knew the bell for school over was going to go off really soon, "what the fuck are you doing? Let go of me this instant!"

She led me to the Chemistry lab and slammed the door open. Everyone in the lab gasped, and Mrs Morell turned to stare at us like we'd grown two heads.

I felt myself die a little inside.

"Whoops, thought this was free," Jade said with a laugh, "Got to try Physics then."

"Oh my God," I gasped with mortification as she pulled me away, the door swinging shut in our departure as she led us towards the Physics Lab.

Oh God, what the hell. Oh God, everyone was going to talk about this now – Jade Hall dragged Aoife into the Chemistry lab to make out! Right in the middle of class! Can you believe that?

The Physics lab was empty when we got there, and I had barely taken in a breath when Jade was pushing me against the laboratory door and was suddenly kissing me, parting my lips to slide her tongue into my mouth. A full body shiver rushed through me and I gasped against her lips, trying to shove my hands into her hair but it was up in the signature pony tail of the cheerleaders. I made a small sound of disapproval before removing the scrunchie holding her hair up.

Those soft, beautiful waves fell into my hands and I ran my fingers hungrily through them.

She pulled away with a moan, her already dark brown eyes now even darker. She slowly reached down to remove my own scrunchie and I blinked as my strawberry blonde hair fell down to frame my face and shoulders.

"You're fucking beautiful," she whispered and I blushed down to my toes. With the way she was staring at me, I felt beautiful.

She lifted her left hand up to cup my face and I couldn't help glancing at her cuff, almost nervously.

She smiled, "do you want to touch it?"

I felt myself blush even harder, my heart thumping so hard it was painful. "Am I allowed to do that?" I asked incredulously, hating myself for even wanting to. But God, I wanted to. So badly.

She shrugged. "I'm allowing you."

"B-But," I stuttered nervously, "that's really intimate. Isn't it your soulmate that's supposed to –?"

"Aoife," she interrupted gently, "Just touch it. I can see how bad you want to."

"Shut up," I flushed, staring down at the floor in embarrassment at how easily she could read me.

She took my hand and my heartbeat went haywire as she wrapped the fingers of my left hand around the soft velvet. My breath hitched loudly and Jade shivered visibly. I stroked my thumb directly over where I imagined her name would be, and she let out a soft gasp of surprise.

"Oh," she whispered, her voice as deep as I've ever heard it.

My entire body was hot and the heat in my belly was intense. I looked up at her, locking our gazes together as I leaned forward and boldly placed a kiss directly over where her mark would be.

I felt something electric shoot up my spine just as Jade whispered, "Holy shit," her entire body shaking as she bit her lower lip. Her fingers curled and she seemed to press her wrist even more directly against my lips before she came to her senses and slowly pulled her hand away.

Wow. Fuck. That was the most intense thing I have ever done and all I'd done was kiss her stupid wrist, yet my entire body was still electrified and I felt like I was in a pleasured trance.

"Where are you going to get your name?" Jade asked huskily.

I swallowed and lifted my right hand, feeling strangely naked as I bared my right wrist to her.

"You're left handed?" she asked, because the names only appeared on the less dominant wrist, and I nodded, making her smile. "You're just special from head to toe, aren't you?"

Before I could retort she was taking my right wrist to her lips and kissing it softly. I gasped and felt like I was about to fly into the roof.

"Jesus, Jade," I whimpered and then moaned loudly, my knees wobbling when she parted her lips and sucked. My free hand flew into her hair and tugged hard, making her hiss through her teeth before she was suddenly kissing me again.

We kissed furiously for a few seconds, my wrist tingling from the touch of her lips and tongue before the bell went off, nearly making us both jump out of our skins in surprise.

Jade giggled against my mouth before pulling away to stare at me. She brushed her fingers against the inside of my wrist, making my eyelids flutter and my fingers clench into a fist.

"See you around, Aoife," she winked, pulling me away from the door and practically prancing out of it.

I stood there staring into space. What the fuck had just happened? I was in a dreamlike state as I left the lab, ignoring the bodies of students heading to their lockers or making their way home.

I walked to the locker rooms where all the cheerleaders were gone except Becky and Kei, who were talking and laughing loudly. Their voices died down when they saw me, and Becky smiled deviously at me.

"You!" she yelled, rushing up to me to wrap an arm around my shoulders, "Spill the beans, right now!"

"Everyone saw the way she pulled you out of here. Please tell me you made out in the Janitor's closet?" Kei squealed excitedly.

I could still feel the ghost of her lips on my inner wrist and I suddenly felt vile, like I'd betrayed my soulmate by letting someone else try and mark me there, where my soulmate's name was supposed to be. I felt sick and overwhelmed.

"I don't want to talk," I managed to say through the tightness in my throat, "Call me later."

I packed up my stuff and practically ran out of the school premises. Normally, I went home with Becky in her brother's car or I went with Kei because she had her own car but I didn't have the energy and I called a cab.

When I got home, I distractedly said hi to my mum already making dinner, kissed Niamh and Cathal on their foreheads before heading straight to my room.

It felt like my wrist was throbbing. I couldn't stop thinking about Jade's lips wrapped around the flesh of my inner right wrist, the feel of her pulling on the skin, oh my God it was fucking obscene, it made me hotter then hell. I knew I hadn't even gotten my name yet, for all I knew, Jade could be my soulmate, but it still felt like cheating somehow and I felt really dirty.

I groaned and fell onto my bed, slapping my face into my pillow, feeling hot and bothered and achy as I touched my wrist, replaying the feel of Jade's lips over and over again in my head.

Fuck, I really, fucking hated Jade Hall.

*

I waved when I spotted Becky and Kei sitting by the fountain in the middle of the mall, waiting for me. They waved back and got up from the wooden benches they'd been perched on.

"Hey!" I said when I finally made it up to them, giving them air kisses on both cheeks, "let's get this sorted, shall we?"

"Can we eat lunch first? I'm starving," Kei moaned already leading us towards the food court.

"You're always starving," Becky teased and Kei turned to flick her in the nose, making us laugh.

We went to the Burger King unit and found a table, settling down to eat. I could feel my heart thumping, just waiting for them to ask me about yesterday and what happened with Jade in the Physics Lab.

"Okay, guys, somehow, Kevin got my number," Becky began, and I visibly relaxed that the subject wasn't about me.

Kei waggled her eyebrows, her mouth stuffed with meat but that didn't stop her from blurting, "Oh my God, you guys are totally going to date now, aren't you?"

Even with her dark skin, we knew she was blushing as Becky grumbled, "Making out does not equal dating, Kei."

"So what happened, then?" I asked, taking a dainty bite out of my burger so as not to ruin my lipstick. I made sure to swallow before asking, "Did he ask you out, or?"

"No," Becky replied, playing around with her chips, "He just...kind of rambled on about stupid things on the phone before saying it was nice to talk to me and he'd call me later."

"Took him long enough!" Kei gasped, "My party's been over for more than a week now! Just how long does it take for a guy to grow a vagina?"

"Kei!" I gasped, laughing at her bluntness.

"What?" she giggled, "His balls are obviously fragile little things. A slap and his voice is going to go up a couple octaves. But a vagina, now there's a tough organ if I've ever seen one. Childbirth, can take a good pounding –"

"Jesus, Kei can you not?" Rebecca gasped, burying her face in her hands in mortification while I laughed at them both.

"And how about you?" Kei turned to me, raising one eyebrow sassily and making my heartbeat skip, "don't think we've forgotten about Jade dragging you to God knows where after practice yesterday."

"Mhm," Becky added, wagging her eyebrows, obviously glad the topic was no longer on her and Kevin, "What happened, Queen Bee? I thought Kei's party was a one-time thing," she stressed the last three words and despite myself, I couldn't help but blush guiltily.

"Fine. So we kissed some more. 'Hate sex is the best though'," I mocked, sending the girls laughing and I grinned, glad they were taking it lightly even though I could feel my wrist tingling at the ghost of the memory.

"Seriously, what are the two of you even doing?" Kei asked curiously, "Like, are you going to start dating? What about her soulmate? Did she say it was you?"

I felt my stomach roiling uncomfortably because those were the questions I'd asked myself a billion times over and over last night.

"No, we're not dating," I grumbled, "And people still date other people even when they've gotten their names. As long as they're not claimed, it's no big deal to some."

"Well, if it's casual I say go for it," Becky shrugged.

"You're just saying that because you want to date Kevin when neither of you have names yet," Kei teased lewdly, and I laughed while Becky flicked a chip in her direction.

"Come on girls, time's a-wasting," I said, standing up and picking up my milkshake and tray. The girls got up to follow me and throw the stuff in the bin before we headed off to the salon for what we came for.

*

On Monday, when I got to school, everyone was staring at me. I'd thought the weekend would make things calm down, but the rumour that Jade had taken me to the Physics lab to make out with me was the talk on everyone's lips.

"I'm surprised." "I thought Aoife wasn't into that sort of stuff, she doesn't seem to be interested in anyone far as I can tell." "Well everyone isn't exactly a lesbian like she is, now are they?" "Yeah, I guess she doesn't have a lot of options." "Do you think they're soulmates?" "Her and Jade? Are you kidding?"

At that last sarcastic statement, I deliberately blocked my ears, humming under my breath so I wouldn't hear what they were saying. God, look at them fucking discussing my business like it was their life. I prayed I didn't bump into Jade that morning as I made my way to my locker.

I said hi to the girls and we chatted a bit, the girls deliberately not talking about anything Jade and for that I was grateful. My day took a downer though because I had English, double period, with Jade.

Fuck my life.

I kept my head down when I got to the classroom, only looking up when Mr Carreg gave us some work to do while he lazed about in his chair like the ape that he was.

The class was silent, only the sounds of paper flicking and pens scribbling the noise in the room.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" Jade asked lazily. Her voice sounded so loud, disrupting the silence.

I couldn't help but glance back at her. She had both of her long pale legs crossed on her desk in front of her, not caring that everyone in the room could see the stark white boy shorts she wore underneath her short black skirt that said 'JUICY' in big, cartoony pink letters.

My hand clenched around my pen painfully.

Mr Carreg looked up and sneered at her through his glasses, "Oh, I don't know, can you?" he snarked.

She got up from her desk, smirking as she said, "Actually, yes, I can. Also colloquial irregularities occur frequently in any language and since you and the rest of our present company," she looked around the classroom, "understood my intended meaning, being particular about the distinctions between 'can' and 'may' is purely pedantic and arguably pretentious."

Mr Carreg stared at her, mouth agape like a fish.

"I'll be back in five," Jade said with a laugh before skipping out of the class like a dainty peacock.

She was smart. God, she was so fucking sexy and so goddamn smart.

I really, really hated her so much.

*

Really, I should've seen this coming.

"I can't – I don't do this," I whispered, desperate to somehow salvage the last bit of reserve I had left because I didn't know what the hell this was with Jade and it was terrifying. This was the third time she was pulling me off to kiss me and I was as confused as I was turned on.

She kept stroking the inside of my wrist with her thumb as she plundered my mouth and it was driving me nuts. My heart was thumping frantically, and I was unable to resist the press of soft lips against mine, the way she kissed me like I was a buffet and she was fucking starved.

Jade pulled back to look at me, a slow smile spreading across her lips which only made the dimples in her cheeks more pronounced than ever, her brown eyes uncharacteristically bright from the sunlight hitting her face through the slits in the wall of the Janitor's closet.

"You can't or you don't?" she teased huskily, lifting a finger up to trace my lips, still wet from her kisses, my lipstick probably gone. "Make up your mind, princess."

I blushed furiously, turning away from her but she cupped my jaw and forced my gaze back to hers.

"It's just a bit of fun," she teased, "what's the harm?"

Her lips covered mine again and I literally turned to mush.

I really, really hated Jade Hall.

*

"It's just a bit of fun," I parroted Jade's words back to Becky and Kei when they refused to stop pestering me.

Becky stared at me incredulously. "Just a bit of fun? Honey, let me tell you a thing."

I burst out laughing and Kei was giggling as well, while Becky tried really hard to look affronted. The small smile on her lips wasn't really helping.

"Seriously guys, there's no need to worry. It's just...it's nothing," I said with a casual shrug, desperately ignoring the tiny part of me that wanted it to be more.

*

Friday in the Physics lab after cheerleading.

That had become me and Jade's secret rendezvous location. Even though it wasn't really secret because the entire school knew. But that was what happened every single Friday since the first one. I was addicted to her like a man on crack. When we weren't making out in the lab, she sometimes pulled me at random times to kiss me for a few minutes in the Janitor's closet or she'd wink and wave at me during lunch which made me blush and in turn made Kei and Becky squeal in delight.

But I still told myself that I hated her.

I hated her fucking guts.

*

"Seriously, where are we going?" Jade asked in a bored fashion, staring out of the window of my mum's Mercedes.

My heart was a painful throb in my chest. "Patience is the key here, Jade."

"Don't get cheeky with me," she teased, turning to look at me which made me blush harder.

When we got to the restaurant, I ignored the look she was giving me, swallowing hard and wiping my sweaty palms on my dress. We both put our jackets on. It was getting chilly because it was late October, the weather preparing for the winter months. I linked my arm through Jade's elbow, feeling like I was going to vomit as I led her to the doors.

"Table for two under Cullen, please," I croaked at the guy by the door, coughing to clear my throat.

The man looked up with a smile when he found the reservation in the register.

"Right this way, ma'am."

He led us to a circular table by the windows and Jade rushed to pull out my chair for me and I felt lightheaded, smiling up at her as I took my seat before she took hers.

The man helped us with our jackets, taking them off us as he said, "I'll let you settle in and I'll be back in say, five, ten minutes for your drinks?"

"That would be wonderful, thank you," I responded, picking up a menu and practically boring a hole into it with how hard I was staring. I could feel Jade looking at me and it made sweat prickle at the back of my neck. Oh fuck, who the hell said this was a good idea? I was going to kill Rebecca and Kei for roping me into this.

"Aoife," Jade said in her sultry voice, making my toes curl tightly in my boots.

"Mm?" I asked distractedly, focusing even harder on my menu.

"Is this a date?" she teased, and I blushed to the roots of my hair.

"What? Of course not! Don't be ridiculous!" I said, my voice high-pitched with frantic denial.

She laughed softly, the sound like bells. "Whatever you say, beautiful."

I blushed even harder.

Dinner was nice. Really nice. For the past two months, all Jade and I have done is make out in the Physics Lab and the Janitor's closet. From what I knew, Jade wasn't spontaneously kissing anyone else, and neither was I, so I thought maybe we could take things a bit further.

I wanted her. I hated it, but I wanted her. God, I wanted her so badly. Despite the fact that she hadn't even hinted at whose name could be on her wrist – be it mine or someone else's – and it was driving me senseless; despite this, I still wanted her.

I wanted her and I couldn't help it. My birthday was in a month's time. What if I got my name and it wasn't hers? It made my heart wrench painfully underneath my ribcage at the thought. I didn't want to waste this entire month just kissing her when I wanted so much more. And tonight was my way of showing her that I wanted more.

I looked up at her as she ate, her gaze lazily sweeping over the restaurant. Her hair was pinned to her scalp messily, making stray curls frame around her face and dust the nape of her neck. Her pale face was livened up by the high blush on her cheeks and her eyes looked like molten honey in the dimmed lights of the room.

She was wearing a nice loose-fitting green dress that stopped at her knees, her feet swallowed by ankle boots.

She was so perfect.

She turned and caught me staring, and I blushed so hard it made my cheeks burn yet I couldn't tear my gaze away.

She smiled gently and reached over the table to take my right hand, her thumb rubbing over my inner wrist and I shivered violently at the action. We might've been fooling around for the past two months, but ever since that first time in the Physics lab, we'd subconsciously been avoiding touching our soul wrists. She did it on some rare occasions because she knew just how much it drove me senseless and she was doing it now and it had to mean something, it just had to.

When we finally finished dinner, I drove her back to mine, almost vibrating out of my seat with nervousness.

After a long silence I couldn't stand it anymore.

"How was – did you – was that okay?" I asked timidly, hating how small my voice was.

She laughed, the sound soft and polite, and reached over to give my thigh a gentle squeeze. "I loved it, Aoife. It was really nice."

I shivered, huffing out a breath, relaxing into my seat.

When I entered the house, my family was conveniently missing, and I blushed at that, knowing that they knew I was taking Jade out to dinner and they probably guessed I might be bringing her back home.

We kicked off our shoes by the front door and then I led her to my room.

"Do you want something –" I began nervously, my voice cutting off on a moan when Jade was suddenly kissing me.

She pulled away with a gentle smack of our lips, loud in the silence of my room.

"Aoife. What suddenly brought this on?" she asked, her eyes incredibly warm.

I swallowed. "I'm tired of just making out all the time. I wanted something more, didn't you?" I felt like I'd just ripped my chest open. I've never felt so vulnerable.

"Aoife," she whispered, and the way she said my name sounded like a thousand promises, making warmth pool in my tummy and my chest, "You're honestly going to be the death of me."

She joined our lips in a gentle kiss, and I wrapped my hands around her neck, kissing her back. She gently pushed me towards the bed, and I landed on it on my back while she straddled my thighs, still kissing me. My heart was pounding erratically in my chest. We'd never gone farther than kissing and –

"Oh!" I gasped, arching my back a little when her hands moved down to cup my breasts.

"God, Aoife you're so sexy," she whispered, and then her hands left my chest, moving up across my shoulders and then down to my arms before her fingers were wrapping gently around both my wrists.

I couldn't breathe.

"Is this – is this okay?" This was the first time she'd ever sounded truly nervous, and for some reason, it made the warmth in my chest swell. I licked my lips and nodded.

"Oh God," I whispered when she lifted my right hand up towards her lips, "Oh God. Fuck," I moaned loudly when she kissed my inner wrist, mapping the sensitive skin with her lips and I could feel my heart pounding on every inch of my body.

"Aoife," she whispered against the skin, making sure our gazes were locked, before she parted her lips and sucked.

I expected it but it was still a shock to my system. My entire body arched off the bed, taut with indescribable pleasure.

"Jade," I gasped, "Jade."

She didn't stop and it was driving me senseless. I began to tremble and writhe beneath her, my entire body thrumming with pleasure when she only pulled harder at the skin. My free hand flew up to yank at her hair because it was becoming too much. Hair pins popped out of place, falling into my sheets and sending Jade's hair falling down over her face and neck like a dark wavy halo. Oh God, what was happening? I felt like I was about to – oh God –

"Jade," I gasped, my eyes wide with panic, my thighs shifting and then clenching together, "Jade, I'm – I'm –"

She pulled so hard on my flesh it actually hurt and that feeling that had been building in me burst free and I screamed her name, arching off the bed, my entire body shaking violently. It felt like I'd been zapped by lightening.

I sank into the sheets with a sigh when the feeling seemed to slowly fade and settle into my bones, making me feel sleepy and content.

"Jesus Christ," Jade was whispering and I opened my eyes half-lidded to look at her, "Jesus fuck, Aoife, did you just –?"

I blushed furiously because, yes, I did just.

"Fucking hell," she whispered, leaning down to kiss me hard and I wanted to return the favour, reaching desperately for her own cuffed wrist, rubbing my thumb hard against the inner flesh where her name was.

Her reaction was almost violent. Her hips slammed down against mine and she cried out hoarsely against my lips.

"Don't stop," she whispered, "don't stop."

I yanked her by the hair to crush our lips together as I rubbed my thumb in harsh circles against the name on her wrist through the thick velvet of her cuff, suddenly aching that she would take the cuff off and show me, because right now, I was sure it was my name on her wrist. I could feel it down to my bones.

She was mine. I was hers.

Her moans got really high-pitched as she got close, and when she finally tumbled off the edge, I'd never seen anything so fucking lovely in my entire life.

She collapsed against my chest, breathing heavily against my throat where her face was buried.

"Good Lord," she whispered, "Holy wow."

I laughed giddily, wrapping my arms around her waist. I wanted to ask so badly if she could show me the name, but if she hadn't shown me in the past two months, maybe she wasn't ready? Maybe, maybe she was waiting for me to get mine, so we could do it together.

The thought made my stomach clench deliciously.

"My birthday's in a month," I whispered.

"Mm," she replied lazily.

I suddenly felt extremely nervous, my heart pounding in my chest. "So, it's my eighteenth. I'm going to get my name then."

I felt her stiffen on top of me, and it made panic begin to swell underneath my ribcage.

"Jade?"

She rolled off my body and got up from the bed, and I could feel the panic increasing as I sat up to watch her helplessly.

"Uhm, this was nice," she said, refusing to look at me, running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to tame the wavy locks, "I guess, I'll see you on Monday, then? Goodnight."

And then she was disappearing out of my room.

I jumped a little when the front door slammed behind her hasty exit.

I clutched at the aching hollowness behind my ribs, clenching my eyes shut and forcing myself not to cry.

*

Monday morning, Jade completely ignored me when I walked into the hallways for school.

Normally, she'd do something embarrassing, like wink or walk right up to me to brush a teasing kiss on my lips before disappearing, but today, she acted like I didn't even exist.

"Did something happen?" Kei asked, noticing the interaction, or rather, the lack thereof.

"Hm?" I asked, faking a smile as I turned to look at her, pretending I didn't know what she was talking about. Becky was at Kevin's locker and they were talking. They'd started dating a few weeks ago, and if I knew anything, it was the fact that Kevin and Becky were so into each other it was actually kind of disgusting.

The googly eyes and holding hands and cheesy kisses were just annoying now.

"Between you and Jade," Kei continued, and I wanted to smack her in the face for not noticing my bad mood even though I was hiding said mood tightly under a blank expression.

"Nothing happened," I said through gritted teeth, "We're fine."

"So, how was your date?" Becky said brightly as she approached, apparently done with her early morning sappiness with Kevin. She hadn't noticed the way Jade had blatantly ignored me, which was why she was brimming with obvious excitement as she stood next to me.

"Nothing happened!" I snapped, irritated with her happiness, "fuck off."

I made my way to English class and promptly ignored where Jade sat, focusing instead on my text book. Throughout class, she didn't make a single sound, which was unlike her because she loved to antagonise Mr Carreg much to the amusement of the class; but now she was as silent as a ghost.

When lunch hit, I couldn't take it anymore.

It was my turn to grab her wrist and pull her to the Janitor's closet – which was occupied, the people inside squeaking as I hissed, "Next time block the freaking door!" – before I pulled her to the Chemistry lab, which was empty.

"Okay, what's your problem?" I growled after letting go of her wrist.

She glared at me. "I don't have a problem. Can I leave?"

"No. Not until you tell me what I did wrong," my shoulders suddenly deflated, "What did I do? Was I going too fast? I'm sorry." Fuck, fuck, no, that wasn't what I was supposed to say, Aoife you fucking dumbass.

My words made her deflate too, and she suddenly looked very tired. I didn't like that expression. It gave me a sense of impending doom.

"I'm sorry, too," she said, "And I really don't want to talk about it. Can I go now?"

"Fine. Whatever. Leave."

She sidled past me and out of the door and I took a couple seconds to get myself back together, breathing harshly through my lips. I was fine. I was okay. This was something small. Every relationship went through this, right? We just needed time to work things out.

Except I wasn't really sure if this was ever a relationship in the first place.

*

"Sweetheart?" my mum called, knocking on my bedroom door.

I moaned like a dying animal in response, making her chuckle as she opened the door a few inches, "You've got a friend here," she said with a twinkle in her eye.

I felt my heart skip a beat in my chest. "Tell her I'm dead."

My mother laughed and opened the door wider, letting Jade come through.

I turned back to bury my face in the pillow, my mum disappearing and of course, leaving the door open. Jade came in and I felt her weight as she took a seat on my bed by my feet.

"When you didn't show up in school today, I thought it was because of – you know, because we didn't talk yesterday."

I groaned into the pillow, not in the mood. "What do you want?"

"Is it that bad?" she asked in amusement, and I froze before sitting up to look at her.

"Oh God," I said in mortification before yelling, "MUM! WHAT THE HELL?"

My mother was instantly rushing up the stairs, glasses perched on her nose and papers in her hands. She'd been working but she looked alarmed, glancing from me to Jade and then back to me. "Sweetie, are you alright?"

"You told her?" I asked, exaggerating my tone of betrayal.

She laughed and waved her hand at me, "Of course I told her. She asked what was wrong."

"And you just told her? Ugh – go away."

My mother laughed all the way down the stairs, and I sobbed in pain at the sudden cramp that just hit me from hell, tears building up behind my eyelids. I collapsed back on the bed, curling around my hot water bottle.

Jade was silent for a while before she got up and left the room. And I didn't know why, but the action made me start crying. Ugh, stupid fucking periods driving my emotions all over the place. I sobbed into the pillow as more cramps hit me and I rocked and rolled on the bed, asking God why he didn't love me anymore.

Jade showed up again about twenty minutes later with a bowl of soup in her hands and some DVDs. The sight of her being so domestic made me cry even harder, and she laughed at me which made me cry even more.

"Shut up, shut up," I sobbed, clutching the water bottle to my tummy as I lay on my back and stared at the ceiling.

"Something hot in your tummy should relieve the pain a bit," she said to me, helping me sit up before placing the hot bowl in my hands. "Sip on that, I'll be right back."

I looked at the DVDs, noticing it was just a few from all my favourites. Harry Potter, Mean Girls, the Godfather, and Easy A. I was surprised she remembered because the time I'd been telling her about my interests, she'd told me I talked too much and cut me off with a kiss and we ended up making out, our talking forgotten.

I slurped the soup and the heat did make me feel a bit better, made the pain more bearable.

Jade returned to the room with a cup of steaming ginger tea and placed it by the bed.

"Which one?" she asked excitedly, pointing at the DVDs.

"Easy A," I replied croakily and she nodded, skipping over to the DVD player in my room. She switched on the TV and fixed it up before she was cuddling up to me in the bed and I was so confused because just two days ago she'd been hightailing out of my room like I was a poisonous snake after our date and after ignoring me all day yesterday, she's here. Cuddling me.

I ignored the thought though, afraid that if I mentioned it she'd disappear and I really didn't want to be alone. Becky and Kei knew how bad my period got and they'd already sent me messages to feel better soon. I didn't like having them over because they were awkward and everything they seemed to do just pissed me off.

It was different with Jade.

I relaxed against her side, forgetting about the pain as I finished my soup and then began sipping on the tea. The movie had maybe twenty or thirty minutes left when I began to feel drowsy. The mug and bowl were empty and my hot water bottle had gone cold.

Jade seemed to notice because she picked it up.

"I'll be right back," she whispered, kissing my forehead before disappearing down the stairs.

I smiled and sank down into the pillows.

I didn't realize I'd fallen asleep until she returned, gently lifting me up so she could place the hot water bottle, which was hot again, against my lower belly. She brushed my hair from my face and kissed my forehead again before probably leaving the room. I wasn't sure because I'd fallen back asleep.

I dreamt of Jade removing her cuff and baring her wrist to me, my name etched onto her skin in my messy handwriting while she smiled at me like I was the entire world.

*

As my birthday drew closer, Jade's behaviour suddenly turned erratic. One second, she's winking at me and kissing me, and the next, she's acting like I don't exist. Sometimes she became a fucking asshole, making me look like a love-struck idiot in the midst of everyone while she sneered down at me like I was chewing gum stuck under her shoe.

"I don't know about you, but I don't like how she's treating you," Becky said matter-of-factly when she noticed, "I want to smack her in the back of the head."

"Tell me about it," Kei replied, eyebrows scrunched up in an angry scowl.

"She's just going through a rough time," I lied, defending her, "I'm sure she'll be okay soon."

I didn't understand why she was acting this way. Each time I tried to talk to her, she'd either prevent that from happening by kissing me or walking out on me and I was honestly tired of it.

If she wanted to end things with me, why didn't she just come straight and do it instead of beating around the fucking bush?

*

It was my birthday.

Because it was Wednesday and we had school tomorrow, my parents had refused to throw a party so I was just having dinner with my closest friends and some of the neighbours. Some girls from the cheerleading team, guys in my class, and some of my cousins had come over. Everyone was dressed in white which was the theme for the night, and my mum and dad had really slaved over the stove, cooking together and refusing to let me help because I was the celebrant.

They'd done a wonderful job. It was truly a beautiful night.

Jade hadn't come, despite my explicit invitation.

It was supposed to be the best night of my life, especially when mum and dad gave me the most beautiful velvet black cuff covered in lace embroidery for my birthday in anticipation of my name. I was supposed to be ecstatic.

But I kept staring at the empty seat on the table where Jade was meant to be and couldn't help but feel miserable.

*

I didn't see Jade the next morning and even though everyone's gazes were instantly diverting down to my wrist the minute I appeared on school grounds, my wrists were still bare because I hadn't gotten my name yet. It was supposed to come any time seven days before the eighteenth birthday or seven days after. I wasn't worried. I knew it was going to come whenever.

I talked a bit with Kei and Rebecca before I made my way to my History class. I didn't have that class with Jade and for that I was grateful. I wasn't sure I was ready to see her just yet.

But the next two periods were gym and that equalled cheerleading. I was definitely going to see her then and as the time drew nearer, my breath grew shorter.

When the bell shrilled for the end of the period, I slowly, dreadfully made my way towards the girls' locker rooms. I was just going past the Physics lab when I froze, spotting two shadows inside.

I didn't know what made me stop.

Jade turned around when she heard the door open and saw me standing there, probably looking as pale as a ghost.

I retained control of my limbs and practically ran to the locker room, shoving my bag in my locker and changing into my sneakers, quickly pulling my hair into a ponytail and then running into the indoor gym. Because of how cold it was getting outside, being late November and all, we'd stopped using the field to practice.

I couldn't get that image out of my head. It had been one of the girls from the Spartans. She'd been staring at Jade with her mouth a surprised 'o' as Jade's lips pressed into the skin inside her left wrist.

My stomach roiled and I swallowed repeatedly to keep myself from throwing up.

I was jogging around the gym, ignoring the other girls stretching and laughing while Coach Mann was reading something with utmost concentration on her clipboard. I didn't even need to look when I felt Jade's presence jogging beside me.

"We were never exclusive you know," she said to me, sending a sharp pain knifing right through my chest.

I laughed bitterly and then I stopped running, turning to face her.

"Just tell me," I said passionately, "Just tell me it's not my name on your wrist. Tell me right now because –"

Her expression hardened and her hands curled into fists. "It's not your name!" she spat and I stumbled backwards at the vehemence of her tone. "What did you think?" she added cruelly, her voice high, "That you were going to have your birthday and maybe, just maybe if you loved me hard enough your name would just magically appear on my wrist? Well I'm sorry to burst your bubble but it doesn't work that way, princess."

My lower lip wobbled. "I hate you," I whispered, before I turned and ran away as fast as my legs could take me.

"I don't feel well, can I go home?" I asked Coach Mann, unable to look at her or at anyone else. I could feel Becky and Kei staring at me in concern but I ignored their concern. I just wanted to go home.

Coach eyed me critically for a few seconds, but I must've really looked pitiful because she nodded. "Make sure you put a note in the reception, Missy," she dismissed me, and I was off.

I got my things and signed out in the reception, stating I was sick before heading home. I didn't call a cab; I walked the entire forty minute journey and by the time I got home, I was too exhausted to think, falling into a deep sleep.

My parents were at work, Niamh was probably still in school, and Cathal must've been at the nursery.

My mum got back home just a few minutes before one o'clock, the sound of Cathal laughing and giggling filling up the silence in the house. I heard Niamh running up the stairs to her room but she paused when she noticed my room door open. She frowned and walked into the room, her eyebrows raising in surprise when she spotted me before she was squealing and rushing to hug me.

"You're home early!" she grinned and I smiled fondly back at her.

"Yup! How was school today?" I asked, forcing some cheer into my tone.

She immediately excitedly launched into a tale while I nodded enthusiastically.

"Niamh? Sweetheart, who are you talking to?" my mother called for downstairs.

"Mum!" Niamh yelled, getting up from my bed and running to the door.

"Be careful!" I yelled just as she called out, "Aoife's home!" before disappearing to her room presumably to change from her uniform.

My mum made it to my room a minute later, holding Cathal in her arms. He was drooling all over his shirt while he played with a leg torn off of one of Niamh's dolls.

"Honey, school doesn't end for another hour, what are you doing home?" she asked in concern, dropping the six month old in a sitting position on the floor. Her hands hovered until she was sure he wasn't going to fall over before she was making her way to my bed and pushing my hair back from my face in a motherly gesture. "Are you okay, Aoife?"

I swallowed thickly. "I'm not ready to talk about it."

"Aw, sweetie," she said softly and pulled me up from the bed to hug me. I hugged her back tightly, burying my face in her throat and inhaling the scent of her tea-tree shampoo. "Do you need to take your mind off it or shall I leave you alone?"

"Former."

"Good then," she beamed, "Because I've got shitloads to do from the office so you can help by starting dinner. Make something for Niamh and put Cathal's bottle in some hot water to warm it up. Is that okay?"

I got up from the bed, "Yup, I can manage that."

"Okay, thank you. I'll be in the sitting room. If you're ready to talk, I'm here, okay?"

"I know," I whispered, trying not to cry. I refused to look at her as I left the room because I knew if I saw her concerned, compassionate gaze, I would lose what strength I had left that was barely keeping me together and completely break apart.

I made something for Niamh to eat, heated up Cathal's bottle and fed him before I started on dinner. I finished just around the time my dad got home at around five and my mum thankfully didn't mention my coming home early to him. My dad wasn't as understanding as my mum and he'd probably pound me with questions until I broke down, so I was glad that she didn't say anything.

Dinner was a quick affair. I took care of the dishes and helped Niamh do her homework before I headed straight to my room. I put on some music at the loudest volume and sang loudly and horribly along with Hurts as I showered, the music helping to distract me from the danger of showers. Showers were horrible – it was in showers that all those thoughts seemed to uncontrollably burst free, which was why I was currently screaming and singing along to the music like a banshee to keep my mind clear.

I came out wrapped in a towel in time to hear someone pounding on my room door. I turned the music down and I heard my dad yell through the door, "And it better stay down!" before I heard him make his way back down the stairs.

I laughed a little and changed into my jammies, switching my TV on and putting in The Internship. I needed some laughs tonight.

*

It was about two a.m. when it happened. I first felt an incredible heat in my wrist that woke me up. I froze, staring at my right wrist, lying limply in the pillow next to my head, not even daring to breathe. The heat seemed to spread from that spot outwards and into my body.

And then I felt it, like someone was pressing a pen to my skin and writing, firm and sure. It was exhilarating and for a second it felt amazing, sparks lighting up in my body and I felt like screaming with happiness.

Then the euphoric feeling suddenly crashed, and I felt my chest tighten painfully underneath my ribcage. Because, for some reason, without even looking at my wrist, I knew.

I knew just whose name was going to be on my wrist. This was it. This was supposed to be the highlight of my life. So why on earth did it feel like I was dying?

When the feeling of the pen stopped, another heat spread through my entire body followed by a feeling of love, belonging, and contentment. I sank into the pillows and turned my wrist to face me.

I stared at the name designing my wrist, the name of my soulmate. The person who completed me mentally, physically, and emotionally. I stared at the name until my vision blurred and I finally broke down crying because even though my wrist read Jade Hall, with a tiny heart above the last 'L', my soulmate's wrist didn't read Aoife Cullen.

*

The next morning, when my mother spotted my blotchy face from my silent crying last night, she immediately dropped her cup of coffee on the counter and rushed up to me, cooing, "Oh honey," in a completely sympathetic voice that took everything in me to keep from crying. Again.

I let her hug me for a second before pulling away and lifting my wrist up to show her that I was wearing my cuff.

"Oh, oh! Sean! SEAN!" my mum bellowed, making me laugh and Cathal burst out crying from his baby seat on the dining table. She rushed to pick him up as my dad came bounding down the stairs.

"What is it, woman?"

"Look! Look!" she said excitedly, nodding towards my cuff while she bounced Cathal almost violently on her hip to stop his soft whimpering.

His eyes grew comically wide. "Oh my God! This is amazing! We're going to celebrate tonight! Oh lord, I can't wait to tell all my buddies about this! Is it a girl?"

"Of course it's a girl, don't be ridiculous darling," my mother scolded teasingly, and I laughed while my father blushed.

"What do you think?" my dad was asking me excitedly, "Do you think she'll be pretty?"

"Sean!" my mother gasped, affronted, while I laughed even harder.

"Yes, dad," I replied, "She's going to be perfect, after all, she was made just for me."

"Aw, look at her being all mushy and shit, Iona, I can't take it."

We all burst out laughing.

"Oh, that's it. I'm making a big breakfast!" my dad gasped enthusiastically, "Iona put some music on! This is great!"

My mum giggled and made her way to the sitting room to put the music on.

"I'm going to help Niamh get ready, yeah?" I called to my mum, heading towards the stairs.

"Okay, sweetie."

I rushed up the stairs to my sister's room, knocking on her door before bounding in and jumping on top of her bed. My parents' excitement had filtered through to me and I was feeling giddy.

"Noooo. I don't wanna go to school today," Niamh whined sleepily, turning her face into her pillow and making me laugh at her adorable-ness, her short strawberry blonde curls all over the place.

"Too bad you have no choice!" I laughed, getting up and opening her curtains. She moaned in agony and I gave her a few seconds before yanking the covers off her tiny body.

"Uhhhh, Aoife!" she whined, curling into a ball and making me laugh harder.

"Hey, hey, Niamh, look!"

She grunted and didn't move.

"Come on, Nee, look, look!"

"What?" she snapped before turning to look at me, her eyes growing wide when she saw my cuff, "Oh my God, Aoife!" she gasped, now wide awake as she sprang off her bed and rushed to give me a hug around my hips, gosh, she was a little small for her age, before bouncing excitedly on the spot, "Can I see? Can I, please, can I?"

I laughed, "You know only my soulmate is meant to see it, baby cakes."

She pouted, "But Miss Edwin says we can show our family."

"Only if and when I want to," I replied, ruffling her hair, "Now go take a shower. If you're done in good time, maybe I'll show you."

"Maybe?" she groaned and I laughed, nudging her in the direction of her bathroom.

"Cheeky devil. Make sure you scrub every nook and cranny."

"Mm!" she nodded enthusiastically before disappearing into her bathroom.

I smiled and thanked God silently for my family, because the day didn't look so gloomy anymore.

*

"Becky, you're going to burn a hole through her wrist if you keep staring like that," Kei mumbled, even though the Japanese girl was also staring.

I laughed and lifted my hand up, laughing even harder when their gazes followed like my cuff was an eye-magnet. The other sirens on the table were trying not to stare as well, and I felt my whole body heating up with a blush at the attention.

"Tell us again how you got it," one girl at the end of the table gushed, and I blushed furiously.

"Well..." I began teasingly, making them all groan and start banging on the table.

"Okay, okay!" I gasped, laughing, "It happened at around two in the morning. It was just this sort of heat that woke me up. Like, it wasn't bad. It was pleasant."

"Pleasant," Kei repeated, waggling her eyebrows lewdly and I smacked her in the arm.

"And then – you all know this bit – it felt like someone was writing on my wrist," I said, "And I was filled with so much happiness I felt like I could burst. And when I looked at her name, I actually burst out crying."

Everyone on the table squealed.

"It's so romantic!" one girl gushed, "You got your name on Christmas first!"

Everyone burst out laughing, and one of the guys pointed out when the girl looked confused, "Christmas first? Don't you mean December first?" he corrected, making everyone laugh again and the girl go red with mortification.

"You know what I meant!" she huffed, making us laugh harder.

Some people started gushing 'oh it's just so romantic!' and 'I hope my soulmate cries when they see my name on their wrist!' and I shook my head silently to myself because they didn't know that it hadn't been happy tears I'd shed.

After my dad had stuffed us full of eggs, bacon, sausages, toast, and juice this morning, there was no way I could be sad when I felt like a stuffed animal. My mum dropped me off at school with promises for the family to go get some greasy food and watch a movie at the cinema, all to celebrate me getting my name, and then we were going to go to the mall tomorrow since it was a Saturday and they pretty much really exaggerated the entire thing and I wasn't even mad because it made me so damn happy.

I was even able to completely ignore that Jade existed with the way everyone was giving me attention and cooing over how pretty my cuff was, and they bet my soulmate's name was just as pretty and it made me feel completely overwhelmed, but in a good way.

The day seemed to go by in a pleasing blur, I didn't have any classes with Jade today, and that made everything easier and even when we got to last period, which was Gym a.k.a. cheerleading, I was still in a relatively happy mood, surrounded by the girls of both teams because of my cuff.

Everyone was still talking about it and at first it was nice, but now I was beginning to feel shy and uncomfortable. Ugh, I suddenly hated that I was the first person to get her name in our year. We only had about two weeks left before first term was over, and I was itching for it. I wanted Christmas and snow and the holiday.

I made my way to the indoor gym, training with the girls, and I found that it was ridiculously easy to ignore Jade but then that was only because she wasn't in the gym.

I hated that the first thing I felt was worry and for the rest of the session, I was anxious to find out if she was okay.

When the session finally ended and we made our way to the locker rooms, Jade was there, resting against my locker and staring at me. I stopped breathing and my heartbeat went haywire. It was like I was seeing her for the first time, suddenly noticing the lustrous quality of her wavy dark hair, her honey brown eyes so intense, and God, I didn't think I ever liked how angular her jaw was, but now I did, I loved every inch of her fucking face.

Oh God.

She walked up to me and I didn't notice the sudden silence in the gym when she grabbed my wrist and yanked me out of the room.

It was Friday. I felt a bit nostalgic as we entered the Physics lab but then I felt like I was doused in cold water when the memory of Jade kissing someone else's wrist came to mind and I couldn't help blurting, "So, is she your soulmate then?" my voice high, bitter, jealous and angry.

She rolled her eyes, "Oh don't be a baby," before walking up to me, grabbing my face in her palms and leaning forward to kiss me.

I jumped out of her grasp before our lips could touch, "What the fuck are you doing?" I yelled hysterically, "Oh my God, you are so confusing! Yesterday you told me specifically that we weren't exclusive and it wasn't my name on your wrist –"

"So what?" she snapped, crossing her arms, "Just because you've got a fancy new cuff now doesn't mean we should stop fooling around."

Something cold was settling in my chest as Jade referred to all our times together as just 'fooling around.'

I seethed, "Well, I'm done fooling around. So, fuck you."

I made to walk past her but she grabbed my arm, her fingers curling painfully tight right around my cuff, fingers digging hard into the name.

The sound that left me was quite frankly, embarrassing, like a mouse squeaking in fright and I felt my knees wobble as she stepped up to me, pressing her thumb against the inside of my wrist as she whispered in a cruel tone, "I wonder if she's going to kiss the red off your lips like I do. Or if she can make you come just by sucking, right here." She pressed her thumb down harder and a dying sob escaped from my lips.

"Stop," I begged softly, feeling tears build behind my eyes.

"Do you think she'll be happy, Aoife?" she asked with a sickly sweet smile and those dimples I once loved were now mocking me, "Do you think she'd like the fact that good girl Aoife was all over the new girl the minute she dropped her towel?"

I bit my lower lip and just stood there, crying and feeling humiliated.

She dropped my hand and took a step back. I didn't look at her face. She stood there for a second and then huffed before leaving the room, slamming the door behind her.

I winced and just stood there, sobbing quietly as my world fell apart around me.

That was how Becky and Kei found me a few minutes later.

"Oh my God, that bitch!" Kei gasped when she saw me sitting on the floor in the corner of the room, sobbing into my knees.

"What the hell did she do?" Rebecca asked furiously, flinging her bag at a random table before squatting beside me, Kei following suit.

"I-It's her," I stuttered through my tears, looking up at them, "I-It's her."

"What's her?" Becky asked gently just as Kei paled.

"Wait. Hold up. It's not what I'm thinking, is it?" she asked, her voice incredibly tiny.

I nodded almost frantically, wiping the snot off my nose. "It is. It's her but she doesn't have my name on her wrist and this is just so fucked because how the fuck is that even possible –"

"Whoa, hold up, are we talking about Jade?" Becky asked with wide eyes, "You have her name?"

I nodded again, shivering on a silent sob.

"How do you know she doesn't have yours?" Kei asked worriedly, glancing up at Becky as if for help.

"She told me, very explicitly that it wasn't me, yesterday," I said brokenly, distractedly running my thumb over where the name was through my cuff. It was hurting a bit from how hard Jade had squeezed it.

"Maybe it's a different Jade Hall?" Becky offered weakly, "She honestly can't be the only Jade Hall in the entire universe."

"Yeah!" Kei added overly enthusiastic, "that's true! There have been cases like that as well, where some people meet the person with their name but the person has someone else's name and it just turns out that the person was just a namesake. You're alright, Aoife. You don't need to cry over that bitch."

"Yup," Becky said with a smile as they both helped me up, "You're totally fine. Your Jade Hall is out there waiting for you at this moment."

And that was the worst part of it all. I didn't want any other Jade Hall.

I was fucking pathetic.

*

The next two weeks before the term was going to end were horrible. I felt horribly sick even though my body was completely healthy. I suffered from terrible headaches and fatigue and I was just so fucking tired of the world. I literally felt like I was dying or like someone had just severed all the veins and arteries leading to my heart, leaving my chest feeling hollow and cold.

It wasn't supposed to hurt this much. God, why the fuck did it hurt so much?

Meanwhile, Jade had made it her sole mission to woo and kiss and make out with nearly every girl and guy in our year, earning a reputation as the days rolled by. She was never seen with the same person twice and she was seen with at least one person a day and I was just so sick and tired, I just wanted the term to be over already, I didn't want to see her fucking face ever again.

Some people looked at me with pity because I was so obviously not taking my 'separation' with Jade well, but Becky and Kei kept lying and saying that one of my cousins died, that's why I looked like a ghost.

Some people didn't believe it. I heard the whispers, of Jade Hall dumping Aoife Cullen so brutally the Queen Bee wasn't the same again.

And wasn't that the truth.

*

"Aoife Cullen, you get upstairs and put on that sweater or I swear to God!"

I groaned and ran upstairs to put the stupid ugly Christmas sweater on, gagging at the red and green and the mash of reindeer and penguins and Santa Claus heads that designed the hideous garment. My phone began to ring and I dived for it, under my pillow, smiling at the caller ID.

"Yo!"

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Becky yelled into the phone and I laughed, pulling the phone slightly away from my ear.

"Christ, Becky, I'm not ready to go deaf just yet."

She giggled, "Kevin, say Merry Christmas to Queen Bee!"

I heard Kevin's voice in the background and I grinned, "Merry Christmas to you too!"

"So what's up? How's the holiday? Oh em gee, don't forget to send me a selfie of you in your Christmas sweater this year!"

"I fucking hate you," I laughed while Rebecca giggled hysterically.

"You love me! Have you spoken to Kei, yet? We should meet up this weekend and go to the mall. Oh and guess what? I'm pretty sure Kei got me an ugly Christmas sweater for a present and I got one for her as well!"

I chortled. "Oh my God, are you serious?"

"Absolutely! And we're all going to wear them when we go to the mall! No excuses!"

"Whatever you say," I laughed.

"Oh, by the way, did you hear? Jade was caught spray painting the headstones in the cemetery a few days ago, can you believe that?"

I clenched my eyes shut, hating the way my heart stuttered at the sound of her name. We've been on holiday for two weeks now and I haven't seen Jade since then.

"Whoa, are you serious?" I asked, trying to act like talking about her wasn't ripping me apart inside.

"Yup. She got fined and everything and now, I heard she's moving again."

"Is she now? Good riddance."

"My words exactly!"

We both laughed, my laugh coming out forced but oblivious Becky didn't notice.

"Well, I'll let Kei call you now. And remember, this weekend, ugly sweaters, no backing out and no complaining."

"Aye aye, captain."

"Oh, fuck you!" she laughed, "have a good night! Bye!"

"Bye."

I ended the call and made my way back downstairs, donned in my sweater, phone in my pocket.

"About time," my mother said. Dad was standing by the tree with Cathal balanced on his hip, Niamh was standing by his right while my mum was setting up the camera. "Go on and stand beside Niamh, I'll join you when the timer is on."

I stood beside my dad, grinning at Cathal who began to laugh at me, mouthing and mumbling gibberish, his hands occupied with the star that was supposed to go on the Christmas tree. When we'd tried to take the ornament away from him, he'd screamed so loud we just gave it back, saying it wasn't worth the trouble.

My entire family was here and after this, we were going to have dinner and sing carols and watch Christmas themed movies all night long. Then we'd be up early in the morning to open our presents and then spend the day out doing God knows what. Last year it was indoor roller derby, and this year, my dad wanted us to go ice-skating.

All in all, everything was looking pretty fantastic.

But I still – God, I fucking hated this – I still fucking missed her. So fucking much.

"Say Merry Christmas!" my mum grinned, rushing to stand on my other side so that my dad and mum had the kids in the middle of the picture.

I forced a smile on my face, thinking about Jade and her smile and her dimples and about how much I hated her as much as I loved her.

Merry fucking Christmas.

*

A/N: PHEW. That was a ride! haha Hoping to upload part II tomorrow! :D

Please vote and comment! I'm excited to hear your thoughts <3