FROM THE VERY BEGINNING, I knew that my relationship with Art would have its challenges. However, I have always prayed that we would be able to overcome any unexpected obstacles that we may face.

Today was challenging for me as unexpected events came at me all at once, and it did not prepare me for them. It took me several months of emotional conditioning to accept that Art would be leaving for Germany for a year. Following tonight's farewell dinner, we only have one day left before he departs for Munich.

Currently, the departure of Art is not my primary concern. However, the email from my doctor has wholly altered the situation. The magnitude of the news has weighed heavily on me, leaving me feeling powerless and unsure of what lies ahead.

"Shells! We're running late." Avery's urgent knock on the bathroom door caught me off guard.

"I'll be out in a sec!"

Upon leaving the bathroom, she gave me a thorough once-over before locking eyes with me.

"Art was worried about you. So are you crying?"

With a slight grin, I shook my head and mentioned, "I believe I've already spent all my tears."

Avery stood beside me and whispered, "You can count on me. You know that, right?"

I nodded and gently held onto Avery's hand resting on my shoulder. "Always. And I appreciate you."

"I am here for you, always seriously and sincerely."

I do not doubt that Avery will always be there for me. However, I have decided to keep my current issues to myself without knowing for how long. I know I cannot hinder Art from achieving his dreams due to my own discovery.

I love Art and want to see him thrive in all his endeavors. However, I fear that revealing my current situation could alter his decision to leave. As a result, I believe it's best to keep this secret to myself and make decisions independently for the time being.

***

You can reach me with just a phone call anytime you need me. And if you have a week off from school, I would happily fly you and Avery to Munich. Always remember, Shells, that I love you deeply and only you.

As Art boarded, I couldn't help but repeat his words. They reminded me to hold on and never forget the value of our bond despite the distance between us. Art has proven true to his promise by consistently calling and sending messages full of love and concern. Despite my initial denial of my situation, his expressions of love have given me strength and a renewed sense of purpose.

I know time is running out, and I cannot keep things to myself indefinitely. Eventually, the truth will surface, and those who discover it will encourage me to disclose it to Art.

Art will likely prioritize being with me, even if it means sacrificing an exceptional opportunity. Unfortunately, he's unable to leave Munich due to the year-long commitment of his internship contract. Additionally, as a team leader, he's expected to be available even during off days and holidays.

I can't bring myself to take that away from him. Loving him means witnessing him thrive, progress, and triumph. I vow to assist him in attaining his aspirations and ambitions. Revealing the news would hinder his accomplishments.

"Are you feeling any better?" Avery asked, her voice laced with concern as she gently massaged my back.

Today was the third day I couldn't stop vomiting face down the toilet. But unlike the previous days, Avery witnessed it. I begged my stomach to wait for my best friend to leave, but it didn't listen.

"Did you get a chance to see a doctor?" I felt a gentle lift of my hair from the sides of my face while a hand massaged my back.

I shook my head and replied, "I'm not unwell. I'm wonderful."

She handed me a towel, helped me up from the tiled floor, and remarked, "You don't seem to be doing well." However, she reassured me that Art had repeatedly instructed her to care for me.

"I'm doing well. I assure you," I said as I splashed water on my face to alleviate my anxiety and helplessness. "I believe it's just a stomach bug."

"No way!" Avery shook her head repeatedly. "That insect should have died weeks ago."

"Please, Ave," I said, gripping her hand. "Can you promise me that you won't mention anything to Art? I don't want him to worry unnecessarily."

"If you agree to see a doctor, I won't mention it again. I can accompany you if you'd like."

"I don't think I need to see a doctor. I'm just feeling the absence of Art, and my stress is causing me stomach problems."

Avery gently touched my shoulders and guided me to the living room.

"The more you need to see a doctor. I don't want you to lose your appetite and turn into sticks and bones by the time lover boy returns."

"I find that amusing!" I smiled, hoping to reassure her that I had improved.

"Sure," Avery acquiesced, lifting her hands in surrender. "I'll trust your diagnosis as a medical student. However, if the stomach ailment persists beyond the next day, I will personally escort you to the health services at the university."

"I promise, cross my heart!"

As Avery believed me, I felt a wave of relief wash over me and instinctively placed my hand on my chest. Now, I can take some time to contemplate my next move or perhaps steer clear of her in the mornings until my stomach settles.

***

As time passed, I became increasingly skilled at avoiding my best friend's company each morning. Instead of having breakfast together at our apartment, I found countless excuses to arrive early at places on campus, such as the bookstore, library, and labs.

I've noticed that the morning craziness in my stomach has subsided since I stopped trying to come up with excuses. However, Avery hasn't said anything about it, so I'm unsure if she's waiting for me to open up or is preoccupied with school.

I'm impressed by Art's constant display of affection through frequent video calls and messages. Over three months, I've habitually concealed any physical changes that could arouse suspicion, especially from my best friend. However, as the saying goes, the truth can reveal itself at the most unexpected moments.

Despite all my efforts to hide and plan, my body failed me again. It was then that I realized that I could no longer fit into any of my scrub suits. With only an hour left to prepare for my lab, the stress of finding even one suitable scrub proved too much for me to handle.

Without realizing it, I had scattered my clothes all over my bedroom while loudly cursing and sniffling. The commotion was so loud that it prompted Avery to rush to my room."What's going on here?" Avery asked as she slowly picked scrub after scrub from the door. Her forehead wrinkled as her eyes darted at my hand on my belly.

I struggled to find a way to calm her racing thoughts, but my mind was blank. I felt stuck and helpless. The moment I had feared had finally arrived - my secret was no longer safe. All my careful planning seemed to go to waste, and I was left with nothing.

As I thought about Art, I couldn't help but feel anxious about how he would react once he found out. It pained me to believe he might initially be upset or angry with me. However, I knew his priority would always be my safety and well-being. Despite this, I couldn't help but feel guilty knowing that pursuing my own needs might mean ending his dreams. The thought of him boarding a plane back to Boston weighed heavily on my mind.

As I stood there, I nervously said her name, "Ave." But before I could utter another word, her phone suddenly rang, interrupting our conversation.

As she received a call, she signaled me to pause and wait to attend to it.

"Yes, Mom," she replied calmly. I observed her complexion transition from flushed to ashen. "What happened? Please tell me." Tears streamed down her face as she trembled uncontrollably. "Don't worry; we'll be there. I promise."

I felt afraid and quickly embraced Avery, leading her to the edge of the bed. I gently brushed the hair strands from her face and wiped away her tears.

"Tell me what's going on?"

"We have to head to Boston General as soon as possible. My dad is already on his way to pick us up," Avery expressed urgently. She held my hands and apologized, "I'm so sorry, Shells. Your mom had a heart attack while at work and was rushed to the ER. The hospital tried reaching you but couldn't, so they contacted my mom as her second emergency contact."

***