[Note: All medical conditions mentioned here are fictitious. If you happen to relate to it (as I do) or think are affected by it, it's purely coincidental. 😅]

Doctors: Lifesavers and overall awesome people who do God's work on Earth.

Now you all are wondering why all of a sudden I am talking about doctors. No. No one is dying (except my sanity, which abandoned me long ago when Spock made heart eyes at Capt. Kirk for the first time in Star Trek TOS) however, someone is most definitely going to see our warriors (yes, I am talking about doctors) that too, in a branch that many Asians deem taboo: the department of psychiatry.

Most of you may have guessed already, that it was a particular Zhan, who had in the early hours of the evening, decided to pay a doctor specializing in workings of the mind a visit.

"So, Xiao loushi, how may I help you?" The man in white with a thining tuft of hair to match his robes, inquiries.

"I think I am losing time." Zhan blurts out, then fidgeting with his thumbs, he goes on, "I think that during that time I don't...I am not myself."

"Hum," The doctor bobs his head. "Something tells me that there is more you want to confide in me, but something is stopping you." The intuitive man guesses, "Whatever it is that is bothering you, however inappropriate you think it is, you can tell me. It will never leave this room." The doctor's fingers to do a 'zip my lips and throw away the key' motion.

Zhan leaves a shaky breath, "I think...I have feelings for someone I am going to be working closely with."

"Humm," the old gentleman strokes his chin and picks up his file, "It says here that you are an actor. So I am presuming that it must be a co-actor or someone for the crew."

"My co-actor." Zhan specifies, lowering his eyes as if ashamed. When the doctor continues to hold his silence, he adds, "Doctor, I think the condition started the day I met my co-actor for the first time."

"I am guessing this was the first time you met each other?" The doctor strokes his chin again and is surprised when Zhan shakes his head.

"Actually, when I had not yet forayed into acting, I had met him on another program." Zhan clarifies and purses his lips when he realizes that he had let the forbidden pronoun: 'him' slip.

"Hummm," the doctor doesn't react to the information, "How did you feel about him then?"

Zhan concludes that since he had already admitted that he had feelings for a man, he might as well come clean about everything else. After all, he had made the visit to seek help. What follows is a long monologue about everything he had been feeling, doing, and desiring since he had come in contact with Yibo just days back. After Zhan is done pouring his soul out, the doctor hums again. It reminds him of Lan Zhan, who had a few Mns here and there but had to convince the audience with those limited half-words that he was in love with him, I mean, Wei Ying.

The old man places his elbows on the table and sighs, "I think you are suffering from what we call FTGA. It's a relatively new condition. It usually affects FF-obsessed teens." He goes on to explain its symptoms and reasons for it's manifestation; he ends on a positive note, "It's not serious, which is good news for you. It will resolve by itself once you admit your true feelings to yourself."

"FF teens?" Zhan wonders aloud.

The doctor contemplates for a few, then starts explaining, "Fictional/fantasy obsessed teens; those kids who use fictional characters and scenarios as their anchors to get away from the reality of their lives, which sadly, they feel is too difficult for them to cope with. However, sometimes it's onset may be attributed to denial of feelings over prolonged periods."

"Oh." Zhan mouths.

Being a smart man, Zhan connects the dots. He understands what the doctor was trying to tell him without going into details and embarrassing him. After all, Zhan was a man in his prime who, unfortunately, was suffering from a condition that usually affected kids. He cries internally and panics a little too for, it dawns on him that he might have to do what he was avoiding: coming to terms with his feelings for Yibo and the consequences of it.

"Xiao loushi," the doctor addresses the lost man, pulling him back to the present, "I understand that neither the time nor the man you have feelings is ideal at the moment, but remember, change is the only constant. Either time or your preference might change, but till that time, I suggest you be honest, at least, to yourself."

With nothing else left to do, Zhan leaves the facility with a heavy heart. He hails a cab and puts the traveling time to good use; he tries to figure out what and how much he would like Yibo to know about his condition. For he had decided that he would not let it make him look like a bully or seem unprofessional.

On reaching his destination, his feet carry him towards his dorm, but before he can arrive, a commotion near what he knows to be Xia Jiejie's office draws his attention. It was a very odd time: 7 pm, to be precise, for anyone, let alone the costume and hairstyling crew, to be gathered there looking upset.

The whispers die down as soon as they notice the six-footer walk towards them.

Zhan eyes them suspiciously before he notices the hot doc with a dazed-looking Yibo hanging on his arm, plastered to each other as if even an inch of space between their bodies would result in instant death. Zhan wanted to be the deliverer of the said result. However, he wanted only the hot doc to be the receiver of it.

What do you mean Zhan is being unfair!? You can't expect him to react any other way when his co-actor, who he may or may not be in love with but definitely had impure thoughts about, was clinging to a tall, dark, broad-shouldered 'Hyung!'

The two pairs of eyes meet. Yes, Yibo's and Zhan's; was it just his imagination, or was Yibo looking a little embarrassed!? That is what Zhan wonders and pushes through the crowd and gently but possessively relieves the hot Dr. Kim of his duties.

Being the good Samaritan that Dr. Kim is, he lets go of his dongsaeng and offers Zhan a nod. He hands the injured man over with the kind of softness which reminds the older actor that the man who had been a pain in his side since he had appeared, despite how Zhan felt about him, was indeed a nice guy.

"What seems to be the problem?" Zhan enquires, leaning in closer than necessary; Yibo doesn't mind, actually he does some leaning of his own.

Thank Buddha only one of his shoulders was injured, for how would he take care of his personal matters otherwise. Matters which had become rather sensitive to a certain almond-eyed man's touch.

Yibo's lips twitch and turn down. Zhan absolutely hates whoever it was who had made the wonder-hips boy sad, "The looks they had decided for us will need to be changed. Forgive me; it's my fault."

Zhan changes his mind immediately. His anger dissipates. "I don't follow."

Yibo is about to clarify the matter when Xia Jiejie's commanding voice cuts through their private bubble, "Well, things like this happen sometimes. Thankfully it's not too late. Unfortunately, this means that we will have to forgo the camping trip or at least make some changes to the schedule." She massages her temples, "It's late; let's break for dinner. I don't want any blame games, be it cast or crew. We are a team. If there is discord, it will show on the screen. And that's the last thing any of us wants."

With that, the stern but sweet woman leaves.

It's not easy for women in any profession, and more if it is male-dominated. However, it's my firm belief that BLs are tackled best when women are calling shots or at least are an integral part of the decision-making team. Not the show Xia Jiejie was planning to make was BL per se. It was purely bromance, and everyone was super clear on what they were planning on creating: an angst-filled, heartwarming arc of failure, redemption, loyalty, and most importantly, LOVE, I mean brotherhood. It's all about brotherhood, nothing gay about gazing at your brother lovingly while imagining him pounding into you over and over...*cough*

I seem to have gotten distracted again. So, moving on.

Pounding, I mean, bonding with the team is essential, and Xia Jiejie being the professional she is, knows that. When everyone is out of earshot, and Zhan, supporting Yibo more intimately than brotherhood permits, is helping him to the dining area, the producer lady stops them. She starts with a most obvious question, "How is Yibo laushi feeling?"

"I should be fine in a few days, Jie. I am sorry for being reckless. I will not give you any more reason to be..."

"Nonsense! Accidents happen. We just have to deal with it and move on. However, because of this matter, I might need to bother you sooner than I would have liked." Xia Jiejie's tone is filled with regret. "I don't know how it didn't strike me. It's so obvious. Your sizes..." She sighs and lets the sentence hang, making Zhan extremely uncomfortable.

"Anything you need me-" Yibo starts and looks at Zhan for approval, and after receiving it, he adds, "-us to do, please don't hesitate."

The lady smiles, relieved, "I will text you the details in an hour or so." She turns to Zhan, "Hope you are feeling refreshed after your break?" She asks, and when the latter nods, she adds, "I will send someone over with dinner."
Zhan shakes his head, "Jiejie, I will come to fetch it for both of us."

The woman agrees; she returns to her office, and the duo walks the rest of the way to their room in silence.

Once inside, Zhan makes Yibo comfortable, and after enquiring if he required anything specific, he leaves.
Left alone, Yibo wonders yet again how and where his roommate had spent the evening. He avoids thinking about Zhan wrapped in Yang Mi's embrace, for the younger knew that his Bae was her fanboy. Yet, he can't get away from the uneasy feeling that makes him feel nauseous when his mind drifts to how Zhan had avoided answering where he was going and not seemed jealous at all.

You see, Yibo had missed the silent communication that had happened between Dr. Kim and Zhan moments ago and had actually started to think that it wouldn't bother the older at all if he were to throw himself all over Hyung.

While Yibo is drowning in firey pits of self-doubt, Zhan returns with dinner.
As soon as they start, Zhan asks, "What was that all about?" Referencing the commotion outside the bosses' office.

"The hair accessories and wig department were troubled because Jie pointed out that their previous suggestions won't work. Remember we had a costume photo session?" Yibo says, chomping down on his chow.

"The individual ones we all did?"
Yibo nods and sighs, "Ya. That one."
Lifting his bowl of soup, Zhan gestures the latter to continue.

Yibo averts his eyes and licks his lips to get to the run away noodle. Zhan, as expected, has a mini heart attack.

'You should definitely help the poor injured man child get rid of that noodle.' The proverbial devil on Zhan's shoulder coos, making Zhan forget the topic of discussion. As he stares fixedly at the red weapons of seduction. It sends Zhan's lower half, especially the part below his waist, in an 'active/interested mood.'

*F@$&^€#@£€K*
(Not a typing error)
Zhan thinks. And as if on cue, the bowl of soup slips through his fingers and lands in his lap.

Is the soup scalding hot? Or has it gone lukewarm? To know more about the tales of the fallen man and his counterpart, the fallen bowl of soup, stay tuned!

[Note: That's it for this update.

Sorry for going MIA for so long.
I will be updating Mine with an author's note in a few days. I will look forward to your feedback on it.

If you have enjoyed this update, please Vote and show your support.

Thank you for reading.
Have a nice day!]