Pairing: Soraru x Mafumafu
Genre: Angst

I haven't proofread this yet but I still decided to put this out before going to sleep~ Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy this! Good night~

"Seeing that Mafumafu was growing even more popular every day, Soraru realized that he wasn't needed anymore."

"So-ra-ru-san~", an albino exclaimed as he threw himself onto a ravenette. "What is it, Mafu?", Soraru asked annoyed as the younger male only giggled at the older's attitude. "Let's go to a cafe to discuss the next AtR song today!", Mafumafu exclaimed as the older male thought about it before sighing and nodding.

"I guess we can do that. Let me pack my things and then we can go.", Soraru said, giving in to his friend's wishes. Mafumafu only cheered before he jumped up and down waiting for the ravenette to finish. "Let's go.", Soraru merely said as he swung his bag over his shoulder as Mafumafu did so as well before he followed the older male.

Once they arrived at the cafe, they sat down in the back corner where they could talk to each other in peace. "So I think that we should make this song go more into this kind of direction.", Mafumafu started as he explained Soraru about the image he had in mind for the song.

"Hm... yeah, let's go with that.", Soraru agreed after listening to it making the albino's face brighten up in delight when the ravenette agreed to him. "Great! I'll work on the song and send you the audio after I'm done then!", Mafumafu exclaimed as the older male only hummed in response. The younger male started talking cheerfully about how the song could be while Soraru only listened to him.

Whenever he was with Mafumafu, he couldn't help but think that the albino was truly talented. Not only did he have a unique voice which would draw many people in but he could also compose his own songs, pouring all of his emotions into them.

With his unique voice, composing skills, adorable appearance and incredible character, it was no surprise for Mafumafu to be the number one Utaite in japan.

In Soraru's eyes, Mafumafu was the most incredible and perfect human being in this rotten world. Even if Mafumafu had a terrible past which all of his fans knew about. Even if Mafumafu had his insecurities about people disliking his music or himself.

Soraru still thought of Mafumafu as the most beautiful thing in the world.

And he decided to be there for Mafumafu as long as he was needed.

*****

A soft music starting ringing throughout the room as Soraru slightly stirred before waking up confused to see that someone was calling him right now. He picked up the phone and looked at the caller ID to see that it was Mafumafu. Confused and worried, he picked his phone up.

"Mafu? Is something wrong?", Soraru asked trying to wake up completely. "S-soraru-san... Sorry for calling you now b-but—", Mafumafu stopped talking as he hiccuped trying to calm his sobbing down to talk again.

"I— C-can you— *hic*". "It's ok, Mafu. I'll be there soon.", Soraru said as Mafumafu only hummed before Soraru quickly hung up before getting out of his bed and quickly putting on some shoes before heading out, not even bothering to change his clothes.

He rushed towards the albino's apartment which was fortunately really close to his apartment.

As soon as he arrived, he took the spare keys out that he got from Mafumafu some time ago, not even bothering to knock as he opened the door and stepped inside.

He took his shoes off as he walked straight into the albino's bedroom where the younger male was sitting on his bed, hugging his knees.

Mafumafu looked up as soon as he heard the door opening and Soraru walked over to him quickly, so the albino didn't have to run over to him, as he opened his arms.

The younger male immediately took that chance as he hugged the ravenette's torso, burying his face into the older male's chest as Soraru could practically feel the tears draining his shirt.

The older male didn't care though as he just hugged the albino back, pulling him closer while leaning down slightly for the albino to get more warmth.

He softly ran a hand through Mafumafu's hair as he started muttering encouraging words to the younger male. "It's alright. I'm here now. Everything will be alright.", Soraru whispered quietly as Mafumafu only tightened his grip on Soraru's shirt as he continued to softly sob.

It was one of those nights again. Those nights where Mafumafu's doubt and fear overtook him until they pulled him into the dark pits of despair. On those nights, Soraru would be there for him, telling him the truth about how all of his friends and fans loved him and his music dearly. And that he didn't have to worry at all.

And due to it being Soraru, Mafumafu managed to get convinced every time. Soraru continued whispering encouraging words until the albino's sobbing slowly got quieter before Mafumafu pulled away. "Are you alright now? Or do you need anything else? If so, I can bring you anything you want.", Soraru said as he kneeled down to be on eye height with the younger male.

Mafumafu only shook his head while Soraru wiped his tears away gently. "All I want is...", Mafumafu started as the raven-haired male understood and nodded. "Alright. Lay down then.", Soraru said as Mafumafu immediately did as told as he looked at Soraru who sat next to his bed, stroking his head with one hand while he grasped the albino's hand with his other one.

And then... he started singing something for Mafumafu. Mafumafu only closed his eyes as Soraru did the same, both of them listening to the husky yet soothing voice of the raven-haired male and concentrating on it.

"There was a time when I thought about dying. It must have been because I hadn't met you yet. And if people like you can exist in this world, then maybe I like it a little after all. And if people like you are living in this world, then maybe it's alright to hope a little too..."

Soraru's last note resonated through the room as Mafumafu had a small smile on his face. "Me too. I'm like that person in the song. I also thought about dying. But thanks to you... I could continue life on with you and everyone. Thank you.", Mafumafu thanked him as Soraru didn't say anything at first and just squeezed the albino's hands.

"I see... Do you still want to die?", Soraru asked. "Not anymore. Because you were there for me.", Mafumafu answered with a small smile, his eyes still closed.

"Do you want to live then?", Soraru questioned. "Yes. I want to live to continue making music for everyone to listen to. I want to save people with music just like it saved me before.", Mafumafu replied.

"Are you... satisfied with your life? Are you happy now?", Soraru asked.

"Yes. Until the end of my life, I will continue on with music and do my best to reach people with my songs.", Mafumafu answered. "I see... That's good then.", Soraru said in his usual calm tone.

But his expression showed happiness and pain at the same time, tears streaming down his face as Soraru was actually struggling to keep his voice normal so Mafumafu wouldn't notice.

And Mafumafu's eyes were feeling very heavy right now which is why he never saw the expression on Soraru's face.

"Thank you for everything you've done for me. Thanks for helping me getting this far.", Mafumafu thanked the older male as he squeezed Soraru's hand one last time before he fell asleep.

"Thank you for being there for me in my hardest time of my life...", Mafumafu whispered before he stopped saying anything as his breathing evened indicating that he fell asleep.

"You... are giving too much credit, Mafu. I only gave you a light push towards the right direction ... But thank you for at least thinking so.", Soraru muttered. He gently caressed Mafumafu's face as he reminisced the past.

In the past, Mafumafu was even frailer and a mess. But now, he had a lot of friends, thousands of fans and admirers and his music. He remembered how Mafumafu depended on him a lot in the past, these kind of nights, happening very often.

But now, it would only be on rare times when his nightmares were so horrible that he couldn't do anything else but call Soraru. But even then, it was probably only him because Mafumafu was used to it always being him. It wouldn't make a difference if Soraru was exchanged with someone else.

He knew that. Soraru checked his phone to see the comments on a frequent AtR song. Most of them were positive. But many of them were also hate directed towards them. Towards Mafumafu. And especially towards him.

"Uwah, Soraru didn't do anything again this time either."

"Why do Mafumafu's songs have to be like this so often?"

"Soraru doesn't do anything for AtR. Why is he even allowed to sing with Mafumafu?"

"Get away from Mafumafu-sama already! You do nothing but waste his time!"

"Now that I think about it... Mafumafu does all the work, doesn't he? Soraru just sings the songs so why does Mafumafu even want to work with him?"

Usually, he wouldn't mind that. In the past, he wouldn't have minded that. But now, being in After the Rain with Mafumafu... it changed him.

He started to show more emotions because of Mafumafu. He started to care more because of Mafumafu. And that's why, he started to worry more about dragging the albino down. Being reminded that so often, of course he'd know.

That he wasn't needed anymore.

He packed his phone away as he gently brushed Mafumafu's bangs away, smiling sadly as he let go of the other's hand.

"I'm proud of you for getting so far and becoming so successful. Everything will be alright now. You'll have enough friends being there to support you now. Amatsuki... Sakata... Urata... Luz... and many more. They'll be there for you and someone can take my place when I'm not here anymore.

Thanks for singing together with me and creating After the Rain with me. Thanks for wanting to stay with me even though I always pretended to be annoyed. Thanks for showing me how to love. Please continue on with life and strive for even higher.", Soraru said before he looked at the sleeping albino and smiled fondly.

He leaned down slightly as he placed a soft kiss on Mafumafu's forehead before he stood up and walked to the door.

He then looked back once more and took a last look at Mafumafu before exiting the apartment. Soraru walked through the night streets as he looked up at the clear sky with stars decorating them.

Soraru could hear the sound of the cars and people growing fainter as he walked towards an abandoned building laying in the middle of a flower field. It was beautiful there.

It was the place where he would go whenever he felt stressed or needed to calm down.

Originally, he intended to bring Mafumafu here so that the albino could have a place like that as well. But Mafumafu didn't need that anymore.

Soraru only took in the sweet scent of the white flowers covering the whole field as he walked into the building and walked the stairs up until he reached the rooftop.

The moon was out shining in its fullest light. He then decided to do something he'd usually never do, sitting down on the edge of the building and letting his feet dangling from the building as he had the possibility to see the wide white flower field being lighted by the moonlight.

"Strange. For some reason, I don't feel scared of the height at all like I usually would be.", Soraru said laughing lightly.

He then shifted his attention back on the magnificent scenery in front of him. Seeing all of this, Soraru suddenly got the motivation to sing.

So he decided that he would, knowing that no one would hear him anyway.

(You can listen to it to while reading this UwU Here you go ww)

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

He imagined the instrumental intro playing in his head before he opened his mouth and started singing. He continued singing, pouring out all of his emotions as he wished for someone to hear them. His hidden pain. His hidden suffering.

That he both had hidden the whole time for the sake of not wanting anyone to worry about him. Because he was the one who everyone relied on.

So he couldn't risk to show his weak side. He couldn't risk for the people he wanted to help, not wanting to bother him anymore.

"Hey, I'm trying to sing a song and look up at the moon here. Someday to you, only to you, I want it to reach you. I don't need promises anymore so I want you to keep shining on me.

Always barefoot, never forgetting, towards the scent of the morning. The rustling sound of waves, suddenly it looked down at the flickering water's surface. The faintly shining moon smiled.

That's what it felt like...", Soraru sang the last part as he had a soft smile on his face.

"The moon is really beautiful tonight. I wish I could have seen it with you once at least, Mafumafu...", Soraru whispered as he looked around to see that no one was there before he looked down to see a pool of white flowers in front of him.

This was the ideal place where he would want to be in his last moments of life.

"Ah... there is going to be quite something going on after this... But I'm sure you'll be alright. With the help of everyone... please continue on singing. Goodbye.", Soraru said before he pushed himself off the building with a smile on his face.

No one was there to stop him. No one was there to witness him at that time.

But when someone did come, they would see a raven-haired male laying on his back, tainting the pure white flowers with his blood as his eyes were closed and a small smile formed on his face.

And so, Soraru's story had ended.

*****

If on that day, Mafumafu had looked at Soraru and saw his expression. If on that day, he hadn't fallen asleep. If on that day, he had woken up when he felt someone kissing him softly on the forehead. It could have ended differently.

A loud knock woke him up as he sat up confused, seeing that Soraru had left. He wasn't surprised though as this happened a lot of times so he just walked to the door and opened it, surprised to see some police officers standing there.

"Good morning. Are you Mafumafu-san?", one of the policemen asked as Mafumafu nodded confused. "Yes... Is something the matter?", the albino asked. The first policeman turned to the other male as he nodded before turning back to Mafumafu.

"We are sorry to say this but last night someone took his life. He had a note beside him with your name on it and a key to this apartment so we thought you might be acquainted to him.", he said as Mafumafu felt really sick already.

"W-what was his name?", Mafumafu asked hoping that they would name a stranger's name and would have mistaken him for the very person who the albino is thinking about.

"We don't know what his name is. But he had this note with him which was addressed to you. So we were hoping that you would know this man's identity.", he said as Mafumafu's heart fell into his stomach. He still believed that it wouldn't be the one he thought of.

But when he opened the note, he felt like throwing up. There wasn't much written in there.

There wasn't even a name signed there. But he would recognize that handwriting everywhere and the words seemed like it would belong to the raven-haired male he grew to love.

I'm sorry. Please continue to sing with everyone and strive an even higher goal with everyone. Even if I am not part of that "everyone" anymore. I'll watch you even if I'm not by your side anymore. I will always love you, Mafumafu.

"Mafumafu-san, are you alright? Do you need—", the police officer was interrupted by a loud scream as they both looked at the albino in shock who only sunk down onto his knees, clinging onto the paper as if his life depended on it.

"Soraru-san... Soraru-san... Soraru-san! SORARU-SAN!", Mafumafu cried out his name as if he expected an answer.

The two men tried to calm the albino down who only cried even more.

"This is not fair! This is not fair! You can't leave me back all alone just because I said I was happy!

Just because I have friends now! Doesn't mean, you can just go!

Because if you leave me... If you leave me— All my purpose and life meaning is gone!", Mafumafu shouted at the older male who wasn't there.

"Please calm down, Mafumafu-san. We will explain you what happened and what we could find out while investigating.", the policeman said as he helped Mafumafu up and they both helped him get into the car before driving to the police station.

If on that day, Mafumafu had looked at Soraru and saw his expression.

If on that day, he hadn't fallen asleep. If on that day, he had woken up when he felt someone kissing him softly on the forehead.

It could have ended differently. But now everything was too late. Soraru was gone.

And Mafumafu couldn't do anything besides wishing to turn back time.

He wished he could turn back time and could have stopped Soraru from ending his own life.

He wished he could have returned the favor of Soraru always being the one consoling him. He wished he could have saved Soraru this time.

Just like Soraru saved him. But that was all just a wish that would never come true.

Soraru was gone.

And there was nothing Mafumafu could do to change that.

To be continued