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private messages

burt macklin
Hey Paris!

paris
hold on

paris
i'm eating cheetos

paris
ok sup

burt macklin
Just wanted to check in on you to see how you're doing. I haven't seen you in forever! We need to catch up.

paris
i'm doing awesome chris!

paris
and yes, i haven't seen you in forever

paris
it's been a good minute

burt macklin
Minute?

paris
oh right

paris
i'll rephrase

paris
since you're like 80 years old

burt macklin
Not my fault that I don't know the ins and outs of young people😕

burt macklin
You'll be happy to hear that Tom has been helping me with that

paris
oh yes i forgot ur a superhero now

paris
now that you're bffs with chris hemsworth can i hang out with you more

burt macklin
I'm sort of hurt that you are using me to get to the other Chris

burt macklin
But I really want to see you so I have to sacrifice my feelings

paris
wtf

paris
who said anything about sacrificing

paris
what r these superheroes getting you into

burt macklin
We wake up every morning at sunrise to go pray to the superhero blockbuster god, Heath Ledger, then at lunch we give food offerings to our creator and maker, Stan Lee

paris
u do realize that heath ledger played the joker right

paris
and that isn't marvel

burt macklin
Okay whatever

burt macklin
He is still the superhero blockbuster god

paris

paris
yes

burt macklin
That just made me think of this

burt macklin

paris
wow

paris
i am literally amazed at ur meme intellect

paris
who is ur master

burt macklin
I work with some young people, remember? They keep me up to date with some things

paris

burt macklin
I'm not even that old

burt macklin
You just think that I am because I use proper grammar

paris
ur still old to me

paris
anyways how hot is chris hemsworth's australian accent from 1-10

burt macklin
It is beautiful

paris
i'm so glad to hear

paris

paris
this is important u need to answer david dobrik really wants to know

burt macklin
But why

paris
just do it

paris
it's a part of my paycheck ok

burt macklin
Well then

burt macklin
I'd have to say that I'm an Icy Pole

paris
good answer

paris
i like it

burt macklin
Well which one are you?

paris
oh right

paris
i'm definitely bubble o' bill

burt macklin
You love cracking up a cold one with the boys?

paris
of course every weekend

burt macklin
This David person

paris
yes my bff and boss?

burt macklin
Is that the vlog squad thing you're in?

paris
yes that's exactly it

paris
why so

burt macklin
I want to meet all of your friends!

paris

paris

paris
is this real

paris
r u joking

burt macklin
Nope, no jokes here!

paris
WOW

paris
david is going to cry

paris
so that means you'll do a video with us??

burt macklin
Sure! I'll do a video blog!

paris

paris
it's just vlog, chris

burt macklin
Oh, right

burt macklin

paris
you memeing yourself is the best thing i've ever witnessed

burt macklin
See ya in the vlog!

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honestly???? don't know what i'm doing but whatever