It is amazing how time manages to pass, even when enduring an unbearable wait. Months turned into years and soon my daughter was no longer a baby. It was just before her third birthday that Mary was offered a bed in the main dorm. She was far under the age when that might be deemed appropriate, of course. Young children required more care, made far too much noise, and were a distraction to grown humans who were meant to be attending to their own chores and duties.

    But Dulane was true to his vow that Mary would belong to me fully and I would be able to raise her myself. An empty bed was set beside my own for the girl. Though I tried to help her adjust to her new accommodations, I mostly relented to Mary's desire for company, avoiding any complaint by taking her into my own bed and sleeping with her small form wrapped in my arms. I could not have imagined a greater heaven.

    Every night as Mary snuggled close, I lay in silence, watching her features relax, her light breath moving her small chest in an even rhythm of calm repose. I savored her smell, her youth, her contentment, more addictive than any drug. I knew there was nothing I wouldn't sacrifice to keep my daughter safe.

    A well behaved and intelligent child, Mary was eager and obedient, following by my side, toddling as fast as her small legs would carry her so she might keep up. I encouraged her independence, refusing to pick her up even when she complained during longer treks when the weather was unfavorable. I was determined to train her, as my mother had trained me, to be strong and self-sufficient.

    In the kitchen, where she was now allowed to venture, Mary was remarkably attentive to instruction. When childish rebellion did rear its ugly head I was quick to correct the behavior, pain piercing my heart at the whimper and tears shed from my sharp slaps upon her rear. She had to learn as quickly as possible. There could be no room for mistakes.

    Under my tutelage Mary could soon shell eggs, shuck corn, and scrub vegetables with increasing skill. She was an eager student, eyeing my every action as she observed me at my work, happy to help with mixing and dough kneading. When Dulane surprised us one day and observed my daughter the expression of satisfaction on his face was undisguised.

    "Truly Mariana's namesake," he said, offering me a smile of approval. "The resemblance is uncanny."

    I felt only pride in his comments, my concerns for Mary's future lessened in his genuine care for the girl. And yet, in spite of my efforts, Rin was not patient with her youngest kitchen assistant.
   
When the child tripped one day, spilling a basket of potatoes onto the floor, Rin was there to slap her hard across the face. I could do nothing to stop it, merely watching as my poor child sniffled in a fight to hold back tears, crawling on her hands and knees to clean the mess quickly, as ordered.

    I tried to keep Mary as close as possible after that, but Rin continued to perceive the girl as a distraction, complaining that I was unfocused on my duties in her presence. It was not long before our overseer determined that Mary would only be allowed in the kitchens for specified periods during which I might train her. I was ordered to leave the girl at the nursery every morning before I went to work. She would be permitted to meet me at mid-day for a meal and kitchen lessons before dinner preparation began. I could retrieve her in the evening after my chores were complete.

    Though the arraignment filled me with anxiety I had no choice but to comply. As a human I had no true control over my own life, let alone my daughter's. Like it or not, it seemed my life and Dreda's would not be so easily separated as I'd hoped.

    The first morning of our new schedule I forced Mary out of bed long before sunrise, allowing for plenty of time to brush and plait her hair, ensuring she was dressed well and clean. I wanted to keep her presentable at all times. To continue to cultivate the image of the beautiful Mariana that would keep my daughter safe. Though Mary grumbled and complained in her sleepy crankiness, a few sharp words and threats quickly gained her compliance. In fact, when I told her she was going to see Miss Dreda, her eyes lit up with delight, whining giving way to obedience and excitement.

    I tried to fight back the tinge of jealousy I felt in seeing her so eager to return to the nursery. I was her mother, not Dreda. Though I wanted my child to be happy, I knew some part of me wished she were as devastated at our temporary separation as I was. Still, I smiled back at her delight. A happy compliant child was more winning than a surly one, and far more likely to maintain favor on the estate.

    As I suspected she might be, Dreda was there to greet us when we arrived at the nursery complex. She smiled wide as Mary quickly loosed her grasp on my hand and ran to Dreda who wrapped the girl in a tight embrace.

    "I'd missed you, little Mary," she said, lifting the child from the ground as Mary giggled with delight.

    "You will send her to the kitchen at midday?" I said, trying to keep my tone steady though jealousy and frustration threatened to take my voice. In spite of my best efforts, Mary would once again be at Dreda's mercy.

    The woman's smile faded as she met my gaze, expression inscrutable.

    "Of course," she answered. "That is our Master's command. Mary will have the chance to socialize and learn other chores, but her destiny is the kitchen. She will be your successor, Alice, as promised. You need only have patience and keep caring for and training her as you already have."

    "Miss Dreda, are Jillian and Cindy still here?" Mary interjected, squirming in Dreda's arms with excitement. The older woman turned her attention back to my daughter, all smiles again as she nodded, setting Mary back on her feet.

    "They are here and eager to see you, as are all the others. You see, Alice," Dreda said, addressing me again. "Your daughter has friends here. This arrangement is perfect for all. I'm certain it will be easier to concentrate on your chores without a toddler to offer distraction in any case. Mary will be there to meet you in the kitchen before you know it."

    I nodded once, accepting Dreda's words but not meeting her gaze. I could hardly refute the benefit to allowing my daughter the companionship of other children as I had been denied in my youth but I still could not quite trust the nursery overseer, nor could I throw off my resentment that somehow, no matter how much I tried, I could not escape her power.

    I walked to my daughter and crouched down till we were face to face. "Mama loves you," I said, grasping her arms tightly and planting a kiss on her forehead. The child pulled away and wiped the kiss with a small grimace.

    "I wanna go play," she complained. I fought to keep the tears from my eyes as I released my hold and rose from the ground. I moment later I felt the tight grasp of a hand on my wrist and turned to see Dreda holding me back.

    "I swear I will protect her with my very life," she said softly as our eyes locked, Dreda forcing my gaze. The sincerity in her expression was almost enough to convince me the pledge was real. I only nodded silently in response and felt her grip release with my acknowledgment.

    "You look well, Alice," she said as I began to walk away.

    "I have work and mustn't dally," I replied without turning back. I knew I couldn't bear to see the old woman's hand in my daughter's again.

———

*A/N*

Sigh. I love Alice but the end of this chapter makes me so sad for Dreda. Anyone else? This woman has a horrifically hard and sad life. She gives a lot to these children knowing they are doomed. She loved Mariana and Alice & now this little girl & Alice only resents her for it though the care seems pretty darn sincere. Just sad all around. Rereading this time I am tempted to make a short Dreda story. Its in my mind already. How Mariana helped her. Why she cares so much for Alice... we shall see lol