(A/N - my comments will be written in bold.)

Name: Nightfeather.

Interesting name. I don't often see names like this. It doesn't exactly make sense.

Age: 63 moons.

That's quite a young age for deputy, assuming you mean 63 human months.

Gender: Female.

Quite common to see a female character, but nothing wrong with that.

Sexuality: Bisexual.

Glad to see a wider range of sexualities, and a commonly misunderstood one too. 👍

Clan: ShadowClan (deputy).

It's unusual for me to find characters in ShadowClan - it's a nice change. Deputy is a commonly used rank, but it seems to fit Nightfeather so far.

Personality: Even-tempered, passionate for what she cares for, daring, but also can be bossy and sarcastic.

I think one or too more negative traits could be incorporated, perhaps. Could you also be a little more specific with what she's passionate about?

Appearance: black she-cat with amber eyes and barely visible tabby stripes. She has a nicked ear and a couple claw marks on her left shoulder.

I love seeing black cats with amber eyes as I find it such an underrated but great mix. I like how specific you get with the scars and extra markings. A nicked ear is a marking I see used a lot.

Mate: Mudfire.

Confusing name. I personally wouldn't use that kind of name as both 'Mud' and 'fire' - I think - would both relate to a cat's looks, and brown and a ginger-y colour probably aren't possible. Also, a written appearance or small bit of backstory/information on him would be good.

Kit: Lilynose (adopted).

I absolutely love the name. Both the prefix and suffix are highly underappreciated. I also like the fact she's adopted (I don't often see that) and could be used in so many different ways to help the story or roleplay. But again, appearance and backstory. Why is she adopted?

Cause of death: Greencough when she's an elder.

I'm relieved that it isn't some noble death at the paws of a villian or a valiant sacrifice for a friend, lover or family member. I like the simple, sad death.

Legacy: Pebblekit (she-cat), Icekit (tom) and Quietkit (tom) - Lilynose's kits.

This is an extremely humble legacy - something I love. It'd be nice to know their looks and personalities though.

Strengths: Stalking, discipline, leadership and fighting.

A nice, simple list. Certainly fits a ShadowClan deputy - the stalking and leadership - but I think fighting and discipline is a little vague. Any specific moves or where does she fight best? Is she good with handling difficult cats or overall someone you wouldn't disobey?

Weaknesses: Easily distracted, can lack empathy and be slow to react.

None of these are traits are ones I've seen used before, which is nice. They're not the best traits for a deputy to have, but I guess that's why they're weaknesses!

Likes: Frogs, sparrows, sunny weather and enclosed spaces like forests.

Fair enough. Not much to say, except it's a little vague again.

Dislikes: Getting wet, being in open spaces and mice (too much fur)

I feel like the dislike towards more furry animals is more of a RiverClan trait but I guess it could work for ShadowClan as they often eat frogs, toads and lizards. The rest is fine.

Hunting: 7.5/10
Fighting: 9/10
Swimming: 2.5/10
Climbing: 6.5/10
Running: 7/10
Stalking: 8.5/10
Leadership: 8.5/10

I feel like Nightfeather has too many higher skills. She's only bad at swimming - obviously - but everything else is a pretty high mark. It'd be best to lower a couple, like running and climbing (more WindClan and SkyClan skills).

Note: She retired to the elders den before she had the chance to become leader.

I think this is my favourite part of the character. I've honestly never seen an OC deputy that doesn't become some great leader, and having Nightfeather retire before getting the chance to be a leader is a good idea.

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Overall, I'd say Nightfeather is a pretty decent character but - like all OCs - have a few points I advise are worked on. With the name, it sounds pretty but doesn't make that much sense. She also seems a little old to be a deputy still (I assume that around 60 moons - 12ish years - that cats would retire and die sooner than kittypets as they're wild. But it's up to you with that one. I think my biggest concern is the lack of description for smaller characters and the skill levels.
My advice is you lower some of those skills and work a little more on flaws and descriptions.

Thank you so much for sending your OC Orca, and feel free to send more if you wish!

- Grey