Firewolf0402

Name: Tigerflame I find this a very bland name.

Past names: Tigerkit, Tigerpaw

Future name(s): None

Name Reason: Tigerflame's father hoped that he will be as brave and strong as a tiger, and with his stripes his father named him Tigerkit. He was named Tigerflame because the leader thought that Tigerflame had a flame of determination inside him that will never burn out. I didn't just scoff reading this cause it was kinda cringy.

Description: A muscular brown tabby with fierce amber eyes. His fur feels smooth and silky. He has a scar over one of his eye and a scar spiralling down his left foreleg. Spiralling? Like claws just spiral down his legs, what makes sense.

Gender: Male

Rank: Warrior

Past ranks: Kit, apprentice

Age: 30 moons

Age at death: None he's living doesn't mean you can't say when he dies. Thinking ahead is important too.

Clan: Mountainclan I would have loved more information.

Past clan(s): None

Personality: Fierce, determined, sometimes seem intimidating to younger cats, but cats who really know him knows that he's soft at heart, but will sometimes scold himself for being too soft.Likes: The mountain breeze, hunting, serving his clan he kinda gives off Mary Sue vibes not gonna lie. I feel like his needs heap more flaws.

Dislikes: Disloyal cats, too much fighting (he knew that some fighting is necessary), being trapped inside a den

Does he have any likes?

Kin:
Finchwhisker(father) - a brown tabby with an average-sized body, long whiskers (what he was named for) a white forepaw and pale green eyes
Goldenmist (mother) - a golden she-cat with fur slightly longer than average and tabby-markings. She has very sharp claws and amber eyes. I do like her name.
Amberfrost (sister) - a beautiful white she-cat with golden flecks all over her body and green eyes. She's slim.
Ravenkit (son) - black tom with white paws, white chest and white tail-tip. He has green eyes (I'm just thinking here, yellow and blue makes green, right?). Yeah I think they do.
Twigkit (son) - a small brown tabby with white paws and blue eyes.
No warrior names? Does this mean they die or...?

Mate: Nightfern - a black she-cat with white chest, a white front paw and white tail-tip. She has blue eyes. I love her name.

Crush: None he has a mate though his mate could be his crush.

Mentor (former) obviously - Scorchheart - Flame-coloured muscular tom with a white front paw and swirling patterns on his pelt. He has green eyes. Again great name.

Apprentice: Snowpaw - a white she-cat with blue eyes and black flecks on her pelt
No warrior name either? Died as well?

Backstory: Tigerkit always felt like he needed to please his father. I just read that is the most dirtiest way possible. Finchwhisker has told him the origin of his name soon after he opened his eyes, and Tigerkit never forgot it.  I'm not sure how he could remember without being told either again, pretty good memory? He tried to act brave and tough in front of his father, just to make him think that Tigerkit has not disappointed him. Oof. This is the reason why most of the other kits in the nursery thought that he was not kind. Because he acted almost  prideful to not disappoint his father? Tigerkit was saddened by this (because he was a gentle cat at heart), but he continued his behaviour. Only his sister (Amberkit), Nightkit and Breezekit saw through his cover and they became friends, and Tigerkit gradually begun to show more of his true form, knowing that he could relax and be himself around them. That's kinda sad. When they all became apprentices, Tigerpaw and Nightpaw's bond became stronger as they trained together. Breezepaw and Amberpaw, on the other paw, thank you for say paw and not hand. liked to hang out with each other more rather than more than Tigerpaw would more better. with Tigerpaw and Nightpaw, but their friendship still didn't break. Once, when they were hunting, a hawk swooped down and picked up Nightpaw. For a moment, Tigerpaw thought he was going to lose her. He wailed and desperately attempted to jump towards the hawk. A tiny spark of determination, courage and fury appeared in him that moment. He sprung up, claws fully unsheathed as he clawed and bit the bird with fury. In the battle, the bird's talon scratched a deep wound onto Tigerpaw's eye before it fell to the ground. Oh, no more eye? The incident got the two apprentices into the medicine den for a moon, only a moon? but that only gave them time to learn about each other more, even though Tigerpaw was extremely annoyed with being trapped in the den with a throbbing, injured eye and scratches. I see not, lucky. At their first battle with Windclan, Breezepaw was killed. That must have hurt. Everyone mourned for him, Amberpaw especially. Who's Amberpaw? Just a random apprentice?She and Breezepaw had developed an extremely close friendship over the past 6 moons, and Tigerpaw was half-guilty, thinking that he failed to protect his sister. He held that attitude for a long time. I bet his father didn't help either, or you could add that in. However, turned out that the battle made them warriors. The three friends became Nightfern, Tigerflame and Amberfrost. Amberfrost denied her warrior duties for a few days, constantly mourning for Breezepaw. Understandable. She then dragged herself to patrols, but never willingly and her usual playful self was gone. Grief does that. Tigerflame was worried, and he began to always volunteer to do Amberfrost's duties, giving her time against many warriors' opinions. Amberfrost gradually realised that even without Breezepaw, he was still watching from Starclan and she was still loved by many other cats in the clan. Finchwhisker and Goldenmist had retired into the elders' den by then. Although Amberfrost never fully regained her original self, she became brighter and even started to make jokes. Lol I can relate to that. 2 moons later, Tigerflame discovered that Nightfern was expecting his kits with delight. He did all he could for them, and Ravenkit and Twigkit was born. Tigerflame felt that his life was completed. Oh sweet
Realised Amber is his sister lol.

I think there's a lot to improve on. 6/10, it's not bad but you can to heaps better.