My Hero

"HAVE you heard the movie like love story of Jackson and Nikita?"

"Is it true? That Jackson saved her when there are couples of gangster that tried to harass her?"

"I thought they are just rumours before, but one of my friends is classmate of them. They said they saw them together going to the infirmary right after the incident."

"Imagine, there are five gangster against Jackson. Isn't he a hero? Right after that they become a couple."

"Who wouldn't want to be together with someone like Jackson? Ah. I envy Nikita..."

I rolled my eyes. I can't stand hearing them gossiping about that incident. They got it all wrong. Those senseless rumours... why can't it just die already? It's been months and they still going for it every time they see me and Jackson.

"I want Rion." I looked at Jackson with disappointed look. "Why do I have to be with you? It's because of you that all that rumours start spreading like wild fire. And you didn't correct them, not even once."

Jackson smiled nonchalantly. "It's not like I want it, Rion asked for it."

"I missed him." I bit my lower lip to stop myself for crying. "It's been week. Why can't I just go to him?"

"He doesn't want to spread another rumour."

Jackson is not my boyfriend. I don't like him a bit. I was just forced to get along with him to give people a neutral answer. It's not like we confirmed that we are dating, we are just letting them assume that we are.

The one I'm dating is Rion. The one who saved me before was Rion and not Jackson. It just happened that Rion let Jackson take me to the infirmary because he's still handling those worthless gangsters.

Rion is the direct opposite of Jackson. He's a shut-in person. He rather stay in his condo rather than spend a day outside. He's daily routine is condo-school-condo. He get everything done using internet. For example, shopping. Since its modern age, you can even order your grocery online. It's all convenient for him.

But despite that, I still like him. He didn't ignore me when I tried to get close to him. It was not easy. He doesn't even want to see me. He even shut the door in my face that day. At first, I just want to thank him, so I tried my best to reach him.

Jackson helped me to pursue him to accept a dinner with me so I can properly thank him. It all went well. Although, he didn't talk much, but he listen to everything I said without complaining. After that, I continue to get close to him, until I finally realized that I'm in love with him.

He didn't reject me nor accept me. More like, I just assumed that we are going out or rather, I believe we are going out. I mean, if he doesn't like me, he can just reject me, but he didn't. Plus, once every two weeks he will let me in his house to spend a day with him.

Although, we don't do anything. Just watching movie and eating together, but I can consider that a date, right? A house date? I'm not complaining, because that's enough for me. Being able to see him and be with him, it already make me happy.

"Should I drop you at his condo?"

I slightly shook my head. "We don't have any appointment today, so I don't have a reason to go."

He patted my head. "I wonder if you really dating my cousin?" he asked whispering. "I mean, a shut-in guy like him? Aren't you tired? Plus he's not that handsome you know."

I glared at Jackson. He has no right to say ill words to Rion. I know his superior when it comes to looks, but it doesn't mean that Rion is not handsome. He have his own charms... in his own ways.

"I like him the way he is... but I would really love it if he will pay more attention to me."

"Come on, stop sulking. Let's go there. If he asked why, then let's just say it was my idea, okay?"

I CAN'T stop smiling while waiting for Rion to open his door. I'm too excited to meet him. I missed him so much, that I can't hide it. I bet Jackson probably can see it on my face that's why he's giving me now a disgusting look.

"Come on, can't you just hide your excitement for a bit?"

"No can do." I rang the doorbell again. "Is he out? It's rare for him to be out at this hour." I used my knuckle to knock. "Rion, Jackson and I are here, are you there?"

"Trying calling h—"

"Wait a second!"

I frowned when I heard a female voice from the inside. "That's a girl, right?" Jackson looked at me with a confused face. I bit my lower lip. "Rion, you better open this door!"

"Please don't shout you're disturbing the neigh—"

"Who the hell are you?!" I clenched my fist. "Where's Rion?"

"Still in be—"

I didn't let her finished. I just shoved her and let myself in. I saw Rion on his bed, sleeping. His upper body was exposed while his lower body was covered by his blanket. I looked at the girl who followed me. She's wearing Rion's bathrobe and looks like she came from the bath.

"Who are you?" the girl asked.

"That should be my line."

"Nikita," Jackson called me. He dragged me out of Rion's bedroom.

"So, you're Nikita? The one who keeps bugging Rion."

"Shut up, Heiz."

"Y-you know her?"

He avoided my eyes. "She was Rion's girlfriend, but that was long ago."

I bit my lower lip to stop myself from crying. "What are you doing here? Rion is not your boyfriend anymore."

"And you? You're not his girlfriend, right?"

"I-I am!" My voice cracked.

She smirked. "But you're not that confident to say it, are you?" She looked at me as if she's looking down on me. "Aren't you the only one who's assuming that you're the girlfriend?"

"Heiz, cut it out!" Jackson stand in front of me as if he's protecting me from Heiz. "Get dress, I'll drop you at your house." Heiz gave me a deadly glare before she head to Rion's bedroom and closed the door.

"I-I should head home. I don't think I can stay here anymore," I said crying. I can't stop it anymore. It's just too painful. I clenched my fist and put it on my chest to put some pressure on it. Hoping that it might help me ease the pain. "Jackson, please let's go."

"But shouldn't you wait to Rion? I bet this is just a misunderstanding."

I tried to give a smile. "But we're not confident, are we? I can't even say that I'm his girlfriend without hesitating. Heiz is right. I'm just assuming that we are going out. I don't even know how he feel about me." I wiped my tears, but somehow no matter how hard I tried to dry them, they just won't stop. "I'm going."

"With that state?"

"I can handle myself. I'm not a kid."

Jackson hold my hand and helped me get out of Rion's place. He didn't talked to me while we are heading to my house. He probably know that I don't want to talk. I kept sighing the whole way.

Who would have thought that Rion have an ex-girlfriend. I thought he doesn't care about the world outside his room. I thought I was the first one who penetrate his shut down world, but I guess I was just one of the bugs that luckily got a peek inside.

I looked at Jackson when I realized that we pulled over. "Why?"

"Rion is calling." He looked at me as if he's asking what he should do. I just shook my head. "Are you sure?"

"I haven't calm down yet. I'm n-not ready to hear what his about to say..."

What if he said that they got back together and I should just let them be? How can I just accept it in this state? Rion didn't reject me, but he didn't also said he likes me. I don't know what I am to him.

I got a head of myself and let the situation overwhelmed me. Maybe he just didn't have the right time to reject me all this time...

THREE days have passed. I didn't received a call or text from Rion. I guessed that's it. He probably think that he doesn't need to explain himself to me. I kept attending school, but as much as possible I'm avoiding him and Jackson. I know their schedules that's why I can adjust my timings.

But know since days have passed, I felt it was all worthless. He probably don't give a damn about me. He probably didn't even realized I was avoiding him. What the hell I'm thinking? I should just focus in other things and move on. If I let myself drown in my studies I'll probably forget him soon.

"Nikita, Jackson is looking for you."

I looked at the door and saw Jackson there. He gave me a faint smile. I thanked my classmate and went to Jackson. "Yo!"

"Do you have class?" I shook my head as answer. "Good, let's talk outside."

I followed him. While we're taking out time walking side by side at the hallway, people started their usual mumbling. Gossiping about us. The past three days were the quietest days for me. Since I haven't been with Jackson, people don't gossip around me, at least I'm not aware to it.

When we reached one of the empty rooms, he let me in first. I looked at him with a confused face. He just give me a smile and give me a sign that I should turn around. I don't know what's happening, but I just followed his instructions.

I saw Rion standing at the back of the room, and in front of him is Heiz sitting. I tried to run, but the door was already closed. I just saw Jackson at the window, guarding the room. I walked backwards towards the door. I just stand there and didn't say I thing.

I don't know what to say to begin with. I mean, what do they expect me to say? They are even together now...

"You know... I already understand. We don't need to talk. I'm not insensitive, you know." I bit my lower lip to stop myself from crying. "Hey, Jackson. Mind opening the door?"

Rion fixed his eyeglasses and looked at me. "What exactly you understand?" I can't exactly see clearly his facial expression due the glasses and he's quite faraway, but base on his tone, he's somewhat angry. "Nikita."

"W-what?"

"What exactly you understand?" He sighed and knocked Heiz' head. "You, you do have something to say to her, right?"

"Who? Me? Why?" she asked continuously. She looked at me with disgust. "I just said what you said. She's bugging you right?"

"Heiz!" Rion called her name firmly. "You bett—"

"I'm sorry, Rion. I'm sorry for bugging you all this time. I'm really sorry," I said crying. I lost energy in my knees that made me slumped on the floor. I hugged my knees and continued to cry. "I promise, I won't bug you anymore. I understand it now. You don't need to force yourself anymore."

"Who's forcing who?" I looked up when I felt his presence in front of me. "You don't understand a thing."

"I'm sorry." I can't stop crying and I'm sorry is the only thing that comes out in my mouth.

I startled when I felt his arms around me. He's hugging me! "Hush now. Let me explain."

I couldn't stop myself. I hugged him back. Tighter than his hug. "I love you, Rion. I really do."

"Then why did you left without hearing my side?"

I buried my face in his shoulder. "B-because what she said is true. I can't confidently said I'm your girlfriend because you never said something about it. You never said you like me too. I don't know where I stand. I'm ju—"

As if my world suddenly stopped when I felt his lips against mine. Am I dreaming? Did I doze off in my class again? I've been dreaming about this for so long. His moist lips is touching mine. This feels so real. If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up anymore.

I felt his warm hands touching my cheeks. "Nikita." I closed my eyes and hold his hands. "Nikita."

"Hmm?"

"Nikita, I like you."

"I like you, too..." Upon realizing what he just said... I opened my eyes and looked at him. He's eyes are looking at me seriously. "Did I just hear you said...?"

"I like you." He hold my hands and help me stand. He looked up at me. "Ah. I hate it when we stand together."

"E?! Why?" I lowered my head and looked at him in the eyes. "You said you like me, but you hate me?" I asked confusedly.

"Because you are way taller than me," he whispered, but I still heard it anyway.

"Are you perhaps insecure about your physical appearance?" His face turned sour and he slightly nod his head. I chuckled and hugged him tightly. "You're so cute," I kissed him in his forehead, "It doesn't matter if I'm taller. I like you because you are you. You might be short, but you are brave. Remember you fought 10 gangster to save me. That's something, okay? It's not just a small thing."

"Don't you have your own insecurities, too?" He pushed me slightly and looked at my eyes. "For someone like you who is beautiful, smart, and kind, I don't get why you get insecure with that trash?" He pointed at Heiz.

"You dated me, jerk!" She sighed and looked at me. "I'm sorry, okay? I didn't plan to pick on you, but I just couldn't believe that he's serious with you."

I glared at her. "And at what basis? How can you say that he is not serious with me?"

"Because that guy never talk about the girl his dating to others, but he kept on talking non-stop about you. Even he said he was so annoyed because you are too clingy, but still he talks it with a smile and he even laugh. Seeing that guy laughing is seriously rare, even his brother creep out when he saw it."

"Shut up."

"Rion is not easy to deal with, but still take care of him, okay? He's a hard headed, but still he's a sensitive person. He will not say the things he wanted to say, you need to figure it out yourself."

"T-thank you." I pouted when I realize how little I know Rion. Hearing this things coming from her ex-girlfriend... I pity myself.

He patted my head. "Stop pouting. We have tons of time to get to know each other," he scratched his head, "Honestly, I really like you. I watched you from afar. That day too. That's why I was able to save you that day because I happened to be behind you." He looked me in my eyes. "I couldn't say it because I always thought that your like might be different from my like. I saved you, you think I'm sort of a hero. What if you like me because of that and not because of who I really am?"

"B-but..."

"That's why I let you see me in my real world. I showed you the real me. I always thought, will she still like me if I'm like this? Will she come to see me if I refuse to go outside with her? I kept asking those kind of questions. I doubted your feelings... myself. I'm not the same guy as Jackson. I know that all you exes was like him. I looked at myself at the mirror and pity myself, asking why I'm not tall? Why I'm not as attractive as the others? I don't care about those things before, but when I think about you, my little confidence will fade into thin air. All the reasoning is gone. I will ended thinking I'm not enough."

My tears started falling again as I hugged him. I kept on kissing his head. This guy. I never thought that's how he think about himself. They are more of him than in what he think.

"You silly. If you like me from the start, you should've said it. You are more than enough. Who cares about the physical aspect? I dated them not because they are handsome, it's because they are kind and respectful." I pushed him a little and looked at him in the eyes. "I like you not because you saved me. Well, it's given. I still think you're my hero, but that's not all of it, because I got to know you. I got interest in you. You are different to others. You have your own little world... in that little world I want to be with you. I want to be with you because I love you."

He turned his face away. "Yeah. Okay. All right."

I smiled when I saw his ears turned flush red. "You're so cute."

He glared at me. "I'm not cute!"

"Hai. Hai," I said as I hugged him again. Yes. Yes. "Can I go to your condo everyday now?"

"Can't help it, right? I still don't want to play outside."

Here I thought, will be making progress, but I guess, I still need to keep up on his own pace. I sighed. "It's good thing that my love for you is not that weak." I gently patted his head and I tighten my hug. "I will make sure you will adjust in my pace too. Let's work hard together."

We walked out the room holding each other's hand. People are looking at us, but who cares? We're in love, and I want to show it to the world. I want to widen his world so we can meet half way. I'll show them that I love him more, so he won't feel insecure anymore.

I stopped and slightly scratched my head. "Rion, I think we forget something in the room. Should we head back?"

"You two." We both turned our backs and saw Heiz and Jackson following us. I can see Heiz' veins in her face. She looked really pissed, while Jackson is just grinning. "The hell you two get to your own little world and forget about us?!"

I just smiled and dragged Rion. I don't care about anyone right now. I'm happy, so the hell with the world... I mean... just for a while. Just for a while... let us be.