Heyo Edgelings!
Dying Sanity AU (Pt.6)
Forgot to mention last chapter but my school started back a week ago. I'm going to do my very best during the school year to stick to my normal schedule, but if there's a week I don't post, don't panic because it's probably just me being overwhelmed by school work.
Anyways... This is my most popular AU by far, so I'm just going to devote the next few weeks to it and tie up all the loose ends. I've finally got an idea of how this could end, so I'm excited for that and all the other little mini-plots I have planned!
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Aaron woke up laying on his mat on the floor, momentarily confused as to why he wasn't in the small linen closet he stayed in at Amelia's. Oh... that's right... This is Bryce's place. Aaron gently stretched, feeling very stiff and slightly sore. Why was he sore again? Oh right... he walked several miles in the pouring rain last night...
"Surprised you didn't wake me up with your screaming last night," Bryce mumbled groggily. He was already up, sipping on some black coffee as he leaned on his tiny excuse for a kitchen counter.
Aaron winced at the rather backhanded comment, "I've... been having less of those..."
"What even caused them? Are you ever just gonna spit it out?" Bryce demanded.
Aaron shuddered, instantly struggling to suppress flashbacks. His eyes glazed over as he concentrated on fighting his own mind to prevent his body from breaking down along with it. A battle he was getting better at winning, but it was never easy.
Bryce rolled his eyes and sighed, mumbling under his breath, "Guess not," then in a louder tone he addressed Aaron again, "Where were you even going last night?"
It took Aaron a minute to register that Bryce said anything, "...what?"
"Nevermind," Bryce huffed in exasperation, not having the energy this early in the morning to push further. "C'mon, I've got to get to work."
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The day passed just like any other day with Bryce, though Aaron did wish he had some of that origami paper from Amelia's place. He didn't mind sitting in the dark, sterile-smelling closet all day, he just kinda wished he had something to fiddle with. He tried to fold the cleaning cloths but they didn't stay in the right shape, they were too floppy.
Eventually the hours ticked by and Bryce shooed his co-worker out before giving Aaron the all-clear. The bright LED lights initially blinded Aaron as he stepped out of the closet, grabbing the broom on his way.
He smiled softly as he swept, enjoying the feeling of getting things clean. It was soothing, therapeutic almost.
Neither him nor Bryce said anything as they cleaned, there was always tension between the two, most of it coming from Bryce's underlying animosity towards Aaron, but also because of Aaron's fear of Bryce. At first Aaron didn't even realize this tension existed, but as he spent more time with Bryce it became more and more obvious to him.
Bryce's anger was still largely a mystery to Aaron. He couldn't fathom why Bryce would hate ONE, Aaron's pride and joy, his very own creation, so much. Aaron smiled at the nostalgic thought of his very own tiny planet, of the clouds and the trees he placed there, of all the years he spent with the sole purpose of creating a game made for others to enjoy.
He really didn't make the Plane for himself, no, he made it for others. He just didn't understand why Bryce didn't like it, and it hurt Aaron to think that Bryce wasn't happy with the world Aaron made for him and the other contestants.
He just wanted to know why.
Maybe Bryce hated ONE because he got eliminated early... but he got to rejoin so that shouldn't be it. Maybe it was because Aaron hadn't been able to continue it? That wasn't really Aaron's fault, but it did make him feel some sense of guilt. He hadn't been able to give the winner the prize he had promised.
What if Bryce had won? Or would it have been Amelia or one of the others?
Aaron smiled brightly as a wonderful idea crossed his mind.
Maybe he could fix it.
He didn't know how the season would've ended, but he only had contact with two of the contestants anyways, so to be fair he would need to include them both. But he didn't have access to his computer anymore, which would make everything harder...
"Hey Bryce...?" Aaron abruptly asked, pausing mid-motion as he wiped down the tables.
"What?" Bryce didn't look up from where he was washing the dishes.
"If you could... wish for anything... what would it be?"
Bryce momentarily paused, his gaze growing distant for a millisecond. He had a brief flashback to the day he got the dreaded phone call from the emergency squad. On that day his life lost all meaning. He quickly shoved the memory back into the corner of his mind, where it had been rotting him away for years. He refocused on the dishes, clenching the rag tightly and swiping at the dirty pizza tray furiously in an attempt to distract himself. His eyebrows furrowed and he remained silent.
Aaron stared at him, unperturbed, patiently waiting for an answer, that same gentle smile still on his face.
"What are you staring at!?!" Bryce snapped viciously, his violent movements sloshing the dirty, soapy sink water all over the counter and floor.
Aaron's smile instantly disappeared and he shivered at the malicious tone of Bryce's voice. "Did you... hear... me...?" Aaron asked cautiously.
"Yeah, and what's it matter to you?" Bryce muttered, sounding more frustrated than angry this time, covering his internal anguish with a fierce facade.
"I just... I wanted... I wanted to give you something..." Aaron offered, his tiny smile growing again. Maybe Bryce wouldn't be so angry all the time if Aaron gave him a gift.
Bryce paused again, casting Aaron a questioning glance. Suddenly it clicked in Bryce's mind. The very first day on the Plane... the promised prize for first place... a wish for anything... Bryce sneered and had to mentally restrain himself from the strong urge to throw the metal tray at that stupid grin on Aaron's face. How dare he?!?! How dare he suggest that ONE meant anything?!?! How dare he think that Bryce would want anything from him?!?!
But the memory of running through the rain last night kept Bryce from unleashing his anger once again...
Barely...
Instead he sent Aaron a nerve-chilling glare and spat, "I want my sister back. Make that happen and I might accept your terrible attempt at an apology."
Aaron's brows knit in confusion. Bryce's sister? He didn't remember that... "Is...is she the one...in the... picture... on your wall?"
Bryce hissed in barely restrained fury, "Yes."
Aaron opened his mouth to ask where she was so he could go get her, but something about the look on Bryce's face warned him not to continue.
"Just keep cleaning," Bryce snapped, frustrated with himself for making more of a mess by splashing the dirty water everywhere.
Aaron nodded and resumed sweeping, but remained deep in thought, wondering how he could find Bryce's sister to bring her back.
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She had been his everything.
Bryce never remembered his father, but sometimes Stella would tell stories about him. When she was younger, Mom and Dad got along really well, always hugging and laughing and spoiling their daughter. They had good jobs, a good house, and a good life.
Stella said that Dad would bring her a little trinket every week. She said he would play the funny face game with her and they would both end up rolling on the floor with laughter. Stella would always say she loved him.
But then, after Bryce came along and finances became more stressed, things started to change within the once happy family. Mom and Dad started fighting every once in a while, and there was always an air of tension. Soon the arguments were an almost everyday occurrence, and they became nastier as time went on.
Paycheck this, debt that. It was almost always about money.
Often the arguments would end with Dad storming out the door, and he wouldn't come back for hours, sometimes a whole day. It didn't take long for Mom to figure out where he was going.
When he couldn't stand the stress of life at home, he went to someone else's for the night to find comfort there. It was so much easier.
This made her livid, she called him a traitor, and with tears in her eyes screamed at him to leave and never come back. Bryce remembered that argument, even though he had only been around four at the time. After all, it was the last time he ever saw his father.
Stella was crushed by this, by the fact he could just walk away from them, from her, without a second glance. For almost a year she kept saying 'he'll come back, you'll see' but he never did. And he never would. That man never knew how much pain he caused his fourteen year old daughter.
His wife didn't take to it very well either. She spent the whole night screaming and sobbing and throwing things and ripping pictures off the walls and clothes out of the dressers. Anything that belonged to him was immediately thrown away. Bryce remembered hiding in his room and crying because of all the scary loud noises. Stella came in and sat on his bed with him, hugging him and crying with him.
For the next few weeks, Mom desperately tried to make ends meet, working overtime and late nights and doing anything she possibly could to keep the house. But none of it was enough.
The house foreclosed in a couple months, becoming property of the bank. They were homeless for a few days, before mom found a run-down house at the far end of a low-income suburban neighborhood. Bryce had been terrified of that old house, all his friends stories of haunted houses flying free in the dark shadows that lay at every turn of the dank, musty smelling place.
Stella would come and stay with him every night until he fell asleep, telling him stories and singing in her sweet, quiet voice. Mom was always at work.
But she couldn't keep it up forever.
The sorrow of being betrayed by the love of her life, the weight of taking care of two kids alone, the stress of working all the time with barely any sleep... It all built up, and pretty soon, she snapped.
She would scream and yell at Bryce, sometimes even trying to hit him. Shrieking that it was all his fault. Sobbing that everything had been perfect before he came along. Screeching about how he looked just like his pathetic father.
Five-year-old Bryce was scared. He didn't understand most of what was happening; he was simply terrified. He didn't know why Mom was so mad at him. He didn't know what he did wrong. He just wanted everyone to be happy again.
Stella always tried to stand up for him, often distracting Mom long enough for him to slip away and escape to his room or go outside. Stella would always come and comfort him afterwards, telling him that Mom was just stressed, that she wasn't really mad at him. Stella told him that everything would be ok.
Stella was always there for him.
It wasn't long before Mom lost her job, she fell asleep on the job one too many times, not to mention her new vicious, sleep-deprived attitude. Now she was at home all the time, which was even worse for Bryce.
She would break into hysterics late at night, waking Bryce up with her crazed laughing and crying. If she was in a good mood, she would yell at Bryce to get away anytime she saw him. She couldn't stand being in the same room as her son. If she was in a bad mood, she would refuse to let him leave, screaming and sometimes even beating him despite Stella's best efforts to protect him.
Before long they were once again under the threat of becoming homeless. Mom couldn't find a job anywhere. She wasn't sleeping, she was barely eating, and she acted deranged most of the time. Stella had to step up and get a job to help pay the rent.
The only downfall to this is now she wasn't home after school to protect Bryce from their mother's wrath.
It got so bad that Bryce wouldn't go inside after school. He would either play in the tiny yard or walk to a nearby park playground and wait for Stella to come home. Even if he was hungry, even if he was thirsty, even if it was freezing outside, six-year-old Bryce would do anything to get away from Mom.
Mom was his enemy, and Stella was his saving angel.
One day, Bryce and Stella walked in and realized that Mom wasn't home. They waited for hours with unease, not sure what to do if she didn't come back. Stella had a job and was almost old enough to drive, but it still wasn't legal for them to live alone. Someone would report them eventually.
But Mom did come back. It was late at night when she stumbled in the door, drunk beyond reason.
And she wasn't alone.
In the morning, he left, and Mom walked out of her bedroom with a wad of crumpled cash. She immediately took that money and spent it on liquor, saying it was the only thing that made her feel better.
It soon became routine. Bryce would get off the bus and walk into an empty house, Stella would come in later that evening, then finally Mom would come back, always drunk and almost always with a stranger. The only good news about this new development was that Mom wasn't around as much and she was at least contributing a little to the rent.
The years passed by from there, and even when Stella turned eighteen, she didn't move out. She had a job, she had a car, she had friends. The only reason she stayed in that dilapidated place was to take care of her little brother. She was the true mother figure in Bryce's life.
She took him everywhere. To friends' houses, to sports practice, to go get ice cream if she happened to get a bonus. She never missed a single game. No matter what, Stella was always there for Bryce when he needed her. She was his everything.
Even after he graduated and finally moved out of that old house full of strangers, him and Stella stayed close. They hung out everyday, talking about what their plans were. Stella was content with her current job, she had been promoted a couple times and was friends with most of her coworkers. She was dating someone, and had been for about two years. They were getting pretty serious, and Bryce liked the guy, so he was supportive. He was nothing like Bryce's father.
Bryce had big dreams. He wanted to go to college and be a nuclear engineer. He wanted to solve the energy problem and change lives. He got accepted into a fairly nice college earlier that year and was going to get government funding to help with his student loans. Classes would start in a few months, and he couldn't wait.
Life was pretty nice now. He was away from his mother and all the bad memories. Bryce was finally out of the woods and ready to live his life to the full.
But then came the day that Stella didn't show up at the cafe.
Then came the call from the emergency squad...
They said they did everything they could...
But the crash had been too severe...
Stella was dead.
And that's when Bryce's world dissipated into oblivion.
The rest of the day, he was numb. He didn't answer the phone, not for anyone. He went to his apartment, laid in bed, and stared at the ceiling. It wasn't real. It wasn't true. He would wake up any minute now.
He never woke up.
For the next few weeks, he lived in a haze. He didn't go to work. Didn't leave his apartment. Didn't talk to anyone. Didn't eat. Didn't drink. Didn't sleep for any extended period of time.
Eventually the walls inside him broke down and he finally fully realized...
Stella wasn't coming back.
Never.
He sobbed. He sobbed his heart out for the entire day, screaming and throwing things and punching walls. He sobbed until his throat was hoarse and his eyes were dry and his fists were bloody and his body was shaking from weakness.
Stella didn't deserve this.
SHE DIDN'T DESERVE THIS!
She was the kindest person Bryce had ever known.
She was so much better than him.
If she couldn't live the life she dreamed of...
Then neither would he.
In the coming months... he never showed up for his college classes, he cut off contact from all his friends, he isolated himself from the entire world, only going to work so he could afford the apartment.
But the pain didn't dull and it would never go away.
He just wanted to escape it for one second.
So he did the one thing he swore he'd never do.
He went to the one place he swore he would never go.
He became just like the one he had resented his entire life.
Everyday, he went to the bar and drank the pain away. Didn't talk to anyone, except to get into fights. Any and all emotional stability he ever had was thrown out the window, making him very aggressive and volatile when he was drunk, and irritable and generally apathetic when he was sober.
He didn't care.
Bryce didn't care anymore.
Without Stella...
Nothing mattered anymore...
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It was late in the evening when Bryce and Aaron were driving back to the apartment. Aaron was staring out the window, watching the cars whizz by in the dim dusk light, listening to the guitar solo playing through the low-quality car speakers. Bryce was driving on auto-pilot, his mind engrossed in memories, freshly reopened wounds of the past.
The song that came on next was one of Bryce's favorites, and he found himself absentmindedly singing along. Without Bryce realizing, Aaron joined in as well, and they began a duet along with the original singer.
~A heart that's full up like a landfill~
~A job that slowly kills you~
~Bruises that won't heal~
~You look so tired, unhappy~
~Bring down the government~
~They don't, they don't speak for us~
~I'll take a quiet life~
~A handshake of carbon monoxide~
~And no alarms and no surprises~
~No alarms and no surprises~
~No alarms and no surprises~
~Silent, silent~
~This is my final fit~
~My final bellyache with~
~No alarms and no surprises~
~No alarms and no surprises~
~No alarms and no surprises, please~
~Such a pretty house~
~And such a pretty garden~
~No alarms and no surprises (get me out of here)~
~No alarms and no surprises (get me out of here)~
~No alarms and no surprises, please (get me out of here)~
Suddenly, the phone rang. Bryce glanced down and saw Amelia's name on the screen. A small grin graced the troubled soda bottle's face. Amelia would never be Stella, but she was the only person after the accident that he ever really cared about, the only person he let himself truly care about. Maybe talking to her would help distract him.
He answered the call and put the phone on speaker, "Hey Amy, wassup?"
"Bryce! I've got some good news!" Amelia's voice crackled through the phone speaker, she sounded excited. Bryce could clearly picture the bright smile that must be on her face right now.
"Really? And what's that?"
"You know Chaya, right? The tea cup who works the front desk?"
"Yeah, you've mentioned her."
"I think she found a job for Aaron!"
At the sound of his name, Aaron snapped out of his distant haze and glanced down at the phone. "...what?"
"You're on speaker." Bryce explained, "I'm driving home."
"That works," Amelia continued, "Anyways, she said that she has a friend who's trying to start up a local electronic repair store. He's got a couple people hired already, but he needs some more to vary shifts."
"Electronics?" Aaron asked in a rhetorical fashion, trying to process.
"He doesn't have any sort of official training or license or anything. I'm pretty sure those kind of guys need something like that." Bryce offered up one of the many issues that came to mind.
"I said the same thing to Chaya, and she said she would talk to him and see if he would make an exception since Aaron is so good with computers and stuff."
"Huh..." Bryce contemplated. If Aaron got a job then he could get his own place, and then Bryce and Amelia wouldn't have to be responsible for him anymore. "Won't he have to do an interview or somethin'?"
Amelia sighed, "Yeah, that's what I wanted to talk to you about... We should probably do some mock interviews with him to prepare him so he doesn't completely bomb it."
"That does make sense... when were you thinking about meeting up?"
"I dunno, anytime should do. You off this weekend?"
"Yeah... you want to meet up tomorrow?"
"Sure, my place?"
"Works for me. How was your day?"
"Pretty good actually! Today is my second day completely off the meds. I actually slept about five hours last night, but had a headache all day. Still, we're getting somewhere, the withdrawal is hitting really hard though."
"That's awesome!" For once Bryce sounded genuinely excited about something, he had been worried for a while about how much medicine Amy was taking. He was glad she was making an effort to not depend on it entirely.
"How was last night by the way? Did Aaron have any spells?" Amy asked.
"Uh..." Bryce stalled for a moment, not really wanting to explain the whole 'running away' ordeal right now, "No, he was fine."
"Good! That'll make three days in a row without one, at night at least. Progress."
"I suppose so..." Bryce agrees rather unenthusiastically.
Amelia knew exactly why he was hesitant, "Hey, we are almost through it. It'll be fine, ok?"
"I just... I don't know..." Bryce sighed, "It makes me feel weird to think that we're helping him." Bryce shot a glance at Aaron, who had been listening in silence.
"I get that, but if it gets our lives back on track it will be worth it right?" Amelia sounded optimistic.
"Right," Bryce tried to match her pleasant tone, but couldn't help but sound uneasy, "See you tomorrow?"
"See you then!"
"Bye Amy."
"Bye Bryce!"
There were a few moments of silence after Bryce hung up the call, before Aaron glanced over and asked, "Does... she know...?"
"About what?"
"About... about your debt... and... about you not keeping... your apartment?"
"Shoot..." Bryce mumbled under his breath. He forgot he told Aaron about that last night. He knew Amy wouldn't willingly take the money he offered her, so deposited it directly into her account without her knowing. They made their bank accounts together, therefore he knew the password. "No she doesn't."
"...oh..." Aaron didn't really have a follow up; he was just curious after he heard Amelia say, 'get their lives back on track'.
"Don't tell her." Bryce demanded, sounding harsh. His brows were furrowed as he thought of his own rather hopeless future. It would all be worth it as long as Amy was happy and had her life back together.
"...ok..." Aaron consented meekly, not really knowing why Bryce was so adamant about it.
To some extent all three of them were coming to a new point in their lives. Amelia was winning her battle against medication dependency, Aaron was going to try to get a job for the first time in who knows how many years, and Bryce was surrendering as his life fell apart, content to be helping the only person who mattered to him anymore.
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Lol this is going to take forever. I was planning on writing about Aaron practicing his interview for this chapter, but then my brain was like, "Let's insert Bryce's fricking long backstory right here!" and I was like "What a lovely idea!" Heh, I don't really mind, but this AU is going to take literally FOREVER to finish. I kinda like it that way though; I don't want to rush it.
Also... I have a big question for you guys...
What do you think of Bryce x Amelia?
I've considered it a couple times for this AU, but haven't been really sure about it. What do you guys want? Do you want it to stay platonic or go a bit further? I don't write much romance so it won't go in depth even if it is an official ship. The most I would specify is cuddling or maybe them moving in together. It won't alter the story either way, just let me know!
Edgy out!
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