Stan's POV

No no no no NO! The thought repeated through my mind as I left the hospital. My Super Best Friend for so much of my life, had basically just told me he was gay and... I just walked away. The one time I should have stayed. I wasn't sure what I could have done but deep down I was glad his parents came and had an excuse to leave.

That filled me with immense guilt. That, and the fact what he said had struck home with myself. Once the pieces clicked I had been so shocked all I could manage was "What the hell"? Like really? Was there anything worse I could say!?

However I was glad to be away for the time being. It would let me get my thoughts straightened out before seeing him again. Damn, was he ever cute though. It broke my heart every time to see him in that state at the hospital but I still went to see him every day, hoping to make his time a little better.

I continued to walk all the way to my house turning things over in my head. I suppose I shouldn't be that surprised but for the longest time I thought I was the only one besides Tweek and Craig. I was so ashamed of these feelings towards my best friend of all the people out there. I didn't want to wreck anything so I simply did everything I could to convince myself that I was NOT gay.

Obviously that didn't go well. For all my convincing myself that most friends get overly excited or nervous, that most friends would maybe hold hands for a minute, most friends would look at the others soft red curls, those damned amazing green eyes, the... Goddamnit. Goddamn everything about Kyle!

By now I was at my house and it was getting a little later than usual dinner time when I walked in my mom was just finishing cooking. I shut the door and didn't realize how cold it actually was outside until I was in the warm air again.

"Hi mom. Where's dad at today?"

"Hey there! I was just finishing making stir fry," she answered happily before adding in a slightly darker tone. "Your dads at the bar."

I sighed. Same response as usual I guess. Dad wasn't around too much, just enough we knew he was alive and to give us shit about school and everything else. Mom called Shelly downstairs and we all sat at the table together.

We ate in mostly silence, though we did have the occasional small talk. For once I was glad because I didn't really feel like talking very much. At the end I grabbed everyone's plates and put them in the dishwasher before calling out as I ran up the stairs, "I'm going to do my homework!"

"Alright! Just don't be up too late doing it."

I closed the door softly and sat in the edge of my bed, drew up my knees before placing my chin on my hands. I pondered for a while, truly hung up on this idea that Kyle was homosexual and over the course of that night I finally admitted to myself that I, too, might be gay.

I lay on my back facing the ceiling. I cried a bit, for no particular reason other than maybe the sense of relief I felt. I quickly became worried about my parents. I suddenly shot upright in my bed fully having come to a sudden understanding. The fact Kyle confided in me meant I could tell him as well and apologize at the same time, right? He would hopefully understand.

I decided I would go to his house tomorrow and tell him that I was sorry I just left. I'd also explain what I realized tonight. All I could do was hope he would still be friends with me.