I loved the smell of grilled cheese. Taking a deep breath, I flipped the sandwich on the stove. It wasn't the fanciest dinner, but Alex probably wouldn't mind. There were ways to jazz it up, though. In our fridge and pantry were apples, peanut butter, cucumbers, and salsa.

We seriously needed to go shopping. Just as I pulled out an apple, the doorknob twisted. My boyfriend was home.

"Hey!"

He was beaming as he tossed his work bag onto the couch then stepped into the kitchen. Growing up, he'd always dressed pretty simply. In university, it was more stylish with slender button-ups, cardigans, and slim leg pants. Now that he'd started work, he was still wearing dark colors but prints we're making an entrance as well as pointy-toed shoes. I guessed he was trying to fit into the yuppie scene.

"Welcome home."

We exchanged grins. "I love this," Alex finally gushed, speaking my thoughts.

"Do you love my apron?" I held out my arms so he could get a clear view of the text on the front: Kiss the Cook.

He did just that. "It's dorky. I love it."

"What else do you love?"

Onto my hint, he twisted his face, but the smile was still there. "Burnt grilled cheese?"

"Shit!" The sandwich I'd forgotten about was charred on one side. "If I stick some apples inside, it will cut down on the bitterness," I suggested while transferring it to a plate.

"So, how was your psychiatry appointment?"

"It went fine. Dr. Roman said he doesn't want to change my meds if they're working for me."

"Are you sure you don't want to schedule a therapist too?"

"I don't need one anymore." I kept telling everyone that therapists weren't necessary if you were doing well. "How was work?"

"Like usual." Alex shrugged. "As an editorial assistant I'm literally just assisting, but it's going well. I give it a year."

I glanced over as I prepared the cucumber grilled cheese. "Give what a year?"

"The position before they promote me."

Alex always knew his strengths and his confidence was beautiful. "You think they'll promote you in a year?"

"I'm good at what I do. They'll soon realize my talents go to waste just being an assistant..." He put a cucumber slice into his mouth. "What about you? How's work?"

"Fine." That was maybe an overstatement. When I'd started applying to jobs in Toronto, I made sure they all dealt with photography. Getting my degree was hell so no way was I going to make it all go to waste doing something like retail or a call center. I was working with an online gift seller who wanted very specific photographs. There wasn't much room for creativity so the job wasn't exciting. But at least I was getting paid and contributing to the household. "We need to go grocery shopping."

Alex looked at his phone. "Do you want to go tonight?"

"But we don't get paid until Friday."

"Yeah, so we can use the credit cards today."

"Uh, sure."

"And we need to finish filling out our financial planner... That was a heavy sigh."

I didn't even realize I'd sighed. "It's okay. I'm just a little tired."

"You weren't tired before I started talking about money," he remarked.

"Try this cucumber one."

Alex gave me a look for changing the subject but bit into the cucumber grilled cheese anyway. His expression perked up as he chewed. "That's not bad at all."

I pointed to my apron and received another look, this time accompanied with an eye roll. Nonetheless, he pecked me on the lips. "I have my hands full with you, Liam Santos."

Shopping with my boyfriend was such a simple yet exciting thing. I made sure we held hands as we walked up and down the aisles.

In the grocery store was the Alex I knew. No gluten-free, organic, GMO-free brands. He was raised by his mother and grabbed whatever was cheapest but didn't look like shit.

"Did you know Riley cooks?" I asked as we held hands by the meat.

"Yes?" Alex raised an eyebrow. "He brought all that food to our housewarming."

"Right, well," I picked up some ground turkey, "he cook-cooks. Like, he's practically a chef. Self-taught too."

"Yeah, I know."

My body tensed. "Anyway, I was thinking of winning your heart through your stomach."

Alex was quiet so I looked over. His brow was still raised. "Okay, honey," he began hesitantly. "Why don't you stick to what you know? Like, weird grilled cheese. Riley has been cooking for years. We also don't have the money for the fancy ingredients he uses."

I rolled my eyes and began to walk towards the cheese. "Okay, fine, whatever."

"Baby, I'm happy you're interested in something new, but we can't really afford to experiment. Let's just keep things simple for now?" He grabbed my hand. "When we live in our big penthouse, you can make all the quinoa-stuffed pork loins you want."

I glanced back with a small smile. "That is... very specific." Alex pursed his lips and I kissed them. "Simple for now. Like cucumber grilled cheese."

"Like cucumber grilled cheese." He pecked my lips.

***

Having stared at Alex's sleeping face for five minutes, I was only slightly disappointed when he woke up. The disappointment quickly passed as he smiled and I realized I could finally interact with that face.

"What are you doing?" he asked, groggily.

"Watching you sleep." Thinking about how much I adore you.

Alex's smile turned apprehensive. "Seriously?"

I rested my cheek on my hand as I muttered, "I did it when we were kids too. I didn't think there was anything weird about it then." I didn't think anything I did involving Alex was weird---not until someone else said it was. "I'm sorry."

He propped himself up on his elbows, frowning. "What are you sorry about? Being Edward Cullen?"

I wasn't sure what he was referencing and answered seriously. "I didn't know what I felt as a kid, but looking back, it isn't much different to now. I still really like staring at your face as you sleep."

Alex kissed my lips briefly and I didn't really care about morning breath. Clearly, neither did he.

"I wish everyone could understand how much I love you."

A sweet smile showed itself to me. "They do. They just have to get used to your love being a little different now."

I sighed, lying down on my back. "I don't understand how it's different. The only difference now is that we have sex. And I want to kiss you."

Alex snorted. "Dork."

That might as well be my pet name, honestly. "Speaking of dorks," I side-eyed him coyly, "we need to stock up on 20 hours' worth of popcorn."

Alex jumped out of bed and squealed. "Pop Tarts or frozen waffles?"

"Both?"

*

"I kind of like the soap flavour."

Alex shuddered. "I'll stick with marshmallow."

We were five hours into our Harry Potter movie marathon as we split a pack of Bertie Botts.

"Sausage," Alex announced as he spit out the jelly bean into our Nasty Jelly Bean Cup. "I swear to god, Malfoy has the hots for Harry."

"Stooooop," I begged. I did not understand that ship. "I think Harry should've stayed with Cho."

Alex pshawed. "She's too good for him." He smacked on a jelly bean with attitude. "Not that the film did her book character justice. There are so many low-key moments of sexism in the books—"

"Can we please, not?"

He shrugged his shoulders in resignation. "Fine." His head rested on my shoulder. "You know, I actually haven't been watching for the past fifteen minutes."

"Hm?"

"I've been thinking about how happy I am to be with my best friend."

My face heated, cheek muscles tensing.

"How much I love you," he added as he sat up and straddled my lap, scooting our lower halves close together.

I glanced down. It didn't take a genius to know when Alex wanted to do it. His gaze changed and his touches were way more erotic. I leaned forward and nipped his neck, causing him to whimper and push himself against me.

Unlike me, in our years apart, Alex had gained experience; he knew what he wanted and what he liked. In my desire to satisfy him, I'd secretly researched techniques and tips, and stepped outside of my box. My initial discomfort had vanished immediately because when Alex was feeling good, I was over the moon. I was the one giving him pleasure. He was mine now and no one else's.