CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Memories in the Making

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"Screw them, let's go swimming." One of the other guys stood up and took off his shirt. He tossed it to the side and the girls giggled childishly.

"Hell yeah!" Malik quickly stripped down to his swim trunks, encouraging the girls to do the same.

Almost as soon as his shirt was off, he stumbled forward and scooped up a blonde girl into his arms. He raced to the water, gracefully, of course, and fell into the waves with her. She screamed above the sounds of the ocean crashing against the sandy shore.

I watched as, one by one, the group stampeded the water like an army of drunken fools. But I couldn't bring myself to join. I didn't have any shorts, and I sure as hell wasn't about to strip down to my boxers. Instead, I stayed back and scoured the circle of chairs for alcohol. Finding a cooler on the opposite side of the fire, I dug through it and pulled out a nice, cold beer.

I sat down and drank by myself in silence. The laughter and splashing water felt distant, muffled, as if it were behind glass. I was already drunk before, but I felt myself finally relax, sighing as if I'd been holding my breath for a long time. I couldn't tell how long I sat there. Time, and my vision, blurred.

Next thing I knew, I found myself standing at the edge of the water, watching everyone carry on, enjoying themselves like there wasn't a worry in the world. Laughter echoed across the water–shouts, cries of joy, and even the occasional scream of mock terror.

Malik somehow ended up face down in the water for longer than he should have, causing the group to panic. My heart jumped from my chest, but I was the first to scramble over to him.

When I called his name, he sat up, coughing and laughing, brushing it off like it wasn't a big deal. We dragged him out of the water, forcing him to sit out for a while, making sure he sobered the hell up before he actually drowned himself.

"Come on, Markus! Just take off your clothes!" The girls pressed, jumping up whenever a wave came in and splashed against their backs. I shook my head when I felt someone push me from behind. Glancing back, I saw Malik standing there with an evil grin, plotting something.

"What are you doing?" I frowned.

"Stop being lame and get in the water, man," Malik slurred, stumbling forward and placing a hand on my shoulder.

And then I found myself stripped down to nothing but my boxer briefs. Malik, that other guy whose name I would never remember, and I were all in the water, wrestling each other like idiots. Suddenly, we were all hauling the girls up onto our shoulders, laughing as they tried to knock each other off.

It wasn't so bad. I was drunk, sure, but for once, I was just...present. Messing around with people who, in all honesty, weren't as terrible as I thought. Moments like this didn't come often, and I rarely got to enjoy myself.

But even as I laughed and splashed along with the others, I felt a strange emptiness settle in the pit of my stomach. Like something was missing.

Eventually, I removed myself from the water and stumbled onto the shore with clouded eyes, searching for the embers of what used to be the fire.

It was then that I noticed a petite silhouette standing just beyond the circle of chairs. She was watching us–watching me–as I approached. My heart picked up speed as I recognized her.

"Hey," Lydia murmured, standing there with her hands clasped together in front of her, her voice barely audible over the distant laughter.

I hurried over to her, a little too fast, my chest tightening. Was she hurt? Why did she come back? Did Kyle do something?

"Lydia," I croaked, clearing my throat as I stood in front of her, soaking wet and practically naked. I rubbed the back of my neck, suddenly very aware of how ridiculous I looked. "Sorry..."

She chuckled softly, shaking her head. "No, it's okay! I am glad you are enjoying yourself."

Her eyes slowly drifted from mine, tracing their way down my chest. I wasn't sure what she was looking at—was it the tattoos that covered my body, or did her eyes settle on the scars that also found a home on my body?

I slurred, my tongue fumbling over the words as I spoke, drawing another sweet laugh from Lydia.

"He didn't...hurt you, did he?" I stepped closer and scoured her face for any foreign markings. My hand twitched as it went to reach for her cheek but slowly fell back to my side. "Y-you need to let me... kick his ass."

"No, Markus," she said, folding her arms and looking away quickly. She made it painfully obvious that I needed to shut the hell up. But I didn't want to.

"You can't try and be my friend and then expect me not to say something, Lydia. That's not how friendships work," I grumbled, frowning at her, leaning in close so that she could hear every word I was saying.

"Please, just leave it. I put my trust in you, Markus. You can't tell anyone, you promised. You are just going to make things worse."

I hissed, "Being anywhere near him is making things worse."

She bit down on her lip and shook her head, knowing exactly what I meant. He intended to ruin every interaction between Lydia and me, no matter what she'd say. That thought angered me, the petty side of me demanding that I go against every little thing Kyle wanted, to make his life harder. I grinded my teeth, reminding myself that it would only make things harder for Lydia.

Taking another step closer, I found myself leaning against the cooler to steady my wavering.

"How can you even be with a guy like that?" I said, a thought that should've easily remained in my head.

Lydia snapped her eyes to mine and frowned. I glanced away. It was unfair of me to pass any judgment when she trusted a terrible secret with me.

"You can be a real dick," she mumbled, no humor to be found.

"It's not an invalid question."

In the background, among the crashing water and laughter, Malik yelled for me to return so that they could continue their wrestling match.

I lurched forward and then back, having too much difficulty standing up.

"You should stop drinking," she said, her arms folded. I grabbed at my head, feeling movement in my stomach as my face grew hot.

"Oh, God," I groaned, turning away from Lydia to stare at the ground, hoping the dizziness would go away.

"Are you okay? What's wrong, Markus?" Lydia placed a hand on my arm.

"I-I think I'm gonna throw up–" and as soon as those words escaped, I turned and vomited everything I had consumed that day.

That was the last thing I remembered before blacking out.