Chapter Fifty-Eight

Alice

When I woke up, the weak daylight streaking out around the edges of the curtains, I just lay there blinking my sleepy eyes open and willing my body to wake up. Last night had been a rollercoaster and had not exactly been how I'd expected to spend my seventeenth birthday. I was still digesting it all.

The sound of rain pattered outside the window. I rolled over to look at my phone, I had several messages from Tia and Rachel, both mainly worried about where I'd gone and then telling me about the police turning up at the party and if I'd seen it. I texted them back that I was fine, but I had more to tell them about Owen and me. We agreed to meet up later that afternoon.

I sat up in bed and rubbed at my face, still trying to wake up when Cat came in holding two mugs. She handed me one of them and sat down cross-legged on her bed.

"How do you feel this morning?"

I held the mug between my hands, letting it heat up my palms. "On edge, like I'm waiting for something bad to happen."

"Everything that's happening is good." Cat stretched out lazily on the bed. "He clearly needs help, and now he'll get it. I mean, what he was like last night..." She shook her head as if to clear the memory.

"Yeah, I guess."

Cats phone made a sound and she shoved it underneath her pillow without looking at it. "What do you want to do today," she asked, smiling at me. "I'm completely free if you want to hang out."

I couldn't hear the sound of rain anymore, just the sound of the street waking up. "You know," I said, taking a steady breath. "I think I'm going to go for a run. Maybe we could watch a movie when I get back?"

"Yeah sure." Cat lay down in bed and pulled the covers back over her. "Wake me up when you get back."

I headed outside for my run, still bewildered by Cat's revelation that she was going to take a nap. My feet padded softly against the pavement and as I left our street, I took in the scent of spring like it was my own personal drug.

My parents had made some calls that morning and was starting the process to press charges against Owen, essentially forcing him to keep his distance, I could hear them discussing it as I'd tied my trainers before I left. I tried not to think about what it was going to be like at school Monday morning. People would have questions. They always did, and at this moment I wasn't really sure what I would say.

I didn't feel like a victim, but my family sure thought I was. It felt weird and fake, in fact my whole life had felt like that since the accident. I didn't feel like me. Like I was on the outside watching my body move and talk and live, but it wasn't me.

My pace slowed as a warm feeling of recognition passed over me. I was coming up along the high street where businesses were opening up for the day, and in front of me was a quirky sign advertising their specials.

I knew that café, I'd been there with Tia, and Damien worked there. I paused when I reached the door, wondering if he was inside. I meant to continue my jog. What did I care if he was there?

Something drove me through the door, some weird pull, like that feeling you get when you meet your pet for the first time and just know it was supposed to be. I smoothed my hands over my hair to make sure no stray strands were sticking up in weird positions. Maybe I just needed to see a friendly face.

There he was, stood behind the counter handing change over to a customer, wearing a black apron, his curly hair held back with an elastic band. As the customer left, I stepped forward, having not prepared any words to say to him yet, he seemed stunned yet pleased to see me.

"Hi," he said leaning forward and grinning at me. "Are you here to see me, or did you forget I work here?"

I took a deep breath and returned his grin. "I'm here for the cookies," I said suddenly finding my words coming as though he'd flicked on a tap just by starting up the conversation. "I was passing by and had a craving."

Damien nodded knowingly and wiped his hands down his apron. "Is it to sit in or take out?"

I wound my hair in its ponytail. "Take out please, my sister's waiting for me at home. We're going to watch a movie." I go silent. I didn't know why I'd told him that, it had just kind of come out. I wasn't usually one for oversharing, but he seemed to bring it out in me.

"That's cool," he said, grabbing a paper bag and some tongues, he opened the glass display where the baked goods were kept. "Is two okay then or are you in need of a serious sugar rush?" he asked, clacking the tongues together as he peered at me through the glass.

"Two is great," I said, feeling nervous at his steady gaze on me. He started bagging up the cookies and moved to assist one of the other servers in making some drinks. He seemed like a natural, it was weird knowing that he'd not even been doing this that long. Just since his grandmother had been hospitalised a few weeks ago.

"How is your grandmother by the way?" I asked, as he came back over with the cookies.

"Getting better." He twisted the top of the bag and set it down on the counter. "The doctors say she might be able to come home in a few days, so my grandad is ridiculously excited. It's adorable," he said, a sweet smile forming at his lips.

I felt a funny skittery feeling in my stomach and I gasped quietly in surprise. He handed me the bag, and I automatically reached into the pocket of my hoodie.

"Nah," he said, waving me off. "It's on the house."

I laughed awkwardly. Thank god they were, because I was currently searching for my purse in my completely empty pocket, having come in to buy cookies with absolutely no money on me. "You know you'll run your grandmother out of business if you keep giving away free cookies to strange customers."

He laughed and gave me a wink. "I only give them to the strange customers who are pretty too."

"Gee, thanks." I rolled my eyes, but I'm smiling as I turned to leave.

"Hey erm, you never got in touch," he said, stuttering over his words a little. "How are things with the boyfriend?"

I glanced back at him over my shoulder. He caught me by surprise with that. He was fiddling with the tongues again, one hand clasped behind his neck.

"Oh, it's over," I said, feeling only a tiny hint of sadness at that fact. "So, getting better I guess."

He has the look of a puppy about to go on a walk. "You should drop me a message if you want to chat... or hang out... or just crave some more cookies," he said, letting his hand drop away from his neck. "Assuming you haven't deleted my number already."

"Do you run a special delivery service for the cookies or something?" I said with a grin.

"Well, no," he said, grinning back at me, his eyes twinkling. "I think I could make an exception though."

I laughed as I walked away with my cookies, pausing as I opened the café door. I felt free for the first time in a long time, and it was exhilarating. I drew my gaze toward him, he was still watching me and for some reason that made my heart do a little zing. "I still have your number, maybe you'll hear from me sometime."

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