"Drink!" Lou shouted over the flames, grinning. 

"It'll help you feel better for tonight," She pushed into my hands a large mug that'd been passed around. I held the brew in my hands, giving it a quick sniff. It smelt of sweet alcohol, perhaps wine?

When the night had fallen, we'd gathered around a bonfire. The evening had felt scarily odd. There was chatter, excitement and a few songs that seemed to cause the flames to dance even higher. I'd met more people, and heard more, ankle-deep stories than I thought I ever could've.

I tentatively raised the brew to my lips, the smell fried my nose hairs and I could only manage a quick sip before placing it down again. It was surprisingly sweet but I still choked on the bitter aftertaste.

"Nope," I spluttered, "no more,"

Lou laughed, "You're no fun!" Before taking a massive gulp. I laughed too, the taste turned sweet in my mouth.

"You're very true there!" I shouted back before lapsing into a fit of giggles.

"Come on!" Lou shouted, dragging me from my seat. She propped me up, in what appeared to be an attempt at some like of Spanish dance. Humming the tune as she guided me back and forth.

"What are you doing?" I giggled. I didn't mind, it was fun, however stupid.

Lou spun around, leaving me on the sidelines, incorporating what must've been three different types of dances across forty different centuries. Abandoned to the side, I laughed. The drink was passed into my hands, I took another sip. Lou danced faster, the flames reached higher, more laugher echoed in my ears.

Yes, this was good. This was fun, nothing like at home.

At home.

The thought both sobered and centred me. What was I doing? Standing around and drinking?

Suddenly, the world spun into focus with a wave of jaw-dropping nausea. I didn't feel so good. There wasn't only alcohol in that drink, there was something more.

I found myself caught between wanting to fall into the snow bank and wanting to dance. I could feel invisible music thrumming in my veins but I knew that I was also wildly out of control.

What's happening to me? I wanted to panic but the brew soothed me.

I need to get out.

I need to escape.

Why am I still here?

What am I doing here?

It's okay, just chill out. Tonight is supposed to be a big occasion after all, you can escape once you've figured out where you are. 

You'll die out there, in the snow.

I looked out towards the line of white-capped trees. The banks of snow formed walls that looked like a fortress.

Yeah, I thought. Escape later, you need to gain their trust now. Gain information. Escape later.

The unspoken song in my veins thrummed louder. I turned back to Lou who was in a fit of giggles. Her joy made me laugh.

Escape later.

"Lou!" I laughed, "what are you doing?"

"Ma-ry!" She sung, "oh Mary I'm so excited!"

"For what?" I cried as she swayed her way towards me.

She stopped, "I don't know!" And then burst into a fit of giggles. Okay, that was funny. I laughed with her.

"Novices!" Julian suddenly called, hey, I didn't know she was here. "Time to sleep now! The ceremony starts later tonight and we want you all well rested!"

"Exciting!" Lou crowed, clapping her hands. She grabbed my hand and pulled me inside the building. She led me towards the dorms. By the door, the woman from the kitchens before, held a tray in front of her.

"Take one and drink up!" She grinned. There were a few cups laid on the tray before her.

"Thanks!" Lou squealed, downing the contents with the speed of a shot. I giggled at the display, taking my cup and following Lou inside. "I'm so ready for bed," Lou complained, stumbling forwards. I laughed at the display, taking the dorm in.

Twenty or so beds were lined up in a methodic manner, some spaced in the middle, others on the wall. A large window sent moonlight spilling into the room. It was quickly filling up, the other novices stumbling forwards into their beds.

I giggled. "They're so tired,"

No response from Lou, she'd already fallen onto her bed, not even bothering to let down her tied up hair.

"Lou!" I hissed, suppressing the urge to giggle, "Lou, you're tired too!"

I found my bed between Charlotte and Lou. As she passed me, Charlotte whispered, "Only drink half of it," She pointed to the untouched drink on my bedside table. 

I paused in the process of letting my hair down. Charlotte was staring at me with a frightening intensity. A shaking hand brushed back her hair nervously. She took in a deep breath. 

What did that mean?

Charlotte had been the only one to do this before. I remembered. 

Instead of bursting into a fit of giggles, I did as she said. Almost, instantly, I felt my world grow slower, my vision blurring at the edges. It explained why Lou was out so quickly.

"It's another drug," Charlotte whispered, she was already laying down on the bed so I did too. "They use a lot of drugs like that in this process, supposed to keep you from wanting to escape..."

"People have escaped?" I whispered as lightly as I could. I was fighting to keep my eyes open.

Charlotte looked crestfallen, "Some have tried, they die in the wilderness before they can get far," Her eyes shimmer in the dim moonlight. I'm not sure if they're with tears or not.

She takes in a deep breath, a lock of hair falling in her eyes. "The Ceremony is better called by its other name; The Claiming Ceremony. After we've fallen asleep, the Novices from the men's side will make their way through our dorm. They'll pick someone to be their partner in life; their wife." Now that woke me up from my drowsiness.

"What?" I hissed. Charlotte nodded, a tear falling over her nose and into her pillow. She quickly patted away the trail.

"They'll take them back to their room, since they'll still be asleep from the drugs, and put them in their bed. Sometimes they'll take them, you know? To have their, to be wife in bed- it's a test in lust and discipline, an old folk take for good luck in marriage,"

Wait- what?

It was almost as if I'd never been drugged, my mind was running at a million miles and hour. Soon, there'd be men walking between these beds, picking and choosing with the ease of groceries at the weekly food shop.

The two large doors that'd let everyone in, shut with a firm click.

"Pretend to be asleep," Charlotte murmured; had she drunken too much from the cup? "Don't freak when you get there, it'll be alright,"

She was off, placing her future in the hands of another. Someone, she probably didn't know. I watched her, in shock. How could she sleep at a time like this? 

Sleeping was the last thing that I could do! No wonder why they drugged us. No wonder The Ceremony was such a watertight secret. I'd be in tears and maybe staging a revolution if I'd known a few hours ago!

I took in a few deep breaths stay calm, I reminded myself. It'll be okay, you just need to survive to escape. I could feel my thoughts grow sluggish, fighting my slowing lids became a battle.

Stay awake!

Suppressing the urge to slap myself, I tossed and and fro. Lou was completely out, the end of her ponytail flicked across her face.

Marriage! I was barely out of high school! Yeah, I'd spent a year or so in university, mucking around but that's because I had no idea what I was supposed to be doing with my life!

This wasn't fair.

This wasn't freaking fair.

I didn't want to be married.

"And Marian? Keep your hair down tonight." The memory came to the forefront of my mind. I clenched my pillow. That asshole knew, he knew what was going to happen tonight and he didn't bother to warn me!

I wanted to punch him in the face so bad. My nails dugs into my palm. Oh, he was so going to get an earful whenever I saw him next.

Do you hope he chooses you? 

The uninvited though suddenly popped into my mind, I stilled.

Eli was probably the only guy here who'd shown me any semblance of kindness. I mean, he wasn't too bad looking.

No, I am here to escape. That's all.

My thoughts were slowing again, stuck on Eli. He was nice. It was rich of me to scorn him when I still had his coat around my shoulders.

The doors to the dormitory opened. I froze, shutting my eyes. The shuffle of clothing, moderate steps as multiple people walked around. I heard a whisper, a shuffle of clothing. They neared, through my slitted eyes, I could see multiple figures walking past in the moonlight. Some paused, occasionally two or more would gather around a particular bed. A murmur or two.

Behind me, I heard a shuffle of clothing. It stilled, the other figures filtered out, pausing at various intervals. A press onto the mattress behind me. The sheets on the bed shuffling.

What are they doing? I wondered. The upper fur blanket was wrapped underneath and soon I was lifted off of the bed.

Oh, we're actually going somewhere.

Him, whoever he was started moving. He had a hand under my shoulder and the other under my legs for support. The fur blanket was wrapped warmly around and I felt like I was a bit of a burrito.

It's so you can't escape. A part of me hissed.

Well, at least I'm warm.

We suddenly moved out into the frigid cold. I gasped, freezing up.

He paused. For a second I'd wondered if my cover had been blown. I did my best attempt to look asleep. After a second, he continued.

The trek felt like it took forever, occasionally he'd stumble, sometimes pause. However, we made it to where I guessed his home was. It took a bit of manoeuvring to get inside but eventually we did.

The place was warm, I could feel it on my cheeks. The scent of toast and woodfire was in the air. Through another door and eventually I was laid down on a bed. The linen brushing across my skin. He laid the blankets over me and for a second his hand carelessly brushed against my shoulder. He paused.

After a tense moment, he took a few steps and stopped, sighing.

"I know you're awake,"

For a second, I was going to pretend that I was asleep. Instead in that moment, all the things that he could've done fled through my mind.

I sat up, slowly, he was turned away, standing by the door and looking out. He turned around.

Eli.

I didn't dramatically sigh in relief but I was tempted to. Instead, I managed a steely look. Grabbing the pillow behind me, I threw it with all the anger that I could muster.

"You knew!" I cried, my voice shrill, the pillow hit his shoulder and he flinched away, surprised. "you knew and you didn't bother to even warn me,"

Eli seemed at a last for words. I tore myself out of the bed, storming around barefoot. I searched for something else to throw- a jacket laying on a chair. This time Eli moved but his face remained neutral.

"I have been in a car crash, kidnapped, tortured, interrogated, forced into a cult, I've been frozen and ripped from my home! I have no idea where I am or what's happening. I have no idea what happened to my friend at the crash. I don't know why I'm here or why I should even bother. It seems like I'm being forced into a marriage against my will and I can only imagine what that will include," I cried, letting it all out.

He didn't react, watching me cry out, his eyes house such sincerity that I backed off a little.

"I'm scared," I croaked, "and tired, and cold and I just want to leave and go home," In a moment of defeat, I slump to the floor, pulling myself up into a sitting fetal position, my head resting on my knee. A tear leaked out of my eye and onto the dress.

After a moment, Eli moved. He walked over to the bed and I thought he was going to fall asleep. Instead, he picked up the fur blanket and moved over to me, letting the blanket drape around my shoulders. I drew it closer.

Eli sat before me, almost imitating me in stance; a knee rested with his chin placed on it. Very softly, as if not to spook me, he spoke, "Tell me about your home,"

"What?" I spluttered, wiping away a tear.

"Tell me about your home," Eli repeated, his voice insistent.

Something released within me. All the other Novices had such a tight lipped nature about them that I was afraid of letting anything slip in fear of getting dunked again.

"Well... Uh. It's nice I guess. I'm an Australian citizen so I mostly live there. I live in a portable home on the same land as my family so that's also nice. Summer is always hot, like this arid hot, unescapable heat. Spring is hot too, but it's more of a sticky hot since the humidity always seems to be at a hundred percent. But it's always the start of some amazing lighting storms. Sometimes the power will go out and sometimes the whole house will shake. It's always an exciting event; lighting up the candles because of a power outage,"

A small smile has formed on Eli's face, I'm taking steadier breaths.

"I've always liked Winter and Autumn best. It's cool enough to have a jacket on for most of the day and then Winter is full blown cold which I've always loved. Though it's always super dry during Winter and by the time Spring rolls around, I'm excited for the thunderstorms again,"

"Were you in a more suburban or urban area?" Eli asked.

"We were semi-rural; we had a solid sized property but still close to the city. It was sort of a jungle climate back home. So it was so humid, all the time," It grows silent as I think of home. I was supposed to be travelling, the world at my fingertips. Nothing was supposed to be impossible. I was excited and free I had a loving family who I knew I'd return too... Or at least I'd hoped...

"Why am I here?" I asked, my voice raspy, then cracking, "because all I want to do is go home,"

Whatever progress Eli thought he was making had been shattered. He looked to the ground. "It's hard to explain," Eli's brows furrowed.

"Then please try because I am scared,"

"Ah, well, our community is severely outnumbered..." Eli starts, I don't like where this is going already, "historically, almost a three to one on the male side and since a citizen cannot fully join the community until he's married... There leaves some significant... Gaps."

"So you have to what, kidnap women?"

"No. We usually offer ourselves as a retreat for those who are severely depressed and suicidal. Something about getting back to nature and re-instating a massive technological decrease helps," Eli shrugs. "You were, a special case. We came across the crash and you were bleeding out everywhere. Once we bring someone into our community, well, if the secret got out we wouldn't be able to live our lives as we do,"

"So you brought me here to help me and now I can't leave because you're secretive? What if I promise not to say anything? Can I go then?" The words were sticky in my throat, I was getting choked up again.

"They won't let you leave," 

Wow, Eli shut that down really quick.

"Why?"

"Because no matter how well you lie or cover it up, someone will come looking. Someone will find out, and that's why you can't,"

"That's a stupid answer," I scoffed, standing. I was getting tired, while I'd been able to fight off the drowsiness from earlier, it was pushing harder now that some of the adrenaline had ebbed away. My head spun and for a second I almost stumbled back. Eli was right by my side, his hand on my arm.

"Are you okay?" The concern in his voice was clear.

"No," I grumbled. "I just need sleep, they-."

"It's okay, you sleep here," Eli helped me to the bed, making sure that I didn't fall on my face.

"No it's okay, it's your bed," I was using it now as support, it had a beautiful quilt on it and in a daze, I began to trace the patterns.

"Mary," Eli spoke very seriously, "you're not doing too well, obviously you need the bed more than me,"

A little bit of the drink from before must've been left over because I let out a light giggle and let my head fall forwards on his chest. My vision was swirling.

It was his bed, it didn't make sense that he'd have to sleep somewhere else. 

"You're very nice. You can stay... If you want," I lifted my head and looked at him square in the eyes, "nothing funny though,"

"Of course," There was a small smile on his lips. He probably found this hilarious. Although he did help me into bed. While I traced the designs of the wooden ceiling with my eyes. Eli dressed into a lighter shirt and pants and got into the bed carefully next to me.

A moment of tense silence.

Not the kind in where there's an awkward lapse in conversation and now both parties are deciding wether it's worth to pick up a new topic or go to something else together. No, this was a slightly different moment.

"They drugged us you know," The words slipped from my mouth, I turned and looked to him. His thick lashes framed incredibly deep blue eyes, they were the same colour as the waters of Banff's National parks during the Summer. "At first they gave us some kind of drink that made everything better and funnier. Then when we were going to bed they gave us some kind of sleeping drink."

Eli sighed, "I'm not surprised. Sometimes they have very questionable methods,"

I snorted, laughing into the pillow, "You're going to look me in the eyes and tell that to me?"

Eli winced, a smile on his face. "You got me there,"

I looked to him, then to the ceiling, and then back to him again. "What is this?" I whispered, "I still don't get the point of the ceremony,"

Eli was slow to speak, "The Ceremony is like the guy choosing who he'd like as a partner. Then throughout the training, we'll see each other but you'll mostly at the training facility. If you don't like me, then you have every opportunity to walk away," Eli paused, "Wait, I said that too cheerfully, I hope you don't walk away,"

The sentiment was sweet. 

I turned to look and him and he turned his head to do the same. There must've been only centimetres between us. 

I wanted to tell him that I wasn't going to stay. 

I wanted to tell him that this was unfair and wrong. I wanted to tell him not to start anything because sooner or later it would end.

Instead, I gave a small smile, "That's cute. I need to sleep though," I turned away, making sure that my back was facing him.

I hope you don't walk away.

Great.