Everything ached.

I shut my eyes, trying to stop from trembling. A million times I reached for my phone, my throat closing up when I remembered how I had left things between us.

Gray.

I had never needed him worse.

The thought of him almost broke me down again, too much for my exhausted heart. I knew if he was there he would fix me. Hold me. Love me. I knew everything would be alright. But I had lost him, and every breath was agonizing.

I tried to patch myself up as best as I could, but my weary body hadn't done a very thorough job. I wasn't sure it was even prudent to return to my dorm, but there was nowhere else I could go. Hours past as I tried to sleep, but my exhaustion and pain was far too great. My eyelids burnt as did my heart. I felt lost. Terrified. Alone.

Something inside me told me that in spite of everything if I told Gray what had happened, he would return. But I wanted to be the sole reason for his return, not some crazed psychopath involved in shady business and trying to kill me.

There was a knock on the door and I shut my eyes tighter. I couldn't get myself to stand. I didn't even know who it could be. I glanced at the time and saw that it was two in the morning. The knock was repeated and I got to my feet. I had to be on my guard. I called in a croaky voice. "Who is it?"

"Xavier?"

My heart burnt into ashes. My entire body stood paralyzed. 

Gray.

I hurried towards the door, my body ache increasing with every step. What was left of my heart hammered in my chest. Was I dreaming? Maybe I had died already. I opened the door, my world crashing when I gazed into the familiar emerald. His face was half covered in the shadow. He looked somehow even more handsome than I remembered him. My vision tunnelled and I gripped the door hard to keep from swaying on the spot.

His eyes widened when he saw me. "Xav? What the fuck?" I stepped back to let him in. His hand grabbed my chin as he studied my face intently. I shut my eyes at his touch. Everything would be alright. I knew it would. 

He stroked his thumb on my jaw and I winced slightly. "Xav? What...what happened?"

I bit my lip to keep it from trembling. His touch was breaking me. His voice. His familiar scent. His warmth. How could he no longer belong to me? My throat choked up, my lungs constricted. Now that he was nearer, it was somehow harder to bear the agony.

"Er...I lost your gun. I'm sorry."

He was quiet, his eyes swimming with concern. "Xavier...you're hurt. You're bleeding. Who did this to you?"

I gazed at him, my heart mending. He had come back to me. I didn't know if he was going to stay. But everything that had happened to me over the last few days crashed over me with the force of an avalanche. I was buried. I was terrified he would push me away. 

I took a deep breath, my throat tight as I moved closer to him and buried my face in his chest. He froze for a second and I put my arms around his neck and whispered his name softly. Begging. Praying. Pleading for him. 

"Gray...Grason..."

For a long time, he didn't move, and then, my heart was impaled when his arms enclosed around my broken body and he hugged me close.

 I bit my lip, ashamed of the tears that suddenly arose. He stroked my back gently. The familiarity unhinged my senses. His scent. His chest, rising and falling gently. His arms holding me so protectively. His hands, stroking my back. His hands that had never hurt me. I could feel his beautiful heart beating under his chest. 

He kissed the top of my head and the tears welled and spilt over. "Xaby, what's wrong, love?"

I shattered into a million pieces.

I broke into sobs, my entire body racking. I was pushed to my limits. Physically and mentally exhausted. I just wanted everything to be over. "Gr...Gray..."

"Right here."

I clutched onto his t-shirt. He was there. Firm. Reliable. He was there. 

He led me to the bed, still enclosing me in his embrace and sat down on it. He leaned back against the wall, holding me securely against him as I sobbed into his chest, my heart exploding with a tornado of emotions. 

He was patient like he always had been. Gentle. Tender. He caressed me lovingly and my scars seemed to heal. I finally leaned back to look at him, sniffling like a baby. He cradled my face in his hands and I melted in his touch. He gazed into my eyes, and suddenly the world was better. 

He brushed the tears away from my face and kissed the tip of my nose. "Tell me what's wrong, Xaby? Who did this to you?"

"How...how did you get here?" I asked in a hoarse whisper.

His eyes narrowed slightly in question. "You called me. I couldn't hear anything and then the line cut off."

I stared at him and leaned back to reach for my phone. I gazed at the latest contacts and saw that around eight-thirty, my blind contact had been Gray, not Caleb. 

A silver ran down my back. Caleb was not only involved in shady business with the hospital, but also with Reznick. There was no other way he could've reached the spot unless he was in with the goons. I couldn't understand. If he was with them, why had he saved me? Why hadn't he just let me go to Reznick? He knew my real identity. I was sure he knew about my equation with Reznick as well.

Was it possible that both were connected somehow? Even the Atknisons corporation had something to do with the hospital. It seemed like all three were connected by some invisible, lethal link.

"S...something is wrong, Gray," I whispered, shaking my head. "Something is really really wrong."

He remained quiet as he stroked my bottom lip, his eyes travelling to my forehead and back to my eyes. "Who the fuck did this to you, Xavier?"

I gazed at him. His jaw was clenched, his voice trembled with suppressed rage. It was rare that I had ever seen Gray angry. Last time that he had been, I had been battling for my life from near-fatal gunshots. 

"I think...there's something going on in Northern Heart," I shook my head, leaning into him and resting my head on his shoulder. I shut my eyes, breathing deeply. "Something...I don't know what."

He stroked my head, speaking softly. "Who hurt you, Xavier?"

I took a deep breath, whispering in a soft voice. "Caleb."

He froze. I could almost hear his brain working furiously. When he spoke, his voice was cold with hatred. "Where is he?"

"He's...involved in this, Gray," I glanced up at him. "He...he knows what I was. He knows what I did," I shook my head. "I think...this thing goes really far, Gray. I found some accounts papers in his room that showed that Atkinsons Corporation had been sending money, funding the hospital."

He was quiet for a while. "I didn't know they did that."

I shook my head fervently. "They don't. I mean not that I know of. I don't think even Scar knows about this."

He was quiet. I nuzzled his neck, melting into his warm, comforting embrace. "Gray...I...I met Michael. Said he got my whereabouts from Black. I...it was horrible. He says he wants to get to know me. I just..left. And then I was walking back and this car drove up and pulled me in and..." I shuddered at the memory and his grip on me tightened, "-bound me and they said they were taking me to Reznick. But I managed to get out and made a run for it. I called you blindly in the van, I couldn't see. But..when I escaped Caleb turned up and I thought I had called him. He took me to the hospital and something he said made me realize he knew where I was when I hadn't told anyone. Then...at the hospital..." I stuttered, a tornado of emotions in my chest. I wasn't sure I could go on. My body still throbbed from the vicious assault. "I was suspicious so I followed him and he told me to stay out of it."

He was quiet for a long time after I had finished. He pushed me back gently and caressed my cheek tenderly. His eyes gazed into my very soul. "How..how did you manage to enter here so late?"

He smiled softly. "Because...I'm a pretty big deal in the Eastern precinct now."

I chuckled, feeling light-headed. "Of course you are."

I snuggled against his chest and closed my eyes. Every inch of my body still throbbed from the assault. He remained still for sometime before he spoke. "Let's fix you up, Xavier."

I leaned back and shook my head. "I'm fine. It's...nothing."

"Let me have a look."

I sighed and reluctantly leaned back from him. He rose to his feet and pulled me close so I was sitting on the bed, my legs hanging out. He leaned over and gently touched my jaw. "When you said he knows who you were, what do you mean?"

"He called me Sugar Baby and then Harber," I said, struggling not to flinch. If he was shocked by the information, he hid it well. 

"Did you find anything when you followed him?"

I shook my head. 

"You told me he had a doctor friend, is he involved in this?"

I shrugged, wondering if Montgomery could be involved. "Where's your roommate? Jeremiah?"

I inadvertently leaned into his touch as I replied. "He had a kidney stone operation but it got complicated. He's still there for a while."

He reached for my tshirt and took it off me. Unmistakable agony burnt in his eyes when he saw me. I wasn't sure how bad I looked, but from the way his shaky fingers tenderly touched my skin, I was sure it was pretty bad.

He felt along my arms, my shoulders, my chest, stomach. His jaw was hard, his eyes flashed. I could see the sudden tension in his muscles. He murmured in a voice trembling with rage. "I'm going to kill that bastard."

The venom in his voice somehow scared me. His voice didn't waver when he uttered the warning. It was so rare to see him angry. He was like the calm, strong, reliable ocean. But when angered he was like a tsunami. But none of it had ever been directed at me. He was always gentle. Tender. Loving.

"How's...work?" I asked softly, my heart hammered in my chest as if sensing that the missing part of itself was close. He sighed and rose to his feet. 

"Why...didn't you call me, Xavier? Through all this?"

He sounded hurt and it killed me. His eyes shone with concern, sadness. I looked away from him. I clenched the bedsheets and decided to tell him te truth. "Because...I wanted you to come to me, Gray."

He was quiet. His hand touched my cheek, stroking my hair, my lower lip. He leaned in front of me and looked at me, his eyes agonized. "I thought..." he bit his lip and sighed. "Let's talk about that later, alright? I need to fix you up first."

I nodded as his hands reached for my jeans and tugged them off. I felt suddenly consciously. I knew he had seen me broken multiple times, but somehow, this once felt different. I shut my eyes, revelling in his touch as his hands gently went over me. 

"Do you have any other discomfort, Xaby? Breathlessness? Nausea?"

I bit my lip harder, trying to hold back a sob. No one could do to me what he did with every caressing touch. I shook my head no. 

He sighed and stood up straight. I opened my eyes as he sat beside me, raking a hand through his hair. "Did you have more panic attacks?"

I nodded my head, finally opening my eyes and gazing at him. "I...just after Michael called."

His eyes darkened with concern. "What did he say? You don't have to tell me if you're not feeling-"

"That he had been young and stupid," I answered. I felt too exhausted to be angry. "That he doesn't know what to say."

"Xavier," he whispered and pulled me against him, kissing the top of my head. "I can't believe you had to go through that alone."

I melted into his embrace, exhaustion washing over me. "Gray...I'm sleepy."

He was quiet for a while before he gently pulled me into the bed. I turned around, my back to him and hoped and prayed that he would hold me. 

And he did.

A  tear escaped my eyes, my heart shattering. I could feel his warmth that seemed to melt the icicles piercing my heart. A massive weight settled in my lungs, and ache spreading through my heart. He caressed me gently, tenderly. Without me asking, he knew what to do.  I moved closer to him and shut my eyes. His lips reached the spot below my ear as he whispered. "I love you, Xavier. We'll get through this. I promise."

My stomach clenched horribly. It was hard to breathe and I manage to choke out. "I love you, Gray."

He kissed my ear. His warm breath on my skin felt like home again. "I know."

A part of me was terrified he would leave by morning. I couldn't lose him again. I'd go with him to the end of the world; because he was mine. "Gray...don't leave me."

My voice broke, sounding pathetic. I half expected him to be repulsed. But he held me even closer, his arms gripping me possessively. Somehow, the soreness in my body was diminishing in contrast to my aching heart. "I won't, love."

Love. He was calling me love again.

"Okay."

I believed him. My heart was too exhausted to be suspicious. He had to be there when I woke up in the morning, the contrary was simply unfathomable. 

"We'll make this work, Xavier," he whispered. I was stunned to hear his voice trembling as if it was causing him physical ache to speak. "You're my world."

I smiled softly at his declaration. I needed to say something. Anything that would let him know how devastatingly my heart ached for him. How much I yearned for his touch. How agonizing it was to stay away from him. How now that he was here, the infinite abyss in my heart was slowly pulling together to mend the expansive crevice.

I placed my hand on his, encircled around my waist and intertwined our fingers. I brushed my lips across his, my heart full. "Grayson...it's always been you. It always...will be."

I don't know if he responded as I finally gave in to the stupor. Warmed by his body and cocooned by our love. 

I was home.