most of these are from people at school because my school is cursed

"i've been spending the past five weeks convincing him that i have a sister."

"you just confiscated my girlfriend!"

"this is like, a special dick hole."

"I GAVE YOU MY TRUCK HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME LIKE THIS??"

"we should've made him wear the duct tape thong again."

"get your p e n i s off my comb."

"i'd high five mo bamba."

"i can't believe this is my second day in a row eating salt water, i'm not even at the beach!"

"he ate a hot dog and caught fire."

"we don't need a flashlight... JESUS IS OUR LIGHT."