Brooding! Yes, KL Rahul was in his room brooding instead of celebrating and going out like the rest of the team.  He wasn't feeling like going out and he wasn't feeling very accepting to any  company too. Locking himself in his room with some sad songs playing in the background, if anyone asked Rahul would have said it was the secret behind his composure keeping up the pretense of collectiveness.

Rahul was actually tired of pretending. He was tired being this person. It was hard being this person. It was hard keeping up the face. It was hard to not shout or yell. It was hard not letting everything go and break. It was hard trying to be this composed person. It was hard acting like nothing bothered him when it did. He was bothered by many things, he hated containing everything.

Once upon a time, he was a man with his heart on his sleeves. Now, he is shell of the boy he once was and he didn't know whether it was the right way to go or not? He wasn't some saint who wasn't bothered by Maxwell's performance, yes, he wished he got runs but not like this, not against them. Each six by that guy, hurt him, bothered him and made him just so frustrated. He wanted to let go, he wanted to let it out yet he couldn't? How could Mr Composed break his calm facade?

He didn't know.

He had been pretending for so long, this shell has become his shield and he didn't know how to break it?

Should he even?

It doesn't make any sense to him. He knew the reason behind his wicket today. Maxwell's bowling wasn't that great. Heck, it wasn't even a wicket taking ball to be truthful. Maxwell didn't take his wicket, he gifted his wicket. Well, his contained anger become his downfall, to be truthful. The poisonous fire that was running through his veins watching Maxi bowl. All reasonable thoughts had vanished. All logic had vaporized. He just wanted to hit that guy out of the park.

He...he really didn't know what he really wanted to do there? Maybe hitting him for back to back sixes was the plan but it didn't quite go like the plan. It seemed the Aussies knew, he would try to hit Maxi and well, that was quite a shrewd move.

And here, he was in his room brooding again. Brooding over everything that went wrong in today's match and wasn't it such a nice way to spend the last day of his vice-captaincy! His thoughts were totally acidic in the moment, full of anger, guilt and contained emotions, tearing him from inside. God, he wanted to scream and shout and let it all go but...but...how will he?

Do anyone really remember the real him anymore? The thought hadn't even crossed his mind when the overly chirpy sing song voice of his captain rang around him. Well, Why wasn't the guy out really?

"Rahuliyaaaa...Omere Rahuliyaaaa,"

"Sup"

The Captain asked merrily plopping beside Rahul seemingly totally unaware of the gloomy air in the room while Rahul was certain he had locked the room. How the hell this guy made his way inside his room then? Rahul didn't know. It was beyond him. He really wasn't in a talking mood. Well, if he did he was certain it will either acid or sobs out of his mouth both didn't seem like a good option to him.

"Rahuliyaaa....I'm talking to you re and what's with the playlist choice?" Virat asked far more seriously and patiently then Rahul had ever heard him speak. It wasn't Virat's usual approach of unbolting the bolted emotions. Virat usually talked silly and forced the people to snap their frustrations out but tonight didn't feel like it was going that way.

"Rahul!"

"What happened kiddo?"

"What's bothering you? What switched on your brooding mode this time?" Virat continued asking softly even though he wasn't receiving any answer from his kid. His kid even refused to look at him but Virat was never the one to give up on his kids.

"You know everyone's missing you out there, right"

"Really Virat! And why are you here? Don't you have some places to go with Hardik or something?" Rahul snapped, not believing Virat was using the guilt trap with him and were they really missing him? Rahul didn't think so...

"Well, I asked you out too, you know" Virat replied, ignoring everything else.

"And I said no, so, can't you leave me alone please?" Rahul begged and Virat refused to  move away from his spot. He stayed talking, asking even though Rahul kept his mouth zipped. After all, he was quite good at this game. He knew how to keep everything in. He knew, how to be this nonreactive person but he forgot the person with him was his brother, his brother, who knew how to push his buttons, just fine.

"It's the series, isn't it" Virat said knowingly and noticing Rahul unconsciously shrink a little more in him added, what felt like almost, thoughtlessly to Rahul, "You do know, I don't expect you to behave like Mahi bhai, right?"

"Don't you?" Rahul couldn't help but ask, a self-mocking smile on his lips. Well, didn't everyone want him to carry on the footsteps of Mahi bhai, be like him, talk like him and stuff. The hurt, the uncertainty, the doubts shinning clearly in his eyes.

"Rahul.."

"No, Virat, don't try to twist your words, please, I can't believe you truly didn't miss Mahi bhai behind the stumps during my stints today? you can't make me believe you didn't miss Mahi bhai when I got the DRS wrong, when I didn't take Nattu's drs soon enough, it could have changed the match... truthfully, tell me you didn't miss Mahi bhai then, heck, you didn't wish it was Rishu there?"

There was vulnerability in Rahul's eyes as he looked at Virat. The self-mocking tilt of his lips corroding Virat's heart. It was Virat's Rahul, alright.

"No, I didn't," Virat admitted, making Rahul scoff looking away from Virat.

But, it didn't stop Virat from continuing, "But I missed my Rahuliya behind the wickets,"

Rahul couldn't help but look at Virat totally baffled hearing his words. What did he mean by I'm missing my Rahuliya? He was the one doing wicket-keeping, wasn't he? so, what did he mean by "I'm missing my Rahuliya?"

"Yes, I'm...I'm missing the boy full of swag that swaggered in my life. I'm missing the boy whose smiles weren't a priced commodity. I'm missing the full of energy, free and mad guy. Who didn't need to tell people, I'm totally different in my circle. The guy with mischief shinning in his eyes. The guy who dared to place the boombox next to AB's ear. I missed my Rahuliya, my Rahuliya, who was free and full of vibe. I missed that over-energetic, enthusiastic guy behind the wicket. The guy who wasn't afraid to give back when someone triggered him. The guy who didn't force a composed persona on him. The guy who isn't trying to intimate someone else, forgetting his own personality. The guy who danced with Shamsi on field celebrating his wicket. I miss that Rahuliya, my Rahuliya" Virat said looking at Rahul pointedly.

Did Rahul really think Virat missed the current changes in Rahuliya?

If Rahul really thought that Virat didn't notice the small bits about him then Rahul was very-very disillusioned. Virat had known him for ages now. He had known that 21 year kid full of swag, swagering in his life. He had held the 22 year old kid in his arms after his disastrous debut and also, after his maiden century. He knows the kid better that the kid thinks and if the kid thinks, he hadn't noticed his sudden suppression of emotions and smiles then the kid was mad.

Rahul didn't really thought how to react to Virat's words. He thought everyone forgot the real him. He thought he had fooled everyone into thinking he was more like the calm and composed people of the country. He thought no one remembered the "Kutty Kohli" anymore but he was wrong. Virat couldn't ever forgot his Rahuliya, the kid who reminded him of himself. His kid. His original Rahuliya.

Rahul didn't know how to react to Virat's words. Could he really be that guy again?

He didn't know.

He had forgotten how to be that guy. He didn't know how to react to Virat's words. He didn't know what to say? He thought everyone had forgotten about his real personality. He thought he had fooled them but it seemed , he hadn't. It seemed Virat knew he let all the negativity change him and he didn't know how to answer Virat's question.

"Who would have danced with me? Nattu" He quipped instead, ignoring everything.

"He might have if you tried," Virat winked but on a serious note added; "Be yourself, Rahuliya. Be my Rahuliya. Don't let anything snatch away your own personality, don't let the world shape you into something, you aren't."

Virat said ruffling Rahul's hair as he walked out of the room, knowing Rahul needed to think over his words. Sometimes, you really needed to listen to your souls voice to know what you needed to do and so, Virat left Rahul to his thoughts.

He didn't knew whether he will get the Rahuliya of old back or not? But he had to try, didn't he? He had to stop his Rahuliya from becoming something he isn't but the final call would be Rahul's.

Virat didn't know whether he'll get his old kiddo back or not? But he knew, he'll always love his Rahuliya even if he acted his Rahulish self with only him.

Rahul didn't know whether he could be like his old self again or not?

But, he knew one thing, he'll always be his Virat bhaiya's Rahuliya.

~the end~

I didn't know what I wrote seriously, but I've been really missing the old Rahul.