It was the day of the 71st annual Hobbit Fair. Frodo was ready to rap, and everyone was maybe not so ready to hear him rap. For when he stepped on stage and recited his rap, (see chapter 1), everyone was completely silent.

"Word!" Frodo said when he was finished, and dropped the mic. He stared out at the crowd who was baffled by his rapping. The only one who seemed undaunted was Gandalf.

"Frodo, ahem, Yolo Swaggins," Gandalf said, "you may have decided to go towards a rapping career, but some may not deem it wise unless you can actually rap."

"Well, Gandalf the Grey, what do you suppose is actual RAPPING?" Frodo asked.

"The name's Gandawg The Bae, to you, Yolo Swaggins," said Gandalf. He put on his black shades and stood up, walking up to the stage.

"Well, Gandawg The Bae, what to you suppose is actual RAPPING?" Frodo asked again.

"It's a good thing that I am an actual rapper," Gandalf walked out onto the stage.

"Show us, Gandawg, show us!" A hobbit from the crowd called.

"Yeah, Gandawg!" A chorus of cries echoed the first one.

"I would be delighted to." Gandalf chuckled.

Gandalf cleared his throat and began to rap.

I'm sorry Yolo Swaggins
You don't know where it's at
Your rhythm's okay
But your words are all flat

Tell me, Mr. Yolo
What you aim to be
The way you lay around
You remind me of a tree

I said uh-huh.
Yeah, yeah, uh-huh

I'll show you how to rap
I'll show you the recap
I'm not tryin' to be a sap
But you're rap's a load a' crap

This is how ya do it
We're really gettin' to it
We're gonna really brew it
Come on, let's go and do it!

Yeah, yeah
Ayo, Yolo Swaggins, it's time
Straight out of the smelly dungeons of rap

May I have your attention please?
Yolo Swaggin's rap can't even bring a sneeze
But when I hit the floor
My rap is not a bore
Cuz everyone wishes
To be like me

I'm not afraid
To walk to Mordor
To walk to Erebor
The Eagles would be faster
And I am their master
But I'll make everyone walk
Anyway
Anyway

So let's go
Follow a map
Along the way we'll rap
I'll lead you down a trail
In Middle Earth

I'm almost at the mountain
Oh yeah oh yeah
I deserted all of you before
Oh yeah oh yeah
I'm lookin ahead
Oh yeah oh yeah
Now I'm lookin' behind
Oh yeah oh yeah

Just fight an orc
It's your only chance
To prove your majesty
And to do a dance
So do a dance
And fight an orc
Prove your majesty
Fight an orc
Eat salted pork

It's your one chance
To walk to Erebor
You may die
You may live
You may steal
You may give

Come on, Yolo, let's dance
Come on, Yolo, let's dance!

Put those hands in the air
I'm crashin' in on this fair
I killed a Balrog in his lair
Fightin' Orcs I got my fair share

Let's walk through Middle Earth through the storm
Through any weather
We'll be together
Cold or warm
Cold or warm

Don't eat 4 loaves of lembas bread
Just eat one bite and you'll be fed

I have no upper body strength
I fell down a hole well ain't that great
But now I'm back
And I'm gonna rap
Yolo Swaggins into space
Yolo Swaggins IN YOUR FACE!

Don't knock a skeleton down a hole
Pippin did that and he's a fool
Knock him in next time
Knock him in next time

I'm a good guy
And I follow the rules
But in dangerous times I say
Fly you fools!
Fly you fools!
Fly you fools!

Yolo don't cry
Oh Yolo
Oh Yolo
Yolo don't die
Oh Yolo
Oh Yolo

That's what I'm Tolkien about!

Gandalf dropped his mic and instantly the whole crowd cheered.

"I can do that and so much more!" Frodo challenged Gandalf.

"Is that a challenge?" Gandalf asked.

"Yeah!" Frodo screamed angrily at Gandalf, trying to muster up the strength to overcome the difference in height.

"You think you can beat me?" Gandalf asked again.

"Yeah!!" Frodo screamed even louder.

"You know what this calls for?" Gandalf asked the audience.

"YEAH!" Frodo screamed so loud he almost fell off the stage. "Oh. I mean, WHAT?"

Gandalf's eyes narrowed through his shades, and an smug smile spread across his lips.

"A rap battle."

The same smug smile spread across Frodo's face, making him look like the Grinch.

"You're on."