AGNES

In the dead of the night, I toss restlessly on the mattress, trying for a comfortable posture that will help me to sleep. It doesn't last one minute before I feel uneasy then I end up tossing again, truly frustrating as it is.

Trying to force myself to sleep proves hopeless because my thoughts continue to wander from one place to another.

My phone is fully charged, yet, I have no desire to call anyone. Besides, Yvonne is probably fast asleep and it's past Tessa's bedtime. If I were a social media freak, perhaps I'd surf through my newsfeed on Twitter or Facebook, watch some videos on YouTube or post hate comments just to provoke someone, but I'm not, which is very good since I can get to utilize my time for more productive stuff, like helping aunty Cherry with her business.

Speaking of aunty Cherry, I hear sounds coming from the kitchen. I'm very sure she's preparing down her cakes for delivery. I don't even know if that's what's keeping me awake.

On the drawer beside the bed is my Geography textbook, and in some way I attempt reading it. I heard a joke that the easiest way to overcome insomnia is to turn your bedroom into a library. Mine is so far from that, since it's covered with childhood paintings and celebrity posters.

I flip the pages open while in bed, but my mind isn't unto anything inside. "Ah! This is useless!" I grunt aloud, sending the textbook back on the drawer.

I slide off the bed and walk to the windowpane. Even though the skies are animated ludicrously with pleasing star lights, stargazing isn't what I need right now. Maybe I need someone to talk to.

Finally, I leave the room holding the sheet over my shoulders. When I come out to the kitchen, I find aunty Cherry multi-tasking with different things; a pan is in the oven, she is mixing dough in another bowl, her eyes are keen on the timer and she looks like a mess.

"Aunty Cherry, are you doing okay in there?"

"Of course! Just trying to finish up this batch."

"Do you need any help?" She visibly needs tons of help, but knowing my aunt, she would do all these things and more, and not break a sweat.

I move closer and wait for her to tone down her busyness.

"Have you had dinner?" She asks.

"Yes. I bought something on my way back since you're officially queen over the kitchen."

She giggles. "I'm sorry, dear. It's late, shouldn't you be in your room preparing to go to bed?"

"I'm not feeling sleepy yet. Can I join you?"

"Sure. You look worried. Girls talk?"

She gets me every time. I find it easy to tell her anything going on in my life and she always has a piece of good advice for me, with no clouded judgments whatsoever. I drag one of the stools beneath the kitchen counters and make myself comfortable. Seeing that she is still busy with a lot and not ready to take a break, yet, I take the bowl of dough from her to assist.

"Aunty, am I being biased?" I ask, whisking the dough inattentively.

"How do you mean?"

"I don't know how to describe it precisely. I just feel I'm being unfair to Felix, you know because of what happened."

"Okay, there has been a lot of things happening between you. Don't expect me to assume what it is."

"Come on, aunt! Please don't act like you don't understand what I mean. I'm referring to what happened in the past!"

She stops slicing the fruits before her and sighs softly, brushing away a side of her head stained with flour. "If this is about your dad, Agnes, my dear, the best advice I can offer you is that you should not let it affect you. There are way more important things for you to worry about."

"I know, and believe me, I'm trying. But I can't help it. I'm reminded of everything whenever I see him."

"You are aware he has nothing to do with what happened, right?"

"Yes." My head droops. "That is what confuses me the more I think about this. On the outside, there's no relation between him and my father but..."

"...you cannot connect the dots?" She takes the words straight out of my mouth.

I use a break to sigh deeply. "I simply hope I will deal with this on the fateful evening before we perform in front of the entire school."

She faces me squarely, putting any other thing she's doing on hold. "Yeah, about that, are you sure you can handle it?"

"I genuinely have no clue." I draw messy circles with my finger on the table. "I don't want to be confident about it, because as we know, being too confident in theatre only means something will go wrong."

She ticks her teeth. "That's oddly true now that I think about it."

I exhale, with my head still down in despair.

"Are you feeling anxious about the play?"

"I really don't know what to feel. On one hand, I'm super excited but on the other, I feel scared that I might do something to mess it up."

"It's all in your head, dear. It is not your fault if you feel this way. At the end of the day, it's just up to you. Just do your best and leave the rest. Everything will be fine, I promise. Not to regard the theatre mythology though."

I manage to laugh a bit.

"Try to think of this like a school project you are working on with your classmates to get a good grade."

"Is that supposed to be of any help?"

The illogicality in that advice cheers me up, but not for long. Talking about my past is the best method to ruin my mood, and only people like aunty Cherry and Yvonne can pull me out of my melancholia.

She places an arm over my shoulders. "But you need to let go of the past, dear. It's for the best if you really think about it," she says softly.

"I hate that feeling of hating on somebody, and I wouldn't want anyone else involved in what I went through. My dad has taken so much from me."

"I understand how you feel."

I see she does. No matter the depth of sadness I tend to plunge myself into, she rescues me on time with her reassuring words. "In Felix's case though, there's always a reason to dislike him."

Briskly, she looks away, splitting her sides. "You really despise this Felix of a guy, huh. I wonder what he did to you that made you hate him this much."

"He doesn't have to do anything first before he starts to get on my nerves," I say invigoratingly. "If murder wasn't a crime, I would've killed him and then hide his body somewhere no one will find. No body, no crime, right?"

"What!" She probably didn't expect I'd say that off the top of my head.

"That's how annoying he is. I want to make him feel my wrath."

"Agnes!"

I raise my head to see her reaction, and damn! Such a good laugh. "I'm pulling your leg!"

She gets over the thrill and gets serious. "Okay, go to your room. Tomorrow is a school day."

"Oh, come on!" I protest, "I'm not even feeling sleepy yet. Let me help you make more cakes."

"Make more cakes?" Her eyes shoot directly at the bowl in front of me.

I turn to look at the work I left unattended and the huge mess I created out of it. The semisolid is spluttered all over the table, the dough itself is starting to look aged. "Oops."

"Thank you. That's enough." She pulls the bowl towards her and shoves me out of the kitchen. "Back to your room, you have to wake up early. Off you go."

Out of options, I walk to my room. "Goodnight, aunt."

I do not wait to hear her reply before I shut the door behind me. When the time says it's thirty-five minutes after midnight, I make up my mind to sleep by all means.

FELIX

By morning, I pick up the brand new phone dad bought for me, after we kind of reconciled then I open my chats to see quite a good number of unread messages, the most recent from Rex.

Rex: Hey, how are you feeling now?

Felix: Better than yesterday.

Rex: You didn't answer me the last time.

Felix: About what?

Rex: About Agnes

Felix: Oh, that. Nothing serious has happened. Here's to hoping this school play coming up on Friday will be the beginning of our love story.

Rex: Huh?! Are you serious?

Felix: Of course I'm not! She's not my type. I'm only doing this because of our deal.

Rex: 😂

Felix: What?

Rex: Just admit it. She's too strong for you.

Felix: I don't have to prove it to you online. You will see it by the end of this term.

Rex: Wow! How overly confident. You still have more time though, in case you do flop. I'm that generous.

Felix: Yeah, sure. Whatever.

Rex: After your play, Agnes will hate you all the more, I'm sure of it.

Felix: Why?

Rex: Because you guys will definitely mess up.

Felix: And what's that supposed to mean?

Rex: It means that you guys are going to wreck the show. Imagine the dazzling and bejewelled star couple of the night are not acquaintances, let alone friends.

Felix: She won't embarrass herself in that huge crowd.

Rex: What if she does actually? All for the sake of spiting your reputation.

Felix: She definitely won't. I will hang her head on a pike before that happens.

Rex: 😂 In your dreams. Ha-ha.

Felix: We'll just have to wait and see then. You have gotten me more determined than ever.

Mom calls for breakfast, just in time to end this silly chat with Rex. Before I log offline, I update my status: ~I cannot wait to waltz this weekend #ilovetheater~

Rex truly knows just how and when to push my buttons, and I'll show him.

I drop the phone back in my bedside locker and hurry out of my room.

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