I Pity My Friends For Being My Friends And Having To Read This At 3AM

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This was a dam bad conversation (If you get the reference you're an awesome fish.) I had this conversation with myself, starting at 00:13 and ending at 01:52. My friends have the patience of literal goddesses to be able to deal with my conflicted brain. Please press f to pay respects to my poor fellow weird peoples... Sorry guys! I love you really!


Legend: Ugh

Legend: Why am I even here anymore

Four: Lege, it's gonna be fine, Rule will be okay

Legend: IT'S NOT OKAY

Sky: Flipping Din Legend please calm down. Some of us are trying to sleep

Legend: Shut it Bird Boy

Twilight: How's about we all just stop yelling at each other

Legend: No

Wind: Oh way to go guys you woke him up

Twilight: How ya feelin' Hyrule?

Hyrule: Like I've been smacked round the face with Wars' sword

Wild: Success!

Four: Wild that isn't a good thing

Warriors: Can we all just shut up

Legend: No

Warriors: Aaarrgh

Warriors: Be quiet for the LOVE OF HYLIA

Twilight: Says the person screaming

Time: Please, boys. I've got a headache

Legend: Ooh, hear that, the old man's got a headache

Wild: Hey Twi can I go do something real quick

Twilight: As long as we don' wake up with lynel guts in our bedrolls again, go for it. I honestly couldn't give a dead dog what your doin' at the moment. Im goin' to sleep an' you can just do whatever

Wild: Hmmkay Twi

Warriors: Now Wild

Wild: Yes?

Warriors: Go away

Warriors: No Wild, please... just go. I need my beauty sleep

Legend: That's right, listen to the great and annoyingly perfect Princess Warriors

Warriors: Oh shut it you

Hyrule: I'm going with Wild

Sky: No Hyrule you are staying right where you are. You're sick. Just don't.

Wind: Guys...

Warriors: Yeah Wind what's up?

Wind: You do realise this is all on the chat, right?

Legend: <THIS MESSAGE HAS BEEN DELETED BY ADMIN WIND>

Wind: Ooh LANGUAGE!

Legend: Pardon my Hylian

Four: Goddesses can you all just SHUT UP

Wind: Oh fine.

Four: Good. Now please get some sleep

Legend: Fine fine you mother cucco

Four: Hey!

Twilight: Oh here we go again...

Twilight: I'm so jealous of Sky...

Wind: Why exactly?

Twilight: He's asleep

Wind: Oh

Time: Wild?

Wild: Yeah?

Time: Why can I smell smoke?

Wild: ...

Time: Wild?

Wild: Yeah?

Time: I'm confiscating your slate

Wild: No Time please I neeeeeed it!!! I', TRYING TO WORK ON MY ARSON TENDENCIES

Time: Cub you know that I won't tolerate arson at 00:27 in the morning

Time: And on that note, it's 00:27. Please go to sleep

Twilight: Oh my Goddesses...

Time: TWILIGHT THAT'S AN ORDER

Wind: Hey

Time: Oh what now?

Wind: It's just... I can't sleep. I've just had a divine revelation

Time: Wind you and Wild are giving me a migraine

Wind: Well I'm sorry old man... but... What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish

Time: Wind...

Wind: Okay okay I'll sleep

Time: Good

Wind: But Time

Time: Yes?

Wind: I'll only sleep if you sleep too

Wild: Why the heck are you still up? Even Four's cracked and gone to sleep

Four: You were saying

Wild: Oh Nayru Four did you have to sneak up on us?

Four: Yeah. You need to keep it down. Hyrule is sleeping off his illness and I'll let you deal with Lege's mother cucco side if you wake him up

Twilight: Oh

Four: Exactly. Now go, sit in your bedrolls. Lie in your bedrolls. In silence. Or do I have to cook tomorrow?

Twilight: ...I'll choose sleep over your cooking

Four: Goid

Four: Now I pity everyone else when they see this

Twilight: Your ramblings or your face?

Four: ...

Wind: Ooh get roasted

Time: WIND YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SLEEPING

Four: ...

Wild: You made him aaannngggrrryyyyy

Twilight: Cub I could do without your attitude right now

Four: ...

Four: ...prepare to die, Twilight of Ordon. How many pieces of your body should i mail to your village?

Wild: RUN TWI

Twilight: ALREADY RUNNIN'!!!!!!

Twilight: D'you think I'm safe yet?

Four: ...no

Twilight: Oh FARORE

Sky: why are you all.... all st-still awake?

Twilight: Shhhhh, go back to sleep, Sky. Nothin's happenein'. Juss' go back tu sleep

Sky: O-oh... hmmkay then

Twilight: That was close

Wild: I can vouch for that

Twilight: WILD? WHAT HAPPENED?

Wild: I got ambushed by a rabid tree, so I set the tree on fire and accidentally started a forest fire

Time: Wild

Wild: Yeah?

Time: You're disowned

Twilight: When everyone else sees this they're gonna think somethin's up. Shut it guys and go to sleep

Time: Oh thank Hylia

Legend: TIME YOU RUINED THE SILENCE

Twilight: Oh shut yer traps the lot of ya before I make ya

Wild: Eep

Four: Okay

Wind: Soy milk

Time: Goddesses Wind

Wild: I'll sell my soul to Beedle rather than listen to you

Sky: No Wild please

Wild: I'm SELLING MY SOUL TO BEEDLE

Wild: NONE OF YOU CAN STOP ME

Wind: OH NO HE'S TOO POWERFUL

Time: And just like that, my headache's back again...

Time: Boys

Time: Seriously

Time: Go to sleep

Wild: Hey Sky

Legend: Sky's asleep you butt now go back to bed

Wild: But I need to ask him something

Legend: Well it can wait until 06:00


I feel so bad for doing that on my friends' group chat at 00:13 in the morning. I'm sorry guys. I really do love you. BTW I actually decicidede  (that's definitely how you spell decided) to put this on Wattpad because my friend stole my phone and found this, read it and then died laughing, so I give it to you. Please don't ask why I wrote this. I don't know either. So, enjoy!!


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