Stella wouldn't sleep knowing that Charles was still mad and misunderstood her, she was gonna make it right because she wasn't gonna repeat the same mistakes that led her to end her relationship with her ex. Charles was too special for her to let him go

"I screwed up" she sighed in frustration while talking to George on the phone

"No, couples fight, it's normal" he assured her and she closed her eyes "But for real though, you are completely over Mason, right?"

"I am, I love Charles so much" she assured him with a firm tone "It had been three hours, he's not coming back. That's it, he realized he doesn't wanna be with me"

"Stella, he loves you, he'd never walk away like that besides you're literally at his house"

"I mean... I get why he was jealous but I don't look at Mase the same way I used to" she stated running her hand through her hair

"Can't say the same thing about him though"

"I'm trying, G. Why can't nobody see that?" Her voice cracked as tears started to gather in her eyes

"Fuck, I'm so sorry, Stel. I know you are" he assured her

"I should go, he's here" she told him with a sigh

"Good luck"

It was past midnight when she heard the door open slowly, Charles thought that she was asleep because they both woke up earlier. When he entered the room she sat up and turned on the lights

"I thought you're asleep" he said with knitted eyebrows before checking his phone "It's one in the morning"

"Take a shower and let's talk, okay? I'll make hot cocoa" she smiled at him softly and he nodded

When he entered the bathroom, she wrapped her robe around her and then walked to the kitchen. She pulled out peanut butter from the fridge because she always ate it with a spoon and as she told him, she did make hot cocoa when she sensed that he was about to finish his shower

Charles entered the kitchen only wearing his pyjama pants and she handed him his cup "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to lash out at you like that" he apologized with a guilty look

"Guilt" she spoke and he frowned at her words "And pain that what I feel whenever I look at Mason"

"I don't understand-"

"You're right, I loved Mason and him and I really thought that one day we're gonna get married and live happily ever after" she trailed him off and he put down his mug

"I'm gonna need alcohol for this" he said before opening his liquor drawer pulling out a whiskey bottle

"We met through one of G's friends who used to play football with Mason in 2017 and we instantly felt that weird beautiful spark and then two months later on New Year's, he asked me out" she revealed with a sad smile before motioning for him to pour her some liquor and he did with a sigh

"He made me forget about you... at some point I even doubt what I was feeling for you at that time, like he really healed all of my wounds and he was so good to me but we were only nineteen, we had a lot a head of us" she continued before taking a large sip from her drink and then winced at the taste "In 2019... He signed for Chelsea and I was so proud of him because it was his dream , so basically it was mine too but that dream slowly turned into a nightmare we both couldn't escape"

"What happened?" Charles asked curiously before taking away her glass "Give me that please"

"He was busy all the time, he barely could see me and I decided to move to New York" she said before letting out a chuckle "I wanted to start my own career so we had to break up right before his twenty first birthday, it was a bit bad for us because we depended on each other a lot and that's why we got back together right after I released my album and then Covid started and we both spent the whole Quarantine together, at least while the lockdown lasted"

"Imagine our reaction when we found out I was pregnant" she revealed and Charles choked on his own breath, she could see the horror in his eyes "It was May 2020"

"You were pregnant? Oh, fuck" Charles cursed running his hand over his hair

"Mason was supportive like always, I was the emotional wreck" she bitterly said before smiling "I could see it in his eyes, he wanted me to keep the baby but he said that he'd go with whatever I wanted and that made me feel a lot better but I was twenty, almost twenty one. I was scared, like really terrified of having a child"

"I found out around the time his niece Summer was born... I met her for the first time when I was two months pregnant. At that time, I was still unsure of keeping the baby but when I held her in my arms. I just knew that I wanted my baby and Mase couldn't be happier, I mean he is a family man, like you are" she chuckled sadly and then gulped a sob

"The first person I called was my sister Cara and I told her but I made her promise to not utter a word until Mase and I gather all of our families and rip the band-aid off... I know that G and my parents would be surprised more than happy so I was scared to tell them"

"Eventually, I decided to keep her, in fact I started to want the baby too. I mean with Mason I knew everything was going to be okay... he was thinking of proposing to me, you know?" she continued as tears began to gather in her eyes "At five months I had a miscarriage, a tough one for sure... at some point they were scared to lose me too"

"I'm so sorry" he wrapped his arms around her waist to pull her closer and she shook her head with a sniffle

"I guess we just weren't strong enough to handle it... That day he had to play against Liverpool. I called his friend and made him promise to not tell him anything until his match ended. I mean he was in Liverpool, I was in his flat in London. There's no way he would've made it in time anyway"

"I'm sorry you had to go through that" he whispered before hugging her tightly and tears began to slowly roll down her cheeks

"It was me... he tried to be there for me but he was closed off and grieving too, it's hard to fight for someone who doesn't wanna fight back, so we broke up after like three months. We could barely see each other and after losing the baby, long distance was tough" she finished and he rubbed her back "That week I wasn't feeling okay at all but I didn't wanna worry Mase, so when he asked me to attend his match, I lied and said that I had to record a song... Sometimes I thought that maybe if I told him that I was in pain, maybe we'd be able to save her"

"It's not your fault, Ella" he whispered kissing her forehead gently "It never was"

"No one knew but my sister Cara, not even George knows, or at least I think so"

"You didn't tell him?" He asked slightly surprised as he pulled away. Stella always told her brother literally everything, he was stunned when she admitted that he had no idea

"It must've been hard to keep that to yourself" he told her wiping away her tears "All that burden"

"Mason was struggling too, a lot. He started to lose his balance at the field... Whenever I looked at him, all I felt was guilt and he needed someone who'd be there for him" Stella stated with a small smile "Like I could've done better to take care of the baby"

"He doesn't blame you, it's not your fault" Charles told her firmly as he lifted her chin up with his thumb do she could look at him "It's not"

"I know"

"Are you sure your brother doesn't know?" He asked with a frown and she nodded "He had warned me not to get your pregnant"

"He said the same thing to Mase" she smiled weakly and he kissed her cheek, letting his lips linger for couple of seconds "It's just... I think that he knows what happened, he just never wanted to make me feel obligated to speak. I mean, lately he'd been even more overprotective than he already was... my anaemia worsened after the miscarriage so it's possible that the doctor mentioned that to my brother"

"The endometriosis-" he trailed off and she nodded with a sigh

"The doctor said that I wasn't being careful, I acted like I wasn't pregnant. I mean, I was never pregnant before so, I thought that it was okay to live like how I used to but... so yeah the miscarriage was caused by my endometriosis" she explained with a shrug "Mase and I planned to tell our family right after his match... it was a girl, she was due February 16"

"The album-" Charles trailed off with wide eyes and she nodded with a sigh

"Yeah, the day I released my album this year. She was supposed to be two years old"

"I'm so sorry, Ella" he kissed her forehead gently

"I'm fine, I really am. You make me happy and I really hope that Mase is doing okay too" she whispered hugging him tightly "Just... I feel guilty and sad that Mase hasn't moved on like I did. I don't know maybe he did but I know he's too scared of commitment"

"Maybe you two should get a closure" he told her honestly because he believed it'd be the only way for them both to rest for good

"I love you, Charles" she said with small smile, she really felt more than lucky to have him. Instead of asking her why she hadn't told him, he only kissed her scars away and healed her deep wounds

"I love you too, Ella"

♠️♠️♠️

Stella was staring at Charles who was sleeping like a baby, she had thought about what he told her. She and Mason both needed a closure because what they'd been through was a lot, they both got out of it damaged

It was 8 am, usually Charles would be up but he didn't sleep until dawn whispering sweet nothings to her. He was a blessing in disguise, she'd honestly wouldn't have actually moved on without him

She removed his arm slowly from her waist trying not to wake him up, and when she succeeded, she picked her phone up from the nightstand and left the room soundlessly. With a heavy sigh, she started scrolling through the old pictures of her and Mason

She was happy with him, sometimes she wondered what went wrong, they thought they were strong enough to go through everything together but clearly that wasn't the case. Each of them struggled in their own ways, Stella couldn't bare the thought of him blaming her

It was too late for the what ifs but she knew that even if they put more of a fight, the outcomes may still be the same. She found a picture of him kissing her belly, she hated the fact that she couldn't let go without knowing he did too

She finally decided to call Mason. He picked up after the second ring "Stel? Are you okay? Where are you?" He questioned worriedly and her heart ached even more

"I'm fine, Mase, I didn't wake you, did I?" She asked trying to keep her voice down so she wouldn't wake her boyfriend up

"No, I was already up"

"I think we should talk" she said glancing at her boyfriend who was still asleep "I think we both really need it"

"I think so too, you pick where you want us to meet up and I'll be there as soon as I can" he told her and she nodded with a small smile "I'll see you later, Stel"

She pulled out her clothes from her suitcase and changed, it was the time of moving on completely. It wasn't fair to her and Mason and certainly it wasn't fair for Charles either, he deserved better than someone who was still stuck in the past

♠️♠️♠️

September 22nd 2020

After Mason received a call from his friend after he finished the match, he managed to be at the hospital at 10:48 pm. Before he entered the room, he was stopped by a doctor. She had to talk to him first before he get to see Stella

"You're the father, I presume" the doctor said and Mason nodded glancing at his girlfriend's room "I'm the doctor Julia, the who treated her"

"Are they okay? Stella is fine, right?" Mason questioned frantically and Julia looked at him sympathetically

"We couldn't save the baby, I'm so sorry" she apologized and Mason froze for a moment trying to let the information sink in "She's asleep for now, for a moment we really thought we wouldn't be able to save her too"

"But she's alright" his voice cracked, Stella had to be alright

"Yeah, her blood pressure was lower that it should had been, she was excessively bleeding, Mr. Mount. She has to stay under our supervision for at least three days"

"But she'll be alright?" Mason asked again and the doctor nodded with an assuring smile, she touched his shoulder briefly and he opened the door slowly to not wake her up

There was a large IV bag of blood and she was sleeping, he spotted his friend James who urged her to the hospital. The latter stood up and approached Mason before hugging him

"I'm sorry, mate" he whispered sincerely and tears began to gather in Mason's eyes. Seeing Stella lying on the bed helpless seemed surreal

"You should've called me" Mason told him wiping away his tears, maybe he wouldn't be able to be there in time but at least, he'd hold her hands and try to kiss her pain away

"Your girl can be scary sometimes" James joked trying to lighten up his mood "She insisted... I was going to but she's convincing and she was kind of right, it's not like you would've made it in time"

"Thank you" Mason sighed, he was grateful either way

"Mase?" Stella called making both men snap their heads towards her, Mason quickly rushed to her

"Hey!" He greeted kissing her forehead and then tucked some strands of her hair behind her ears "How are you feeling?"

"Better" she whispered as she tried to sit up but winced in pain, he quickly put a pillow behind her "Did they mention when will I be able to get out?"

"The doctor insisted that you'd stay here for three days" Mason said before kissing her forehead, she could tell that he was hurt but she didn't know why exactly. It killed her to look into her eyes

"I'm so sorry" she whispered as tears began to gather in her eyes and he shook his head in denial

"It's not-"

"I should've told you that I wasn't feeling okay" she admitted as her lower lip was trembling and he frowned in confusion "Yesterday, I was... I thought it was normal and I didn't want you to miss your game so, I hid it from you. If I knew... I mean I should've known that something was wrong with our baby but I didn't"

Mason opened his mouth to say something, anything but decided against it, instead he wrapped his arms around her kissing the top of her head. A teardrop fell from his eyes as she sobbed against his chest, it killed him just the same and he didn't know what to do about it

"You were so excited to play against Liverpool, I couldn't... it meant a lot to you so I couldn't tell you that I wasn't feeling good, I thought that it'd pass" she revealed biting her inner cheeks so she'd stop herself from crying "I'm sorry, Mase"

"It's not your fault" he whispered rubbing her back gently "It never was, not in the slightest. You did great"

Stella knew Mason never blamed her but she wasn't sure how they'd recover from this, especially that they wouldn't be around each other as much. Would they overcome this?

Flashback's over

♠️♠️♠️

Mason entered the café Stella had sent him the location to, he spotted her first. She smiled at him standing as he approached her hugging her, her flowery smell never seemed to fade

"Are you alright?" Mason asked her when they pulled apart, somehow he knew she was capable of protecting herself but that never meant that he'd stop worrying

"You know Charles wouldn't hurt me" she smiled weakly before sitting down and he nodded slowly

"Does he know you're here?" He questioned but somehow found himself scared of the answer

"He's asleep" she replied and he looked taken back by her answer "I couldn't stop thinking about... how we left things in the past. It's not us Mase. After everything we've been through, we deserved a closure"

"Do you love him?" Mason questioned curiously and she remained silent for a moment "Charles? Does he makes you happy?"

He could see there was no hesitation in her eyes, in fact he was almost sure that she was in love with Charles but her silence somehow turned into fear but even. The fear of feeling that guilt again, to blame himself again

"Yeah, I love him but Mase, you're my first love, what I felt for you will never be what I feel for Charles... You were at that time my everything and I will always cherish our moments together" she promised him before taking his hand with a small smile "And Charles... He is-"

"The love of your life now" he trailed off with a small smile, he knew that there was a difference between first love and someone's lifeline

"I know you're gonna find someone" she said with a serious tone "And you'll stop comparing them to me and our relationship"

After Stella and Mason broke up, she couldn't date anyone after him, whenever she'd start to talk to someone, she'd compare them to Mason and their relationship  but when Charles came to her life again, suddenly that seemed to stop

"I know you're scared... fuck, I am too but Charles was a risk I was willing to take and I'm glad I did" she admitted with a soft chuckle "But my miscarriage wasn't your fault and it wasn't mine too... I stopped blaming myself, I went back to therapy and medication and just so you know, I never even for a second blamed you for not being there that day"

"Writing the album was your way of coping" he stated squeezing her hand and she nodded "It's mind blowing, the way you described the pain-"

"You related to it, I know but the second I chose to write that album, I was ready to fully move on" she said before taking a deep breath "I don't know Mase, I can't tell if you moved on or not but I know something is holding you back and that isn't me"

"When did you realized that you moved on? I mean not from us, I know you did but from the miscarriage?" He questioned and she could see the vulnerability in his eyes, he was always ready to let his guard down in front of her

"I'm not sure if I am completely over it but... I know that you don't wanna hear this but last time I had an unprotected sex was with you, when Charles and I had sex, I was so scared and I flew back to New York before he woke up... and I had a pregnancy scare every week until I got my period and even then I was still scared" she revealed with a defeated look "I don't think that I am completely over it but I'm willing to move on... there's no wrong or right way to tell but if you're willing to move on, that what really matters"

"It really messed me up" he confessed and she nodded in understanding "Not only the miscarriage but our relationship too, I mean we were certain that we'll get married someday, fuck I even was thinking of buying a ring. We made it through the hardships together, yet we couldn't get through the distance"

"We were young, you were travelling around and I wanted to start my own career. Even if we didn't lose our baby, I think that we were meant to break up, one way or another" she stated and he stared at her for about ten seconds without uttering a word

"I guess you're right"

"You will find someone else... remember what you used to tell me? If it's meant to be, it will be" she reminded him with a pointed look and he chuckled "You will be happy because I'm sure it's meant for you to be happy"

"There is... Eloise Rice" he admitted with a small smile

"Declan's little sister? How are you still alive?" She joked with a pointed look and he chuckled softly "But I knew it... the way you talked about her when we first met, I knew you felt something for her. What is it? What's holding you back?"

"Fear... I don't know, I keep thinking about how you left and if something wrong happens she'll leave too and I can't lose her, Stella. I can't" he admitted shaking his head in denial "We're expecting"

"First of all congratulations, I'm so happy for you, I really am but also you need to stop comparing our relationship with what you have with her. I was like you at first but I kept telling myself that it's different and that Charles and I are different... that we will make it work. Talk to her, tell her how you feel. Trust me, the communication is the key"

"You sound like Kai" he told her with an amused scoff

"Well, Kai is a wise man"

"Thank you, Stel. Thank you so much" he told her sincerely before standing up and she did too before hugging each other

They did remember that they were each other's safe and favourite places. Moving on was one hell of a journey but she knew he'd get there because he was stronger than he thought he was

"You're so stronger, Mase, please remember that. Eloise is a lucky girl and congratulations again"

♠️♠️♠️

Stella opened the apartment door to see both Charles and Arthur in the living room, she frowned closing the door behind her as her boyfriend sighed in relief "I was worried about you" he told her before walking towards her hugging her

"It's Monte Carlo, Charles no one get lost in Monte Carlo" Arthur stated with an eye roll

"I'm fine, Charles. I just didn't want to wake you up" Stella told him with an assuring smile

"Now if you don't mind, Charles, I have things to do" Arthur glared at his brother before hugging Stella kissing her forehead and then walked out of the apartment leaving the couple alone

"I was with Mason" she admitted quickly and Charles froze for a moment, he wasn't even sure of how to react "I couldn't sleep so I called him this morning and suggested that we need to talk... I feel so fucking relieved and... my past no longer haunts me like some sort of a nightmare, what we had was too beautiful for that and I'm glad that I finally got that closure"

"I'm happy for you" he told her with a genuine look, he could feel it, like she was no longer tied that she was truly his this time, body and soul

"You don't seem okay" he stated when he noticed her teary eyes

"I think... I think we need time apart. You and I" she suggested as her voice shook and he looked taken back "I just- I"

"Do you still have feelings for him?" Charles questioned with a raised eyebrow and she shook her head in denial

"No, no... My relationship with Mase is in the past, I promise. I'm not in love with him anymore... I'm in love with you" she assured him as a tear escaped her eye and she looked away "Plus, he has a girlfriend and they're expecting"

"You're happy with me... aren't you?" He asked and vulnerability shone in his eyes and she nodded "Then why? Why all of sudden you want us to be apart? Just when you and Mason met up?"

"Mason has nothing to do with this" she stated with a firm look

"Then why? I deserve to know!"

"Because I can't drag you down with me" she admitted before closing her eyes briefly "I am messed up and that's not what you need right now"

"If it's about the championship, fuck it. I don't want it if it's gonna cost me you! I want you more, I love you and if you want time to heal, I'll give you that, I'll even help you but just don't push me away, please"

He approached her wrapping his arms around her waist before kissing her forehead gently "I want you, you're not messed up, you're just coping and moving on from your loss and I'm willing to help you do that" he promised her softly

"I love you, Charles, I honestly don't know if I could live without you being in my life" she whispered before standing on her tiptoes capturing his lips "I'm so sorry "

He wasn't sure but even the kiss felt kind of different, more intimate and passionate than it was before. Her thoughts were finally his so was her heart. Mason was no longer in the picture, he knew he ought to stop thinking otherwise

"You'll fight for us, right?" Charles asked breathlessly, he recalled the previous night when she mentioned that Mason tried to fight for them but she didn't wanna fight back

"Always"

After she told him everything about her past relationship, he knew that it was a challenging task to face the burnt of the damage her past relationship caused. He was going to be patient with her, whenever she was feeling insecure or she tried to walk away out of fear like last time, he would stick by her and keep reminding her that he loved her

Their kiss deepened like almost everytime. He ran his fingers lightly on her arms sending shivers down her spine, he bit her lower lip and she moaned against his lips

"I missed this" she whispered against his lips and he chuckled quietly, he moved his mouth to the corner of her lips. She didn't want to stop, desire running through her veins like an adrenaline rush

"We need to meet up with Mama Pascale" she whispered before moaning out loud when he bit her neck

"Just few minutes" he told her quietly and she nodded, she knew it was never minutes but she also didn't want to stop. The way she'd loose myself with him was intoxicating

He moved his hands to her hips lifting her up, he walked them to the nearby wall, he nipped at her earlobe. His fingers digging into her tight 'til the point where he left marks on her skin

He pushed her against the wall, his hands flattening against the wall, folding his body against hers until they were pressed together. She let out a moan against his lips making him bite her lower lip

"Bedroom" she told him with a gasp when he sucked her neck hungrily leaving hickey on her, she'd kill him if she saw how big it was

He walked them to the bedroom and then to the bed he leaned down on top of her as he grabbed her right thigh hoisting it up to his waist. She quickly took off her shirt leaving her with just her bra

His eyes darkened as his gazes moved to her topless body, he might had been with other women too but he never really cared now when he was with her, she was enough. She was his fantasy for as long as he remembered

"I love you" he told her softly "Je t'aime, Stella"

He helped her take off her pants. Their naked bodies pressed against each other and placed both of his hands on her thighs and squeezed them gently before kissing down her stomach. His kisses were gentle and teasing, she gripped on the white sheet tightly trying not to moan loudly

He moved down to her core causing her to gasp lightly as her chest was heaving and her breath was staggered. He was flushed, his eyes almost black with desire as she moaned out his name repeatedly

"Charles Marc Hervé Perceval Leclerc, stop teasing!" she breathed out as she couldn't open her eyes and he quickly looked up. Hearing her calling him by his full name like that seemed to make him look alarmed

Climbing back over her, he kissed her more passionately as the kiss became more heated "Open your eyes" he demanded as his tone was rough with desire before grabbing both of her hands pinning them above her head

"Charles" she repeated once again weakly and he entered her slowly causing her breath to hitch. She ran her hands all over him, she couldn't understand how everything she had with him was different

Her eyes rolled back as her vision went blur. She ran her fingers along his body, her heart pounding, hardly. Their eyes met, they were touching all along their bodies, but neither of them spoke. He pulled her against him, gentle now, and kissed the line of her throat again, and her shoulder

He knew this wasn't their last time together but she was leaving for a while, he was slow like he want to savor and memorize every second. Her hands clawed at his back

His eyes were flashing with pure love and desire. He continued his slow and torturous rhythm causing her to dug her fingers into his back once again all of sudden he bit her neck and she whimpered in pleasure before he pulled away

"Look at me" he demanded lowering his head to her ear and she opened her eyes even though she couldn't see him clearly

He picked up his pace between her legs causing her to move her hand to the back of his neck and she tighten her grip in there, minutes turned to hours but she didn't mind, she never did

♠️♠️♠️

You guys wants to see something else in this book? Any ideas?