𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒊: 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒐 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏
𝐒𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐎𝐍𝐄
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❨2007❩

"i love that dress, is it one of eleanor's designs?" an older woman complimented madi as she stood with a champagne glass in her hand and a bored expression. she didn't know who this women was but she had to make friendly conversation to avoid a lecture from eleanor herself later.

"yes, it is," the brunette replied, a fake smile plastered on her face as she took another sip of the champagne. she wore a short-hemmed, a-line dress made from black fabric with floral black lace decorating the shoulders and sleeves. one similar to blair's but more modest and less tight-fitted as eleanor had originally intended both of the dresses to be before blair had spoken to a seamstress in secret to make the alterations she desired.

the room was full of rich, middle-aged men and women who didn't care about you or your life at all but rather your money and social standing. it wasn't exactly ideal company but it had become a custom for both of the waldorf girls.

extravagant parties and lavish dresses with accessories to match was a regular scene. with waiters in suits charting around expensive wine or appetisers and business men and women making deals every second, there wasn't much room to breathe. but that was the waldorf way.

"madi, emergency. i need you," a voice whispered as a hand wrapped around her forearm, tugging her urgently. blair waldorf, madi's cousin and friend. however, she was a sister more than anything. she was the one person who would always have her back and who madi would never dream of letting down.

they were an odd pairing as while madi was always calm and kind, avoiding even the sight of conflict, blair relished in the chaos of it, often being the cause of it as well. but they made it work.

"i'm sorry, will you excuse me for a minute?" madi told the adults surrounding her who all nodded, unbothered by her absence. blair's grip then tightened, quickly removing the pair from the scene and into a less crowded hall. "what is it?" madi asked, concerned about the obvious panic in both blair's expression and tone.

"she's back. i can't believe she's actually back," blair said though it was hard to decipher just what she meant as she didn't give any details. she paced nervously in the narrow space, receiving a few strange stares from onlookers whom the pair ignored.

"blair, what are you talking about?" madi asked, growing more worried at blair's vagueness. she had no idea what her cousin was referring to but she could tell by the way she was anxiously picking at her freshly manicured cuticles that blair was not okay.

"check gossip girl!" blair told her urgently, rushing her to grab out her phone only for madi to realise she left it in her room. becoming impatient, blair grabbed out her phone from her small designer bag before opening up the gossip girl update for her. "read," blair insisted, shoving the phone into her hands and so madi did as she said. usually, blair wasn't easily shaken but whatever it was had seemed to really upset her.

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hey upper east siders, gossip girl here... and i have the biggest news ever. one of my many sources, melanie91, sends us this:

spotted at grand central, bags in hand: serena van der woodsen. was it only a year ago our it-girl mysteriously disappeared for quote 'boarding school'? and just as suddenly she's back.

don't believe me? see for yourselves. lucky for us, melanie91 sent proof. thanks for the photo, mel!

spotted: lonely boy... can't believe the love of his life has returned. if only she knew who he was. but everyone knows serena, and everyone is talking.

wonder what blair thinks. sure, they're bffs but we always thought blair's boyfriend nate had a thing for serena.

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❨2007❩

"she's back?" madi questioned after reading the post, having to read it twice as she convinced herself that her mind was simply playing tricks on her. neither of the two girls had expected serena to make her reappearance anytime soon, let alone at all. it was a shock to them both.

"well, it seems like it!" blair exclaimed, her irritation showing in the volume of her voice which drew attention to the pair. blair sent a frustrated glare towards bystanders who were not so subtly watching them after hearing her outburst.

"how many times has gossip girl been wrong? it could just be an old photo," madi shrugged though a part of her didn't believe the words coming out of her own mouth. there was proof on the very screen in her hands but she wasn't quite convinced. perhaps if she saw for herself she might be a little more assured.

"did you see what they said about nate?" blair said in a quieter tone as people began minding their own business again. blair had always been quite insecure, especially in her relationship with nate and friendship with serena. she never told anyone other than madi about the thoughts in her head and instead held up a strong facade. according to blair, it was necessary if she wanted to be the queen of constance which proved right as she now was, but at a cost that not many people realised.

she was always worried that nate would get bored of her and leave or that people would forget about her because she was always being bested by serena. perhaps she made up most of her concerns in her head but she couldn't shake it. maybe that's why she always got along with madi. she liked the spotlight whereas madi preferred her privacy, very happily living in her cousin's shadow. there was never any competition between them.

"nate's a good boyfriend, b. gossip girl is just some scared kid hiding behind a computer screen who has nothing better to do then torment those of us who actually have a life," madi defended her best friend from gossip girl's claims causing blair to hesitantly nod in agreement. she couldn't quite tell if the shorter girl completely agreed with her but she seemed more at ease now.

"i'm gonna go find nate. see you later, m?" blair said, completely disregarding the blast in the matter of seconds, now looking more determined than frantic. she really had a knack for pretending like she was fine even when her world was crumbling down around her. blair would be one hell of an actress if she wanted to be.

"of course," madi smiled, moving to the side to allow blair to head past. she was certainly blair's moral compass or perhaps the person who she could freely vent to without the worry that it will be repeated to anyone or end up as the new headline on gossip sites. the two girls knew that, no matter what happened, they could rely on each other to be there no matter how bad things got.

"madison, care for some company?" a masculine voice called out from the other side of the room, two girls on each leg and a suggestive expression on his face. chuck bass. the two teenagers were very different which often caused the two to clash, especially when chuck's morals seemed to bend a little, but they were friends nonetheless.

"go hit on one of the help, chuck," madi told him, walking away from the boy with a disgusted look which soon turned to surprise when she heard her aunt call out a certain name. that's when she realised just how true the rumours were.

"serena van der woodsen? is that you?" eleanor exclaimed before going to hug the out-of place, underdressed blonde. "oh, madi! look who it is!" eleanor tugged the brunette's hand to pull her over after noticing her.

"serena, hi!" madi smiled, the pair embracing in an awkward hug. the silence was deafening as onlookers stared at the exchange.

"i should go find blair. wait here, okay?" eleanor said enthusiastically before heading off in search of her daughter.

"so..." serena began. she wasn't sure what to say in that moment. there probably wasn't a right thing to say at all. a small sigh of relief escaped her lips without her realising when madi spoke up first.

"how was boarding school?" madi grinned, a slight hint of insolence in her tone though it pails in comparison to how blair was likely to react. madi was never as close to serena as blair so her disappearance hit blair the hardest, not to mention she was just the snarkier of the two.

"it was okay," serena answered, clearly aware of the small amount of resentment hidden between the brunettes's words. she hadn't informed anyone of her departure before she left and it was safe to say that it hurt all the people close to her. "if you don't mind, i need to go find my mom," serena told her.

"of course, don't let me stop you" madi painted on a fake smile as she let her former friend walk off. she didn't know exactly what to think of her return but she knew from the small scene earlier with blair that it would cause more harm than good.

she then looked to her right to see nate walking out of a room, fixing his tie. he spotted serena with her mom and began walking towards her just as blair exited the room, getting in his way and glancing over at serena, her dress slightly scrunched and uneven at the neckline. it didn't take much thought to work out what the couple were doing in the room before they were interrupted.

"hi! serena, so good to see you!" blair hugged the girl, playing nice in front of the crowd watching them.

"it's good to see you" serena replied.

"come, we're about to have dinner!" blair pulled the blonde with her, latching onto madi's hand as the pair passed her to bring her along too.

"i'll set a place for you at the table next to blair and madi" eleanor stopped the girls from walking further, an ecstatic smile on her face at the thought of the three girls being back together. even she noticed the difference in blair since serena had left.

"yeah actually, um, there's somewhere i have to go" serena replied vaguely, an avidity to remove herself from the rather unpleasant situation right now.

"you're leaving?" blair questioned though the question was shielding an old hurt from when she left to boarding school without saying goodbye.

"yeah, i just- i don't feel well. i just wanted to come by and say hi. i'll see you both at school tomorrow" serena said as she quickly left the party.

"predictable" madi muttered under her breath, only loud enough for blair to hear.

"school. so i guess she's back for good" blair said as kati and is came over, disappointment tangled her tone.

"didn't you know she was coming?" kati questioned, catching blair off guard. blair always kept up the ruse that her and serena still spoke often and that she knew that serena was going to leave in the first place. madi looked to blair to see whether she wanted to lie or tell the truth. "of course i did. i just wanted it to be a surprise" blair told them though they seemed unconvinced, as did an eavesdropping chuck bass.

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word is that s bailed on the waldorf's party in under 90 seconds and didn't even have one lemoncello. has our bad girl really gone good? or is it all just part of the act? why'd she leave? why'd she return? send me all the deets.

and who am i? that's one secret i'll never tell. the only one. xoxo gossip girl.

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❨2007❩

"so cute! they should be framed or something," isabel said as she inspected one of the kiss on the lips party invites from the box, clearly impressed with the young girl's calligraphy and craftsmanship. and isabel wasn't alone in that opinion.

"not bad work. and here's yours, as promised," blair handed the youthful blonde her own invite, the huge smile on the excited girl's face unparalleled to any that she had seen in a while.

"thanks" the girl beamed.

"they look amazing. i'm-" madi introduced herself after admiring the invite that she had been handed.

"oh, i know who you are. madison waldorf. you're like always on gossip girl," jenny interrupted, clearly jumping at a statement quicker than her mind could comprehend as her face screwed up a little while she mentally scolded herself for acting foolish or at least that's what she thought. madi gave her a small smile of reassurance to possibly help settle the girl's racing nerves.

"you can just call me madi. everyone does," madi told her with the warm smile still holding up on her face. girls like her came and went on a daily basis. those who thought they had the potential to become the next queen or rather those who just wanted a slightly higher seat on the met steps. this girl was different though, not the usual obnoxious upper-east sider. she was sweet and clearly didn't know what she was so desperately trying to get in to.

"okay! i'm jenny," the blonde freshman grinned widely, feeling a little calmer now.

"hey, here you guys are. i looked all over the dining hall for you," serena approached, eating a spoonful of her yogurt. the group fell into awkward silence as serena introduced herself to jenny having not recognised her. serena then caught a glimpse of the invites on the step. "so, when's the party?"

the group waited for either blair or madi to speak up, eyes more focused on blair as she was the more promising candidate.

"saturday. and, you're kinda not invited" blair told her the harsh truth, giving it no sugar coating at all. upon seeing serena's confused and shocked face, blair began to justify why the old constance it girl wasn't invited to one of the main events of the year. "since, until 12 hours ago, everyone thought you were at boring school. now we're full, and jenny used up all the invites."

it was obvious that blair put the freshman in an uncomfortable position with her statement causing her to stutter out a rebuttal. "um, actually-" she began but was interrupted by blair.

"you can go now."

jenny kept her smile as she walked away, catching the sorrowful look madi sent in her direction as she left.

"sorry," blair shrugged, her voice as meaningless as her words.

"no, it's okay. i got a lot of stuff to do anyway," serena said as she threw the invitation down at kati's feet which she didn't seem to happy about.

"well, we should get going then." blair picked up all her items and stood up. "unless you want us to wait for you. looks like you got a lot of yogurt left."

"no, go ahead." serena and blair exchanged ominous glares before blair lead the rest of the girls down the steps. madi did her best to avoid the tension, not wanting to get involved. she was never that close to serena in the first place but also just didn't really want to contribute to the power struggle on the met steps so she kept quiet.

"blair, think we can meet tonight?" serena seemed to want to work out the pair's differences.

"i'd love to, but i'm doing something with nate tonight," blair declined.

"the palace, eight o'clock? nate will wait," serena clearly disregarded blair's dismissal.

"i could probably do a half hour," blair negotiated.

"thanks for making the time," serena sent a forced smile in the brunette's direction.

"you're my best friend," blair returned a just as forced smile to the blonde.

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❨2007❩

chuck, nate and madi were walking through the park after school. they often would come here a few times a week at least. chuck was walking with a blunt between his fingers that they had all passed around a few times.

madi had zoned out of their conversation a little, not wanting to hear any more about blair and nate's plans for tonight as she'd heard enough about it from blair already and the sex life of her cousin and best friend wasn't exactly a topic she liked to hear about all the time.

"do you ever feel like our whole lives have been planned out for us? that we're just gonna end up like our parents?" nate questioned. his dad had been pressuring him to go to dartmouth like all his family before him did but nate never seemed to like that idea. college wasn't a new topic either, it had been talked about in his family since before nate could walk much like most upper east side families. when nate and madi were twelve they had made a plan to go to columbia together but that was quickly shot down when his parents refused to even consider it.

"a drunken idiot or dead. well my life sure seems great if that's the case," madi joked, humour that a psychologist may deem unhealthy but it helped her cope with her bleak reality. with an absent father and a dead mother, she didn't have many expectations to live up to. she didn't have the same pressure nate did when it came to colleges among other things but sometimes she'd trade that for a parent who was alive or at least cared enough to send a card on her birthday.

"man, that's a dark thought," chuck laughed though he was already on track to ending up like the infamous bart bass.

"and aren't we entitled to choose? just to be happy?" nate continued as madi reached out for the blunt between chuck's lips, taking a hit herself.

"look, easy socrates," chuck cut him off before he could continue on his grim rant, his comparison of the boy to a greek philosopher going directly over nate's head. "what we're entitled to is a trust fund, maybe a house in the hamptons, a prescription-drug problem, but happiness does not seem to be on the menu, so smoke up and seal the deal with blair, because you're also entitled to tap that ass."

"seriously? you're disgusting, chuck," madi shoved his shoulder away lightly as he let out a throaty laugh.

"you aren't exactly the picture of innocence yourself. you lost yours to a random guy you met in a bar if i remember correctly," chuck teased earning a shocked look from the girl beside him. madi then turned to her right to look at nate.

"you told him?" madi asked, rather pissed off. nate sent an equally as annoyed look towards his high friend for letting madi know that he had told him.

"it just slipped out when i was drunk, i'm sorry," nate defended himself but it didn't seem to do much good as madi let out a frustrated scoff.

"you're an ass," madi rolled her eyes at the tall boy on her right causing chuck to laugh a little at the temper on the brunette. "you're an ass too so wipe that smug smile off your face," she snapped at chuck.

"do you even know his name?" chuck continued to torment her with information he wasn't supposed to know in the first place.

"i'm gonna kill you," madi groaned in annoyance to nate. she had only told nate and blair for this very reason. chuck wasn't one to let information like this go to waste, he'd use it against her until his dying day finding every possible way to torture or humiliate her with it.

"anything about him at all? and was it actually on the bar cause that's one place i'm yet to christen and i'd hate to think you bet me to it," chuck commented as she continued to ignore his pestering. but what she wouldn't admit is that she did know his name. she knew a lot about him actually. and he wasn't a random guy she met in a bar, that's just what she told nate or blair to avoid any questions she couldn't answer.

"shut up, chuck. i'd rather go back to talking about nate's sex life than mine," madi stopped him, suddenly wanting to change back to the previous topic she was just complaining about less than two minutes ago.

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❨2007❩

madi sat at her desk as she attempted her math homework though she didn't get very far before she started fiddling with anything and everything on her cluttered desk. she was distracted even further when she heard footsteps, turning towards the half-open door to see blair walk past.

she was confused as to why blair was home so early, especially after blair's description of her plans with nate tonight. with the amount of candles dorota was carrying while she trailed behind the teenager on their way to the hotel blair had booked, it seemed like blair wouldn't be back in all night.

the curiosity and sheer distaste for math encouraged madi to stand up and head towards the door where she saw blair heading straight for her own room, locking the door behind her quickly.

she then headed to her and blair's shared bathroom that divided their rooms, walking into blair's slightly larger bedroom to find her cousin crying under the rose gold covers on her bed.

"b? what's wrong?" madi hurried over to blair, sitting on the edge of the bed and waiting for a response.

"gossip girl was right," blair replied, the sentence barely audible as her voice was muffled by the pillow she had her face buried in.

"what?" madi questioned, not following what she was talking about.

"nate slept with serena," blair elaborated leaving madi shocked as she continued to explain more details, "the night of the shepard wedding before serena left. they had sex on the bar while he was supposed to be there as my date."

madi tried to hide the surprise on her face knowing it wouldn't make the girl feel any better. she knew nothing she could say in that moment would make blair feel any better so she moved over, pulling blair's head into her lap as she wiped the smudged mascara from under her eyes and pulled her hair out of her face while letting blair break down, holding tightly onto madi's hand for comfort.

𝒂 𝒎𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎
𝐋𝐈𝐕 <𝟑
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chapter one. you're welcome. i wrote this like forever ago and didn't bother changing much so it may sound a little weird but oh well. anyway, hope you liked it.

i never know what to write in author's notes so i guess just thanks for reading lol.

❨18.05.2022❩
© livsluvrs