THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY
fractured || five hargreeves x reader

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO: SCARED OF LIFE

Written By: peachyhxlland

°•.☆.•°

You've been lost in the freezing forest since you parted ways with Gene and Jean a while back. Since you had left Gene and Jean, you had continued to be attentive to your surroundings, which meant they could possibly have devised a plan to find you. By now, you were too far into your plan for any mistakes to not ruin everything.

After all, you've been preparing for this for years. The reunion with your family was the sole alteration to your original plan. You made up your mind to carry on with the plan even after they had returned. As soon as you handed Gene and Jean the first artifact, you started working on the plan. There was no going back from that point on.

You suddenly gripped your chest, panted, and leaned against a tree. As you attempted to calm yourself, you felt your entire body stiffen up. 'Breath, breath, breath...' You made an attempt to pay close attention to how your body moved in and out simultaneously with your breath. 'Get it together. You're fine. You're fine.'

You tried to walk, but you ultimately retreated back to the tree you were leaning against, squeezing and unclenching your hands in an effort to regulate your breathing. 'This is so stupid, so fucking stupid, stop it! Sort out your fucking head. STOP IT! Stop being so pathetic.'

Breathing heavily, you collapsed onto the ground and grabbed a handful of your hair. 'The plan is still in motion, (Y/n). I don't have the time for this. Not now. I have full control. I'm in control!'

"STOP IT!" You felt your chest constrict as though an enormous creature was trying to get out from inside of you, and you cried out to yourself while digging your nails into your scalp. "Get it together!"

"You miscalculated."

You blinked your eyes and turned around, seeing your present self leaning against the same tree you were leaning against. You released a disgruntled huff. "Shut up."

"You took over the body, but you and I are still the same. You're so full of anger but the anxiety of being alone is still there. We're still alone."

"Shut up!"

Your other self cast a gloomy stare at you. "We're both... broken." She stated. "No matter how powerful we both are, we're too broken enough that we, ourselves, are fighting over the control of our own body. You and I are the same, but different at the same time."

You forced yourself away from the tree and confronted your other self. "We are nothing alike. You're weak." You hissed. "You wanted the plan to work, don't you? But you bailed as soon as our family came to the picture. Did you forget that they were perfectly fine without us?"

"But... the plan is about taking them back." Your other self replied. "We got them back. The plan is useless now. Please, stop this. You're just so blinded by rage that you can't see that this is all wrong. We should be getting back to them and even saving Jennifer."

Your body trembled with rage and you closed your eyes.

"We can live normally with everyone."

Your eyes snapped open, and you punched your other self, only to end up punching the trunk of the tree. You panted as your fist remained on the trunk of the tree even when your hallucination was gone. Your body continued to tremble in anger, and tears streamed down for a few minutes until your cries slowly turned into chuckles. Your hands began to glow with powers, and your eyes were gradually turning red. With your powers, you used your hand to draw back and punch the tree once again, sending it flying.

You stared at what was left of the tree for a few seconds before inhaling deeply and breaking into a cackle. Your powers surrounded around you until you unleashed your powers and blasted away the surrounding trees. You watched as trees had been cut down and a bright red fire spread throughout the forest. You turned to face the exact spot where your other self once had stood. "Change of plans, (Y/n). I'm taking everything I deserve to have."

°•○●○•°

Klaus grumpily walked through the busy streets of the city. He had just left Allison's house, painfully leaving Claire alone in it. Remembering how he'd lashed out at Claire, he grimaced. Though he didn't want to yell out, he was hoping that Claire wouldn't think the worse of him for raising his voice at her. After robbing the house of a television and using the money to purchase a drink, Klaus ended his tough three-year sobriety.

Klaus prayed Ray wouldn't come looking for him after the mess he left at his house.

Klaus was suddenly bumped by a woman on the street, which caused him to burst out in anger. "Hey, hey, out of my way!" Klaus angrily yelled at everyone on his way as he flailed his arms around. "Watch it! Watch where you're going!" He shouted as he bumped into another person. "Move it! Out of my way!"

Klaus became excessively upset and gave tantrums until a ghost suddenly passed through him, which made him shudder. The ghost turned around and huffed. "Aw, come on, man. Really?" The ghost complained.

Klaus groaned in annoyance. "Oh, God! I hate all of you!" He screamed at the top of his lungs. "Hate all of you!"

After his angry episode, Klaus suddenly spotted something nearby. Klaus was unable to ignore noticing the sun shining on a familiar building and its logo. After contemplating for a while, while thinking about the time, Klaus took a deep breath and smiled. He just had an idea of how to handle all of this.

Klaus hurriedly entered the building and quickly navigated his way to the AA meeting room. He walked in and saw a woman getting ready to leave after simply rising to her feet. Just as she was taking her belongings, the woman saw Klaus and shook her head. "Uh, meeting's closed." She told him.

Klaus tilted his head in shock and curiosity. "What? Why?" He asked with a frown on his face.

The lady looked around and gestured at the empty chairs. "Nobody's here." She pointed out.

"I'm here." Klaus pointed to himself.

"Yeah, take a pamphlet."

Klaus sighed. "Listen, lady, I've been to enough court-ordered rehabs─"

"Uh, Stephanie." The woman introduced herself.

Klaus nodded. "Stephanie, I've been enough to court-ordered rehabs to know if one person shows up, then it's a meeting. And you might make a motion to adjourn, but I'm not seconding, and I've had one hell of a slip." Klaus clarified, going further as to say that he had consumed alcohol some hours prior. "And I'm not leaving until I get my one-day chip."

After giving it some thought, Stephanie let out a long sigh and motioned for Klaus to have a seat. "Sit."

Klaus held his hands together and smiled. "Thank you." Klaus sat down on the opposite side of Stephanie. "Oh, where to start? Goodness. Well, my name is Klaus─"

"Ah, ah, ah..." Stephanie stopped Klaus from talking. "If we're gonna be fucking about the rules, we're gonna be fucking about the rules."

Klaus smiled. "Okay."

With a collective sigh, Stephanie reached into her bag to retrieve her binder and opened it. "Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of people who share their experience, strengths─"

Stephanie was reading from the binder when Klaus interrupted her with a gentle clap of his hands. "It's true. Blah, blah, blah. Very, very important. You said that a thousand times. I've heard it a thousand times. But maybe we could get to the part where─?"

"The floor is now open for sharing." Stephanie announced, forcing a smile.

"Great!"

"Two minutes," Stephanie warned. "I repeat, two minutes with a 15-second warning." Her words were firm. Like a child eager to take part in a recitation, Klaus went along with it and put up his hand to offer to share. Stephanie let out a weary sigh. "How about you?"

Klaus pretended to be shocked and gasped softly. "Moi?"

Stephanie nodded. "Mhm."

"Thank you, Stephanie."

"You're welcome."

After taking a deep and long breath, Klaus got to his feet and spread his arms out. "Powerlessness!" He exclaimed as he put his hands on both sides of his head. Then he flung his fists in the air and lifted his arms. "Powerlessness." He repeated.

Klaus shook his head in realization. "Wow!" He exclaimed again. "It's... it's all right there in the first step. Little words on the page. But I never had any real understanding of what powerlessness meant or could mean. Until I was shot back in the fake town of New Grumpson, Maine, dying..." Klaus shuddered an inhale. "...and reanimating, dying, and reanimating, over and over again."

Klaus was silent for a moment and sat back down on the chair. "And before all that, I'd had three years clean. Three whole years." He stated. "But the problem was, I was trying to do it all by myself. Staying all closeted in my safe little bubble, scared of death, scared of life."

Stephanie nodded silently while listening carefully to Klaus and trying not to show her astonishment and confusion at his death and reanimation.

Klaus sighed as his past words lingered in his mind. "Scared of life." He said the same words again. "And..." Klaus let out a painful exhale after remembering what he told Allison and Claire. "...taking it out on..." His breathing started to hitch as he felt crying. "P..." Klaus inhaled deeply to keep it together. "Taking it out on the people who love me the most. So, I just want to say for the first time in my entire life, without irony, that my name is Klaus, and I am an alcoholic."

Stephanie nodded proudly and in understanding.

"And I am a complete drug addict," Klaus added. "And, while we're at it, I'm probably addicted to love, and sex, and tweezing all the tiny little body hairs─"

Stephanie shook her head. "Okay, Klaus." Before Klaus could say anything more about his specific desires, she cut him off. "I want to ask, what are you going to do now after this meeting?"

Klaus stared at Stephanie, softly nodding his head up and down to think. "To embrace who I am," He replied. "Embrace my powers, my ghosts, my everything, know? Because if my own family accepted me for who I am all these years, then I should be able to accept and love myself for who I am, too. I'm ready to live."

-•-°-•-°-☆

Sorry for the short chapter! Exams are coming up this week, so I might not be able to update again in the following days. (Maybe I can but not as regularly as before)

I was going to put the deleted scene after Allison and Claire save him at the pet cemetery (because it explains so much and it's a good scene), but I decided to put it on early and make a different story arc for him. I watched the deleted scene and while I was watching it, I was tearing up (close to crying but someone was watching me). Sad that they didn't put this scene in the final cut.