M I T H I L A,
MATA GARGI'S ASHRAM

SAUDAMINI'S POV

Eight years,

Time seemed to flow like the river beside me, sometimes slow and gentle, and sometimes rushing forward in a torrent. I'm sixteen now. A lot taller than I used to be when I was eight and some changes here and there which people referred to as puberty.

The sunlight dappled my dark hair as I hunched over my work. Now, my fingers are no longer the clumsy things they once were. They can now trace neat lines across the parchment I was currently working on, observing and writing the properties of the wildflowers I had recently discovered.

"These purple flowers," I murmured in a soft voice to the swaying blades of grass around me, a habit I had developed in my childhood.
"They seem to have properties that can soothe headaches. Maybe I'll try some next time my head throbs from all this studying."

A small smile played on my lips. Talking to the grass might seem odd, but here, beside the river, it feels perfectly natural.

No judgment, no expectations, just the quiet company of nature.

This gurukul is like a breath of fresh air after years that I spent within the imposing palace walls. The palace which was supposed to be my home was nothing but a place filled with cold silences and emptiness. There I was just like a small shadow, flitting from one deserted corner to another, afraid to draw attention.

But here, things are different-
The air was more alive, the sounds were softer, and the people... well, they actually see me.

"This one shows properties of helping a sore throat," I whispered to myself, tracing the delicate petals of a red wildflower I was sketching.

"Lost in your world again, Saudamini?"

I jumped a little and looked up to see Nandini approaching me with a grin stretched on her face. She was another girl from our gurukul.

"Just finishing some notes," I mumbled, feeling a familiar blush creeping up my cheeks. I wouldn't deny, everything was so interesting I often find myself zoning out at the most embarrassing time.

"Gurumaa is calling everyone for lunch!" she announced, already bubbling with the thought of delicious food.

"And you know what? Today Mata Gargi is making food for us herself!" She squealed with excitement, making a laugh escape my lips, a sound still surprising in its existence. Eight years ago, laughter was a forgotten sound for me.

I came out of my world, a smile tugging at my lips as Nandini's enthusiastic grip pulled me towards the sound of chattering where everyone is sitting for lunch.

My eyes fell over Anandi who was sharing her daily gossip with her sister Shriya, who as usual, was listening to her younger sister patiently with a huge smile on her lips.

Suddenly a memory came to my mind, as vivid as yesterday.

The night air was cool against my skin as I sat huddled beneath a giant banyan tree, hugging my knees. Tears welled up in my eyes, blurring the already dim moonlight.

A lump formed in my throat as I remembered the other children, laughing and chattering around as they knew each other from years. Even though I wanted to join them, to feel that fun, my doubts held me back.

They wouldn't like me.

Envy, a bitter taste on my tongue, filled my heart towards two girls who were chatting and laughing with other kids freely, without a care in the world.

One of them had hair the color of polished ebony, flowing down her back in a thick braid. Her eyes were of deep brown color that held a mischievous glint as she dragged the other girl, who looked a bit older and had a serene and calming beauty. She had deep brown coloured hair that cascaded down her back in gentle waves. Her eyes were the color of warm amber.

I clutched my knees to my chest, remembering how they were everything I wasn't - confident, carefree, seemingly effortlessly connected. A single tear escaped my eye, tracing a silent path down my cheek.

A rustling sound startled me, sending a shiver down my spine. I froze...

Squeezing my eyes shut, I expected another harsh voice to belittle me.

Instead, a soft voice broke the silence.

"Why are you alone here?"

I looked up, blinking back the tears. Standing before me was the same girl with dark, flowing hair and eyes sparkling with kind curiosity. Beside her stood another girl, with a calm demeanor, both of them radiating a warmth I hadn't expected.

"We saw you here," the girl continued with a gentle voice, "and we wanted to say hi. I'm Anandi and she's my elder sister Shriya."

The realization hit me with a jolt. These weren't just anyone - these were the princesses, Shriya and Anandi. The very ones I'd envied for so long.

Shame burned my cheeks, and I mumbled a hesitant greeting. I tried to speak but the words wouldn't come. They would think I am weird. I choked back a sob, the lump in my throat tightening.

"Is everything alright?" Shriya knelt beside her, her voice soft and soothing.

I shook my head, unable to speak.

"Would you like to be our friend?" Anandi asked, extending a hand towards me, her eyes shining with a kind sparkle.

I looked at her with wide eyes. They want to become my friends?

"Yes," a whisper unknowingly left my lips, and before I could realize it, a huge grin spread across their face...

The memory faded, and a soft laugh escaped my lips. How wrong I had been. The princesses, out of all the people, the very people I envied, had reached out to me when no one had.

Eight years had slipped by, like sand through clenched fists, and their friendship had become the most precious treasure in my life.

My father's harsh words still echo in my head and his letters still trouble me. But here, with Anandi and Shriya, his words hold little power. They saw the real me - curious and passionate for learning.

I couldn't help but smile as I saw Anandi spot me coming towards them. She grinned and waved excitedly, then practically leaped to her feet.

"Saudamini! You won't believe what I just heard!" she exclaimed, grabbing my hand before I could even blink.

Caught off guard, I stumbled slightly, with a laughter bubbling up in my chest. "Woah there, Anandi! Slow down," I said, trying to regain my balance. "What gossip do you have this time?"

Anandi just grinned, linking arms with both me and Nandini. "Come on, come on! Let's go!" she declared, dragging us both from where the delicious smells emanated, the paakashala.

She led me to where Shriya was sitting, shaking her head in amusement at her sister's antics. I adore how freely Anandi speaks her mind, eliciting an exasperated but loving facepalm from her elder sister Shriya - a daily highlight that never fails to bring a smile.

"There is a letter for you Saudamini."

The moment of joy was short-lived now. Letters are something that I despise from the bottom of my heart, for they are something that had always been a harbinger of woe, an evil reminder of my father's still existent hatred towards me.

I tried to suppress my disapproval with a hint of a smile that I had been learning to present to the world. People shouldn't be aware of how troubled you are, no matter what.

The world cares little about your pain.

I hid the letter in my waistband, away from the prying eyes.

I would open it when the oil burns from the lamp. Read it when the darkness intensifies. Cry myself to sleep when dawn is about to break.

"Saudamini, my child," I heard Gurumaa call out for me. I turned around, holding my skirt in my fists, walking over to where everyone had already settled down, probably waiting for me to join them.

A/N
Some readers might perceive Saudamini as a cry baby. xD

However, her upbringing had significantly impacted her confidence and ability to deal with people. (Which will be shown in upcoming chapters ofc-)

Having experienced such a toxic home environment, it's normal for her to find joy in even small gestures of kindness.

Thank You xD